BS: Staying on topic in threads.

Subject: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:24 PM

I thought it would be a good thing to start a thread about staying on topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:26 PM

That's only possible when people don't have their own agenda, as so many do.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:27 PM

well I bought some milk at the shop today. Ooops sorry :p

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:28 PM

Well I hope it was skimmed milk and not whole milk which is bad for you.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:31 PM

Exactly. Eggs are good for you unless you shouldn't eat them.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:31 PM

Right onybody whit strays aff topic gets a skelp

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:33 PM

She's back to that sex stuff agin.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:34 PM

"Butt and ben wi' Burke and Hare." I've always liked that, I think it's a nice family kind of image.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:34 PM

Ya wee scunner

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:47 PM

We went shopping to Asda to-day.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 03:47 PM

Butt and Ben flowerpot men?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:01 PM

if I stay on topic and make a stupendous point, people change the subject !!!!!!!! :-)

Trouble is, no topic has definitive boundaries, aaaaand, if you go in for joined-up thinking, then oft the discussion is gwin ter meander from the point of view of those who can't handle more than one point at a time.

I've been told it's called conversation. Some go in for that; others go in for debate. Mebbe the non-music chunk could itself be divided into conversation threads and debate threads.

And

There's

More where that came from - da-da-da-dada

There's more where that came frooooom, [clash.]

    I thang yow.

ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:03 PM

Topic? What's a topic:>)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:05 PM

Well there's the Topic of Capricorn

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:08 PM

Giok, the proper spelling is 'Topic of Cappycorn'. I know, because I recently ate fried mush made from it.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:09 PM

The topical jungles.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:11 PM

If you were in a meeting and people went off topic then that would a waste of time. It wouldn't be allowed to continue if the chairperson was good at the job.

If you start a thread about one specific music topic, say, then it could also be frustrating having to wade through a lot of irrelevant posts to get to what you want.

On some threads half of the fun is when people go off topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:12 PM

Missed out a "be".

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:14 PM

Please! Let's centralize the discission here about going off topic if we could?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:14 PM

And you took the thread off topic . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:15 PM

Thast was for eanjay.

Hey, Gnu, did the doctors give you any topical ointment?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:15 PM

inless you want to pint ot yptos.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:18 PM

Cant be bothered reading back over everything just now so SKELP, I am sure someone deserves it

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:24 PM

If it's what I think it is, I DO, I DO.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:33 PM

Topical application is only skin deep, Bruce. What we really need is a thread on "Threads of a Differing Kidney".


A

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:37 PM

I guess when we meet friends on the street or in homes...we don't sort of stick to one subject once we get engrossed in conversation do we? So I suppose it is a little the same on here....you read and you post by what comes into your head at the time. If particularly focussed then I stay on topic but mostly I say what comes into my head. I am surely not the only one!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:40 PM

Well, after getting all that straight, what do y'all think the topic of this thread should be?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:48 PM

Paranoid schizophrenia?

Or do you think someone might try to stop us?


Shhhhhhhh you know who.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 04:52 PM

Systems Theory?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bill D
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:05 PM

I'm careful about sticking to what *I* think is relevant to the topic...I hope no one is suggesting I should limit myself to what others think as well...☺

(friend of mine got a traffic ticket. Officer asked him - "Didn't you see that 'One Way' sign?"

"Gee, officer", he replied, "I was only going one way.")







(how'm I doin?)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:07 PM

Iconoclastic aberations in subliminal applications of messages to do with diacritical subnormalities in the print media?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:08 PM

TRY to stay on track, Bill, PLEASE!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:10 PM

Only Leftists would try to fence me in. What WOULD Jesus do in this situation. You racist bigots! Take that! I wonder if this thread will reach 50 trillion posts??? Hmmm? If it Does maybe Winona would give ME a tumble. So there, Little Chicken Hawk. And yer pet Ape dick too. TOO? the square root of two? Have they ever reached the end of that root? And what about square circles? If they're real then maybe, just maybe crop circles are real. Well, I mean they ARE real but maybe they ARE made by space critters who lost their navigational instruments. And that Is kinda what this is all about, isn't it? Instruments? And IF so then maybe this post should have gone above the line! Personally I LIKE the Taylor the best. I used to serenade Wendy Taylor on my Taylor! What a coincidence. But things didn't work out for us as she was pretty Left leaning, if you know what I mean. She really cramped my style. She was always boxing me in. Only leftists would try to fence me in. What would Jesus do in this situation? To be continued in other threads....

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Sorcha
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:10 PM

Pizza, anyone?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:12 PM

Hold the mayo . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:15 PM

I think everyone should take a lesson from Slag. See how well he is focussed?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:16 PM

Here are three Topics to choose from.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bill D
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:30 PM

I'm on track...it just happens to be a monorail.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:34 PM

Well if the Topic is as those shown above, then I'll stick with it!!

TOPIC!! A hazelnut in every bite!


Of course, if you mean keeping to one subject.... ever tried knitting fog in a traditional Fairisle pattern?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jack Blandiver
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:34 PM

Does anyone know the names of the seven hundred elves?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:34 PM

Is the topic now trains? OK. Trains it is.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: JennieG
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:34 PM

Don't derail, Bill......it's a narrow track.

Speaking of narrow tracks, did I tell you about my last walk in the bush?

To be continued..........

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:35 PM

Topic bars used to be advertised with a Jingle that went.
What has a hazel nut in every bite....TOPIC♫♪

Thus giving rise to the joke.



Q. What has a hazelnut in every bite?

A. Squirrel shit.




Boom boom.



Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:43 PM

Drum roll. So, now the topic is drum rolls. Remember, stay on topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:45 PM

You're telling paradiddles

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bill D
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:49 PM

"A topic a day keeps the doctrine away"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:50 PM

Paradiddles.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:50 PM

Bill, Bill, Bill, . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:55 PM

Ah, finally a topic dear to my heart.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 05:58 PM

Welcome back, Ebbie! Missed you bunches.

ummm......sorry about the thread drift.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 06:11 PM

Flo was fond of Ebenezer
"Eb" for short she called her beau.
Talk of the Tides of Love, Great Caesar!
You should have seen them, Eb and Flo.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 06:21 PM

Hey, diddle diddle

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 06:23 PM

Oy!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 06:35 PM

Mary bought a little bear to eat her bacon rind
And everywhere that Mary went, you saw her bear behind.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 06:37 PM

MacKenzie SKELP

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Sorcha
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 08:11 PM

Pizza all 'round.....
|_____|   |_____| |______|

NO anchovies. I don't DO anchovies.
Bring yer own beer.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 08:51 PM

Waht's this all about, then?


A

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 08:59 PM

who knows?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 09:15 PM

I need a topicgraphical map. Paradittles? Pair of dice? Paradise? Bartlet pears. Uh, now how close are we to 50 trillion?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 09:20 PM

LH, if Chongo happens to read this thread, please tell him I was only kidding about him being the pet. It's the early Bonobo influence, kinda like dyslexia only worse.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 09:35 PM

Hi Janie! (Now backa to the topic.)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 26 Jan 08 - 10:34 PM

Hey-
don't complain. At last we have a thread where BB and Teribus aren';t ganging up on Bobert (or vice versa)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: rangeroger
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 12:40 AM

If you are bored with the topic, does it then become a topical anesthetic?

rr

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:42 AM

The effects of the anaesthetic from five operations over two years was devastating at that time of my life. I had been on track to run the London Marathon and could run about 14 miles without problem. Then it all started and five ops later I had problems getting breath when I ran.
Who said I was off topic????? Anaesthetic was mentioned wasn't it?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:50 AM

My turn to do a turn.

It's spelt 'focused', not 'focussed', ta- taaaaaaaaaaaa ching.

And it's my claim th't that is on topic.

(But that's a topic in itself. )

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 08:11 AM

autolycus...focused or focussed as can be seen from this definition in 'Chambers Dictionary online' approx two thirds of the way down and in brackets...............I did go to one of those schools you know where one is expected to present with good Queens English. LOL
focus noun (focuses or foci) 1 the point at which rays of light or sound waves converge or appear to diverge. 2 optics focal point 1. 3 a the condition in which an image is sharp • The picture is in focus; b the state of an instrument producing this image • The telescope is in focus • These binoculars are out of focus. 4 geol in seismology: the location of the centre of an earthquake, where the subterranean fracture takes place and from which the elastic waves radiate outward. See also epicentre. 5 a centre of interest or attention. 6 special attention paid to something • a shift of focus. 7 pathol the main site of an infection. 8 geom a point associated with a conic section where the distance between it and any point on the curve is a fixed ratio (the eccentricity 4) to the distance between that point and a line (the directrix). verb (focused, focusing; focussed, focussing) 1 tr & intr to bring or be brought into focus; to meet or make something meet or converge at a focus. 2 to adjust the thickness of the lens of (the eye) or to move the lens of (an optical instrument) so as to obtain the sharpest possible image of a particular object. 3 to cause (electron beams) to converge or diverge by varying the voltage or current that controls the magnetic or electric fields through which they pass. 4 (often focus something on something) tr & intr to concentrate (one's attention, etc) on it • focused her energies on the problem • focused on the problem.

Anyway to get back to the thread...Dictionaries are great things aren't they.....I read one all the way through....hard to understand the story but some lovely words used!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 08:28 AM

And if you're looking for sympathy, you'll find it in there too.
Somewhere between shit and syphilis.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bill D
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 10:10 AM

Didja hear about the three brothers in Texas who inherited a cattle ranch from their father?
They decided to run it as a team...sort of a family business: but they wanted a name that would reflect the history and relevance of their unique enterprise.

After great deliberation, they decided to call it:


FOCUS RANCH




because.....












that's where the son's raise meat




(this once won a prize as one of the best puns of all time)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 10:11 AM

I think its better that its closer one then the other in a rudimentary way. I am seeing that a lot of this thread is rudimentary,

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 12:18 PM

The way i heard it about dictionaries,

The plot's a bit obscure, but they do explain every word.


Chamber's is wrong, of course. They just haven't got the balls to stand up to misspellers. They just record.:-)

I lked groucho saying to a uni graduate of the opposite sexual persuasion ro myself, who was sitting on Zeppo's lap (Groucho being his father in the film),

Young lady, do you mind standing up so I can see the son rise?

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 12:28 PM

Buncha the boys would go into a back-country store and ask the young woman who worked there for a loaf of raisin bread. This was kept on the top shelf, and to get it she had to turn her back on the boys and do a lot of stretching and the resulting view was terrific.

Finally, after getting eight or ten loaves down for eight or ten of the loafers, she turned to an old fella who'd been patiently waiting and asked, "Well? Is your's raisin too?"

"No," he responded, "but it's twitchin' a might."

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 12:37 PM

What the focus the point of this thread?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 12:42 PM

By Jove, I think he's got it!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bert
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 12:52 PM

As Bill said, staying on topic is a one way street.

I remember driving the wrong way down a one way street in Germany. I thought that Einbahnstrasse was the name of the road.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Stringsinger
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 01:02 PM

Straying off topic is creative not rigid. The topic can't be defined so precisely by the
topic Dictator. Who is the arbiter who can judge whether the topic is off or not?

