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Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks
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Subject: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: bbelle Date: 17 Oct 00 - 08:09 PM HOW TO ANNOY FOLKS Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up." Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think." Practice making fax and modem noises. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc." them to your boss. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy." Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way." Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now." As much as possible: skip rather than walk. Ask people what gender they are. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. Sing along at the opera. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles." Send this list to everyone in your email address book even if they sent it to you or ask you not to send things like this. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,Betty Date: 17 Oct 00 - 08:27 PM Or, simply start a thread like this one. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: bigchuck Date: 17 Oct 00 - 08:41 PM Gee, Moon, this seems awfully familiar...almost like i'd seen it before. :>) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 17 Oct 00 - 08:46 PM Play a loud instrument a half beat behind everyone else. Go to concerts and tell everybody how great the performers used to be before this, that or the other happened. Send vegemite to overly flatulent individuals on the other end of the planet. Insist that your particular instrument is the last word in whatever. ie; ________isn't worth seeing without________. ______would be better if they had a __________player (Fill in the blanks with your own examples) All I could think of for now. Rich |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,Joerg Date: 17 Oct 00 - 08:47 PM *BG*, Jenny. :-D Joerg |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Art Thieme Date: 17 Oct 00 - 08:59 PM Say in as many Mudcat threads as possible that ALL goddam songs are folksongs ! Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: MK Date: 17 Oct 00 - 09:15 PM Start a thread called: HELP:Need To Learn Jazz Piano This Weekend (*BG*) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: bbelle Date: 17 Oct 00 - 09:18 PM Hey, Guest, Betty ... So why did you stop in? I couldn't have marked it any more clearly. Get with the program or don't let the door hit you in the arse on your way out. To the rest ... good 'uns, all. moonjen |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 17 Oct 00 - 09:23 PM Start a thread on the definition of folk music. Rich |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Art Thieme Date: 17 Oct 00 - 09:40 PM creep this thread into a definition of folksongs thread. Art |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: ddw Date: 17 Oct 00 - 09:46 PM Flame anybody who starts a thread you don't like. david |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 17 Oct 00 - 10:51 PM start a post that you don't fin |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: MK Date: 17 Oct 00 - 10:58 PM Sing or play : Doh, Ray, Mee, Fah, So, Lah, Ti.................and run away! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Matt_R Date: 17 Oct 00 - 11:01 PM Mention the "O" word around here. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: bbelle Date: 17 Oct 00 - 11:52 PM Now, now, Matt ... the word "O" could signify different things to different folks, i.e., "The Story of O" ... moonjen hauling her naughty self to bed |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Helen Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:01 AM Rich, am I ever going to be forgiven for sending Vegemite to a fartulous individual? Oh, woe is me! O me miserum! Mea culpa, mea culpa. (ha ha, I don't get any adverse effects from way over the Pacific Ocean) *grin* Helen |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Dave (the ancient mariner) Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:47 AM Start laughing loudly at a wedding service just when the minister says "and if anyone here knows just reason why these two should not be wed, let them speak now or forever hold their peace" (works every time mates) My wife always says "I cant take you anywhere twice" (well she does, but the second time is only to appologise)Aye. Dave |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: rabbitrunning Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:55 AM Sing "This is the song that never ends" or "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" under your breath all day and claim that someone else got you started when people complain. Whenever you're leading a bunch of singers, sing really really fast... |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: wysiwyg Date: 18 Oct 00 - 02:40 AM 1. Love is all it usually takes to make people trot out their worst uglinesses for a viewing. Not sure this is true annoyance but it usually looks much like it. 2. Loving them persistently, once they have done that which is indicated in #1, usually increases the apparent annoyance factor astronomically. (I don't mean those sloppy fuzzy feelings we call love, either, I mean LOVE IN ACTION.) 3. And use the J-word once too often, of course remembering that [too often] varies moment to moment, group to group, subject to subject, and place to place and depending on the phase of some planet somewhere. Thus one need not work overhard on this, and one use can be far more than is needed to accomplish one's annoyance goal. 4. [Insert verb of choice here] like you MIGHT use the J-word, or like you once did, or like someone else who once did. 5. Use the politically unpopular expression of the day that was JUST THE THING yesterday. 6. Stick around the Mudcat long enough that one person finds your stay too damn long and organizes a posse to root you (and your ilk) the hell out. 7. Act uncharacteristically acerbic when sweet goo is expected, or the reverse, especially flipping back and forth between them. I find this method most natural personally and when annoyance is my goal I employ it almost effectively. Genuine but unwanted apologies are a related strategy. 8. Try NOT to annoy, which is very annoying to annoyed people in general. 9. When all else fails, commit the grave sin of using someone's favorite word all wrong (according to them, and done seemingly on purpose), misspelling it if possible. 10. To really annoy FOLKS, do any of these in a song. ~S~ |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 18 Oct 00 - 03:39 AM When making love, be sure and let your partner know your enjoyment, every now and then laugh out loud
