BS: What does a chicken think about?

Subject: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:28 PM

What do you think? Do they get beyond mundane stuff like the weather, what's to eat today, and "Did you just see that?" Do they delve into abstractions? Do they have political concerns? What do they think about just after they've been beheaded? And for how long?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:34 PM

Col. Sanders must DIE!

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: olddude
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:43 PM

LOL
that and feed me feed me ... my friends chickens beg for anything.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:52 PM

Danny Bhoy does an excellent chicken joke but I couldn't find it on YT because I would have to sort thru too many vids. BTW, YT him... the lad is goooood!

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Leadfingers
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:55 PM

I'm not eggzactly sure !!

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bert
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:59 PM

They are concerned about hawks.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:00 PM

Luck for you I have a recording of a typical chicken's brainwaves for a typical day. For your benefit I have translated them into English.


Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Here comes the egg.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Look for food.
Look for food.

Oh! A bug! mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Look for food.
Look for food.

Oh! A bug! mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Look for food.
Look for food.

Oh! A bug! mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

What is that on the ground?
Fast moving shadow?

Better panic!

Must be a haw.......

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:00 PM

Traffic?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:04 PM

Why to pluck do you want to know?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:07 PM

Why? Well, I feel it would help me gain more insight into the avian lifestyle, see?

Good stuff, folks. I knew I could get help here.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:10 PM

I thought it was just a yolk, but now I know you're really interested, it's all white.
Sorry about the battery of horrhendous puns (not)

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:19 PM

Chicken Hawks?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:20 PM

Roosters think about sex.

Hens think "Here comes that fuckin' rooster again!"

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:21 PM

Yer generic chickens are shit at spotting hawks. Ya need a proper "chicken" fer that. My buddy used ta keep some Guinea Hens to "protect" his chickens. Chickens at least know that when a Guinea Hen screeches and runs for cover, sommat may be amiss.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Don Firth
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:23 PM

Well, considering that some scientists believe that the modern domestic barnyard chicken evolved (or devolved) from the Tyrannosaurus Rex, they may have delusions of grandeur. Not unlike my neighbor's Yorkshire terrier who thinks he's the Hound of the Baskervilles.

With the basic reptile brain, I tend to think that, politically, chickens are Republicans.

Their last thought just after the ax falls is, "Hey! Wait a minute! This isn't how it's supposed to be—!"

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:34 PM

Certainly when it comes to dealing with the Tea Party, Republicans are chickens.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:34 PM

chicken breast implants.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:44 PM

Butterballs?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:45 PM

They think of this - aka chicken's revenge:



Eating chicken may lead to a smaller penis

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:51 PM

Why do so many people want to eat me?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 03:58 PM

Spaw should be made to eat chicken at least 3 times a day.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 04:01 PM

Ed... Small dick? (NO, I am not asking, I am referring to your dink... errr, LINK.) At least it won't affect the Irish much. I am baking breaded chicken legs next week and it don't bother me er me buddy at all.

Now... WIF believes anyone actually studied this? If there are docs who actually did studies, revoke their degrees.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Gurney
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 04:01 PM

Smaller penis, Ed T? I looked up that link, and it says that farmers use phthalate on chickens.
You live and learn, here!

I'd never have dreamed that farmers would be so concerned about chooks getting melanoma!

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 04:06 PM

Spaw needs to be force-fed chicken! Lots of chicken. The world needs a break from all his penile boasting, and he wouldn't need the wheelbarrow any longer either.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 04:21 PM

Well gnu, maybe it means smaller than possible size, not smaller than the general population?

But, if a old red rooster is not a regular visiter to the chicken coop, it may a trivial matter anyway?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bobert
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 04:35 PM

Most chickens don't get old enough for their brains to develop so their ain't a lot of thinking goin' on with them... The ones that are allowed to develop into adulthood do develop personalities and intelligence... I still don't think they actually do much thinkin', however, since their lives are limited to eating, staying out of the road and laying an occasional egg (hens, that is)...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ed T
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 04:37 PM

Is that hens or Henz, Bobertz?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 05:02 PM

Ed... "But, if a old red rooster is not a regular visiter to the chicken coop, it may a trivial matter anyway?"

Hahahahahaa! (For those that don't know, I have been celibrate for over 15 years.)

Yes, celibRate.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 05:18 PM

ummm...a mutant dwarf gnome turkey?

GfS

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bill D
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 06:33 PM

It all depends... some think about thinking.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bill D
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 06:40 PM

And chemistry is doing things you wouldn't believe!