Mudcat is about Free Speech. It's one of the last places for democracy left on the net.
I see loose connections in topics that supposedly stray.

Frank

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 01:06 PM

I am glad to see that so many folks here have stayed on the topic of this thread. Thanks to both of you.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 01:46 PM

People may cry "Peas! Peas!" but there are no peas. The entree has actually begun!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:04 PM

Ah yes...To-pic or not To-pic. THAT is the question...

                                    STAYIN' ON TOPIC(A Rap Song, soon to be in theatre's everywhere)

                     Stayin' on topic, you know you want to drop it,
                     Yo yer words are flowin, ya wanna keep it goin'
                     Yeah you should be listenin', instead of kinda quislin'
                     Politician in yer pocket, how ya gonna stop it?

                     You wanna be a hero, 'stead yer battin' zero
                     Yer head is up like Nero, fiddlin' in the mirror,
                     Topic's like a gender, you wanna be a bender,
                     Get yerself a Fender, and Rockit all night long.....

O.K. O.K. O.K. Enough already! You don't think I'm INSANE do you(to be read with a British accent, usually spoken before the man/maniac starts to do some slicin' and dicein')

"Everybody's talkin' at me..." Fred Neil
"Say the secret word and the duck will come down and give you $100..."-Groucho Marx
"I did not have sex with that woman..."- Bill Clinton
"Weapons of mass destruction" - former President Bush(Soon kids. Soon. Hopefully in time. Did HE stay on topic? HA HA HA HA HA...)

O.K. Enough about me. NOW Mudcatmeisters. The topical question of the day is...
In which song did Bruce Murdoch use the word "quisling?"
The prize is the comfort of knowing...
Topicly yours...bob

Peace: I want to see the new RAMBO. Are ya with me?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:07 PM

Bob, I'm startin' to worry about you . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:18 PM

Peace: Listen. It'll be a great time. First we go to see Rambo. Then we go out for a few brewski's and a pizza! Then, we invade the U.S. !!!...bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:21 PM

What kind of pizza?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:25 PM

Peace: Your choice. And it's on me...bob

" I'd like 4000 sandwiches to go please..." Woody Allen-"Bananas"(I think)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:26 PM

Lots of anchovies and garlic. LOTS. Hey, do we need passports when we invade the US?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:42 PM

Don't be ridiculous.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:44 PM

Anchovies? Lots of Anchovies?

Oh! Puleeezzzzzz. Quick, alert the Border Patrol!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Stringsinger
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:46 PM

Glad to see that the posts are on topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:48 PM

It's very difficult keeping these threads on topic. Y'all gotta help out as best you can, ya know? Jeeze . . . .

Anchovy and garlic pizza is/are IT!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 02:52 PM

Stuffed peppers are great when you use anchovy and garlic.

I'm trying really hard here. Is it on topic because I've mentioned anchovies and garlic or is it off topic because I've mentioned stuffed peppers?

I haven't quite grasped the rules yet!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:03 PM

Ah the smell of anchovies, and well seasoned leather.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:10 PM

"well seasoned leather thwacking on willow" soon be cricket season !! Howzat

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:11 PM

"I'm trying really hard here. Is it on topic because I've mentioned anchovies and garlic or is it off topic because I've mentioned stuffed peppers?"

Well, yes and no, eanjay. As Giok said, anchovies and leather . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:23 PM

Those plastic bicycle saddles nowadays just aren't the same.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:29 PM

And now a word from our sponsor.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:32 PM

Peace & Posse: Sure anchovies are great. Did I ever give you my recipe for "40-clove garlic chicken?" Prepare chicken for roasting(a bit of Cajun spice & BBQ sauce)). Circle the chicken with 40 cloves of garlic with the peels left on. They turn into a spread for warm bread and your favorite salad. Add some cool ones. Instant party. A sure-fire way to find out which of your guests are vampires.
Then a recipe for German Chocolate Cheese Cake: Virst, you vill occupy a kitchen! Zen you vill be asked to show your papers to obtain..."

Passport? After seeing Rambo, we won't need one. THEY will need one...

Topics and threads are like Jazz, you start with the head/melody and everybody does their inversions and variations..."The fat jazz that a cat blows wails long after he's cut out..." Lord Buckley, who would have dug the boppinest, baddest, coolest anchovies on this here sphere... :0) bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:43 PM

HE'S GOT IT! This thread is about Buckley's Cough Syrup.

THANK YOU, Bob.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:51 PM

Yer Welcome...

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:53 PM

What about

THE NAZ !!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:54 PM

The problem with anchovies is having to put something that looks like that in your mouth - on a pizza, they remind me of fox scat on the trail.

Of course, anything is good if you put enough garlic on it....

Is there garlic in Buckley's cough syrup?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:57 PM

GOOD question, Janie.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 03:59 PM

GARLIC    GARLIC yuch phewwwwwww quick someone fetch me a wooden stake. Ooops wait a mo its not meant to be the vampire with the stake ok strike that order me a steak deffinately NO garlic of course i want it rare.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:01 PM

She's got it. Rare garlic on a stake with anchovies and some Buckley's as a chaser.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:05 PM

I wanna know if Buckley's thingy is available in the UK?; whether it comes with a Topic?; why did Lord Buckley have to die so soon?; did he take the syrup?; and how do you thread your way out?

or is it all like the Mama bear and Daddy Bear who had a baby son who was hairless, so they called him Thread.


(No hurry - i have time.)

   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:05 PM

It's not a vegetarian steak-away is it

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:13 PM

Vegetarian all the way--made from wood.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:15 PM

Rare stakes.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:15 PM

He opined

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:23 PM

Did knot!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:29 PM

Silly me. I thought y'all was talkin' about rare snakes.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:32 PM

I ain't gonna say what that looks like. Nope. Not at all.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:33 PM

. . . but it should be labelled XXXX.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 04:46 PM

Lord Buckley had the riff down. He was old man riffer.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 05:34 PM

"And the NAZ said, "DIG INFINITY! And they DUG it!...'-Lord Buckley

Did you bring any weapons with the anchovies? Then you ain't changin' nuthin'...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M1KiXWWTxg&feature=related


Posing the observation that "staying on topic' for some, means staying on MY TOPIC! Proof that "rowing the boat in the same direction", or "being on the same page" can have completely different meanings depending on which boat or page you are on...

"And you're right from your side, and I'm right from mine..."-Dylan
"First we take Manhattan, then we take Berlin..." -Leonard Cohen

And as we elect "another President" for "real change" do yas think there will be no more war, poverty, etc.?

"We all have inner demons to conquer. What are they Sifu? Fear, Hatred and Anger, if we can do this, a life of one day is a triumph. otherwise our lifetime is a tragedy..." (para: Sifu to a young Bruce Lee, from Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story)

"I certainly hope that my book will help everyone to enjoy this wonderful game..."-Bobby Fischer, from "Bobby Fischer Teaches Chess" Did he go off topic? Or was he always on topic, one way or the other?

I checked to see if a Pizza Place would deliver to Burma. No Go...bob

p.s. Did I stay on topic? In my own strange way, I hope so...

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 05:40 PM

I get the feeling that somebody isn't taking this topic seriously!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 05:41 PM

Wait! I'm starting to understand what the topic of this thread is!

Look at the hints: garlic, anchovies, bicycle seats, two-headed snakes, skim milk, eggs, raisin bread, peas. The topic is obviously "Things Keith Richards has snorted!"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 05:43 PM

Close laddie very close

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:08 PM

Keith Richards! "And each pirate only ever votes for hisself..."The code(topic) is the law! Right on topic!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EnOjGuQkNs
See. That first clown went off topic, and look what happened to him!
Ya just don't do that when 'ol Keith has a pistol in his hand...
Even after snortin' all dem anchovies while at sea, he can still shoot straight. And who among us can say the same?
bob

Oh yeah. Way back up the thread: Paradiddles. Love 'em. But not on my pizza. Rather practice my konokol: TA KI TA/TA KA DI MI TA KI TA...from India, lotsa bicycles there. With seats. Made of leather...Right on topic....
Not take this topic/thread seriously? PSHAW... Are you callin' me a seriously?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:28 PM

I'm not sure if Keith has ever snorted a paradiddle, but since the list of things Keith hasn't snorted is way shorter than the list of things he has, it's not unlikely.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:37 PM

I know a guy who's girlfriend's hairdresser's cousin's brother-in-law's best friend once saw Keith Richards snort himself. Turned himself inside out, kept snorting, and disappeared completely.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:43 PM

Aw, shit. What happened to the anchovies?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:46 PM

anchovies
anchovies
. garlic .
anchovies

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:46 PM

Well, yes and no, eanjay.

At least I'm making some progress!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:47 PM

I agree with you for the most part.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:50 PM

"Chamber's is wrong, of course. They just haven't got the balls to stand up to misspellers. They just record.:-)"

No... Chambers is RIGHT. Just as fo'c's'le is accurate for forecastle, focussed is accurate for folk cussed, only he left the "'" out as it should read "fo'cussed".   That's cussed hard to explain to you folks and folkies and I also must admit that the grammatical construction is awkward to say the least but, Uh, what were we talking about?

Peace, Bob! We surrender! Keep your garlic and anchovy breath at home....PUH-LEEEZE!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 07:55 PM

There SHOULD be roads on the ocean floor.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 08:45 PM

During storm surges there often are.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 08:57 PM

Slag: Join us! You too can be loved by cats and feared by vampires...Try it. You'll like it!
Since the topic of staying on topic has transmogrefied to roads on the ocean floor, man would that be something to see. Thousands of years go by, sunken ships, Atlantis?
Driving to Europe in Jeeps. The ocean contained in one HUGE water bottle, floating over the earth. Where is Salvador Dali when you need him?
You might laugh, but it's simple threads like this that are opening new worlds of communication by which we may be able to save ourselves from destruction. We can talk and open dialogues never before seen in the history of mankind. You can be here on Mudcat, but there is no reason you cannot communicate with world leaders through threads and blogs. Diseases? What if some herbalist in China can reveal his discoveries to a Doctor at Johns Hopkins, who connects with a financier who is willing to fund untried ways to cure Cancer?
Crash of the U.S. Economy? The reason? FEAR. We live in abundance. It is our THOUGHTS of loss that create panic, where there should be none.
Convince 1 billion people to focus their thoughts(stay on topic) that world hunger can no longer be tolerated, and that would be fixed in a week.
Albert Einstein once posed the question," Is this an abundant Universe? A question that can only have one answer. Thereby supporting the fact that we create our own reality...
My old friend Gerry Frechette and I used to talk about God back in High School. And one night we came to the conclusion that it might be possible that mankind is merely cells and microbes in the bloodstream of a larger human, and/or organism. That which we call God.(As above, so below) And this would continue infinitely. Or until, as Paramahansa Yogananda used to say, "We all return to the Cosmic Mother."
Peace & Blessings to you all...OM
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on Top Picks in threads.
From: Severn
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 08:59 PM

"Somewhere over the Rambo
Skies are blue
Birds fly over the Rambo
Why the hell don't you....."

