BS: George Bush library

Subject: BS: George Bush library
From: kendall
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 07:28 AM

CONTENTS OF THE GEORGE W. BUSH PRESIDENTIAL LIBRARY:


The George W. Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages.
.
The Library will include:

The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction.
The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you won't be able to remember anything.
The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don't even have to show up.
The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don't let you in.
The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don't let you out.
The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.
The National Debt room which is huge and has no ceiling.
The 'Tax Cut' Room with entry only to the wealthy.
The 'Economy Room' which is in the toilet.
The Iraq War Room. After you complete your first tour, they make you go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes fifth tour.
The Dick Cheney Room, in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shotgun gallery.
The Environmental Conservation Room, still empty.
The Supreme Court's Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.
The Airport Men's Room, where you can meet some of your favorite Republican Senators.
The 'Decision Room' complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.
The No CARB Exercise Room - No Cheney, No Ashcroft, No Rumsfeld, No Bush and definitely, No Rice.
The museum will also have an electron microscope to help you locate the President's accomplishments.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Riginslinger
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 08:25 AM

They could have a shelf containing the books GWB has read!

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: MaineDog
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 09:07 AM

That's in the economy room across the short wall.
MD

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: catspaw49
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 09:12 AM

Somebody get in touch with WalksaboutVerse. He says he "gifts" his life works to libraries all the time and gawd knows this is just the place for work like his.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 09:22 AM

Does anyone think george has read any books cover to cover. I see a shelf of Cliff Notes.

Catspaw! Cellar!

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: WFDU - Ron Olesko
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 09:37 AM

Maybe a copy of Mad Libs next to a toliet would be sufficent.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 10:11 AM

If they wanted to include all the books that have been written ABOUT the Bush administration, the library would be bigger than the West Wing.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 10:27 AM

Thank you for all the exhibit details.

I have the rendering of the actual GWB Library/monuemt that is to be erected on the grounds of the former Jefferson Memorial.
http://usera.imagecave.com/donuel/don/bushm.jpg

The Sculpter and Archetict Don Hakman was not paid for his design when it was discovered that he had lied to Monica Goodling about being aa Democrat.
It was decided that replacing a statue of a liberal Jefferson with America's greatest neo conservative killed two birds with one stone.

Speaking of birds, there will not be a bird problem like the Lincoln Memorial with bird poop on Abe's head, since electrified mesh covers every place a bird could perch on the GWB Library/Memorial/Chapel.

The Chapel will hold more people than the National Cathedral. All of the Library's various rooms are more accurately Gift Shops that help support the facility and pensions of the former Bush administration and Mega Church, without which construction could not have begun.

Some items you can buy in the gift shop:
plastic_turkey
Liquor
Bush Legacy Map



Some have felt that the central Memorial Mausoleum was a bit premature but the space is going to good use for Displaay booths of private contractors, Weapon manufacturers and the Carlyle Group.



Leading into the Memorial Pyramid structure is the Great Hall of Halliburton. Similar to Catherine the Great's Amber room the Hall of Halliburton is entirely decorated with Iraq Museum artifacts.

IT has its own highway, gas station, and Presidential Yacht
highway
Gas
yacht


You should see the painting collection, I wasn't supposed to take photos but maybe I'll show you whats in the warehouse later.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Alice
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 10:27 AM

From the movie "Clueless"
"That's a famous quote."
"From what?"
"From Cliff Notes."

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 10:50 AM

The gift stores also will have:
9-11 Flag

Runsfeld poster

Bush and Laura CD

Here we see the opening ceremony of the portrait gallery
Portrait gallery


Katrina Room New Orleans Music


Behind the Memorial Library are the famous Bush Gardens
Bush gardens


Here is a display in the Great Halliburton Hall where a tribute to privitization and outsourcing to good friends is shown in detail
http://usera.imagecave.com/donuel/don/bushsalerense.jpg
Private Exon Army

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 10:54 AM

Outsourcing Success

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: katlaughing
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 11:08 AM

Donuel, you have outdone yourself! That gas one should be published asap!!!

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 11:13 AM

Bush Hero Movie

Hero of Falluja


New Presidential Fashion Coat

Rove Gift Shop




as you see I found some of the old cartoons I made.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: katlaughing
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 02:02 PM

Kendall, here's what a friend of mine said when I sent this to him:

You can not begin to know how happy I was when the University of Texas's attempt to get the Bush library failed. I even called them and told them I didn't want an abomination like that in my town.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 03:30 PM

I wonder what Classification Scheme will be used -- perhaps Cutter's Expansive Classification? Will it have an automated catalog or the old, Conservative, card catalog? Will fines be compassionately forgiven?

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 03:40 PM

They employ the Alexandrian library system

What hasn't been burned has been shredded.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: PoppaGator
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 05:37 PM

They really should include a copy of that children's book he continued reading to kindergartners during the 9-11 attacks.

Anyone remember the title? It was in the news at the time...

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Riginslinger
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 06:58 PM

I doubt if he's actually read the Bible, but he leans on it a lot.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: katlaughing
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 07:32 PM

"Met Pet Goat" A full five minutes and more: clickety.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Michael Harrison
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 07:50 PM

kendall - brilliant stuff; just great!

katlaughing - if I am correct, SMU turned him down as well - at least, there was a campus outcry when the university made it public that the sleeze-bag contacted them to build it there.

Maybe he'll share the library moniker with Rove and Cheney and they can build it on the grounds of Haliburton headquarters. Cheers.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 07:55 PM

They gonna have free colorin' books and crayons???