Allow your dog to show his love for your friends by letting him roger their knees |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Catrin Date: 18 Oct 00 - 04:21 AM Take a bodrhan to a sing around. Stand just behind someone who is singing an unnacompained song and sing a different version, louder! Start a thread called 'all mudcatters are dimwits, without posting a message'
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Lena Date: 18 Oct 00 - 05:21 AM I know partners who would get up and walk out if you laugh while making love. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jeri Date: 18 Oct 00 - 08:26 AM The #1 thing to do to annoy others is to not get annoyed. People intentionally try to jerk your chain, and others are really into being offended or angry while you sit there smiling obliviously. Drives 'em nuts. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bernard Date: 18 Oct 00 - 08:51 AM Be me. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Giac Date: 18 Oct 00 - 08:55 AM Say once too often, "Let me tell you about this really cool thing that was on Mudcat today ... ." Then tell them, complete with hand gestures, about a post that makes no sense unless one had read the whole thread and several others that lead into it. Guaranteed to elicit a response such as, "Uh, I just remembered, I have to schedule a root canal."
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Marion Date: 18 Oct 00 - 09:41 AM Use expressions like "the O word" or "the J word" without explaining them.
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: wysiwyg Date: 18 Oct 00 - 09:56 AM Marion, maybe I'm just not up to being raked over the coals one more time today for using the J-word. I guess I'd rather annoy, if I am going to anyway, this one time, by using the euphemism instead. Have a good day. ~S~ |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Kim C Date: 18 Oct 00 - 09:58 AM Do like Dieter on the old Sprockets (from Satruday Night Live, the last time it was good) and say in a serious German accent, "your conversation has become tiresome," when a co-worker comes over to your cube and starts talking about stuff that you really don't give a sh*t about. I almost did this the other day. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: LR Mole Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:02 AM Pretend you're Doc Savage and do a lot of eerie trilling that no one can identify the source of. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,Hardy Hahr Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:23 AM ***Use logic in Irish Tribal Trouble threads. ***reply to the initial poster here with humor, or God forbid, mild disagreement. ***Make the claim that Dylan didn't 'steal' tunes, he merely 'borrowed' them. H.H. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: bbelle Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:36 AM Well, GUEST,Hardy Hahr ... since I'm the initial poster and a member and you're the guest with an alias ... enough said. Oh, and if that was a flame, you gotta get more creative. Flames no longer bother me, but to make me LOL, I expect them to be both original AND creative, which may be a stretch for you. BTW ... you don't annoy me, you are an "annoyance," sort of like a fly. moonjen |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:02 PM Ask Art Thieme to define "goddam song". :-) Matt - the "O" word??? Dave - brilliant wedding suggestion...a major coughing fit is pretty cool for that too! Here are some more ways to really annoy people: 1. Drive around town after a wedding in a long line of cars, all honking their bloody horns endlessly. 2. When above group of horn honkers passes, hold up a huge sign advertising the number of a cheap divorce service in case it doesn't work out! 3. Throw a pie in your chief executive's face as he mingles with the public, as was done recently to Canada's PM, Jean Chretien (WHO??? ask all the Americans...). This will actually annoy a few...and delight many, I can assure you. 4. Assert on ANY Mudcat thread that Nazis/Custer/Confederate soldiers/Communists/and/or/any-other-presently-hated-and-conveniently-demonized-group-of-people-from-any-particular-historical-episode...might actually sometimes have been human...despite their obvious errors in judgement or moral conduct. 5. Have the outright temerity and nerve to be yourself at all times, even if people don't get it. 6. Apologize when they would rather you didn't, cos it's more fun for them to stay good and mad at you. 7. Or don't...either way works great. 8. Be Bernard. :-) Oh...and Dylan didn't steal tunes, he simply improved upon them, IMNSHO. :-D - LH
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Wolfgang Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:16 PM The "O" word? Oasis, a group often mentioned approvingly by the poster formerly known as Mbo. Wolfgang |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Micca Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:17 PM State or overtly (or covertly) imply that your belief system/religion/god/godess, is THE only "one true" belief and "the only moral code" that has any validity... and therefore is "superor" to all others. Well, it works for me... |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: SINSULL Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:21 PM Remind everyone across the US and Canada that New York City is having a SUBWAY SERIES! A twice in a lifetime event! And you're all losers!!!! "O" = Oasis "J" = Jesus |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:30 PM OASIS!!!!! So there. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:30 PM you know, Little Hawk,.. "J"...he walked on water, sort of like "D"...;>)) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: mousethief Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:32 PM Start a mudcat thread about how other mudcatters don't use the thread title field properly, or talk about too many non-traditional-musical topics. Make "feminist" jokes. Give your real, honest opinion on something you disagree with the vast majority of mudcatters on, rather than pretend to agree with them. Go into a thread about some topic and argue strenuously about how you have a right to post to that thread your disagreement with and/or disbelief in that topic. Make serious posts in a lighthearted thread. Make lighthearted posts in a serious thread. Like music that is not "traditional" according to the opinion of one anal-retentive mudcatter or another. Go to a baptist (or other teatotalling) church and comment on how your buddy Jim here showed such hospitality having you over for a beer last weekend. Answer everything people say with, "No, not really."