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 07:03 PM

Bill... link shows blank page fron Date: 04 Jan 13 - 06:33 PM

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bill D
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 07:19 PM

which one? hmmm.. both show for me...if others can't see them I'll copy them and put them on my images site,

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 07:34 PM

I couldn't get the first one onscreen, Bill.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bill D
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 08:05 PM

hmmm... tomorrow. Not crucial... just fun

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: olddude
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 08:07 PM

How did he get to the other side of the road

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Ebbie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 08:14 PM

I used to have chickens and I can tell you that they are capable of feeling contentment and satisfaction. Which at least implies that they are capable of the opposite.

I swear- the older I get the less I am comfortable with being an omnivore.

Do you suppose asparagus and dandelions suffer? Maybe I'd better switch to peaches, tomatoes, apples, peas, carrots, potatoes and nuts.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 08:20 PM

Dan... a similar question was asked by Mum at a family BBQ years ago. She asked asked how the ducks got into the backyard because it was fenced in. She is still embarrassed.

As for the chicken, it crossed on the walk signal.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 08:26 PM

I am also less and less comfortable with eating meat as the years go by...for both ethical reasons and health reasons.

I have periodically switched to a vegetarian diet, but you have to work at it, because it's not as "convenient", the way this society is set up. I experienced good results in health whenever I did it for a period of time

Have also known people who've been vegetarian all their lives, and they're just as healthy as the people who eat meat, and probably moreso in most cases. Meat is simply a convenient custom and habit for most of us, not something we actually need to eat to stay healthy and strong. We're used to it, that's all.

I make an exception for people in far northern climates, however. I think the natural conditions make it necessary for them to eat a diet with quite a bit of meat and fat in it, in order to combat the cold. Vegetarianism is best suited to warm and moderate climates...which are the places where the plant world thrives best anyway, and can provide all the food that is needed.

I suspect that chickens are actually pretty smart when they get a chance to use their intelligence. Most birds are, so why not chickens? Like other creatures, they learn from experience. If they are denied all natural experience, then they won't learn much at all.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Janie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 09:10 PM

The last chicken I had a close encounter with apparently was thinking it wanted to play "chicken" with the front end of my car.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Janie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 09:29 PM

I don't know what they think about, but they apparently are pretty smart. One offering among many from a Google search.

Previously, here on our own Mudcat, we established the important role these amazing animals played in the development of western culture.

the history of Great Britain

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: gnu
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 09:52 PM

Gramps hit a chicken with his "T" back in the early 20s. He stopped and took it to the farmhouse it obviously came from and offered to pay for it. The farmer demanded an outrageous price and Gramps didn't blink. He wrote him a cheque on open paper with "payment in full" on the back and asked the farmer to sign it. He did, gladly, of course. Gramps took the family home, went back to the farm and took a half dozen more chickens, killing them all by snapping their necks. When the farmer confronted him, Gramps said, "Paid in full... you signed it." And, I knew Gramps... I am near sure he added, "Fuck off." He was a big SOB... a gentle giant that helped out many people during the depression of the 30s and he didn't take kindly to assholes.

Further, I became close friends with the grandson of that farmer so many years later but I never told him of that incident. Odd how some things work out, innit?

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Janie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 10:10 PM

When I sadly hit the aforementioned chicken I also stopped, gnu. Knocked on the door of the very old and dilapidated farmhouse with considerable trepidation. The older, disheveled woman who came to the door remarked emphatically and with all seriousness, "I done told them chickens, told 'em again and again to stay out of the road." Then, shaking her head, and I wasn't sure if it was with sadness or disgust, "they just won't listen."

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Bert
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 10:44 PM

Thanks for the History of Great Britain link Janie. Mudcat was good in those days.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Janie
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 11:57 PM

Yer welcome, Bert. Amazing to me that this thread brought that thread to mind, and that I took the time to search for it.

I often find myself wondering just when it was I, and many but not all of the rest of us, forgot how to play.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: number 6
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 11:59 PM

"What does a chicken think about?"

wishes it was a dove.

biLL

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Janie
Date: 05 Jan 13 - 12:06 AM

or perhaps it wishes it was a little hawk.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: GUEST,999
Date: 05 Jan 13 - 10:17 AM

Boy chickens think about girl chickens and the converse. But then some boy chickens think about boy chickens and some girl chickens think about girl chickens. Then of course some chickens called roosters and hens think about offing Colonel Sanders (as was mentioned previously) and some think about why they crossed the road (which was also mentioned previously, I think) and still others think about who put the bomp in the bomp shu bomp shu bomp. It is the latter category that fascinates me because I think about that, too.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: Jeri
Date: 05 Jan 13 - 10:30 AM

Perhaps there never was a time when there was no "bomp" in the "shu bomp". Perhaps, if time really is dounut shaped, as it's rumored to be, it was always there.

Subject: RE: BS: What does a chicken think about?
From: GUEST,Frug
Date: 05 Jan 13 - 11:08 AM

"Cluck all"