(or however that movie theme song goes. I'm waiting for the Broadway Musical, myself)


My topic of the moment is the Topic Of "Can't, Sir"
Dey tol' me ah should get on Chemo. Turns out they was talkin' 'bout mah singin'! Dey tol' me de best cure fo' me would hangin' upside down in a barn, like tobacco. Only that old tattletale, Time, will tell....

I got some good recordings off Topic. They put out some good albums. Nothing by Topic Shaker, that dead Rap scallion guy, though....

Some like the Top Picks, but I root for the guys that go undrafted...

I know that over here we have topics, but over in the UK, I thought they had subjects, God Save The Queen.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 27 Jan 08 - 09:23 PM

Find the Blue Buddha...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glKPFZNMPTY&feature=related

bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 01:37 AM

"Anchovy,anchovy,they've all got it anchovy!!!"

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: open mike
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 03:22 AM

wow--what stream-of-consciousness....




blather.....


i was afraid someone was chiding me for my oft-off-topic
posts, but i see there are others much more masterful
at this art

irrelevant


irreverant



i'll take mine with pesto
please
thank you
you're welcome

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Newport Boy
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 05:28 AM

For topic drift, I like the old postcard joke:

Two drunks with a stadium in the background.

First Drunk: Ish thish Wembley?

Second Drunk: No, itsh Thursday.

First Drunk: Sho am I. Let'sh have another one.

Phil

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 06:03 AM

I'm not as thunk as some drinkle peep I am.
Merely under the affluence of incahol.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 07:06 AM

The Topics is the name given to one of Aristotle's six standard works on logic, collectively known as the Organon. The Topics was written as a textbook on how to argue successfully. Topoi are basic principles designed to help a disputant win arguments.

I thought this (from Wikipedia) might help me .......... but I suppose it isn't on topic:-)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 07:35 AM

Organon was a pharmaceutical company who manufactured contraceptive pills about 20 years ago.... made laugh hysterically every time I heard that Kate Bush song that starts 'I'm still dreaming of Organon'.....

Wasn't Topoi in 'Fiddler on the Roof'?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 07:43 AM

Can contraceptive pills be taken on an empty stomach or would you need to eat some anchovies first?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 08:03 AM

Sounds like a case for the three wise men from the oestrogen.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 08:06 AM

Anchovies.

They are your friends. Join them. Do not be afeared.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 08:53 AM

That's the Dorset County motto nearly... 'who's afear'd'

It comes with a picture of a big red dragon. No anchovies.

The Romans ate a lot of anchovies. Dorset was invaded by Vespasian's army, presumably with a lot of anchovies.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 09:40 AM

Don't know about the anchovies but we could have a garlic singaround just for an experiment. There's a lot of talk about it in the Music Threads section and I'm not sure yet what a garlic song sung by a non garlic singer would be about though unless it would be an anti-garlic attack thing and no doubt the non-garlickers want to subdue the trend.

Furthermore, I think it's completely unfair to single out garlic eaters who might otherwise enjoy singing about garlic, and they are most likely more knowledgable anyhow being as they like to have it on cereal, pancakes and just about anything really. It's important to sing from the heart and they say garlic is good for it, so therefore I ask: Who can carry a tune better, the Garlickers or the Non-Garlickers??

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 10:02 AM

Jokes. We need parrot jokes.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 10:11 AM

Oh the big ship sails on the alley allium♪
The alley allium, The alley allium
The big ship sails on the alley allium
On the last day of September.

Clove me Tender ♫

Garlic Songs?

G

A Norwegian Blue Anchovy perhaps?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 11:20 AM

Just for you PEACE. This was written by me many years ago and has been used in similar jokes since....some of them still get back to me in corrupted form.
                   THE POWER OF PRAYER.(or The Wayward Parrot)

Mrs Brown had a wayward parrot,
A pretty young thing called Flo.
Who was always swearing and talking
In sexual innuendo!

She went for tea with the Pastor,
One Sunday evening last year.
Where she saw his old porrot praying,
Which gave her a clever idea.

She asked the Pastor at tea time,
"Can I borrow your old parrot Rex,
To try to influence my parrot Flo.
Who talks of nothing but sex?"

She took Rex home the same evening,
He prayed all the way in the car.
She was so impressed by the old bird,
Whose manners outshone Flos by far.

But when she put Rex in Flos cage,
She realised her greatest fears.
Flo said "Do you want some Rex"? and Rex said
I've been praying for this for years!!!!!

Bruce..if you want some more joke poetry..pm me. Best wishes, Mike.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 11:44 AM

So this parrot is sitting in his cage, and in a few weeks, he begins shouting, "I'm bored! I'm bored! His owner buys him some toys, but the bird rejects everything. Frustrated that everytime he passes the bird, the bird keeps shouting, I'm bored!
Hoping to communicate, his owner finally asks him. All Right! What do you want?!
The parrot says, "A Pet!" So the owner goes out and buys him an anchovie for a pet. The bird immediately calms down and begins to talk to the anchovie while the owner isn't around.
They decide that they will form a band. The parrot wants to go Folk. The anchovie wants to Rock. The anchovie can sing and write, but the parrot only knows how to play the guitar, but he's pretty good.
Soon the anchovie shouts out. "Listen. I've written an album, it's from the heart and it's about how I feel, I want to call it "Slippery when Wet." Jealous at the anchovies creativity, the parrot begins to argue. "That's the most ridiculous title for an album that I have ever heard." It won't get any airplay. We need to copy the humans and come up with something like Dylan, or Gordon Lightfoot.
So an insane argument erupts with the parrot and the anchovie yelling at each other, the parrot shouting Folk!. The anchovie Rock!
This turns into a fight with feathers everywhere, and when the owner comes home, the parrot is alone in the cage with a smile on his face.
The owner asks the parrot "Where's the anchovie that I got you for a pet?"
The parrot says nothing.
The owner begins yelling at the parrot, "What happened to the anchovie?"
The parrot breaks down, and for the first time begins to talk to the owner and tells him the whole story.
The parrot tells him "Look, he wanted to Rock and I was into Folk, and, and, he had written this Rock album with a stupid title I didn't like, and I was willing to compromise, but he wouldn't listen. I had this great name for the group, but he didn't like it, so we fought and, and, ..."
The owner asks the parrot, what was the name you came up with?
The parrot tearfully blurts out, "Bon Chovie", then I ate him, boo hoo hoo....
There there, the owner responds, what's done is done.
Hey, the owner says, now that you have started to talk, how about a slice of nice hot garlic pizza? The parrot takes his first bite and says to the owner, "you know what this would have been great with...?" The owner replies, "Pepperoni?".
bob
And so the moral of the story is "one man's Bon-Chovie is another man's Pepperoni," Or you could always go for Chinese...

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 11:47 AM

Thank you both. GS, that is a great song. THANK you. It should be a



LYRIC ADD

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 01:46 PM

Milk has so much Bovine Growth hormone added that children who drink it daily do in fact ract to the growth hormone in musch the same way as HGH

Sadly it causes the cows much pain and puss producing infections on their teats. Then they up the antibiotic in the cows which beef cattle get routinely since it does cause early maturity to full weight saving a week on cattle feed by slaughter time.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 01:51 PM

Whilst we are on the subject of sheep....if you have trouble sleeping it is recommended that you count sheep.....the best possible way of doing this is counting their legs and dividing by four.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 01:53 PM

Parrot jokes as requested - so must be on topic.

Two friends meet. One's looking very down and the other asks what's wrong.

It's my parrot.

What's the matter with it.

It's stopped talking.

Well, you see, parrots are like people. They like a change of surroundings from time to time. Why don't you move the stuff in his cage - see if that cheers him up.

His friend says he'll give it a go.

They meet again a coupla weeks later, but the parrot-owner looks worse.

Has something happened - you look terrible.

It's the parrot.

What now?

it's dead.

Dead?! Whay, what happened?

He fell off his perch.

Ah, so you moved the furniture in his cage. Did that at least get him to talk.

Oh yes, he said, "Who moved me flaming ladder !!?"


   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:04 PM

A postal carrier is working on a new beat. He comes to a garden gate marked BEWARE OF THE PARROT! He looks down the garden and, sure enough, there's a parrot sitting on its perch. He has a little chuckle to himself at the sign and the parrot there on its perch. The mailman opens the gate and walks into the garden. He gets as far as the parrot's perch, when suddenly, it calls out: "REX, ATTACK!"

Polynesia: Memory loss in parrots.

Chirpes: A canarial disease...no tweetment.

Polygram Records, Warner Brothers and Keebler: New company will be called Poly-Warner-Cracker.


I'll get me coat

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:15 PM

OK. Thanks to you all for the parrot jokes. Now, could we PLEEZE get back to the thread topic?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:16 PM

This IS the thread about the proper way to stuff a chesterfield, isn't it?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Janie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:21 PM

Jaysus, Peace.

Now look what you've started.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:26 PM

Now, could we PLEEZE get back to the thread topic?

Yes, of course, I don't know what it is though!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:31 PM

I've looked up stuffing Chesterfields and I can find stuffing and I can find Chesterfield. Do I just put the two together?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:34 PM

......... or will the Chesterfield go off?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:35 PM

I think so. This is said to be a three seater. So why does it look like a two seater? AND, what is it stuffed with?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:36 PM

I GOT IT thanks to y'all. It's stuffed with, yes, you guessed it, ANCHOVIES!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:39 PM

But it doesn't seem to have gone off - maybe they are swimming around in it!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:42 PM

If you say so, eanjay, if you say so . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:51 PM

Well, I can't see any swimming going on.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:52 PM

I smelt that

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:53 PM

This contains anchovies, but it would take a lot of it to stuff Chesterfield

Unless you mean these , and wouldn't it make them taste odd, and impossible to light?

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 02:58 PM

Off the thread topic for a sec, seeing the Chesterfield cigarette packages really brought back some memories. My best friend's dad smoked them, back some 50 years or so. Blast from the past. Thank you.

Donuel, you and Severn gotta get together at some point. He's another with the puns . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 03:11 PM

Peace...I never met anyone who smoked cigarette packages..that's amazing and so much cheaper than the actual cigarettes. You can find plenty of discarded packages at no cost. Your friends dad showed a lot of ingenuity but how do you smoke them?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 03:45 PM

I KNEW that once Peace starts a thread, it would turn into this. A simple, peaceful, dialogue & negotiation between friends, all of whom have similar likes and interests. Being mature individuals, I have taken the liberty of providing you this brief clip of what these discussions MIGHT be like if we were to face each other in person...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMl4kYmkx94&feature=bz301
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 03:51 PM

Dude!!!!! Excellent.

ROTFLMFAO

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 06:15 PM

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 07:44 PM

WHAT!!! You DARE to disagree with me??

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 08:11 PM

Finally- there is a thread that is a natural for a couple of questions I have long had.

No.1: Why is genital herpes incurable? (FYI, I do not have herpes.)

No.2: Why is radioactivity non-neutralizable?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 09:20 PM

Here is an elegant answer to your queston #1, Ebbie.

