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BS: Stupid Qwestions

Cluin 28 Nov 04 - 04:12 PM
GUEST,Harmoni 28 Nov 04 - 04:42 PM
Uncle_DaveO 28 Nov 04 - 05:11 PM
Moses 29 Nov 04 - 11:48 AM
GUEST 29 Nov 04 - 01:39 PM
jonm 29 Nov 04 - 04:18 PM
*Laura* 29 Nov 04 - 04:35 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: Cluin
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 04:12 PM

Or would we be blood brothers once removed?


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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: GUEST,Harmoni
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 04:42 PM

A couple of tourist questions:


A tourist asked if our Canadian flag comes in any other colours.

Another tourist asked why Gene Wilder was on our $10 bill.


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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 28 Nov 04 - 05:11 PM

GUEST,heric said:

A guy once asked me if the Pope was Catholic.

Two things here:

That phrase, "Is the Pope Catholic?", as you might already know, is used to mean "Of course!"

But there are extremely, radically conservative Catholics who seriously will tell you that the Pope is not Catholic, on the ground that he and his recent predecessors have abandoned what these old-liners insist are the very essence of historical Catholicism.

Dave Oesterreich


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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: Moses
Date: 29 Nov 04 - 11:48 AM

Not a stupid question, but a VERY irritating statement when I have just settled myself into an empty seat (bus, meeting, cinema etc.) and the person seated next to me says "Sorry, someone is sitting there".

Just once, I got up, turned round and addressed this imaginery person with the words "I do apologise for sitting on you". Surprisingly little reaction was shown.

Why did I get up? If there is a next time I shall say in a very loud voice "YOU'LL HAVE TO SPEAK UP, I'VE LEFT MY HEARING AID AT HOME" and continue in that vein until they get fed up and leave (or someone much larger and uglier than me turns up to claim their seat).


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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: GUEST
Date: 29 Nov 04 - 01:39 PM

I'm out in the yard tending to some steaks on gas barbecue and my nosey neighbor (that nobody likes much) says, "Hey neighbor, barbecuing today are you?" I want to say, "Nah. I'm going into the blacksmith trade and this here is my firebox." Ah-duuhhh!

I worked in the lumber department at Home Depot (a chain of huge D.I.Y. warehouses). While stacking some boards, surrounded by nothing but wood in all directions, a customer comes up and says, "'Scuse me, is this lumber?" I was barely able to keep myself from saying, "Nah. This is a toothpick factory, and all this wood here you see is just waitin' to be cut up into little tiny pieces."

All Home Depot employees are required to wear a bright orange apron while on the clock. So, I'm on the sales floor at the Home Depot putting way some merchandise on the shelves, and a customer walks up and says, "Hey, do you work here?" I managed to resist the temptation to repond with, "Nah. I'm just wearing this orange apron as a fashion statement."

S


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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: jonm
Date: 29 Nov 04 - 04:18 PM

So there I am in my lunchbreak, looking through the CDs in a store up the road, when someone asks me where the musicals are.

I realise that, in a suit and still wearing an ID badge, they think I might work there, so I show them the badge.

"So, you're a lecturer from the college as well. Do you know where I can find South Pacific?"


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Subject: RE: BS: Stupid Qwestions
From: *Laura*
Date: 29 Nov 04 - 04:35 PM

"So this Guy Faulks bloke - do we let him off or what?"

or my variation -

"So this George Bush bloke - he's not so bad is he?"

xLx


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