Song Challenge! - Part 56

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler
Date: 22 Jun 01 - 04:15 AM

I offer this as a possible future challenge, scope for sentimental song: (BTW the pig was saved by the judge)

The owner of a retired celebrity pig is fighting a legal battle to save him from the foot-and-mouth slaughter. Grunty, a rare Maori kune kune pig, starred in a children's television film and has his own website.

But his fame did not stop an inspector from the Department for Environment Food and Rural Affairs (Defra) from ordering him to be culled under the foot-and-mouth regulations.

Grunty's farm in Somerset was condemned because his owner had visited another of her holdings, which turned out to be infected.

Rosemary Upton, of Hill Farm, Stawley, near Wellington, Somerset, is applying for permission to seek a judicial review.

Appearing for her, Stephen Smith QC, suggested that Grunty had a much stronger case for survival than Phoenix the calf, saved after a blaze of publicity in April.

Grunty starred in Pig at the Ritz on Channel Five and in pleasanter times has accompanied Mrs Upton on trips to the local village.
(c)BBC ONline

RtS

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: Amos
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 05:44 PM

Marvelous brilliant, McGrath!!!

The whole lot of youse are top-drawer, which is where he shoulda kept the dang bird!!!

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 05:25 PM

I saw this one in the paper, and was just thinking of suggesting it. Amos beat me to it - he moves quick. I couldn't resistthis:

Mynah's Lifeguard

"Mynah's life is life in danger
of the silence of the grave.
If he tells just any stranger
How the old man misbehaved.
If the missus chanced to hear ye,
Careless bird you're sure to fail
So keep your mind upon your birdseed
And that beak tucked up your tail."
Union Mynah's sing together,
Do not heed the master's wail -
Tell the truth and shame the master,
And the missus will prevail.

"I've been locked there in a prison,
I've been laughed at for his fun.
What have I to show for talking
since my Mynah's life begun?
Worn out beak and worn out tonsils,
Broken voice and seed that's stale,
You can take your bloody birdseed,
You can stuff it up your tail."
Union Mynah's sing together,
Do not heed the master's wail -
Tell the truth and shame the master,
And the missus will prevail.

"For the truth is, birds with memory
Keep your falsehoods in our mind.
God provides for every Mynah
If he tells the truth in time.
And like bold birds of a feather
Victory will sure prevail.
Mynahs strike, and win together,
If we'll only tell the tale."
Union Mynahs sing together,
Do not heed the master's wail -
Tell the truth and shame the master,
And the missus will prevail.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: GUEST,Coal Mynah
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 05:09 PM

The second part is slow 12 bar blues, to be performed similar in style and tempo to "Love in Vain" (Robert Johnson) as done by the Rolling Stones. The Intro you probably know.

Blues In a Mynah Key

Intro

Now the bird heard the bird heard the word
The bird bird bird Bird heard the word

She came back home from the station, with a suitcase in her hand
Well she, back home from the station, with a suitcase in her hand
When she came back home from the station, I was still her lovin' man

Next day when I came home she didn't say a word
Next day when I came home she didn't say a word
She said that she was tired, I blamed it on the bird

She went out to see a lawyer to see if she can sue
She went out to see a lawyer to see if she can sue
She asked me for a divorce, I don't know what to do

I could tell the bird was lonely when I went to work you see
I could tell the bird was lonely so I turned on the TV
What is daytime TV about? D - I - V -O- R- C- E

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: MMario
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 04:38 PM

I prufred it ! Honest!

dang html!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: MMario
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 04:30 PM

Mynahs Can'T Testify
(tune: Long Black Veil)


She walks Chongqing, with her mynah bird tale
She visits the judge, and the mynah bird wails
"Nobody knows, nobody sees
Just the telephone and me..."

Two weeks ago, I had just come back
From my parents home, I was not un-packed
I was all alone, just my mynah and me
That bird it said "D,I,V,O,R,C,E"

chorus:

I thought it strange, that a bird should spell
And such a word, bizarre as hell!
Then it said "My dear, please patient be
"we'll just have to wait, for the final decree

chorus

Since that day, when the phone it rings
the feathered tattle tale birdie sings
Each word it says, it has heard before,
From my cheating Husband, so I'm out the door!

chorus

Judge, can you swear in a mynah bird?
The truth in this tale now it should be heard
This bird doesn't lie, I will swear my life
Please make me no longer, that bastard's wife!

chorus


--- Line break fixed. ---

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: mousethief
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 04:26 PM

APPLAUSE! Well done, Sharon The Self-Flagellant!

Maybe if the courts don't grant her a divorce, she can still have her husband prosecuted for contributing to the delinquency of a mynah?

Okay, sorry, I'm off to write a song.

Alex

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: GUEST,SharonA
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 04:17 PM

Okey dokey...

(To the tune of "I've Been Working on the Railroad")

I've been staying with my parents
All the month of May.
I've been staying with my parents
And I just got home today.
Can't you hear the mynah crowing,
Saying the word until he's hoarse?
Can't you hear the lawyer shouting:
"Mynah, say 'divorce' "?

Mynah, won't you say
Mynah, won't you say
Mynah, won't you say "divorce"?
Mynah, won't you say
Mynah, won't you say
Mynah, won't you say divorce"?

Husband's in the kitchen with Mynah
Husband's in the kitchen, I know
Husband's in the kitchen with Mynah
Whisp'ring in the phone so low

Saying: "Let's go fiddle around-o
"Let's go fiddle around-o
"Let's go fiddle around-o"
Whisp'ring in the phone so low!

Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 56
From: Áine
Date: 21 Jun 01 - 03:45 PM

I love this Challenge! idea from Amos -- even though I had a great plumbing story to give you (hahahaha) -- So, let's ruffle some feathers around this birdcage with:

Polly Want a Divorce? SHANGHAI (Reuters) - A Chinese housewife is seeking divorce claiming the family's talking bird dropped clues on her husband's illicit affair, state media said on Tuesday.

The woman from southwestern Chongqing city said she uncovered the affair when their mynah began saying things like "Divorce," "I love you" and "Be patient" after it overheard the husband's telephone calls with his mistress, the Xinmin Evening News said.

The woman said she noticed the feathered tattle-tale's strange new vocabulary after she returned from a month-long visit with her parents that started in May. Already suspecting her husband was having an affair, she observed that the bird became particularly talkative whenever the telephone rang, confirming her suspicions, the report said.

Last week she brought the bird to a law office for consultation, hoping it could testify in court.

"Can my mynah be used as witness?" the newspaper quoted her as asking.

Lawyers were not optimistic. "The judges are unlikely to rule against your husband based only on the mynah's words," attorney Wu Di was quoted as telling her.

Go (or flap) For It, Challenge!rs!!

-- Áine