Alex |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:40 PM Yeah! Right on, Bill D! :-) Here's are more ways to really annoy people... 1. Refuse to post to the thread they so hopefully launched. 2. Or do post, and go on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on....without any paragraph breaks...and on, and on... (I, of course, would never have the bad taste and thoughtlessness to do that...I put paragraph breaks in all my stuff now) 3. Use irony. It annoys the literal-minded terribly. Ditto for sarcasm. 4. Be crass and insensitive, with no provocation whatsover. GUEST is great for that. 5. Laugh at a very serious point someone has just made. 6. Say "I have just one thing to say about that..." and then go on for 5 pages about it. 7. Keep putting the acronym IMHO in everything you write, when everyone knows that your damned opinion is anything but humble...that's why I prefer to put IMNSHO. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: SINSULL Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:43 PM Revive the "Killing the Thread" thread. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 18 Oct 00 - 12:47 PM Please, God, not that. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: harpgirl Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:02 PM Play a tune in any time, and, trot your foot randomly in no rhythm at all. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bert Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:08 PM Harpgirl, That's IMPOSSIBLE! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jim Krause Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:39 PM Bert, no it ain't. I've seen it done. Didn't know whether to laugh out loud, or cry. Soddy |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jim Dixon Date: 18 Oct 00 - 01:58 PM 1. Start a thread with a title that makes no sense. 2. Post a long rambling message that never gets to the point, or doesn't have one. 3. Make lots of vague references to other messages in other threads without identifying the threads or explaining what they were about. 4. Make lots of references to personal messages you have sent to other people, or received from them, or intend to send them, or want them to send you. 5. Drop lots of hints that you have a lot of grievances against other Mudcatters but that you're too polite to say who they are or what the grievances are about. 6. Drop lots of hints that a lot of other Mudcatters are close personal friends of yours who would defend you to the death, and since THEY understand you, you can't help it if no one else does. 7. Keep accusing other people of violating various etiquette rules, and keep inventing new rules to stay ahead of them. 8. Turn every difference of opinion into a personal attack, and make sure YOU are seen as the victim of that attack. 9. If anyone criticizes you for any reason, insist that the REAL reason they criticized you is because they're prejudiced against you because you --- (fill in your favorite reason for being a martyr here). 10. Imply that, since you have been a Mudcatter since before dirt was invented, you can't help it if you understand everything better than everyone else does, or ever will. 11. Don't show a sense of humor about any of this. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: SINSULL Date: 18 Oct 00 - 02:00 PM Not for the rhythm impaired, Bert. I had hoped you would be a little more sympathetic. Can't waltz due to the same impairment. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Geoff the Duck Date: 18 Oct 00 - 02:12 PM The late English Punk Philisopher Sid Snot, on the Kenny Everett Show once said "Playing loud music in your garden can annoy your neighbours, - and another good one is to set fire to their cat!" 'nuff said! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 18 Oct 00 - 02:43 PM Tikcle some akk!...one while theme,.re try9ing to pooo9st to Mudcat!!11! Stop that, yoo..I mean it now, stop! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,kendall Date: 18 Oct 00 - 02:48 PM that was me Bert. Believe me, I have a cousin who does it all the time. I cant stand to look at his feet! He has NO sense of rhythm at all. (He has 8 kids to prove it) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: hesperis Date: 18 Oct 00 - 02:51 PM Little Hawk - wrestling with your reflection again, are you? |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jeri Date: 18 Oct 00 - 03:54 PM If you don't like the way a certain group operates, attempt to convince them they're wrong, you're right, and they must all change. Every last one of 'em. This probably won't annoy the group members as much as it will frustrate you for as long as you keep trying. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 18 Oct 00 - 09:36 PM Helen, The Vegemite Incident (as it shall ever be called) seems to be one of the only things that's safe to joke about as of late without somebody getting annoyed. It certainly wasn't intended as an attack, but just in case ti was taken as such, let me put in my nomination that you be the Snog Of The Week recipient next week. And here's a big hug until then (((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUG!!!!!!)))))))))))))))))))))))) Rich |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 18 Oct 00 - 10:46 PM 
