LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 Nov 10 - 04:45 PM

Today a friend emailed me about another friend who has recently been diangnosed with ovarian cancer. She sent me contact information (with the woman's permission) and I spent an hour and a half on the phone answering questions and sharing. It felt really, REALLY good to be able to be of some help and to pay it forward a bit.

Also, I met a woman at yoga last night (it was her first time there) and I was wearing one of my Survivor t-shirts which opened up a conversation about cancer in her family. We talked to freely and openly that my yoga teacher came over and asked if we knew one another...we laughed and said no. It was one of those instant connections and a knowingness that a new friend has been found. Bonus? She lives maybe 3 miles from my house. :)

Love to all,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 12 Nov 10 - 05:40 PM

Five or six years ago my boss' wife found a lump, and she called him at work to tell him the biopsy came back breast cancer. He went home for a few hours, and when he returned he looked shell shocked. I didn't have breast cancer, mine was a uterine form, but I think he was feeling so adrift when the diagnosis first hit that it was a huge boost to his morale when I stopped in his office to ask how things were.

"You had cancer!" he stated, and realized of course, there were several of us in the library, all walking around to talk about it. And our library family of cancer survivors, just being there, was a big help to them, I think. He looked so much better just to have had a cancer survivor come by and provide the clear evidence that it isn't a death sentence. That phone call you made was probably critically important for your friend's friend.

Keep up the good work, Michelle!

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 12 Nov 10 - 05:49 PM

I'll second that!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 16 Nov 10 - 11:11 AM

I never in a million years would have thought I'd say that having cancer comes with certain gifts, but it does. One of the biggest gifts for me has been meeting and getting to know Tracy. You've seen me write about her before. The weekend before last, she stood with my family as Jeremiah's Godmother.....she means so very much to me and I am thankful for her on a daily basis.

This morning she called me with some test results that require action and soon. She isn't sure she wants to follow through with those actions and she knows (and has shared) the consequences of waiting or not acting at all. She called me from outside in the rain to ask what I would do. She didn't call her family. She didn't call her pastor, she called ME because (she said) I understand. We talked about what each choice would mean and possible outcomes. The doctors were wanting her to sign a consent for surgery and she didn't know what to do. I told her that if it were me, I'd sign the papers, go home and enjoy Thanksgiving with my family and THINK about it. It is HER choice and she can always cancel if she decides that is the road she wants to take. She said she hadn't thought of that and quickly hung up the phone to go sign papers.

I totally respect her and whatever her choice may be...both are difficult and my heart is aching for her today.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Nov 10 - 11:31 AM

Even without practicing a religion, one can always understand the sentiment "there but for the grace of god go I."

I think this is an example of how we can heap guilt, through sadness, upon ourselves. This news opens an opportunity where you can offer a huge amount of help, but don't forget to protect your heart just a little. Here's wishing the best of luck to Tracy, and take care of yourself in the process, Michelle. The weight of the world is to big for one person.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 16 Nov 10 - 12:00 PM

Yeah....I know. You are right. I'm not feeling guilty or trying to fix anything....I'm just wanting to hug my friend, cry on her shoulder while she cries on mine.

I told her today that I have her Christmas gifts already (neener neener...I said that too) and her response was to not wait until I have to put flowers on her grave.

*Pause*

Perhaps Santa will arrive at Tracy's house a little sooner than she expects.

Cancer sucks. Cancer sucks. Cancer sucks. Cancer sucks. Cancer sucks. CANCER SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS.

*rant over for now*

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Bobert
Date: 16 Nov 10 - 04:47 PM

Yes, cancer sucks... Glad yer out there for these folks, Michelle... It means alot to them...

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 16 Nov 10 - 05:06 PM

Bobert,

   I remember well how much it meant to me to be able to talk to someone or write and read a response. I'm not sure I'd have made it through without it.

Seriously.

The least I can do is listen. She called again today, by the way and said thank you for being (kind &) firm with her (as she has been with me when I'm a disaster area). She did sign the surgery papers and was happy to be reminded that it is her body and that she has choices.