Re: Why can't doctors find cures for viruses such as Herpes, AIDS, etc?
Date: Fri May 28 09:59:44 1999
Posted By: Brian Foley, Post-doc/Fellow Molecular Genetics
Area of science: Virology
ID: 927736361.Vi Message:


        First of all, don't say we "can't" find a cure. We
haven't yet found a real cure, but we are still working on
it.
        It is relatively easy to cure bacterial infections
because bacteria are very different from humans, so there
are many things that can affect bacteria that don't affect
the human. There are thousands of ways to kill any living
thing, but the trick when one thing is living inside another
one, is to kill the thing inside, without killing the host.
The more different the thing inside is from the host, the
easier it is to find something that will kill the infecting
species, but not the host.

        Viruses not only live inside the human body, but
they also live inside the human cells. Almost all bacteria
that cause problems for people live inside the body, but
outside the human cells. Relatively large molecules, like
the penicillin molecule, can get into the bloodstream,
either through the digestive system, or by injecting it right
into the blood. But most large molecules cannot cross the
cell membrane and get into cells.

        On top of that, viruses are very simple organisms
which use the host cells to replicate. They don't have
their own metabolism. The host immune system can recognize
infected cells and kill the whole infected cell. It can
also recognize the free virus moving between cells and kill
the virus. But the immune system is much more complex and
amazing than any drug or method we can yet design.

        Because of all this, the best way we have to fight
viruses, is to use vaccines to prepare the host's own immune
system to fight the virus. Smallpox, polio, rabies, and many
other viruses have been controlled by good vaccines. Viruses
which change very quickly, such as the common cold viruses,
the human influenza virus, and HIV, are more difficult to
create a good vaccine for.

Brian Foley
HIV Database

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 09:47 PM

Why, I ask you? Why? Why did it have to be Bob? He deserved better. Why?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 10:47 PM

I don't know either, Rap. But I am sorry.

Another question: Did the Black Death, the Bubonic Plague of 1347-1451, hit the North American continent?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 11:19 PM

Did the Black Death, the Bubonic Plague of 1347-1451, hit the North American continent?

No. It wanted to hit the North American continent but, hey, do you realize how big the North American continent is? It's huge! To hit it in any meaningful way, you'd need a hammer so big that nobody could lift it. Not even Arnold Sharsenegger Schwaresneger the guy who's governor of California. Such a hammer would be so big it would use up the world's entire supply of iron ore and then how would they ever make Toyotas?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Janie
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 11:39 PM

Amos simply refers to him as the Governator. Much easier to spell.

I'd guess not, Ebbie. It seemed to have moved from Asia on rats bearing infected fleas aboard ships. Sure did knock back the population of Europe a bit.

At least, I've never seen any reference to anchovy fleas being responsible.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 28 Jan 08 - 11:55 PM

HITLER!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 12:00 AM

Multiple Choice. Select the correct answer:

Which item does not belong in this list.

A) Herpes

B) Aides

C) Syphilis

D) Property in Lakeport CA

The answer is, of course, C) You can get rid of it.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 01:53 AM

But of course you can give them to someone else!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 01:56 AM

Gonervertor

Goverertoer

Gonvernater

Governtr

oh, yeh, reaaaaallllllyyyy eanjay to spell. Ta.


Easier to spell than aanchonav - daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamnnn

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 02:20 AM

"Aides"

Stop payment. My guess you'll be rid of them right quick.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: JennieG
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:51 AM

Then you would be unaided, Ebbie!

Which is different to bandaided.

Which is what you get when lots of people come together to raise money for a band.

It can get sticky though.

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 05:15 AM

Where does my lap go when I stand up?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 05:35 AM

Wasn't Monica Lewinsky an aide?

No I'm not confusing her with 'marital aids', nor since someone mentioned Arnie, martial arts.

Crush a few Scandinavian rodents add some sugar and stir, lemming aid?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 08:29 AM

I did that once, made lemonade that way. But I just was too tired to stir, so I fell asleep on the couch instead. Didn't stir for eight or nine hours.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 09:15 AM

Another stirring account of someone sleeping!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 12:41 PM

Cho-vy

Or an-cho-vy

THAT

is the question


    Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 12:44 PM

Anne Chiovey nice lassie but there wis somethin fishy aboot her family

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 12:52 PM

Did you ever notice that really demented people

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 02:36 PM

That's staying on-topic. Peace?

Oh, Peace.

Peace, kima sabby.

   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 02:53 PM

Auto, you're absolutely right.

OK. Back to the topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 03:06 PM

Maxwellton's braes are bonnie, where early fa's the dew
It was there that Annie Chovey, gi'ed me her promise true

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 03:15 PM

The promise of Anne Chovey is too much to bear,
I think I'll take my folksongs..and sing them elsewhere.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bill D
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 03:23 PM

I'm not sure I want what Anniechovie has to offer.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:07 PM

Annechovey the artist lived under the seas,
Her artworks acknowledged from New York to Greece.
A tasty young lady, or so I've heard tell.
Looks thoroughly edible...but OH what a smell!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:15 PM

Can't think of anchovies without thinking of my favourite summer salads which never fails to bring back memories of shady lunches in Province'

Salade Nicoise

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:18 PM

That sounds delicious. Followed with anchovy ice cream and fresh mint leaves, why, what more could a person ask? (OK, maybe garlic tea, but sometimes it's difficult to get."

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:23 PM

LOL Peace - don't knock 'til you've tried it

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:26 PM

but hold the mint!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:31 PM

"I may be wonderful" (C in a circle. grouco) but if this isn't another thread drift, then I'm overtired. 'night all.


   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:41 PM

ail ail ail ail ail I like you verry much
Si si si si si I think you smell. ♫♪

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:43 PM

the ultimate 'buttie'

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Leadfingers
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:52 PM

Is a 200th post On or Off Topic ??

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:56 PM

Time you went for a walk Terry

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 04:58 PM

Actually, Leadfingers, that IS the topic. The real topic of this thread, before it was hijacked by ne'er-do-wells, is numbers. We were using anchovies to make keeping track easier, but then trying to count the legs on those little suckers was becoming a real chore.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 05:01 PM

Anchovy Tea

Open a tin of achovies.
Put some in a teapot.
Pour rapidly boiling water over them.
Seep for 20 minutes.
Pour into teacups and enjoy!

(Garnish with a clove of garlic for a festive touch.)


This recipe has been handed down in my family for generations, from mother to daughter. No one has made it up recently, though. If you make it up please let everyone know how it tastes. Thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 05:11 PM

Philistine. No milk? Cream? Sugar?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 05:14 PM

now get your taste buds round this!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 06:16 PM

If anchovy paste is made from squashed anchovies, and tomato paste is made from squashed tomatoes, is library paste made from squashed libraries?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 06:24 PM

And is wallpaper paste made from wallpaper? or is toothpaste made from teeth?.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 06:28 PM

And why are there never any fingers left, by the time the finger bowl gets to me.
Were they all eaten at the finger buffet?

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 06:50 PM

I suppose everything is going DIGITal now John so you should never go hungry.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 07:04 PM

Georgian Silver, are you a silver smith?

I splled gouache varnish on my hands 2 days ago and it still won;t wash off.

Dinner still isn't ready.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 07:12 PM

And now, dancing anchovies!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0ImgssNloY

Why Peace. Hijacked? Ne'er do wells? These wonderful people are merely elaborating on the miriad possibilities of YOUR suggested topic. I remember when you were a FUN GUY! Whappened?
Otherwise, if we all ONLY commented on the Subject: RE: Staying on topic in threads. What SHOULD we have said? Yes. No. Maybe?

And another thing... Peace. Were we ever married?

bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 07:18 PM

Uh, I don't think you and I ever tied the knot, Bob. Sorry. Hope you're not offended. However, there were some wild parties. Gawd. Now I got THIS to worry about.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 07:51 PM

Party? Did you say party? You mean you don't remember that party we went to when you pledged your undying LOVE? After the copius amounts of liquid refreshment? Sherbrooke St. 1970. Draft at ten cents a glass? Think back, it started when you dressed up in that psycho multicolored native outfit. You even brought a spear with you. HA HA HA What a guy...
You remember we stopped in that Dep run by the weird Arab guy to pick up a 6-pack in case we ran out? We had a garlic and anchovy pizza with that black chick, so she wanted to pick up some breath mints for us. So sweet. I wonder what ever happened to her? That was before you changed your name. I still have the video...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2mQpYG2POM

Affended? Yes. I will always be your afendi...

See? Isn't it wunnerful that people can communicate with each other? Like on this thread. Each one LISTENING and then respectfully commenting?

bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: open mike
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 09:13 PM

alimentary, my dear Watson..

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 09:36 PM

I've met Peace.

That's him to a T. All these years, pretending he was a mild-mannered firefighter from Alberta when in reality he was David Lee Roth.

Wow.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 10:39 PM

Speaking of Hitler and anchovy legs there was an American Cowboy, which is, of course, a loose translation of the Spanish/Mexican word "vaquero" which oddly enough means "cowboy" which was really a derogatory term for American blacks who were really the main of the working cattle wranglers in the early west. At any rate this cowboy sees a buyer's agent parked atop of the entry gate to a holding pen. The agent has a tally book in hand and the cowpoke (which is another term for cowboy but fo'cusses on the fact that a big part of the job was prodding the doggies[which is an acceptable term for "dogies"] which is another term for unfenced cattle {don't fence me in}]). Well the cowpuncher (you can probably figure that one out on your own) asks the agent "Whatcha doin' there?" to which the agent replies "I'm a countin' heads of cattle as they pass through the gate" Said cowboy has an astonished look on his face as the cows, well actually they were steers, well, not really steers as a lot of them hadn't been castrated. They were a mixed herd as having some steers among the bulls has a calming effect on the bulls. And there were cows among them also. You know it's a strange thing. You wouldn't think it but even in a closed in situation as a corral or a pen the bulls always seem to rise to the occasion when a receptive cow is nearby. Any how they were pouring through the gate at a pretty good rate of speed and the drover ( that's also a word for someone who drives cattle or sheep to market [although they share a common term for their respective jobs the cattlemen had no love for the sheep herders as sheep tend to eat the grass all the way down and leave no forage for the cattle]) says "How on earth can you keep track of all them cattle" to which the agent says that's easy. I just count their legs and divide by four."

I don't know much about herding anchovies but I imagine you take the tally in much the same way. I'd be interested in learning more about the subject since math is one of my favorite things and I believe that was the topic which Peace addressed.

As for Hitler, he didn't know the difference between a duck.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 08 - 10:56 PM

Which reminds me of the cowboy (the original term was "cow boy" and it wasn't complimentary, coming as it did from Western Virginia and Maryland from which cattle were driven to market in Baltimore and similar places) who was fixing fence when a hot shot dude skidded to a stop in his fancy car. "Say," said the dude, "if I tell you how many cows you have in that field can I have one?"

"Sure," said the cowboy.

"You have 417."

"Right," said the cowboy. "Now, if I can tell you where you're from and what you do for a living, would you give me my animal back?"