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: sophocleese Date: 18 Oct 00 - 10:51 PM How did you do that Bill? That's nifty. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 18 Oct 00 - 10:54 PM blue smoke and mirrors |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: doodlezak Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:00 PM nice, bill d. i admit i went for the russian-english translator.--doodlezak |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:08 PM Okay, there are certain words that really annoy certain people...like "solipsism", for instance. I recommend that we all get together and establish some really SOLID Mudcat rules and get those words either banned outright, or make people print them backwards, so as not to annoy anyone in future. With any luck we could get Congress to pass legislation on this eventually, and clean up language everywhere in the good ol' USA. The word "tit", for instance is very offensive. It offends me every time I see it. I demand that everyone spell it backwards from now on...or stop using it altogether! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: hesperis Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:14 PM LH, there are birds in England called 'tits'. Blue Tit and Lesser Tit, I believe. Our UK people can probably tell us more about that........ "Tit" is not an inherently offensive word. It's just the way it is used by certain narrow-minded individuals that is the problem. Just like any other word. "Fuck" for example. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: catspaw49 Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:18 PM Don't want to interupt here folks.........Just making a few notes for future reference................go right ahead...................... ..........and what the fuck is your fuckin' problem hesp? Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 18 Oct 00 - 11:18 PM Little Hawk...if I wasn't heading for bed, I'd do it upside down just to torment you..*grin* (I really lied before-I have tame aliens who fix it for me!) Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic Arthur C. Clarke |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 19 Oct 00 - 12:51 AM RANT - Take a joke about someone's bodiily functions and run it into the ground, so that eventually every thread has references which make this seem like a site for repressed teens, getting away from mom and dad for the first time and using all of the "no-no" words and tasteless humour they can think of. In other words, lay off of Spaw, already!/RANT BillD, that is one of the best quotes I've ever read, really like that, shoulda been on the Unexplained thread. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: bbelle Date: 19 Oct 00 - 12:59 AM Thank you, kat. jenny |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Sorcha Date: 19 Oct 00 - 01:26 AM You guys is all nutso. I liked the original post,but why does silliness always have to degenerate into nastiness? Silliness is sometimes just silliness, with no (Freudian) overtones........... |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Lonesome EJ Date: 19 Oct 00 - 01:46 AM Paraphrase a previous post with only minor variations,add "I'm surprised no one has said this yet!",then PM several of your pals to post messages praising your intelligence,insight,and creativity. Walk around work with your tie thrown over your shoulder.When someone mentions it,tell them you flew to the office in a biplane. Walk around with your pants unzipped.If someone mentions it,tell them you just got your underwear out of the drier and are cooling them off. When you are in an ethnic restaurant,for example Chinese,order loudly using a Chinese accent.Insist that all of your tablemates also use a chinese accent, to make the experience more "authentic". |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Amergin Date: 19 Oct 00 - 12:34 PM Kat, you mean this is not a site for repressed teens? Damn, I guess, I'll have to find another site then... Amergin |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Grab Date: 19 Oct 00 - 01:20 PM Damn Bill, I was trying to copy that so I could find what font you'd used, and I was well puzzled by why it wouldn't select the characters... :-) 1) Say you work for Microsoft. 2) If someone you know really does work for Microsoft, start with the "Here's a Bill Gates joke I bet you haven't heard." 3) Submit the same post more than once. 4) Submit the same post more than once. 5) Submit the (you get the idea) Grab. