50 ways to leave - poorly named songs

Subject: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Andy7
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 04:28 AM

Paul Simon's "Fifty ways to leave your lover" only actually suggests 3 ways!

What other songs do you know that are poorly named?

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,Harry
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 04:46 AM

Chuck Berry's "Thirteen Question Method" only has ten questions.

Harry

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: JHW
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 06:57 AM

"I left my lover in bed smoking."

'That's the way to leave them'

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 08:38 AM

Paul Simon's "Fifty ways to leave your lover" only actually suggests 3 ways!

Sorry, Andy, it may not be 50 ways, but it's definitely more than three.

Off the top of my head:
Hop on the bus, Gus
Drop off the key, Lee
Make a new plan, Stan
Slip out the back, Jack
Don't need to be coy, Roy

That's five for starters.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,Andy7
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 11:48 AM

'Make a new plan' is just making a plan, it's not a way to leave.

And 'No need to be coy' may well be good advice, but it's not a way to leave either! :-)

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 03:59 PM

"Fifty" may not be the literal number of ways explicated in the song, but it's definitely the best word from a poetic standpoint. The two "f"s in "fifty" are followed by the two "l"s and two "v"s in "leave" and "lover". That's about as much alliteration and consonance as one can squeeze into one line without being silly.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: leeneia
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 07:25 PM

The Recruited Collier - it's a song sung by a woman about her plight after her young husband (or maybe fiance) has abandoned her. So why don't they call it "The Deserted Wife"?

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,Guest
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 07:35 PM

I am sure there are people more erudite than I that can explain to leeneia that the Recruited Collier is not about a young man deserting his wife but the desperate ways people had to resort to in order to support their loved ones.

It is stupid to judge traditional songs by today's PC world.

To a certain extent young men today are still drawn to the military as a way of giving their families a supposedly better life.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Jackaroodave
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 07:56 PM

Chuck Berry's "Brown-Eyed Handsome Man" should have been "Brown-Skinned Handsome Man," as Berry acknowledged; however, he felt the crossover audience? the industry decision makers? weren't ready for that yet (1956).

But since it was obvious what the song was really about, and obvious why it didn't get the appropriate title, Berry made his point in his typically sly and oblique way. So maybe it wasn't so poorly named--still a shame, though.

Lyrics here

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,Gerry
Date: 20 Jun 17 - 09:58 PM

Many versions of The Devil's Nine Questions have only eight questions.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Joe Offer
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 02:43 AM

And still I wonder, what does it matter? If it's a good song, I don't sweat the small stuff. And "50 Ways" is a terrific song.
-Joe-

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Mr Red
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 03:33 AM

Make a new plan' is just making a plan, it's not a way to leave.

Disagree! Telling someone to "making a new plan" is quite clearly a "sod off" statement. Some people try to soften the blow with more prosaic language.

I well remember a GF saying to me "that woman fancied you" - how oblique do you need it?

Another (soon to be) ex-SO said one day "I have rented a cottage" - they need a way to broach the subject - which is the premise of the song IMNSHO.

A lass I lived with for 10 years spent 5 years being contentious, hoping I would get fed up. When I did she changed her mind!

50 is such a small number but it is alliterative, though 55 would have been moreso. All of which just proves that Paul Simon is a master wordsmith. Gives us 5 examples and we add the rest! We nod in agreement.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Senoufou
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 04:13 AM

Haha Mr Red! Like "It's not you, it's me." or "I love you but I'm not in love with you." or "I need some space."

My young niece, who is a scream, sent a brief text to dump her (rather unpleasant) boyfriend, saying, "Got nu man. Soz."

I absolutely love and adore Paul Simon. (and his songs!)

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 04:20 AM

And 'No need to be coy' may well be good advice, but it's not a way to leave either! :-)
Yes, that's a way to leave. (even if written in the negative)
The way to leave is 'boldly' (not coyly)

To boldly go . . .

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Johnny J
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 04:51 AM

"Seven drunken nights"

Ronnie Drew: "We're only allowed to sing five of them...."

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Mr Red
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 07:44 AM

ex-wifey wrote me a letter for me to find when I got back after a trip to Canada to attend a family wedding.

