BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.

Subject: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Acorn4
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 10:44 AM

She's gone,alas, alack, but who can possibly fill the void.

Robbie Savage?


Any other suggestions?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 10:49 AM

Russell Brand?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Acorn4
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 10:52 AM

Word of explanation to non UK TV watchers.

Carol Vorderman, until a couple of days ago, featured on a Quiz programme called "Countdown", in which contestants had to make the longest possibe word from letters provided or work out complicated mathematical calculations. Carol had incredible mental arithmetic skills and was able to work blindingly fast in her head.

Robbie Savage is a footballer who when playing for Leicester City, sustained a knock on the head. When this happens the referee has to stop the game and ask the injured player a question to see if they are OK to carry on.

The ref asked Robbie :"Who is the Prime Minister?" - Robbie was duly stretchered off the pitch - so not a serious suggestion!

VBut who could replace her?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Acorn4
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 10:53 AM

or Peter Andre

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Paul Burke
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 12:06 PM

Jade Goody
The Chuckle Brothers
Sooty
Archie Andrews
Eddie Waring
Angus Deayton
Lucy Mangan

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Acorn4
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 12:14 PM

K9 out of Dr Who would be OK I suppose!

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 03:03 PM

Well I'm available they only have to ask!

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Art Thieme
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 07:47 PM

Guess I misread the title of the thread. I thought you were saying the poor girl was a "replicant!"

Well, never mind!

Art

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Zany Mouse
Date: 14 Nov 08 - 08:32 PM

Any idea why she left?

Rhiannon

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Acorn4
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 03:55 AM

They were going to cut her salary by 90% - pity no one thought of this with Jonathan Ross.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 05:42 AM

Joan Rivers or Bette Middler, or anyone with a bit of attitude, then it might attract an audience who are actually alive, or maybe they just like it that way.

Bernard Manning would have made a good host, he would have been even better on ' The Weakest Link, ' you are the weakest link, now fuck off.

eric

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 06:14 AM

Don't you think that programme is offensive enough already, Eric?

XG

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: GUEST,Bill the Collie
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 06:53 AM

must be some software that can do the calculations

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 09:08 AM

They both cater to the right audience John.

eric

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 09:34 AM

will she still be doing the loan adverts:-

'All that we ask is that you're skint and a complete scuffler and we can repossess your car, house and firstborn child - and throw you out on the street......'

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 03:18 PM

I'd like to see Posh Becks trying for the part, just for the look on her face when she has to do the numbers...

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 15 Nov 08 - 03:45 PM

Ooooooooooh ! A saucer of milk for you , George.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 03:15 AM

I'd like to see ' Posh Becks ' attempt find a consonant, or a vowel.

eric

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: r.padgett
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 03:59 AM

Irreplaceable?

Of course have been some fine past contestants on Countdown and quite young too, so why not trawl there?

I saw this just the other day with Des O'Connor and the lovely librarian who has been a tremendous asset over the years and the angle of discussing words and derivations is an absolute must

However this is no longer the "must see" following the death of Richard Whiteley

The prog needs a bit of a make over and stimulation to kick start it again ~ the timing of the show form it prime place was the first error

I see Richard and Judy [or rather i don't] has gone to a new station that I can't get ~ why?

Ray

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 04:47 AM

I don't know, are you still on 405 lines?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 05:48 AM

Posh Becks thinks vowels are something she has to empty regularly, in order to keep her stick insect shape.

You mean Susie Dent, Ray, a lovely lass, with understated sex appeal [can I say that?] [I think I just did!]

XG

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 06:07 AM

Susie Dent - i find her a bit underwhelming. she reminds me a bit of Jeremy Irons in episode one of Brideshead. permanently startled bunny rabbit eyes.

one things sure John, if you could get her to talk dirty - she'd know all the words.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 08:26 AM

For anyone who remembers the Golden Shot, it has to be Anne Aston (Ashton). her arithmetic skills were legendary

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: goatfell
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 10:35 AM

Jonathon Ross, but then they would need someone who speak english, and with a brain

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 16 Nov 08 - 01:59 PM

The thing is, there are not many people who can juggle the numbers like that, it's a pretty remarkable skill.

And the other thing that would be hard to match is Carol Vorderman's dress sense...

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Sooz
Date: 17 Nov 08 - 03:40 AM

I'll do it!
Although I'd insist on wearing my own clothes!

