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BS: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote!
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 01:59 PM And who is Bill Sables? Never heard of him. - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: John MacKenzie Date: 24 Aug 01 - 02:04 PM Well I always wanted to be introduced to Lt. Ohura {?} but I'll vote for the one that didn't make my chad pregnant. Jock |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: GUEST,Melani Date: 24 Aug 01 - 02:09 PM Geez, this is a tough one. Spaw, can we hear you say, "Beam me up Scotty!"? |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 02:10 PM And what does this word "chad" mean? It's "Uhura". I can definitely assure you that she did not make your chad pregnant. Is a chad some variety of tribble? - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 02:12 PM So far Spaw appears to be in the lead...sort of. What a mess. - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: JenEllen Date: 24 Aug 01 - 02:21 PM Well, as strangely flattering as that is, Jack the Sailor, I'm going to have to decline the nomination on the grounds that up until a few minutes ago, I had no idea who that other woman was. Apparently, I need to quit being so damn sexy and start watching some television. So, in true democratic form, I'd like to sell my votes to Spaw. Yeah, all that and she's cheap too...*bg* ~JE |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: catspaw49 Date: 24 Aug 01 - 02:43 PM As you can see Hawk, I am leading by hook or by crook......and by a nice margin. Also, it should be clear by this time that a confusing recount will be in order and as you are already having trouble judging intent of the voter, this promises to be court battle. Combine this with the fact that I suspect you'll find some stuffing going on, like Big Mick and his spudded thong, that you concede the whole thing to me now. If that isn't enough, your boy Shatass has been admitted to the NYCFTTS and of course, as was the case with Eagleton, the whole thing goes down the tubes immediately. He is in a private room and is being heavily guarded......sedation didn't seem necessary since mo one can tell about him anyway. The Shatner Wannabee's at the Rehab Clinin are still messing about. AS you know, in their efforts to be like Bill, they pounced on a passing Amish family and had their way with the horse......a gelding no less! The Amish folks are still traumatized but they're making nasty noises about Shatner nonetheless. Cletus, Paw, Buford, the Reg Boys, Cleigh O'Possum, the Little Pissant, and the entire staff at the NYCFTTS all voted for me BTW, so that's 8 plus 122. Skiff can verify the NYCFTTS voting of course. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 24 Aug 01 - 03:06 PM JenEllen, That fact that you didn't know who she was simply adds to your mystique and makes you sooooooo much sexier! In fact I am going to add that question to my Official First Date Filter Questions List.
Me: "Do you know who Captian Janeway is?" Sorry, You cannot transfer the votes to Spaw. I already voted for his Hammered Dulcimer in the male category. However, if you would care to throw your support behind a female.... We're listening!!! |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 03:23 PM Jack - Did you mean "Caption Janeway" perhaps...? I am thinking of replacing Woody Allen as the official Pedantic Party candidate, but I can see them going down to utter defeat already, so on second thought, never mind. Spaw - Your corrupt efforts to pack the ballot box will get you nowhere. Well, nowhere useful anyway... Blown possums are not allowed to vote. Unblown possums? Well...we haven't made our minds up about that yet, but probably not either. Skiff is not regarded as a particularly credible witness around here. You're just going to have to get all those supposed staff members to post to this thread themselves if you expect their votes to count. I could just as well say that all the morons in Orillia have decided to vote for Shatner, and declare him the victor by a landslide. You follow? A question. How many Reg boys are there? I've been wondering about that. Can they be bribed with back bacon? Are you sure that's the real William Shatner you have at the NYCFTTS? My impression is that the real one hung up on us again a few minutes ago, after saying something really quite uncharacteristic and insensitive. Perhaps what you have there is a particularly successful Shatner Wannabe who has managed to become almost indistinguishable from the original. If so, we could use him for publicity shots. - LH p.s. Conrad Black has dumped the National Post. Saw it on the front page today. Celebration time!