A plan is in the works for them to come over for a BBQ and a night of Scrabble, cards, a movie or just mindless (or maybe not so mindless) chatter. She is delighted.

Me too. :)

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: katlaughing
Date: 16 Nov 10 - 10:35 PM

You learned from other "wise women" on the same journey and now, as we all knew, you are your own wise woman and passing that gift on to others. What SRS and Bobert both say are important, as you know. The other is to protect yourself from the fear, too. It can so easily come to the heart and mind when we empathise so well, esp. with someone who is going through what we've been through ourselves. It is all too easy to imagine ourselves in their shoes. Just remember, fear is not helpful for anyone. You are here, well and capable. Yes, it is very sad and there will be tough times to get through in helping your friend, but you are here, well, and have a strength born of courage through adversity and we all love you.:-)

kat

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 17 Nov 10 - 06:04 AM

I can't add anything to what Kat, Stilly & Bobert have said

love from sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: SINSULL
Date: 15 Dec 10 - 01:36 PM

Some time spent with you and the baby is probably just what she needs. Enjoy your time together, Lily.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 15 Dec 10 - 05:21 PM

Tracy came through the surgery with flying colors (after being told she had a 37% chance of survival...who comes up with these numbers?!?!?) and not only that but both tumors look to be benign!!! Pathology still has to come back but the surgeon says all looks GREAT! HOORAY!!!

As for me, I spent today watching ovarian cancer videos....survivors and stories of those who didn't survive. I don't know why I needed to do that today....I just did. It's been a year since the beginning of my journey....maybe that's why I needed to watch and remember....and to think of all the gifts I found along the way. Who knew?

I am feeling very blessed at the moment.

Love to all,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 15 Dec 10 - 09:18 PM

Revisiting the old grief and fear is how we evaluate where we are. I used to pay attention to the anniversary of the surgeries after my diagnosis, but it has been 10 years. I do still tell people how old I am when they ask, and mention my birthday - I'm glad to be around still to celebrate them.

I'm so glad your friend has come through her surgery so well - I'm sure your presence helped her a lot.

SRS

-----------This thread has been closed due to persistent spamming. Contact Joe Offer if you need it reopened - or start a fresh one. JoeClone---------

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: katlaughing
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 06:20 PM

refresh

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 10 Jan 11 - 09:52 PM

Time for an update!

Tomorrow is my 6 month checkup! I'll have my port flushed, bloodwork done and a visit with my oncologist.

Things have been going fairly well except last week I found a lump. Need I say more? Of course it freaked me out. It's visible which is unusual. I had it checked out today by a local doctor who thinks it is a retentive cyst. Benign. I hope she's right! I have a mammogram scheduled for later this month on the same day I have a checkup with my surgeon. The appointment was made last month before this popped up. Good timing. :)

My hair is really growing! It's darker than it was before...currently a light to medium brown, kinda curly in the back and wavy in the front/sides. And thick!!!!

Jeremiah is now 10 months old, crawling forward and can pull himself up to the standing position. We are teaching him basic signs. So far he has mastered the sign for more. He sometimes will do the sign for fan and hello. Still no teeth. I love our little boy more than words will ever express and so thankful for him. Pete is an incredible daddy too!!!

Love to all,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Ebbie
Date: 11 Jan 11 - 03:22 AM

Michelle, my daughter's twins were still toothless at almost a year. Her doctor assured her that he'd never heard of a kid who remained so.

At age 20 they have the normal complement.

Oh- I just remembered: their sister, two years younger than they, got little or no hair for the longest time. When she finally got some fuzz that hung over her collar in a mullet-like effect her brother took his safety shears and cut her hair. :)

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 11 Jan 11 - 04:08 AM

has brother progressed into the hairdressing field?

thanks for the update, Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jan 11 - 04:26 PM

6 Months!!!

Guess what, Michelle... in 9 1/2 years you'll be celebrating 10 years of cancer free life...

Hey to the little guy, fir me...

