BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...

Subject: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 27 Mar 13 - 07:46 PM

...or are they apes? Yeah, that's right. They're apes, damn it, not monkeys! So stop callin' us Chimps "monkeys", you damn, dirty humans!!!

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Bobert
Date: 27 Mar 13 - 08:16 PM

What??? You run outta bananas, Chongz???

Of course you are a monkey... Just look in the mirror, dude...

But hey... As far as monkeys go yer okay in my book... Some of the time, that is...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Sandy Mc Lean
Date: 27 Mar 13 - 08:27 PM

Monkeys get more tail than chimps! :-}

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Mar 13 - 08:37 PM

Chonga is a monkey. A howler, most likely, from the way s/he screams all the time while throwing poop at people who actually research his/her past and find The Truth About Chonga.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Megan L
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 05:05 AM

For all most of us know Chongo might be a pygmy marmoset with delusions of grandeur.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: MMario
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 05:28 AM

I think Megan may be onto something. it *would* explain a few things from over the years...

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 05:39 AM

A tail hating pigmy monkey! Yes that explains a lot!

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: gnu
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 05:43 AM

A chimp-pansy?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Musket
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 05:51 AM

But in order for a chimp to evolve into another monkey, they'd have to be an atheist, surely?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 05:53 AM

A chimp-pansy?

LOL LOL LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: gnu
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 07:14 AM

Musket... hahahaa.

JtS... I only say that because he uses such flowery language.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 08:25 AM

Wot, not because he's a pansy?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 09:26 AM

Not at all, Musket! I would estimate that at least 95% of all the religious people in this municipality do believe in evolution...and half of the other 5% haven't even thought about it, so their opinion is null and void. Now, if I were living in Arkansas, it might be different...but I'm not.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Musket sans cookie
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 09:33 AM

Would it take evolution for irony to become existent over the pond?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 09:42 AM

I don't know. Why don't you see if you can get a Royal Commission put in place to find out?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 10:03 AM

Get a grant to study it. In fact, get a couple of bottles and we'll share.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Musket sans cookie
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 10:40 AM

No Royal commissions are flawed as they try to prove a hypothesis rather than observe the evidence.

Which makes them perfect if you want to prove religion is relevant to others. ..

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Sandy Mc Lean
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 10:43 AM

But ya gotta get the proper grant! Get three grants and I'll join you and Rap in that study.
Grants

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 11:28 AM

NOW you're getting into territory Chongo can relate to.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 12:23 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 12:25 PM

(Ooops)

Chumpo's not alone...

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 12:33 PM

Oh, dear...

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Sandy Mc Lean
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 02:05 PM

Family ties between Chongo and Shane become harder to deny............

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: gnu
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 02:14 PM

CBC 1 is talking about the issue of politics/religion/moral issues/self righteousness with a psych prof doing studies. Perhaps not PARTICULARLY germain to this thread but bees and ants and wasps and termites besides apes are the only ones that DO do things with each other. BUT, he specifically states that you will NEVER see two chimp-pansys carrying a log together... snippets... fascinating. If there is a call-in portion, you could call in LH and discuss your thoughts?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: gnu
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 02:24 PM

Pete's vid link... I had to turn that off immediately. Sick prick feeding an animal booze? Call the SPCA!

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 03:28 PM

" Would it take evolution for irony to become existent over the pond? "

Good irony requires a ring of truth and at least a hint of humour.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 03:36 PM

BUT, he specifically states that you will NEVER see two chimp-pansys carrying a log together.

I think that would depend on getting two chimps to see the point of moving a log.

They do hunt together, a much more complex coordinated activity.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 03:42 PM

Yeah, they hunt other chimps and eat them.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 03:44 PM

"No Royal commissions are flawed as they try to prove a hypothesis rather than observe the evidence.

Which makes them perfect if you want to prove religion is relevant to others. .. "

It would take a Royal commission to observe humour in your comments.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 06:59 PM

I understand how you feel, Chongo. Years ago I acquired a camouflage painted Subaru wagon from a professional wrestler called, "Rouben Barzoun, the Human Baboon".

The confusion was just terrible. Especially since he'd written an autobiography called "God is My Tag-Team Partner". My girlfriend wouldn't date me anymore and I was voted out of my co-op. So I joined Scientology, and when they saw my car, I got kicked out of that, too.