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: GUEST,Walking Eagle Date: 24 Aug 01 - 03:31 PM Spaw cuz he lives in, or near Columbus, OH. I KNOW where the Clippers play ball! |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Lin in Kansas Date: 24 Aug 01 - 03:44 PM I vote Swap. So do all 12 of my alternate personalities. Otherwise, I'll beat them to death with my tiple. Resident, Room 2500 at NYCFTTS |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 03:46 PM Ha! Ha! Ha! I like that one. What exactly is a "tiple" anyway? How does the NYCFTTS afford such expansive facilities? What is the dimension of your room? - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Gareth Date: 24 Aug 01 - 03:48 PM Abstain - remember it's not the votes that count, it's who counts the votes. Question, are the Mud elves manipulating this ? Gareth |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 24 Aug 01 - 04:12 PM Caption Janeway??????? Does she write cartoons?? Did I spel Capten wrong again? The dimension of MY room is The Twilight Zone.. A dimension which is neither time nor space.. Where a wooden actor can be introduced by an equally wooden announcer..... Gotta go.. there's a gremlin on my wing. |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Diva Date: 24 Aug 01 - 04:16 PM I'm with lonesome ej on this one.. Bill Sables gets my vote..a gentleman and he makes wonderful tea. Diva |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Burke Date: 24 Aug 01 - 04:52 PM I guess I'm about 12 years old again when my family watched Star Trek religiously, before it was in syndication! Then over, and over, and over, and over in re-runs. What did/do I know or care about acting? What did/do I care that he has a woman in every port? I loved him just as much as all those different women who loved him week after week. I was an Indian maiden, a 1930's soup kitchen worker. He gave me life just like the robot who became real when he kissed her. It has to be Shatner all the way, even if he is Canadian. |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 05:18 PM Celebration in the Shatner camp! They have finally cracked the 5 official votes threshold! Meanwhile, Spaw is well ahead with an estimated 17 to 143 votes, depending on whose tally you go by...sounds like Florida all over again...no hint of corruption here, folks! Strangely enough, Bill Sables and Rick Fielding are tied for 3rd place. Who'd a thunk it? Gee whillickers, it makes my eyes go all round and empty, like Little Orphan Annie. Arf! (Sandy) - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Rick Fielding Date: 24 Aug 01 - 05:57 PM Oh, the HUMANITY! Oh, the AGONY! Oi the ECSTACY! To wander in here by mistake (I thought it was a serious discussion on whether to join "The Hair Club For Men")....and to find Joe Offer, the crusader for 'meaningful threads" here! Not only that, but he drags me in, and puts me on public display with that Enquirer photo of me trying to jam a ceramic rodent up my nose! Joe, I don't care whether you're on the Pope's list for future canonization or not...I'm dragging you into the next silly thread I find! but can you show me how to turn that lighthouse into something more salacious?! Rick |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: AliUK Date: 24 Aug 01 - 06:22 PM *captain's log* STARDATE 2597: I seem to be having some problems blowing my possum ocharina. Ensign Cletus showed how to form my lips but the damned rat's tail keeps getting in the way. I now know that I shall never equal the twentieth century's greatest musician. ( taken from the lost logs of the Star Ship Enterprise) 'bout sums it up for me. Spaw's the law |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Amos Date: 24 Aug 01 - 06:38 PM So!! I am happy to announce as the official chairman of the state Electoral Board for the State of Bewilderment, that the results are now all in and the winner is Spaw by a generous margin, certified as being greater than .375 per cent. Now that's a clear-cut lead, and so the polls are now closed. No overseas votes will be counted after 3:40 PM Pacific Time, 6:40 PM EST on August 24 (now). Congraturation, Sexiest-Erect Spaw! Rots of Ruck in your new positions! Ah-so Amusant Seirf, Chairman, State Electoral Board |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Troll Date: 24 Aug 01 - 06:47 PM I said earlier that I abstained from voting but Angie informs us that she wants to vote for 'Spaw, "'cause he's a good daddy". Freddy abstains and Chuck's unconscious as usual. Mr. Feebish wants more time to study the "issues". Whatever. troll |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: CarolC Date: 24 Aug 01 - 07:48 PM *Pedant alert!* A possum is a marsupial. Not a rodent. Rats are smart. Possums are not smart. You think a rat would let you blow up its ass? Think again. |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 24 Aug 01 - 08:37 PM That is a damn good point Carol. And so ends another farcical election, courtesy of WSSBS TV, with Spaw declared the official winner by a possum's ass. Shatner's concession speech is expected at any time. Most serious analysts credit the barely acknowledged Patrick Stewart as the Ralph Nader of this election, and rate him far sexier than either Spaw or Shatner, but what can you do? It's the unwashed masses who rule here, and they want Spaw. Gawd, I can hear them chanting out in the street now... "WE WANT SPAW! WE WANT SPAW! WE WANT SPAW!" Fine then. You've got him. Don't come whining to us a year or two from now, bemoaning your bad judgement! You're stuck with the bugger for the next 4 years. Maybe for life! And you coulda had Patrick Stewart. Whatta buncha losers! Geez. You really oughta move to Canada, Carol... :-) - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: CarolC Date: 24 Aug 01 - 08:55 PM *GRIN* Packing my bags right now, LH! |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Troll Date: 25 Aug 01 - 01:23 AM Carol. Skeptic and I will instantly go into mourning the moment you cross the border. But we know you'll be back. You'll soon see what a charade... But I must'nt speak ill of our neighbor to the north. I mean they can't help it. troll ***BG*** |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: CarolC Date: 25 Aug 01 - 01:35 AM troll, it sure is nice to have you back. Say hi to Skeptic for me. |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: GUEST,The Washed Masses Date: 25 Aug 01 - 02:21 AM Darn. If only I'd opened this thread earlier. I