BS: Do people steal toilet paper?

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: GUEST,Rob
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 10:52 AM

then of course there is the TRUE story of the bloke who sitting minding his own business is asked by the person in the neighbouruing cubicle if he has some paper as he has none.And could he pass it under the gap. So he peels off a few sheets and passes them under. The guy on the other side stands on his hand robs his watch and runs for it. So be warned next time someone asks you to pass some through.

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: artbrooks
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 10:58 AM

Then there's the story, from a Seamus Kennedy CD, about the drunk who goes into a confessional. The priest says "how may I help you, my son" and the guy replies "is there any paper on your side". Seamus tells it better.

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: SharonA
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 11:04 AM

Yorkshire Tony: Standing a cat in a sink with even a small amount of water in it is a risky proposition! What I do with my long-haired cat, when the inevitable happens, is to hold him on my lap or lay him down on the floor and wipe him up gently with wet paper towels (he's placid enough that I don't have to wrap him in a cloth towel to keep him from clawing, but that wouldn't be a bad idea). There again, the thought is to simulate his being cleaned by a mother-cat. Afterwards I pat him dry and let him clean up the rest of the dampness (and whatever residue may remain) from his fur himself.

As to the toilet paper subject: I went to my doctor's office last week, and in the restroom was one of those toilet paper dispensers that doesn't dispense. It was empty, and above it was a makeshift wooden shelf screwed into the wall with a loose roll of toilet paper sitting on the shelf. Seems it was too much of a pain to FILL the dispenser as well as empty it!

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Kim C
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 11:40 AM

I am not talking about using "extra" when you're in the stall, or even taking some back to your cube to be prepared when it runs out. I am talking about taking it off the premises. I mean, if I were going to steal something from an office, it sure as heck wouldn't be TP!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Blackcatter
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 01:29 PM

When it comes to "why so many brands of TP" - In a free-market society, different types of a product are in direct proportion to the importance of that product in everyday life. Check out your local grocery - paper products, cereal, bread, soda, beer, dog & cat food all have huge varieties. They figure that there is a huge market already, that all they have to do is find a small market of a percentage point or two of the total amount to be successful.

That's why there's only a couple different brands of pickled herring.

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 02:11 PM

fogie, think about it. Men use toilet paper perhaps once or twice a day. Women use it every time they visit the facility...

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 03:53 PM

YOR said:

"When Martha Stewart goes to jail, do you think she will like the toilet paper there?"

Probably too well-bred and inhibited to actually SAY anything about it, if she doesn't like it. But the color on those walls has GOT to GO!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: YOR
Date: 16 Aug 02 - 11:00 PM

Oh, lets sell this idea to Fox, "Martha Stewart Does Time Reality Series".

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 17 Aug 02 - 01:25 AM

"Hey buddy!"
"What?"
"You got any toilet paper in your stall?"
"Nope. None here."

Long pause

"Hey, buddy!"
"What?"
"You got five ones for a five?"

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Banjer
Date: 17 Aug 02 - 07:08 AM

When participating in Civil War reenactments in most locales PortaLets are the only facilities available. Sometimes they are not serviced as regulalrly as one would like and consequently run out of necessaary supplies. Several rolls of extra paper are a standeard commodity in our camp gear. Since our unit is an Artillery unit we are usually situated on the 'outskirts' of most camps, nearer the facilities than most others. When paper ran out in one of them one of our troops once posted a sign in the Portalet that paper was for sale for a nickel a sheet in our camp! We actualy had folks offering to buy whole rolls of paper from us! (Being fellow campers, we supplied them at no charge of course) Sure could be a lucrative business, rip off all the rolls in the johns and sell them to whoever needs them!!

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Aug 02 - 10:06 AM

Just an update on the silly thread-topic race:

Current score:

Do people steal toilet paper? - 60 posts

Why do men wear socks with sandals? - 56 posts

Which one will reach 100 posts first? It's neck and neck going into the final turn.

(Intentional double posts and unnecessary refreshes will be grounds for disqualification.)
Bruce

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: YOR
Date: 17 Aug 02 - 12:55 PM

Bruce, Did you post the score in both threads to keep it fair?

Can you spare just 3 squares?

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Wincing Devil
Date: 18 Aug 02 - 10:19 PM

I remember going to lunch at the Washington Navy Yard's O club. The was a gent ther we called "The Napkin Man". He'd stuff his pockets with paper napkins.

To the tune of The Muffin Man: The Napkin Man, The Napkin Man, stuffing his pockets as much as he can!

As to TP, there is no worse feeling than getting down to the core in the middle of "the task". Unless it's having to use the core itself!

Sailors at sea used clam shells, so "quicherbitchin"!

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: X
Date: 18 Aug 02 - 11:19 PM

I haven't a square to spare.

Liz, That was the Spotted Owl I was speaking of. ;o)

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: Kim C
Date: 19 Aug 02 - 10:48 AM

Here in the South people used to use corn cobs. Now, I have never tried this myself, but I understand that corn cobs are actually pretty soft once they dry out.

I knew it was a silly thread, and I said so in the first post. But I wanted to know of the threat of TP theft is really so great that we desk-slaves should be deprived of this staple during the workday.

Subject: RE: BS: Do people steal toilet paper?
From: EBarnacle1
Date: 19 Aug 02 - 01:58 PM

Going back a bit, consider that the people whose job it is to gatekeep all of these trivial items would probably be unemployable if they were not sitting there counting beans. Also consider the power they feel when they hand out 25 staples to you. Just by asking, their lives have been lightened.