"Certainly," the dude said smugly.

"You're from California and you're an accountant," said the cowboy.

"Damn!" said the dude. "You're right on both counts, and I know you didn't know from the license plates because it's a rented car. How on earth did you know?"

"Us cowboys got our ways," the cowboy said. "Now gimme my blue heeler back."

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 08:55 AM

I say that if you can't stay on topic you should be flogged, keelhauled, tarred and feathered, and forced to drink hemlock. Which reminds me, where have all the really good milkshakes gone? Used to be that they were made with real milk and real ice cream and were nice and thick, like the slush we used to make slushballs from. I made one of those one time and smacked my brother in the back of the neck so that all of the slush ran down into his collar. It was one of those collars that had a button in the back as well as on the points in the front. I think they were called "Ivy League collars" or something. Like they were invented at Harvard or Yale or someplace like that. You know, one of the colleges that never have a good football team anymore? American football, of course, but I sure they also have soccer. And probably rugby and lacrosse and field hockey and Gaelic football, for all I know. I didn't go to one of those hoity-toity schools; couldn't afford it. And I got a good education anyway. Just goes to show that you don't have to attend Cambridge to be invited to speak there. It's all in what you do, not what you did. My grandma used to say that and it's true. She also used to say a lot of other neat things. My mom used to say, "People in hell want ice water." She'd say that when we'd whine about wanting something and we couldn't afford it. We never had much money but we were all happy. Not like today, when if a kid has to wee as soon as school's out. Back in my day we went outside and played until we were called for supper. After supper we did homework. Memorized poems and famous speeches, did arithmetic problems, memorized historical dates like 1066 and 1775, read books. We didn't have a television until I was nine years old. All the other kids would be talking about the TV shows, but we were reading and growing mentally while they were stunting their intellectual growth by watching Liberace or the McCarthy-Army hearings. Not us, no sirree! We were developing mental discipline, like the sort that I think we should all show by staying on topic in threads.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 09:12 AM

No Donuel I am not a silversmith although I have trained as one. My name comes from my Ebay dealings (Georgiansilver of course...currently selling scrap gold)....I do however collect Georgian silver cutlery and do valuations for people including local charity shops.
Best wishes, Mike.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 10:51 AM

I wonder if anchovies have elections. Does anyone know?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 11:02 AM

"Recall that when using the plurality method the jumbo pizza ended up with anchovies. Also note that anchovies were the last choice of 11 voters. Since many people who don't like anchovies really hate anchovies, it could well be the case that these 11 people - a clear majority - might not want any of the biggest pizza. Although this means more for the 7 people who like anchovies, overall it doesn't seem like the fairest way to choose.

How can we overcome these difficulties? One way is to begin by eliminating candidates until only two are left and then choose head to head between these two. Now the winner will have a majority."

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 11:13 AM

And another thing.


PS. I think where this has all gone wrong is we answered the prob about staying on-topic (or not) too fast, so there's just this thumb-twisting left.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 11:29 AM

They do in China Peace

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 11:35 AM

Peace: The only way you are going to get this many people to agree about anchovie pizza or staying on topic is, uh, well..you would have to be a wizard, Peace; or Dirty Harry, or both...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tu8hVPEWoyM&feature=related
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 01:36 PM

Whatever is the matter with Mozart? He just lays there, decomposing.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 01:51 PM

How many has he laid, Rap? Eggs, that is.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 02:50 PM

I've never pursued the accumulation of wealth and luxury much, figuring that someday someone would just drop a bag of money in my lap.

I think I've successfully traced this neurotic fixation for instant money-gratification back to my childhood while watching episodes of "The Millionaire" on small black and white televisions and subconsiously never stopped believing. O well....

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Well at LAST
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 02:55 PM

TWEED

My agent, Michael, couldn't find you ANYwhere. Had we but known your address . . . .

Sincerely,

John Beresford Tipton

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 03:10 PM

Praise the Lord and pass the Anchovies!! My life is now completely completed.

PM me, Dear Sir, and I'll give you all my account numbers.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Well at LAST
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 04:08 PM

Kindly we wish you to have ever happyness. Send youre account information to our offise in Lagos. We will forward the money to your bank account. Because it has been over forty years. To enshure you also get the acrued interest which has been carefully calculated and is now worth $7,681, 429.63, we will require a 'good will' deposit from you in the amount of $10,000. When you send your account information we will replie.

Sincerly

Ben Dover and Tay Kit.

Subject: Obit: John Beresford Tipton
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:14 PM

AP - John Beresford Tipton, noted billionaire who was known for giving away one million dollars to people completely unknown to him, died today at his home in The Humptons. According to Michael Anthony, spokesman for the Tipton family, he "was about to change his will to pass all of his money to someone called 'Tweed' when he had a massive heart attack."

The Bland County Coroner's Office released a statement that "foul play was not suspected" and that everything possible was done to help Mr. Tipton.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:22 PM

Topoi??? Don't you mean "Topol"?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:23 PM

Oy vey!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:25 PM

It was him that piddled on my roof.
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jeri
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:38 PM

Hey Rap, was he in North Humpton, South Humpton, or Humpton-Upon-Buggerall?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:44 PM

James Thrumpton..the man who invented the Hokey-Cokey.. died last week but his family are having trouble laying him to rest. Everything was going fine until they tried to put him in his coffin ..........
They put his left leg in....his left leg out........

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 05:48 PM

The skeleton found in the cavity wall of a house in London last week was that of James Houghton the world hide-and-seek champion who was not found in 1956...........

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 06:31 PM

There was a skeleton found in my closet once.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 06:33 PM

Scared to come out huh?
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Emma B
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 06:34 PM

as sung at the Sheffield carols :)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 07:46 PM

I was spelunking for sightless fish in a cave at one point. The thing was chock full of marmites and maglites. The tour guide assured us that it was a natural phenomenon but it was fairly disturbing to many in the group as they were mooing and hawing like livestock.
He spoke in garlic and stunk to high heaven and I barely escaped with all my senses intact!!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jan 08 - 10:39 PM

I was garlicking through a spelunk one time I found a pretzel the goat have overlooked. Fortunately it was thyme and I didn't macerate it.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 01:59 AM

The Lombards nearly wrecked the pizza thing. I mean, they had balls (3 no less!) but not a one of them knew what an anchovy was even though wild herds of them roamed that portion of the Alps in ancient times (I'm told). There are many caves in those same mountains and, I suppose the sightless fishing is good but I would really, really like to try tying into one of those spelunkers. Lunkers anywhere in the world put up a pretty good scrap as did the Lombards. AND the Lombards or their descendants are paying pretty good prices right now for scrap gold. Or so I'm told.

Rap??? What are you going on about a goat for??? Who mentioned a goat? I suggest you re-read the initial thread and DO try to stay on top of it, OK?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 07:56 AM

Yes, what are you on about goats for Rapiere? Stop bleating a dead horse.

HeeHawww.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 09:13 AM

I'm sorry. I forgot to mention that the goat had eaten my anchovies and as a result (I guess) had become violently sick to its stomach. You see, the anchovies were still alive and I was going to release them in the Strait of Juan de Fuckah. That's on the Snake River, just downstream from Arimo and upstream from Burley. It's called that because it's where Juan McDonald got himself into a dire strait when Henry Plummer caught Juan with Colletta, Henry's nubile daughter, back in 1863. Henry, of course, was later hanged by the Vigilantes up in Montana, and well-deserved it was, too.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 09:14 AM

MMMMM If I got into necrophylia, flaggelation and bestiality...do you think I might be 'flogging a dead horse'?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 09:16 AM

Was Juan well hung too?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 09:51 AM

Was he strung up by his anchovies?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 09:56 AM

You people are SICK!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 10:09 AM

And you're completely off topic!
We've not gotten to "sickness" as of yet, however, I once had pneumonia. I was real sick for several days and eventually died from it. When I was brought back around, I don't know if I went to heaven or hell, but it looked exactly like everything does now.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 10:12 AM

A good cure for that is anchovy paste spread on one's chest.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 01:26 PM

Anchovies on a dead mans chest,
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 02:18 PM

I've got a bottle of 151 proof Lamb's rum at home. Thanks for reminding me.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 03:27 PM

I don't. Thanks for reminding me.

That's quite an anchoivement. (Got that in chest in time)

Don't feel I've lost my bottle, or lost it, or anything.

Feeling threadfully pleased with my "sickness".

maybe threads find their own topics. Has anyone thought of that!

If that's it, then , hurrah. We're. On . Topic.


(You'd never have guessed mercury was retrograde, would you?)


   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 03:33 PM

I thought mercury was usually either a liquid or a vapor. Is retrograde a new form of matter?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 05:00 PM

It's Hell Tweed, Hell.

Thanks for clearing that up Rap. Such little oversights can be mighty perplexing. I wasn't trying to get your goat. Just define it.

   Mary had a rummy lamb
   It was always in a stew.

   When ever Mary was at a loss
   The lamb knew what to do.

I dare you to finish that by making at least one reference to the above mentioned goat (just to tie things together real neat-like.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 05:04 PM

Mary had a little goat
She thought it was a nanny
And every time that she bent down
It bit her in the fanny.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 05:08 PM

Mary liked a certain group
Led by Jon Bon Jovi,
He sang her songs of goats and lambs
And pizzas with anchovy.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 05:19 PM

Billy met a lovely girl
Her looks he couldn't fault, he
said she reminded him of a fish
But perhaps a bit more salty

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 06:13 PM

Mary had a little lamb
And the midwife fainted!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 06:29 PM

Mary had a little lamb
That loved to eat anchovies.
It ate their fins and gills and tails
Their testes and their ovaries.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 31 Jan 08 - 06:45 PM

Pizza...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1e6Pe2BuwQ&feature=related
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 01:37 AM

Just to stay on-topic, about which I'm obsessed, must repeat

mary had a little lamb

her father shot it dead

Now mary takes the lamb to school

The last you've already read.


When a planet is 'retrograde', it appears to us to be moving backwards.

may the jokes begin - I can't waut 0 er - wait.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 02:40 AM

autolycus You're a star!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 05:22 AM

Arcturus is a star; Autolycus is a figure from Greek mythology.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 10:05 AM

Autolycus is a shining light in a heaven of shining lights. Be at one with the universe and at two, be at the malt shop.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 10:13 AM

OK. Let me rephrase that. I just had a few sips of coffee.

Ommmmm


Ommmmm


Ommmmm

Tell me, do anchovies grow to be 1000 pounds? What would a ticked off anchovy be like? If their knees bent the other way, what would chairs look like?


Ommmmm

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 10:21 AM

Flamingos of course Peace

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 10:29 AM

EUREKA!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 11:27 AM

Pizza twirlin', Rod Serling,
Mary is the lamb,
Anchovie gets hungry,
OM will understand...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRNDRfbdK2M
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 02:49 PM

'giok' reekers of what, exactly?

itm, thank you for those kind words. georgiansilver, where do u (I mean 'I') send the (touches side of nose nonchalently so nobody else sees)?

Actually, my 91-y-o Mum is a star. She was named Estelle. would you adam-'n'-eve it?