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 11 Jan 11 - 06:16 PM

We're home from the hospital. The port flush went well...love that nurse! Everything looks exceptionally good from the tests that were returned quickly. The tumor marker test result will not be in until tomorrow.

And Bobert? LOL. I love you man!

PS. The doctor told me that my anniversary date is from the date of the surgery, not the end of chemo so my 1 year anniversary is coming up with weekend!!! I'm going to start a tradition for that day....not sure just what that will be but I'm sure I'll think of something!!!!

PSS. I have more hair than my doctor now!   ;)

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: maeve
Date: 11 Jan 11 - 06:33 PM

Sounds good, Michelle. I'm keeping track even when I don't post.

Maeve

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Jan 11 - 08:20 PM

Great news all around, Michelle!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: mouldy
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 02:41 AM

Well done and congrats!

Andrea

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 10:00 AM

yah!

love & hugs from sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 01:03 PM

The test results are in! My CA-125 (tumor marker) test result is the lowest it's ever been: 12.4!!!!   HOORAY!!! ****HAPPY DANCE****

Also...that lump has been taken care of! YAY!!!!! :)

Love to all,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: maeve
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 01:05 PM

That's wonderful news, Michelle.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: mouldy
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 01:07 PM

Woop! Woop!

Andrea x

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Little Robyn
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 02:00 PM

Wonderful.
Here's to a much happier and healthier new year.
Robyn, (also clear).

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 Jan 11 - 02:08 PM

YAY Robyn!!!!!

   A healthier new year to you too!!!!! *High Five*

:) Much love,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: mouldy
Date: 13 Jan 11 - 02:39 AM

Well done too, Robyn!

The pair of you are a shining example of what happens more often than we hear about: early detection + medical science + positive energy = good outcome!

Andrea

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 15 Jan 11 - 10:47 PM

Today I celebrated being cancer-free for one year!!!! I wore my teal beads and tiara all day.....enjoying my family and giving thanks for my life.

Love to all who helped me through a very difficult year!!!!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 16 Jan 11 - 01:51 AM

we look forward to many more Teal Beads & Tiara Day observances!

love & hugs

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 28 Jan 11 - 01:19 PM

I got the most beautiful email this morning from Doug Barron, the CEO of the Georgia Ovarian Cancer Alliance. He wrote:
"I want to thank you for the past year. You and your journey with the ups and down being right there for everybody to see has taken such strength and courage. Documenting your treatment has brought an honest insight to the reality that a lot of people never see. And you are smiling in 95% of the pictures, what's up with that? Your never give up though out the process and your commitment is so evident with your following through after your diagnose with Jeremiah. "I have just had major surgery, gone through chemo, and now I am going to be a new mother, okay bring it on". I think you have passed John Wayne on my hero list and he is really close to the top. Congratulations, I am so proud and happy for you and your beautiful family. Mazel Tov"

Sometimes it feels like my cancer adventure was a lifetime ago and sometimes, well, it feels like yesterday. Just when I think I'm going along ok (and really I am), something beautiful and full of love appears and I can't help but just sit and cry. I sure don't feel very strong or that I have courage but it does make me feel really good to know that maybe I've helped someone along the way. GOCA does trainings with oncology students, holds large fundraisers (galas, a walk, stuff with the Atlanta Braves too) and I am very touched that the head of that organization remembers me and took the time to write this morning. :)

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: maeve
Date: 28 Jan 11 - 01:25 PM

That's a lovely letter, Michelle...and well deserved.

Maeve

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 28 Jan 11 - 04:41 PM

Has he seen your videos, or read your Mudcat thread? That's a wonderful letter, it's nice to know that someone else sees the inspiration in this experience.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Jan 11 - 10:03 PM

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bobert}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 28 Jan 11 - 10:42 PM

Maeve...........Thank you!!!!

SRS............One day I hope to meet Doug in person and will share my treasured pink book! He's seen the video and has asked permission to use it for his organization!