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 19 Oct 00 - 01:41 PM Mention Bob Dylan in every thread you can, no matter whether there is any good reason for it or not. Actually, I can always come up with a good reason to mention Bob Dylan, but that's just me, of course... Throw in a quote from a Dylan lyric to further illustrate whatever point you are making. Add an obscure anecdote about Dylan which nobody except a total Bobaholic would know about, or even CARE about. My God, there are a lot of philistines out there... "You've got a lotta nerve, to say you are my friend..." Hesperis - taking me seriously, eh? Cool! If you do happen to use the word "tit" I will assume that you are referring to the bird, not the bodily attachment. Actually, I would have assumed that in any case, but it was good of you to point it out. We can't be too careful in our continuing struggle to provide totally non-annoying and inoffensive material to the masses on Mudcat. Please note that I did spell "tit" backwards in this posting, so that no one need be offended. I vote that we also spell "Spaw" backwards from now on, which is "Waps". Neat, eh? Kat - I'm willing to stop making fart jokes about Spaw if the rest of you are...but is HE willing to? Bill D - Actually, EVERYTHING is indistinguishable from magic. It's all magic. Or it isn't. Whatever turns you on. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 19 Oct 00 - 01:54 PM Grab...the font is called "Dabbington"...it comes that way , but knowing that no one would have it installed, I had to do a couple of 'extra' things...(like sort of bending one of Max's posting rules...don't tell him *wink*) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 19 Oct 00 - 02:22 PM Now, Bill, don't go ignoring my post just because it's too long... |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 19 Oct 00 - 02:34 PM ignore?...what, ME ignore?Nawwwwww...I merely failed to RESPOND... ok, here you go..... it follows that "Bob Dylan is indistinguishable from magic", which means I oughta be able to buy a book showing how they DID him. (now...off to the Getaway tomorrow...not sure if I can continute this witty repartee' until Tuesday or so,,,but maybe NOT doing so will reduce annoyment for some) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: wildlone Date: 19 Oct 00 - 02:45 PM você pode usar um programa da tradução escrever suas mensagens e para fazê-lo parecer você seja clever.But somente àqueles que o dont compreende
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 19 Oct 00 - 03:29 PM It doesn't have to be an all or nothing, LH, just not in every damn mention of him. And, no, Spaw backwards is not neat. Don't be messing with our Spaw, ya hear?!! One more for the general list: make every posting long and write it in know-it-all rhetoric, esp. make it sound as though no one else could possibly know as much or more than you. BillD, whadja do pass the "ole curmudgeon" stick to me? I guess I'll continue on in your absence, unless they throw me out! katlaughinginacurmudgeonlyway |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Tinker Date: 19 Oct 00 - 03:51 PM Just smile and shake your head in amusement at random times... no reason needed... and insist that there's no reason... really.. Tinker |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Irish Rover Date: 19 Oct 00 - 04:22 PM I find being myself, and stating my thoughts and positions is usally enough to piss of the general population. however I'm still here! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 19 Oct 00 - 07:10 PM reminds me of one of the best lines I ever heard...a guy I knew in high school once looked at me and said,"I'm probably the only one at North High that more people don't like than don't know!" he DID have his ways of annoying people....like sitting in algebra class with his book closed, looking bored...and when the teacher would call on him, just look up, give the correct answer, and go back to being seemingly inattentive...I know it drove ME crazy.... |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Troll Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:00 AM Stand at the ATM yelling "I WON! I WON! Third time this week!" troll |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: catspaw49 Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:29 AM Oh gawd troll....That's GREAT!!! If they don't find me weird enough in this town, you can bet this will put them over the edge. Tomorrow for sure!!!! Had a friend who would pull through McDonald's in the old days when you could hear the customer over a speaker inside instead of the headsets they wear now. Jim would wait for the kid to come on and ask for the order and then say, "Hello......HELLO.......HELLO" and of course the kid would keep asking for the order. After about 3 or 4 of these non-exchanges, Jim would add, HELLO......HELLO.....HELLO????????..........Aw shit, these fuckin' things NEVER work!!!"..............and drive off. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Lonesome EJ Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:34 AM "One more for the general list: make every posting long and write it in know-it-all rhetoric, esp. make it sound as though no one else could possibly know as much or more than you"...Katlaughing But oh how easy it is to simply scoff at the so-called know-it-all,who in fact may not actually know it all,but may merely be seeking to explain to himself that which he may indeed not know,but merely suspect. And after all,is not all alleged knowledge suspect? Is not knowledge,when kept hidden from healthy questioning suspicion,nothing more than blind,accepting ignorance? I hope that you might,Katlaughing,be able to grasp the brilliance of this statement,which seems so obvious to Your Humble Servant LEJ PS..That sorta along the lines of what you were talking about Kat?