A ticked-off anchovy would be either head bowed, or, present, sir.

Sorry Peace, but malt isn't my cup of tea (boom! boom!).But in the meantime, - whoops - ahem (good gried I mean grief!!) .   More senior by the moment.

What were we talking about before I so rudely interrupted myself?

Ivor


PS. Where could I make a living doing this sort of thing?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 02:53 PM

"PS. Where could I make a living doing this sort of thing?"

The malt shop?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 04:18 PM

You mean to tell me we're not getting PAID for this?
$4000/seat tickets at the Superbowl and all I get is
a virtual anchovy?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 04:59 PM

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director, "How do
you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized?"

"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a
teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to
empty the bathtub."


"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the
bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."


"No." said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you
want a bed near the window?"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 05:26 PM

Mary had an anchovy
She kept it in the yard
Because it weighed two thousand pounds
And was cooked until it charred.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 06:19 PM

Champion Jack Dupree stayin' on topic with King Curtis...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xXDxnUmMz8&feature=related If Y'all got a mind to, look carefully at who is in the audience...

bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 07:04 PM

ANNE CHOVY FOR PRESIDENT!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Feb 08 - 08:55 PM

Wasn't she the Pensacola pole dancer who did such interesting things with tassles?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 06:56 AM

With any luck, she drinks like a fish.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 09:46 AM

Slip her a fin and see.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Tweed
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 10:45 AM

a fin...oooooo....that one was really bad, even for you Rap.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: catspaw49
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 10:48 AM

Did you know that the planet Mercury was struck by an oozing metal hemorrhoid?

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 10:49 AM

That sounded fishy

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 11:40 AM

Erm excuse me but what is the topic anyway....oh...the price of fuel is it? Over £1 a litre in the UK...more than $2 in US lolly. I think it is disgusting!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 11:44 AM

US Popsicle surely?
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 04:42 PM

I think the topic may have become how the unconscious subverts consciousness, with an anchovy topping.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 04:58 PM

Perhaps someone should discover a means of making fuel from anchovies

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 06:33 PM

That's some tail there Anne. Can you sing the scales?
I'd like a 2000 pound anchovy, please, and an equally proprtionate pizza under it, to go.

What pray tell IS a "chovy" and if an ANchovy is the rival of a chovy shouldn't the topic really be "Chovies"? Can't you folks PLEASE stay on topic? I don't want to get confused at this piont in the discussion. Fo'cuss!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 06:36 PM

By chovy's got it.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 06:38 PM

My latest pair of spectacles certainly help me with my focus. Reading has been such a problem for a while now....reckon when they told me as a teenage boy I would go blind if I carried on doing what I did, they must have been right eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Megan L
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 06:39 PM

Oh dear stop carping about the topic and just eat the hazlenuts

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 06:46 PM

Carpe Diem Meg?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 07:16 PM

"Anaerobic" means "without air." "Anchovy" must, there, mean "without chovy" (anchovies meaning "without chovies").

It's probably a medical term: "Doctor! The patient is anchovic!"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 07:17 PM

Jaysus, you folks are nuts.

Anyway, if we can't agree to an anchovy pizza, how's about peanut butter and mayonnaise?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 07:33 PM

Wot, no jelleeeeeeeeeeeee?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Peace
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 09:55 PM

OK, Giok. Mayonnaise and jelly.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Feb 08 - 10:01 PM

I happen to like peanut butter and mayonnaise, pb and jelly, pb and honey. I've never tried them all at once, though.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 02:41 AM

Bacon and Banana with mayo sandwich. Now THAT'S good!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 02:43 AM

Wait a minute!!!! WAIT! I just got drawn of the Topic of Carpricorn! That's what I was talkin' about. Fo' Cussit all any whozit!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 02:46 AM

300. What? Nobody wants it at theis inelegant hour? Weel, as long as it's here. I have dial - up and this one is starting to reach my limit. Gotta get sattelite.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 03:27 AM

slag you've gone off topic there, whatever the topic is LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 05:27 AM

Cheese and marmalade sandwich, must be a good strong cheese, like a mature Canadian Cheddar.

Is mature Canadian an oxymoron?


G.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 08:44 AM

Peace, that was soooooo off-topic.

There's something missing from the title of this thread. Should have read 'Staying on topic in threads IS BLOODY DIFFICULT'


Anyway, so, this morning I had      

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 08:52 AM

Beer!......Plenty of Beer......

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 09:05 AM

And muktuk. It's what's for breakfast now.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 09:10 AM

I'm in threads - is that on topic?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 10:49 AM

My topic is bigger than your topic...

Primordial(looking out my back window)... Example of how we got to THIS as we evolved from the apes. Remember, the original statement was: "I(Peace) thought it would be a good idea to start a thread about staying on topic." Possible response: "Yeah, so?" Or, O.K., you started one, now what do we do? Or, you are either on the topic being discussed, or you aren't. Then come the TANGENTS...
Your wife asks you to go to the store to buy milk. You go to the store and bring back beer, and you forget the milk. The the DISCUSSION starts. About "it's all, about YOU." Which slips into, "You don't love me anymore." Then she reminds you of your naughty nite in Newcastle, and pretty soon...well, you get the idea(maybe), pretty soon, your up to your Azz in anchovies, when the original intention was to drain the swamp...or something like that.
Don't you feel blessed that no-one has flipped the nuclear switch while all this is going on? Amazing we are all still here with all this divergence....
Anyhound, it's Sunday and I'm going for DIM SUM...
:o) bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 11:04 AM

I was that way when I was learning to add, so don't feel badly. You can always get a calculator and then you won't have dim sums anymore. Especially if it has a backlight.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 11:22 AM

THREAD TOPIC SECURITY ALERT!

The Department of Thread Topic Security has elevated the security status of this thread to

ORANGE trimmed in PURPLE.

This is in response to vague yet unreliable reports of large numbers of pickled pigs' feet amassed on the borders of this thread. The pigs' feet are reportedly angry that anchovies are the only disgusting "food" product being discussed here and are poised to take over this thread and demand equal treatment.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 11:41 AM

I'll let you guys into a secret here, when your wife says "You don't love me any more" there is one answer that will get you out of trouble every time, and it is this........

'But darling, I couldn't love you any more than I do'


Remember this.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 11:44 AM

And pickled pigs' tails, which are threatening America's East South East by North coast.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 12:02 PM

I believe that Dim Sum is what you get when you pose an arithmetic quiz question to a slow learner...

Thank you all for seeing us through the recent crisis. You stood out like true heros, and your contributions in averting the most awful catastrophe yet recorded in these halls has been chiseled in stone into the shopping lists of history.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 12:08 PM

"The pigs' feet are reportedly angry that anchovies are the only disgusting "food" product being discussed here and are poised to take over this thread and demand equal treatment."

Hey, NO PROBLEM.

Now, there's a pizza: Anchovies, peanut butter, mayonnaise AND pigs feet.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 06:18 PM

Don't forget sheep's eyeballs. And duck's blood, but if that's not handy just use pig blood or even horse blood.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 06:50 PM

The nice thing about pig's feet is that there are usually some of the hairs left on even after cooking. These provide you with toothpicks.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 03 Feb 08 - 11:13 PM

OK. It's been about 315 posts and I have a request.

Will someone, ANYone please tell me what this thread is about?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: ragdall
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 12:25 AM

It's about sharing thoughts with other cognitive beings, even though none of you really have anything to say?

(Hopes there's a prize for the right answer.)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 01:41 AM

Well, Peace, what do you want this thread to be about? - pig's feet, Lord Buckly, anchovies, someone else's wife fred bear, a discussion - "the choice is yours,you decide,it's up to you'

I had a go at the original way back in the winter of '08 - phhhhhht!ding, aka 26.1

ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 08:15 AM

From somewhere across the mist-shrouded lake is heard the lonely, winsome, plaintive cry of a loon.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 08:51 AM

Gimme A Pig Foot And A Bottle Of Beer
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 12:54 PM

The taverns, back in the day, all had these huge jars of pickled egges, pickled pigs' feet, and pickled pigs' tails. The last looked like a large jar of preserved snakes, but some folks like them.

Especially after enough beer.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 01:04 PM

BEER? Did you say BEER? That's IT.

Thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 01:05 PM

Nah, that was Adrien

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 01:11 PM

Adrien has beer? Let's go to his place.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 01:13 PM

But, does he have anchovies?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 02:22 PM

Free Ann Chovies now!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 02:39 PM

She's in jail?



FREE ANN CHOVIES NOW!

FREE ANN CHOVIES NOW!

FREE ANN CHOVIES NOW!

FREE ANN CHOVIES NOW!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 02:41 PM

FREE BEER TOMORROW!!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 02:42 PM

Ann Chovies picture.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 02:53 PM

She has a close relative called Bum[m]alo, aka Bombay Duck.
Might be one of Jane and Geoff's distant relations.

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 03:04 PM

I thought that was Godgifu, wife of the late Earl of Mercia.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 03:06 PM

Free beer tomorrow??? Didn't know he was in jail...thought I hadn't seen one of his posts lately.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 03:09 PM

Free beer tomorrow, free beer yesterday, but never free beer today.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 03:26 PM

OK. If we're gonna free both Ann and Beer, what's the plan?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: gnu
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 03:31 PM

Beer is in trouble? ADRIEN!!!!!!!!! Send Rambo in.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 04 Feb 08 - 06:42 PM

Looks like a job for anchovy man.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 10:38 AM

In the case of the beer, the plan is to wait till tomorrow. Same as the jam.

In Ann's case, get her taken off the charge. Then, She'll. Be. Free.

Otherwise she'll be in a jam. Not the same jam. Obviously.

   
Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 12:21 PM

Good idea.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 12:24 PM

Hmm, Anchovy Jam eh, better use crunchy peanut butter then.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 12:25 PM

Good call, Giok.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 02:27 PM

Do we know if an(ne) even like crunchy peanut butter. I think we should be told.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 03:36 PM

Crunchy Anchovy Butter...now you're talkin'

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 03:37 PM

That sounds kinda, uh, curd/cude/curde lascivious.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 03:42 PM

Ann-chovy said she loved peanuts. (Well it sounded like peanuts)
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 03:57 PM

I was wrong before. Should have read

   To-pic

   Or off to-pic

   THAAAAAT is the question


    And what happen to the dru,m ro;; thing. I was looking forward to settling into my bath and failing to read about that on account of the bath being upstairs and the ol' grey computer in the east-nor'east being h-downstairs.

   Also noticed there are more gents on this thread. Is that because of the intelligence-quotient it requires?