By a quirk of fate the plane was late and I phoned her parents (eventually) and was told the key was with a neighbour.

The the letter read (ish) "It's over. The key is with Mr XXXX" which is hilarious when you consider I would not have had the key to the locked house.

We will soon be up to 51 ways to .......................

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Senoufou
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 08:30 AM

So the note was inside the house Mr Red? How very daft of her!

Jonny J, I've always been very frustrated not knowing what the other two Drunken Nights were about. The first five were obviously about the silly sod finding evidence of his wife's...er... extra-marital activities. So presumably, he found two other strange things on returning home. The mind can only boggle....
(I do so like to get to the bottom of things, being incurably curious by nature.)

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: michaelr
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 09:19 AM

I've got words for the other two nights. With variations, even.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 10:39 AM

Senoufou,

From Wikipedia:

Nights 6–7

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Senoufou
Date: 21 Jun 17 - 11:08 AM

Pwaaaaahahahahaaaaa! I should never have asked should I?
"Well, now you know!" as my mother would have said!

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Mr Red
Date: 22 Jun 17 - 05:26 AM

So the note was inside the house Mr Red? How very daft of her!

Yup. I found it hilarious, but when people have made their decision, logic does not figure largely. But don't get me started - the long view was much rosier.

Back to the thread - "Mairsie Dotes and Dosy Dotes" is pretty of the wall.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 22 Jun 17 - 05:43 AM


Back to the thread - "Mairsie Dotes and Dosy Dotes" is pretty of the wall.
"If the words seem queer, and funny to your ear,
A little bit jumbled and jivey,
Sing 'Mares eat oats'
And 'Does eat oats'
And 'little lambs eat ivy'"

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Senoufou
Date: 22 Jun 17 - 06:41 AM

'This Ole House' was played a lot on the radio in the fifties. I used to wonder why the owner didn't have time to fix the windows etc, being otherwise engaged in getting 'ready to meet the saints'. It took many years before I twigged that the house was in fact the mortal body.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,Mysha
Date: 22 Jun 17 - 06:55 AM

Hi,

I don't think the song is about ways to leave, but rather about the idea that there must be fifty (plenty) ways to do so. As it happens, a few ways are mentioned, but if the chorus had been

"Fifty ways, fifty ways,
There must be fifty ways;
Fifty ways, fifty ways,
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover."

- the song would have been equally valid. (But that's probably not Paul Simon's way of writing choruses.)

OK, so the song isn't titled "The concept of the existence of multiple methods to end a relationship", but then, Paul Simon tends to write what comes to him naturally.

Bye,
                                                                Mysha

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,matt milton
Date: 22 Jun 17 - 07:01 AM

It did occur to me once that someone could do a great cover of Simon's '50 Ways' adding verses that used increasingly more obscure and difficult-to-rhyme names.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: GUEST,Guest
Date: 22 Jun 17 - 08:01 PM

Apparently the recently late extraordinary Vin Garbutt made up songs for his grandchildren using there names.

One such name was Indigo and that flummoxed him to the extent that the song started.

Indigo, Indigo, Indigo ..................

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Joe Offer
Date: 23 Jun 17 - 01:53 AM

"50 Ways" came out in 1975, about the time my ex started trying to get rid of me. By the time she succeeded in 1992, she had come up with far more than 50 Ways. The song has always meant a lot to me.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Senoufou
Date: 23 Jun 17 - 03:47 AM

matt milton, how about:-

Leave me alone please, Aristoteles.
Get on the bus, Caractacus.
Take a pill, Kim Jong Il.
Tatty bye, Malachi.

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Mo the caller
Date: 23 Jun 17 - 12:26 PM

Hop on a plane, Jane
Crawl on your knees Eloise,
You can keep the canary, Mary
Just go,Jo

Subject: RE: 50 ways to leave - poorly named songs
From: Mr Red
Date: 24 Jun 17 - 02:34 AM

Leave in a barrel, Carol.
Jump on the refuse lorry, Corrie.
Find a new flat, Matt.
Be gone, Ron.
Find more space, Grace.
Take a running jump, Humph.
go on long walks, on short piers, Pierce.
go play with your organ! Morgan.

Now what led me to the last two?