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: melodeonboy
Date: 17 Nov 08 - 06:32 AM

There's a hilarious spoof advert for the job in a fairly recent copy of Viz. I'll see if I can find it.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 17 Nov 08 - 08:20 AM

Sad old git that I am I once sent a "poem" to the late Richard Whiteley (well,to the producer) which was read out apparently (tho' I didn't se that episode!).It went:
JOB APPLICATION
I don't want to replace old Richard,
Beloved of students and mums
I don't want to replace young Carol,
Quite frankly, I can't do the sums.
I don't want to be a contestant
As word games are not quite my bent.
Just put me in Dictionary Corner,
So I can sit near Susie Dent.

RtS
(Andrew Morion eat your heart out).

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 17 Nov 08 - 08:27 AM

Sarah Palin?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 17 Nov 08 - 11:18 AM

*hmmmmphffff!*

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Mr Red
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 10:38 AM

Johnny Ball is a mathematicalist - as well as a comedian.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 10:56 AM

It's not about being a mathematician, it's about having that trick with juggling the numbers. I doubt if Einstein could have done that too well.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 10:58 AM

Johnny Ball fails on two big points.

1 He isn't funny

and

2 He fathered Zoe Ball.

Sort of hard to forgive him for the latter, the former is common.


XG ¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: GUEST,Tunesmith
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 04:15 PM

All these postings about Carol, and not one reference to her bum! Why, there are whole websites devoted to her derriere.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 04:29 PM

I watch her for her brain

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Big Mick
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 04:33 PM

For those of us who wouldn't know who she is, Have a look. Here and I thought she was a singer or something....***chuckle***.

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 18 Nov 08 - 04:36 PM

Told ya she was good at figures

¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: GUEST,Ed
Date: 21 Nov 08 - 10:15 AM

Apparently it's going to be an Oxford Maths graduate Rachel Riley.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: GUEST,Tunesmith
Date: 21 Nov 08 - 10:23 AM

Never mind the maths' degree. Has she got a shapely bum?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: goatfell
Date: 21 Nov 08 - 10:47 AM

russel brand isn't funny either he's just a wee child, but then there are some smart children out there, just because he uses big words and phrases, doesn't make you smart, he just childish like his fans

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Acorn4
Date: 21 Nov 08 - 11:12 AM

Apparently there's now talk of Dr Who being transmogrified into female form for the next reincarnation. What about Carol V for that?

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: cptsnapper
Date: 21 Nov 08 - 09:15 PM

She should take over Russell Brand's slot on Radio 2

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: GUEST,Mr Red
Date: 22 Nov 08 - 07:12 AM

well she has the CV! And I have seen her sing.

& the next number is................

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: GUEST,Comrac
Date: 22 Nov 08 - 07:30 AM

Maybe we will get a presenter that isn´t the full of the screen.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Schantieman
Date: 22 Nov 08 - 03:33 PM

Love that pic of Carol. Looks like that diamante clasp is under a bit of strain...

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 21 Jan 09 - 07:26 AM

Well what do you think of her replacement? Nice but dim, extremely tall AND wears high heals, doesn't seem to be able to solve the maths problems...if you ask me; but you weren't so I'll get my coat!

Sal

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 21 Jan 09 - 08:46 AM

Haven't seen her yet Sal, but TV is not noted for hiring ladies because of the size of their brains.
TV is ageist and sexist in the extreme. Ask poor Moira Stewart!

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 21 Jan 09 - 10:14 AM

Nice legs but those heels are a mistake (IMHO). Never wear anything higher than cuban with a short skirt (and Never heels with shorts) ladies...(call me Gok Kwan). She doesn't seem to put up the best selected word either, for those of us who are a bit Mutt & Jeff and don't alwayd hear it. They're all a long way away from each other so contestants have to show each other their matching results. I've only seen a couple of the new shows, perhaps they'll grow into it. The new presenter seems a bit creepy to me! Glad they got rid of the beach tent set with unsold fireplace surrounds.

RtS
(Dressed by Man at Army Surplus)

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 21 Jan 09 - 11:26 AM

No indications at all that she is in any way dim.

That board needs raising so that she doesn't have to stoop, especially with those high heels.

Subject: RE: BS: Carol Vorderman replacement.
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 22 Jan 09 - 07:11 PM

If they raise the board they'll have to move the camera back so that it all fits into the tv screen!

When ever I've seen her doing the numbers she askes the competitors to do the sums, and never seen her do one on her own, or even get it right! If they can't do it, neither can she.

Sal