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 04:06 PM

Oh Ivor, you are sailing close to the wind there. If I were you I should listen for a shout of "CELLAR IVOR" coming from the direction of Maine.
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 09:57 PM

It's Tuesday, so...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpi6kwDeg2s&feature=related
hold the anchovies...
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 10:10 PM

Did you know it's green? It's green. Bet you didn't know that. Green. Grren is like, you know, green. If you look real close you can see like, someting. Green, ya know? Like the frog, Kernut. I don't think that's right wait Kurmit. That looks funy. The mupp it frog. The green one. He sang somethin abut green. Bet you didn't now it's green idd you?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 10:15 PM

Anchovy Man is B-O-G-U-S! That's not an anchovy. It's a jack mackerel.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 10:19 PM

OK, so it's mackerel man already, I wanted to stay on topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Feb 08 - 10:24 PM

Gren mackeral?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 01:49 AM

Same as green, just someone has taken an e. So now we know what one drug is made from - mackerel. I. Always. Thought. There. Was Something. Fishy. About . Drugs. (Boom,Boom)

(Can't even find my coat. I may stay and face the female music)

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 08:56 AM

What key is female music in?
C# or Bb, is it Major or Minor?

Am I headed for the cellar again?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 12:10 PM

A major. Major cos it's important. A, cos do we know what's going on?


Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 12:46 PM

Some species of jack mackerel are green. They're not really mackerel at all, but are in the same family as jacks, pompano, and scads. They make good bait when fishing for real mackerel.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: catspaw49
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 12:59 PM

Holy Mackerel!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 01:10 PM

WTF is all this talk about FISH? I thought anchovies were those little crunchy things ya get sometimes in those goor-met shops. They come in little jars or cans. Picture here. No wonder I thoght the thread had gone off topic.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Ebbie
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 01:11 PM

"Also noticed there are more gents on this thread. Is that because of the intelligence-quotient it requires?"

Ivor and Giok, et al, I agree with you both. Not much intelligence is required or evident. :)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 01:26 PM

If you find yourself in an abnormal position on this thread you could be "Ectopic"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 01:32 PM

Or even dystopic, whoever Dy is?

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 01:54 PM

Thanks Ebbie, I kneeeeew I was safe on this thread, especially with Mercurt retrograde. I'll return to Theodore Adorno's Philodophy of Modern Music when Mercury goes forward agin. Or when I've eaten enough fish to get a big enough load of grey cells. Or is that a prison?

Anyway this isn't the intelligence thread but the unconscious rules one.



Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 02:14 PM

Well, if it's not dystopic it might be dat one.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 05:58 PM

"this isn't the intelligence thread"

Talk about yer generic kick in the stones!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 06:56 PM

Kicking stones can be quite bad for the toes unless you have steel toe-capped boots of course.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 07:17 PM

Did you say Stones?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rrp7TPOdR98&feature=related

God I love Folk Music...
No bitchin', start twitchin',
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 07:52 PM

I knew a folk musician who used to twitch a lot whenever he'd perform. It wasn't part of his gig -- just fleas.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 10:12 PM

Holy Macarolie! Of course that's not an anchovy, no legs. But that guy really tied one on.

Mercury could only be in retrograde if we were orbiting one of the outer planets, say Jupiter. Now say chrysamthimum. Cheese anyone?
Amberjack, ambergris, amberdextrious, amberphibans (and other liars). Perhaps dextrose and sinisterose. Bar sinister. Before the bar sinister. Left, to take the bar exam. Bar? Bar bar, Barbarosa! Was he a Lom-bar-d? Which finally gets us back to the Tropic of Anchovies which is what I said in the second place.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 06 Feb 08 - 10:19 PM

You really got the hang of it Slag.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Slag
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 12:15 AM

I pull them out as they come by.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 01:56 AM

Out. Of . The. Unconscious Anchovy?

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 02:50 AM

Enough of this oh so evasive banter....get back to the topic and the topic of course as you all know is the topic itself so make the topic the topic OK?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 04:34 AM

From Wikipedia:

Marko Topic (born 1 January 1976 in Sanski Most, now Oštra Luka) is a Bosnian Croat footballer. He plays for Saturn in the Russian Premier League.

"So, what the hell's a 'footballer'?" you're probably wondering. Well, "balling" is a 1960s and 1970s slang term meaning "casual recreational sexual intercourse". Therefore, a "footballer" is someone who fucks feet. Professional footfucking is virtually unheard of in North America, though it apparently causes riots in the rest of the world.

The nearest equivalent to footballing in North American sport is tractor pulling, wherein participants pull on each other's "tractors" until one or the other cries, "Uncle!"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 05:05 AM

Topic (A) Kansas.


Is that near where Dorothy came from?


G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 09:24 AM

I don't think my Aunt Dorothy was ever in Kansas. I'm not sure she even crossed the river to Missouri very often. All she would have had to do was to drive or walk across the bridge or take a ferry. But she was pretty much a stay-at-home. Of course, she's dead now. If she wasn't dead she'd be in her 90s, but since she's dead we stopped keeping track of her age. People usually do that, stop keeping track of someone's age after a person dies. I've always wondered why that is. I mean, why shouldn't someone be able to go into a bar and have a drink on their 21st birthday even though they're dead? In Chicago they vote all the time and nobody says anything about it. Like King Richard Daley I said, "Just because you're dead doesn't mean you lose your citizenship."

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 10:55 AM

This thread is getting more like...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11BQQvVy8LI
every minute...
bob
Peace: You look nice in pink! :>)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 11:19 AM

And...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_qd0Zl8CiA
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 02:53 PM

Or this.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 04:42 PM

.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 07:12 PM

First time I've seen Peace speechless in a long time. Considering this is HIS thread to begin with. Or, has he become Zen-like? In that by saying NOTHING, he has said EVERYTHING!...
Inscrutable, these Folksingers...
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 07:22 PM

Yes. Now I am POSITIVE. You see that little dot above the line in His last post?...Reminescent of a Zen Koan. And in his own indefatiguable way, Peace has returned to the whole POINT(The ONE) of this thread, which is about staying on topic. What a Master of the non-written AND written word!!! I stand in AWE of his capabilities...Applause...
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 08:13 PM

Standing in awe of his capabilities? Hah! What a piker! I kneel in awe of his capabilities! I prostrate myself in awe of his capabilities! I talk in tongues, handle live rattlesnakes and play the banjo all at the same time in awe of his capabilities!

Errr... Exactly what capabilities are we talking about here?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 08:48 PM

Uh...pulling hats out of rabbits, in a spiritual sense...
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 08:50 PM

FREE ANN CHOVY

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 08 - 10:27 PM

Yes, okay. Consider it done.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jim Lad
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 12:13 AM

Didn't know harassment was just one word!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 01:58 AM

Never mind a fee ann chovy. I-I-I-I-I-I'm going to a concert tomorrow with TWO women who've paid for their own tickets (Schumann, Mahler).

   Can I be so unintelligent as this thread displays? I dawnt fink saw.

   So you can have fee ann chovy, aka 'free'. A-a-a-a-nd your anchovies. See if I care.

   As for silence,"























                                        " to you to.


    Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 06:04 AM

No thanks Peace, I've already got one.
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 08:46 AM

Wait. Does Peace mean that Ann Chovy is being held in durance vile and we should work to liberate her, or does he mean that she is a "loose woman" and free with her "favors"? Or perhaps both? Or is he making a statement that she a free spirit, the sort who would dance through the daisies and butterflies in a joyful celebration of Life?

This is a conundrum that must be solved before anything can be done.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 08:48 AM

"I-I-I-I-I-I'm going to a concert tomorrow with TWO women who've paid for their own tickets (Schumann, Mahler)."

They related to the composers?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 09:00 AM

Better composed women than decomposed women, Peace.
Or am I being dead boring?


G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 09:40 AM

It's better not to be an anchovy because people IGNORE you!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 09:46 AM

IGNAW

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 09:59 AM

LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 10:31 AM

A thread of PEACE and ANCHOVIAL HUMOUR....lovely!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 10:38 AM

Gives new meaning to it all, doesn't it?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 11:10 AM

That guy's got one ugly girlfriend. I've been to Canada and I ain't NEVER seen a woman that ugly (except maybe around the docks in Halifax). We should Do Something for that guy -- maybe get him fixed up with Ann Chovy.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 11:19 AM

Now, THAT'S a mission!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 11:21 AM

Thought that was AnnChovey, sure smells like her.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 01:59 PM

Gung Hoy Fat Choy!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:11 PM

We're all related to the composers. And each other. nalopkt

   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:22 PM

Gung Hoy Fat Choy to you too Bob. Are you a rat?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:25 PM

I am beginning to think the posters here are not taking this thread seriously. Let's get focussed, folks.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:27 PM

Folk cussed?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:29 PM

Out of focus

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:31 PM

What the focus that?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:34 PM

I'm a folk and I kin cuss real good. Jist ask the guy who prit near run inta my car yesterday when he turned left from a right hand lane. I cussed so good at him I plumb melted his hood ornyment and set his hair on fire -- ALL of his hair, not jist the stuff on his haid. So iffen you want from folk cussing I'm somebody who kin do it real good.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:35 PM

keep your eyes on the topic...focus...

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 02:40 PM

Y'all ever have a crowd that had NO MERCY! Just wondering. That's no a remark. I'm just wondering, that's all. Just


OK, this foc us thing. What exactly do we MEAN by that?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 04:07 PM

That's obvious Brucie...just focus on it and you'll get your answer!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 04:32 PM

bobad: I am the little red rooster, to lazy to crow 'fo day...
I do, however, have a RAT(distortion pedal)...
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 04:36 PM

de foc us wot u uses to eat de annie chovy.

And fur bonnie Annie Chovey, I'd lay me doon an' dee.


G.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 04:40 PM

I was running tech on a production of "Dracula" (live theater) and on the last night the crowd was downright mean. No applause, and you could feel the mean in the air. But it WAS the last night of the run....

So I had put a wee little bit more flash powder than normal in the flash box that I exploded when Drac entered.... Sure, I nearly set him on fire and he was fanning his cape to clear away the smoke...and in the scene where the heroine (who has been bitten by Drac) is seducing the hero and he's pawing up her dress and those who were to come in and stop the seduction after a five count from the cue delayed for a slow thirty count and poor Suzanne was wondering how far she was willing to go for theater....

Well, almost setting Drac on fire sorta broke the ice with the audience and they were cheering the hero on in the seduction scene. So if you ever have a mean crowd, try to set someone on fire. They'll warm to you if you do.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 04:51 PM

Got a mean crowd? Give 'em a taste of this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13D1YY_BvWU
Get dem sum beatches runnin' for the hills!

Or, just "Chuck Berry" 'em by whackin' 'em with the headstock of yer guitar. WHILE YOU'RE PLAYING!

bob
p.s. Ever try playing blues in an Irish bar?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 05:00 PM

My Daddy used to tell a joke 'bout 2 women who went to a photographer. (This pre-1954...and both the cultural group of the women and the type of photography were based on his upbringing)

Seems Lucy talked Sally into going to get a photo taken. The photographer posed them on stools, then went to this big box and ducked his head under a dark cloth.

Sally says to Lucy "Hey..what's he doin'?"
Lucy replies, "He's gonna FOCUS!"
Sally gasps..."Whut...both of us?"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 06:34 PM

Ya know like, it's like, ya know, like? I mean like, it's like, ya know?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 06:36 PM

Who needs a camera to erm erm focus?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 08 - 06:51 PM

I thought that what politicians were for -- to focus.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 05:05 AM

Did Cecil Sharp, Folk us ?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 07:26 AM

Trouble is Topic bars are neither Fair Trade nor organic aka drug-free in production. Otherwise i could buy one and sit on it while online. As long as I keep my clothes on, I'll be on topic in threads.