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 07:55 PM

Poppagator I have 2 versions of that book
stay tuned


ps I'm competing with ghosts

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Charley Noble
Date: 28 Aug 08 - 08:24 PM

What, no Global Warming waiting room?

Very thoughtful thread!

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 29 Aug 08 - 07:00 PM

The Bush Library?

One childrens' book entitled "Mr. Stoopid goes to War".

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Riginslinger
Date: 29 Aug 08 - 10:19 PM

He only read one book, and it was full of holes!

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Acorn4
Date: 30 Aug 08 - 08:44 AM

"Geography for Dummies"

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Aug 08 - 09:55 AM

George W Bush will wrote a tell all book in his own words from his perspective (a pissed off dissillusioned teenager) who learns that the game is rigged from top to bottom and that there has been no such thing as an American Presidency since JFK.

Nixon was told to do certain things by the true power brokers but the transition to shadow goverment was snagged by the COnstitution and a couple reporters. Each Presidency is exposed as a front in interesting detail.

The US presidency has become a figurehead as powerless as the Queen of England. The idea of an Imperial PResidency was just to insulate the shadow goverment from any scrutiny at all.

He recounts the night in the White House when this was all explained to him back in 2000. He refused to believe this and when he lost his temper and ordered the men out of his office it was explained in a way that he could understand. They beat the shit out of him.

The next day there was a cover story about pretzels and choking but the defeated look on his face was enough to see the truth.

The book was never published and was written in such poor broken english that it was taken to be a high school assignment for years until the manuscript was seen for what it was by one Cat Spaw, who was never heard from again.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 05:58 AM

""He recounts the night in the White House when this was all explained to him back in 2000. He refused to believe this and when he lost his temper and ordered the men out of his office it was explained in a way that he could understand. They beat the shit out of him.""

On the face of it, this is an entirely credible scenario, as long as one is able to suspend one's rational thought capacity for long enough to believe in Geedub HAVING, let alone obeying, a conscience.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 09:49 AM

Yes I agree but to put a finer point on it...

The man knows his limitations and is fairly defensive of an ego that is easily bruised by the truth of his shorcomings.
What we might think of as a conscience, he feels as a pride that he was right all along. His railing against the system that his dad helped along, was more of a self defense than a defense of the Constitution of the United States.


The defeat for him that night in the White House was crushing because he now knew he had not outdone his father but quite the opposite. All he had left was finishing a war that his father was critisized for not finishing. He was so vulnerable and easily manipulated at this point that nothing would dter him except for personal legal liabilities.


It wasn't the first time a president likely recieved the truth talk, but it may have been the first time that was was physically beaten when words did not seem to penetrate.

My wife is against my expanding this piece of fiction into anything larger but given the cycles of anxiety and acting out by George Bush over the next couple years a compelling case could be made. Rove and Cheney may have played good cop and only friend in DC so that George did everything they said.

The only times he became totally infuriated was when he was asked to reverse a public promise. His promise was the last scrap of honor that was left to him and even that was eventually torn from him.

You see by portraying Bush in this way we basicly see a child betrayed once again until he virtually becomes a sympathetic figure.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 10:14 AM

A symaptheitc and pathetic figure...

and not the hero that revisionist films always portray.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Mark Ross
Date: 31 Aug 08 - 03:52 PM

"Actually, his library in Crawford Texas burned down......, both books, and he hadn't even finished coloring one of them!"

Utah Phillips 2001




Mark Ross

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Riginslinger
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 12:41 PM

"George W Bush will wrote a tell all book in his own words from his perspective (a pissed off dissillusioned teenager) who learns that the game is rigged from top to bottom and that there has been no such thing as an American Presidency since JFK."



                   There was Jimmy Carter!

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: DougR
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 02:29 PM

I have been authorized to accept donations of any amount to the GWB Library at SMU in Dallas. Send your checks to me and I will see that the donation is forwarded to the proper person there. Make them out to "Cash" please. Thank you very much.

DougR

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: DougR
Date: 01 Sep 08 - 09:38 PM

I just checked my mailbox and there wasn't a single check in it to support the GWB library and I felt a bit vexed. Then I remembered that it's Labor Day and there is no mail delivery today. I'll bet Mudcatter donations for the library will fill up my PO Box tomorrow!

Thank you in advance for your generous support!

DougR

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: DougR
Date: 02 Sep 08 - 01:50 AM

Aw shoot. You guys are no fun at all.

DougR

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: DougR
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 12:59 AM

Well, still no donations. I'm getting discouraged.

DougR

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 05:40 AM

I have some strange US currency left over from my last trip across the pond. There is an effigy of Abraham Lincoln on one side.

Would you like this for the GWB Library fund, Doug ?

I would have to send it "collect", you understand.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 08:12 AM

The storm and convention sort of has us all pixelated. I am sure our donations will start rolling in once we gain more resolution.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: DougR
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 06:42 PM

Well I'm about to resign my position with the library. Nobody seems to want to donate to the library. Shoot shucks.

DougR

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 06:56 PM

We'd all be willing to donate Doug, providing that you absolutely guarantee that he WILL LIE BURIED on a permanent basis.

Oh...and could you find a nice plot for Gordon Brown while you are at it.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: George Bush library
From: Bobert
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 07:29 PM

This just in... Good news and bad news...

The good news is that George W is gonna release his million or so secret documents and emails to be kept in his library...

The bad news is that the library is being designed with no actual, ahhhhhh, doors...

B;~(