Bobert........((((((((Right back atcha my friend)))))))))))

:) Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 28 Jan 11 - 11:09 PM

You do have a unique tool for looking back at your experiences with this thread, online or on paper. You could extract portions of what you wrote and turn it into a book or essay or whatever. And I think you seriously ought to consider doing something with it.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 16 Mar 11 - 05:55 AM

I can hardly believe it but it's time for another check up. I stayed at the House of Care last night as my lab work is scheduled for very early today. Here's hoping and praying for good results.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 16 Mar 11 - 06:40 AM

fingers crossed & sending lots of love & hugs!

sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: maeve
Date: 16 Mar 11 - 09:15 AM

Standing by in Maine, Michelle,

Maeve

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Mar 11 - 12:16 PM

Your cheering section is ready and willing! Keep your chin up!

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 17 Mar 11 - 04:51 AM

refresh

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: maeve
Date: 17 Mar 11 - 07:10 AM

Checking in, Michelle.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 17 Mar 11 - 10:16 AM

I am so incredibly pleased to tell you that my bloodwork was excellent!!! They normally don't have the results back in the same day but yesterday was different!!!

My latest CA-125 is 10!!! My oncologist tells me that it probably will not drop much lower and that any flucuation up to the number 20 is nothing to be concerned with.

They did have some trouble getting my port to work properly...it didn't want to let go of my blood. It was easy enough to remedy (coughing hard) but makes me wonder if it's just getting old and soon will need to be removed. I'm keeping it until it they tell me it has to go for medical reasons.

I celebrated with a good piece of chocolate (a rare treat)!!!

Thanks for your ongoing support....it means so much!!!!

XOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXO

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 17 Mar 11 - 07:01 PM

Hooray for you, dear one! I haven't been around here much lately but it's great to see your good news!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 18 Mar 11 - 11:36 AM

happy dance!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: katlaughing
Date: 18 Mar 11 - 07:24 PM

Whoo-Hoo!!!!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Bobert
Date: 18 Mar 11 - 08:40 PM

Chocolate???

Just like a woman... lol...

Glad that things are movin' along... 'Bout time to ditch the port... Tell yer doc that ol' hillbilly says yer fine and to take the port out.... No, have him call me....

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Mar 11 - 02:20 AM

Michelle,

I have a friend here (my boss' wife) who held onto her port for a long time, for fear she'd need it again. They finally removed it last year, and I think she is now wishing she'd had it removed earlier. There was some damage that may have resulted from keeping it so long. She feels light-headed at times, because the jugular vein is blocked on one side now. It seems to be related to the port and chemo process.

If you can get over the fear (yes, please!) and have it removed, I think you'll find that you're more than fine without it.

Take care, and whateever you decide is fine. But this is just to say that someone in a similar situation gives permission to remove the darned thing. :)

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 19 Mar 11 - 04:21 PM

They have asked me about having the port taken out and I asked to keep it. As long as I have it flushed periodically, they told me it would be fine. I'm keeping it for 2 reasons...first, the obvious. Having the port put in was awful and I don't EVER want to have to repeat that. Second, I still have to go for bloodwork on a regular basis...not just for my CA-125 but for multitudes of other things as well. I've been told that my veins are very small (took 6 tries for my IV) so the port means only 1 stick and they can draw whatever they need easily and relatively pain free....beneficial for both parties. I will call and ask about having it in so long and if it will create any problems like you mentioned. To be honest, I've wondered about that myself but more along the lines of does your body adhere itself to the port? I've heard that it's not bad having it taken out and from others I've heard it's awful. More good stories than bad though.
    The only real reasons I'd like to have it removed are that Jeremiah insists on thumping on it (it's bumpy and sticks out a little bit...YOUCH) and there are some things in yoga I simply can not do because of the angle it moves my chest...other than that, I'm good with it. I can swim and kayak with it...so no problem there.

Bobert....you crack me up. I'll have my oncologists give you a call...they both have a great sense of humor!!! You tell 'em!!!

XOXOXOOXOXO to All!!!

Michelle, Queen of the Ten Thousand!!!!   ;)