(I still prefer, chovy or anne chovy; that is is the question.)(Even tho' Professor Skeat does question the semi-colon)



   Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:40 AM

The good prof is okay, but stay away from Nurse Ratchet. If you sit on a chocolate bar, won't people question your personal hygiene when you arise?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 05:44 PM

Tell you what, I'll put the bar in a little box, and sit on that. Is that thread-drift?

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 05:48 PM

I just don't want you embarrassed by brown stains and lumps on the back of your pants when you stand up.

That's because I'm a caring sort of person and I won't be there to see it anyway.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 05:52 PM

Good question, Ivor. GOOD question. However, are you using the 1954 definition of thread-drift or another?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 05:58 PM

Don't forget the Codicil of Orillia (1962) or the St. Albans Addendum of 1967, Peace.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 06:01 PM

How COULD I forget. Thanks, Rapaire.

Yeah, what HE said.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 06:03 PM

Mornington Crescent!!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:20 PM

I don't have any .45-70 ammunition handy, I'm sorry to say. I don't even have any unhandy. I don't have any at all, in fact. Nor do I have any .38-55, .50-90, or any of those. I also have no 5.56mm, 6.5mm, 7.62x54R, 7.62 NATO, .50 BMG, 12.7mm, 9mm Parabellum, 10mm, .303, 7.92mm, 8mm or .30-40 Krag.

I do have some .177 caliber bb's to spare, though.

I'm sorry. I know you think badly of my masculinity. I'll try to do better the next time.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:22 PM

Get FOCUSSED, Rap, FOCUSSED.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:23 PM

OK. Here's the goal of this thread as I see it. We get to 500 posts and stop, as on a dime.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:27 PM

Slicker than goose shit. Whadyasay?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:44 PM

OK. I need advice. I have been trying to cook a turkey in the fridge for eleven years. (Yes, 11 years.) It's a 22 pounder and all the feathers have fallen out, and, it ain't yet cooked. What am I doing wrong?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:47 PM

And I have no intent to be offensive, but it has come to my attention that some of you are not taking this thread as seriously as maybe you would want to if you actually UNDERSTOOD its purpose. The purpose is to























                                     and then it would lead to the salvation of all humankind. No Sh#t.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 08:49 PM

Somebody save that post. It was a passing thought that I now forget. SAVE THAT POST. And while yer at it, save Ann Chovey.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 09:05 PM

You gotta cook stuff on the hot thing, man. Not on the cold thing.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 09:12 PM

Thanks. Tell me NOW!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 10:36 PM

Eureka! I've got it! I've figured out how to stay on topic in this thread!

Since this thread has no topic, it would seem to be impossible to stay on topic. But if you read the thread title closely, it says "Staying on topic in threads". It doesn't say anything about staying on topic in this thread. And since this thread has no topic, the only way to stay on topic is to post something that is on topic in some other thread!

So, here's a post:

"Hey! Space case! Wake up! Don't just sit there staring into space! Pass that damned thing this way!"

(On topic in the "Bong Hits for Obama" thread.)

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 09 Feb 08 - 10:51 PM

Peace. It's easy. Put the refrigerator into the oven and bake at 350F. for 2&1/2 hours...

Or, simply fly your B-52 over the sum bitch, and drop a mini "little boy" on it, cook for a nanosecond. Dinner should be ready for sub-human consumption in about 100 years...

bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:46 AM

Peace...I actually think it about time you killed the turkey! It's probably pretty fed up by now with all your efforts.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:52 AM

Nah keep it Peace, ya never know when Rudy Giuliani might need transplant surgery.

G.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:31 PM

Do you realise that the women have gone off (unlike the turkey)(btw, I'd have a go at IN the hot thing)

So we could - do   -   anything. Even, say it quietly, slip off-thread - sssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Ralk about women? They'll bever know.


Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:35 PM

"bever" Ivor, was that an ypto?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John Hardly
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:41 PM

turkey -- a colloquial term for a jailer.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:48 PM

so do they have turkeys in turkey? Did you mean Turnkey by any chance?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:49 PM

gaoler you mean?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:50 PM

I am cut to the quick by this remark from my old friend, BWL: "Since this thread has no topic, it would seem to be impossible to stay on topic."

NO TOPIC? Jaysus, Joseph and Murphy. NO TOPIC?

Look, bud, just because YOU can't find the topic of this thread is no reason to say, out loud on a public forum, that this therad HAS no topic. I work hours on the initial post to ensure JUST THAT. That there would be a topic in this thread. To tell me at this point that my life's work has culminated in disaster and that the thread is topicless in a low blow, a kick in the stones, a glove in the face, a turd in the punch bowl, a D13b5b9 in Amazing Grace.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 03:51 PM

Padron the ytpos.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:05 PM

De nada Padrone

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:26 PM

But Brucie..the topic is about staying on topic surely and the topic must therefore be the topic....whatever the topic we are trying to stay on is! if you get my drift.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:34 PM

Et tu, Brute?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:35 PM

Hey, 50 posts to go and this thread is gonzo.

How's about real cool filohsoficul/filosophical/fillosofigull/ smart stuff?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:40 PM

Is that the topic then?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:42 PM

turkey -- a colloquial term for a jailer.

Oh, okay. Can I have a turnkey sandwich, then?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:46 PM

LOL@ Stilly

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:47 PM

I confess that I haven't read the whole of this thread! I wanted to contribute again before the 500 post deadline but I know that I risk repeating some point that has already been made, or even worse - going off topic. Perhaps I'll leave it.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:49 PM

And then there's this . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:50 PM

Thank you, eanjay. At last, someone who has followed the plot despite not having read the thread. I thank you from the

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:53 PM

heart of your bottom Peace?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:55 PM

YEAH. That's it.

I am wounded to read that BWL has found no uniting theme in this thread. If I drank, I would go get pissed. Alas . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 04:57 PM

Oh, and btw, that Latin phrase [Et tu Brute] translates to
"And you too ya big brute?" Just in case anyone was wondering.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 05:05 PM

Is there like, a PRIZE for the 500th post?

But what if you let it go on for say, 40 years? And somebody puts it in a time capsule. And sends it into outer space, which, by that time, will be irrelevant, since THEY will have already landed and will have placed themselves up as political leaders, like Hilary Clinton. HEY! Do you think that ...

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 05:20 PM

The person who posts # 500 will receive the turkey in the mail.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 05:39 PM

I don't want GWB in my mail box thanks.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 06:03 PM

Oh. I can't say as I blame you, Giok.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Feb 08 - 10:13 PM

He could be sent UPS or FedEx directly to your door. No mailbox involved.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 01:46 AM

So nobody wants to talk about women , what bever? btw, what tpoy?

And I thank you from the bottom of my heart and my wife's bottom, too.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 05:29 AM

Your wife's bottom two whats Ivor?

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 09:11 AM

I thank you from the bottom of Ivor's wife as well.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 11:20 AM

Cheeky

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 02:46 PM

'Twas a jest. I hint got a wife currently. Application forms are available in the foyer.

I am a trained teacher )currently resting), so anyone who wants punctuation lessons (no 'Giok' names, no 'Giok' packdrill) can have them at £20 a pop.

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 02:51 PM

Oh I always snafu the possessive apostrophe matey :)

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 05:16 PM

"anyone who wants punctuation lessons"

I do. That's boxing, right? I'm in.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 07:11 PM

Whoa, Dude! There's a Google ad at the bottom of the page that says "Find a Cheating Wife! Thousands of Women in Your Area. Find Your Match For Free Now!"

Cheating? Hell, if I go through all the trouble of finding a loose woman via the Interweb I'm damned sure not gonna play Gin Rummy with her!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 07:16 PM

Two-handed bridge?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 08 - 07:33 PM

Two-handed solitaire?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 05:16 AM

Why play Bridge when you can play Solitaire?
You don't need a partner if you've got a good hand!

G

Euchred in the Highlands

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 09:38 AM

I thought that Highland bridge fell down years and years ago.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: autolycus
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 12:06 PM

Never did get to the bottom of my ex. Scorpio's eh. ck!

Uvor

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 01:16 PM

Yeah scorpions...pretty nasty sting I've heard.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 01:18 PM

"Euchred in the Highlands"

Very sorry to hear that, Giok.


OK, I need to know: Did it hurt? How much did it change your voice?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 05:52 PM

Did all your hair fall out? Do you get to guard the harem of Scotland's King, Lenny of Bruce?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 05:54 PM

Happy Birthday Rapaire.
G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 06:05 PM

LOL

Never seen him at a loss for words before.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 06:07 PM

BTW, only 17 posts until this thread is retired. Time to get yer dibs in while you still can.

I thought it would be really neat to have a thread that just stops at 500 and by mutual concent disappears from the board. Ya figure?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 06:09 PM

Well, I'll do my bit to hurry it along!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: bobad
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 06:20 PM

It's gonna be missed when it's gone.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 06:30 PM

What is?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 09:37 PM

No, no, no y'ornery Scot. Not "what is?"--repeat after me: "What it is?"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 12 Feb 08 - 10:29 PM

And now, a word from our sponsors...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBdC8lORHh8
bob

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 05:18 AM

And now, a word from our sponsons
There ya go bob :)
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 08:59 AM

Oh, there's no real reason for it. None at all. It's just the way things are done. We tried other ways some years back but they didn't work so we went back to the tried-and-true. Sure, you can try something else. Just get the approval of three basilisks, the VP of cherubim, and Trotsky. And you'd better get Roosevelt's approval too. Just to be safe, you know. And the King's. Definitely get the King's. Good luck -- we're always glad to see young people trying new ideas.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 10:11 AM

Pamcakes destroyed the--exactly where IS

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 11:40 AM

Who the heck is Pam Cakes...is she a friend of Ann Chovey?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 11:51 AM

FREE ANN CHOVY

FREE PAM CAKES

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 11:55 AM

Free beer! Drinks for everybody! On the house!

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: GUEST,Bob Ryszkiewicz
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 11:57 AM

Thanks "Giok"! Reminds me of my 'ol surfin' days way back when. The ocean. Anchovies IN the ocean. Hey, right on topic! Always wanted to ask you. what the fnerk does "Giok" mean anyway? Is it like "Jack?"

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 12:09 PM

Italian spelling of Jock.

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 12:22 PM

I thought you were one of the haggis-fed Scots and instead it turns out you're a spaghetti-fed Italian. Will wonders never cease?!?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 12:30 PM

Nah it's easier than that mate, Mudcat wouldn't let me register as Jock because it is taken, so I used my Italian friend's way of spelling it instead.

Mangare molto pommadori altri pommerigi [Or something like that!]

G

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 12:54 PM

"Mangare molto pommadori altri pommerigi"

Are you allowed to say that on television?

Subject: RE: BS: Staying on topic in threads.
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 13 Feb 08 - 12:57 PM

500