I finally traded in for one of those pink "Mary Kay Cosmetics" Cadillacs that had been in an accident, and was able to get a job selling Amway.

Nowadays, I just say, "I'm a Bonabo, Dammit, a BONABO!!"

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 09:11 PM

Good to hear from ya, Bongo. Yeah, there is a lotta specism goin' on out there. Some of it's unconscious specism, but that's no excuse. As for deliberate specism, as seen in many of the scurrilous comments above, that's just downright intolerable! Wait till I get elected. Then the fur is gonna fly! My Equalization Proclamation is gonna give American specists 2 choices:

1. Mend their ways and smarten up.
2. Deportation. They will be dropped offa helicopters over impoverished countries that hate the USA...like Somalia, for example...and they can explain themselves to the local folks there and see how they do.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Mar 13 - 11:27 PM

Chimp-pansies (I like that!) (P. Troglodytes, et al.) are simply the failed byproducts of Nature's evolutionary experiments, which reached its zenith in Homo Sapiens Sapiens.

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 12:00 AM

Don't send them to Africa! My family and I are from the Congo, and I can tell you first hand that those "Homeless Sapients" have created more than enough trouble there. Send them to Antarctica. The penguins love them. They think they look cute when they're dressed in tuxedos.

PS--Someone pointed out that I'd misspelled bonobo. What do you want from me? I'm not an English teacher, I'm a bonobo, dammit, A BONOBO!

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Musket
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 06:35 AM

Humour.

Now we are talking...

Primates fling shit at each other. Then they evolve into humans. (Not quite what happens but hey, speaking to people who think a virgin can have a child here...) Then they carry on flinging shit at each other.

Then some of the semi evolved ones need to see a reason for flinging shit at each other. Then they find a reason. Then the more evolved ones sigh.

Nothing left to do except fling a little shit I suppose...

Hello Sailor!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 08:01 AM

Humans gotta be the most puffed-up, conceited, pretentious, self-righteous creatures that ever crawled out of a cave! Look at 'em! They eat too much, they talk too much, they own too much, and they ARE too much! Too much of everything except a little common sense. They've made a mess of the world, but we apes are gonna straighten things out when we get in power. King Kong was on the right track. If he'd-a found you in his path, Musket, he woulda stepped on you, and they coulda used you afterward as a display item called "the human pancake".

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Musket
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 09:00 AM

Pancake? Naw, I'd be a huge pizza...

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 09:45 AM

HUMANS are puffed up??!! How'd that inspection turn out for you, Chonga?

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Stim
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 10:31 AM

They didn't crawl out of the caves, Chongo, Homo Erectus stood up (And what was the "scientist" who came up with that name thinking about?) banged his head on a stalactite and staggered out into the natural world, brain-injury and all. It's been all downhill since then, which has been good for the "Homeless Sapients", because they can't climb worth a crap...

And Musket, you humans lie about conception all the time. So don't drag me into that ongoing fight between your mother and "father", I'm a bonobo, dammit, A BONOBO!

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 10:57 AM

Sorry for accidentally posting under your name Stim, that was yours truly, Bongo Bimp!

I was addressing you, and your insensitive, unfeeling comments about atheists on another thread, and got things very confused. Those things happen on the internet. I hope you were not inconvenienced. Anyway, I'm not a social media expert, I'm a bonabo, dammit, A BONOBO!

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 29 Mar 13 - 01:23 PM

You tell 'em, Bongo!

Now consider if I was to grab Musket by his heels, swing him around good a couple times, and throw him off the top of a real tall buiding and watch him go "SPLAT!" on the pavement below...

THAT would be a genuine case of aggravated pooplinging!!! And the poor bastard wouldn't even be able to pray on the way down, cos it would be like the Ayatollah eatin' pork for him to yield to anything like that. Unthinkable!

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 30 Mar 13 - 01:06 PM

Rapparee. I bet that would drive them crazy...but on another thread more suitable to that!!!!

Regards,
GfS

Subject: RE: BS: Are Chimps really monkeys or...
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 30 Mar 13 - 01:20 PM

Chumpo's already crazy enough...