coulda had Patrick Stewart. He beats all the other candidates, hands down. And he coulda put his hands down... never mind. |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: gnu Date: 25 Aug 01 - 06:24 AM The Starship Possum ? Even the Borg are laughing, collectively... BUT, wait until they find out they can't put Spaw's eminations off their ship with a transporter ! You thought that last explosion was a doosey ?! The Federation will rule forever - if the Universe does not "begin" again after Spaw messes with the fermament. fermament - sp ? anyone ? |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 25 Aug 01 - 07:35 PM It's spelled "firmament". Nice to hear from The Washed masses! A vote for Patrick Steward is a vote for taste, breeding, character and sanity. Bravo! - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: khandu Date: 25 Aug 01 - 08:01 PM It's spelled "Stewart". khandu |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Helen Date: 25 Aug 01 - 08:01 PM Being of a scientific and objective mind, I have no intentions of stating which of the two are sexier until I have had an opportunity to test both of them out in the sex-lab. Your appointments, therefore, are for tomorrow - one morning appointment and one afternoon appointment. I have kept my testing schedule clear for the evening, just in case I find it necessary to re-test one or both of the test subjects. Dr Helen, Sexologist
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 25 Aug 01 - 08:06 PM khandu - Yes it is! Pardon me. A careless typo. - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: khandu Date: 25 Aug 01 - 08:18 PM LH...I meant to put a "BG" or a ":D" in the mis-spelled post! So I typoed,too! :D khandu |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 25 Aug 01 - 08:32 PM Yeah, it happens even to arch-pedants like myself. Thus are the proud humbled... - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 25 Aug 01 - 09:01 PM Shatner couldn't possibly get a piece of ass from a possum and....besides....he....talks.....like..... this! Always got on my nerves once I grew old enough to know that phasers and the Enterprise weren't real. I very reluctantly vote Spaw, unless Perot wants to buy his way into this one. Rich |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 25 Aug 01 - 09:14 PM Amazing. It's over, done, finished, kaput, history, defunct, yesterday's news... And they're still voting! Sort of like the Battle of New Orleans... - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Geoff the Duck Date: 26 Aug 01 - 11:37 AM If you want to finish your arguments in a more relaxed setting I think I just saw Kirk entering the bar on Mudcat 5. Come and join us! Quack! |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Amergin Date: 26 Aug 01 - 03:27 PM Now having met her...I would have to say JenEllen....and I am beginning to wonder if LH counts nekkid Shatners jumping fences when he is trying to sleep.... |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 26 Aug 01 - 04:13 PM My God, what a sick thought! It would have to be a fairly low fence these days, I'm thinking... I had a totally sleepless night on Friday...headache. I was ready to happily die by morning, and staggered out in search of aspirins (there were NONE at home). The only thing that could have made it worse was to be counting naked "S**tners" all night. Gimme a break. - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Amergin Date: 26 Aug 01 - 06:28 PM God, LH, I hate those....and there never seem to be any drugs around when I need them..... |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: John MacKenzie Date: 27 Aug 01 - 01:39 PM 42 jock |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 27 Aug 01 - 01:41 PM Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, I suppose? Amazing how these threads perpetuate themselves... - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler Date: 28 Aug 01 - 06:00 AM I've been too busy counting the votes at the NYCFTTS to contribute before now and I'm mortified that LH has questioned my probity, I always thought he was a nice guy. However, I can verify that every pregnant chad is a vote for 'Spaw ( where were the Trojans when you needed them, boss?). Now, who's the greatest Canadian musician? I'd have to say Oscar Peterson (sorry, Rick 'n' LH!), but then I'm just an old jazz fan. RtS ("not a particularly credible witness" indeed! Grumble, grumble, sulk, sulk,) |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: GUEST,Celtic Soul Date: 28 Aug 01 - 10:30 AM Well, sheeoot! No one said this was a write-in election!! And BTW, though Stewart has it coming and going with appeal, the man was not very nice to his wife of many years, so he loses points with me. As long as we're dreaming here, how about Timothy Dalton? Or (Oh sh**, I can't remember the guys name...was in "My left foot" and "Last of the Mohicans"???). |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Liz the Squeak Date: 28 Aug 01 - 10:34 AM Spaw. No contest. The contest would be if it were Spaw and Sean Connery.... now there's a battle royal!! LTS |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 28 Aug 01 - 12:51 PM This thread is like a really bad odor...it just won't go away. I am touched by the faith of those who have continued to vote even after S**tner's concession speech, in a last ditch effort to put him over the top. Although, most of them seem to be voting for Spaw...strange. - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Liz the Squeak Date: 28 Aug 01 - 05:58 PM I didn't get down to the Shatner speech thread until after I posted to this one. I've been living in a field for 6 days, OK? And just to be really scary, I logged off here, turned on the TV and there was Shatner, pretending to be a USA Army officer..... Aaargghhh! LTS |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Little Hawk Date: 28 Aug 01 - 07:07 PM He's everywhere, he's everywhere! - LH |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: GUEST,rr Date: 01 May 02 - 06:12 PM Shatnerization? |
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Subject: RE: Who is sexier? Spaw or Shatner? Vote! From: Bobert Date: 01 May 02 - 09:59 PM Heck, I just thought that since I have never been the 100th poster on a Catbox thread, that I might win a $12 toaster oven or something so I'z here to cast my undimpled chad vote fir.... ahhhh..... hmmmmmm? Who's runnin' again? And fir what? Danged, I hate it when this happens.... Danged! |