PSS...Oh,another suggestion for annoying people.Show off your limited knowledge of HTML by scattering little HTML effects throughout your |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: catspaw49 Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:38 AM You're on a roll this week Leej..........Can you send me a new keyboard? I can get the mess off the screen, but the keyboard may be a goner real soon. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:41 AM OH! My LeeJ! Yes, indeed, darlin', THAT is exactly what I was getting at, but then of course you would know that IF you had the same references that I have, being the annotated text of the Sacred Fertility Rites from the Temple of Teksab, which is supported by the subtext of the Yhtapmys, so important to the timeline of what I was referring to in Thread #2397?88794&--707779. Of course, you wouldn't know about the Ancient Mother Mysteries of the Seventh and Thirteenth Houses of the MatreMonious Chapter of the Most Wholly-Owned Subsidiarary of the Humble Order of the Reconstituted Virgins, either, which knowledge I am not at liberty to divulge having taken the Sacred and UnDying Oath of Allegiance to the United Order Vulvania Amazonia, especiallly to those of the Dangly Bits, upon pain of losing my newly acquired virginity, which one works all of their life to regain if one wants to serve in the Higher Realms of Possibilies concerning the Absolutes of the Unexplained, for which I can reveal no explanation, neither for why we want to reconstitute our Hi!Mens nor what the Unexplained really is all about, but I'll give you a hint: it ain't about the Hokey Pokey! kattheerudite
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Bill D Date: 20 Oct 00 - 08:44 AM kat....why, if I didn't understand a bit of that, do I feel all tingly and flushed? (you didn't have some of that there subliminable stuff in there, did you?) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 20 Oct 00 - 10:21 AM My Dear Mr. BillDee, There are those rare times, when one of the Dangly Bits reaches a certain stage of advanced age, when in the consistent company of even one of the UOVA, that they might gain a slight knowledge of the Rites, although, most greivously do I report they are never quite able to reach the Higher Realms as it would take a miracle to reconsititute a rent asunder beFORE epidermal over a Dangly Bit, thus, they remain forever non-virginal, unable to partake in any of those ceremonies of the Inner Circle of Possibilities, Applications, and Decreed Activities. As to your question regarding any mind-altering techniques of the Realms: what is in your mind, is that which was placed there by those of you who know who you are and noone, not even they, nor those, can tell you exactly what it is that you believe has been used upon you, nor placed therein, except of course that part of yourself which is all-knowing, which is a smaller portion of the greater InSight of us all. In the sincerest wish that this has been, in some small measure, worthy of your attention and has shed even a glimmer of Light upon your world, I am maniacal giggle most humbly yours, katonarollwithoutthemayo! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: catspaw49 Date: 20 Oct 00 - 10:45 AM Well, I did it! I waited til there were a few people around who would notice and I acted really happy and hopped out with my money in hand and a big smile. One lady looked completely confused....a truly CLASSIC look!!! Thank you troll.....I feel GREAT!!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: McGrath of Harlow Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:26 PM There's teasing annoying, and there's slipping the knife in deftly, like in this post which hit quite a few targets pretty accurately. Well, that''s a mixed metaphor, of course, and that annoys people quite often.
Of course if you really want to cause an eruption, start a thread like this one....
Or when people get annoyed by something like that, say that you can't understand why they're upset.
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: catspaw49 Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:36 PM I think kat has shown great deftness with the knife you speak of Mac. Of course that's an oobscure reference without naming names and generally annoys folks too. And Bill, at your age, the wee dangly bits....well............uh, well......like,uh.... they are just wee dangly bits... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Lonesome EJ Date: 20 Oct 00 - 12:37 PM LEJ(prostrating self before Katlaughing)- "I am not worthy,Oh Mighty One! Oh Great Fountain of Obscure Allusion,Mistress of the Arcane Reference,have moicy on me!" |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:01 PM E'now, m'Lord! Rise up o' thou Prostrator of the First Order. Ye have shown yourself worthy of the Mighty Honour of the T'irdee-t'ird Degree of Obfuscation of the Most Precious Mud, a subsect of the UOVA, unto which you will comport yourself in a seemly manner of untoward behaviour, delivering the eulogenic accolades of the HORV, while appopriately demonstrating the proper application of digital dexterity and satiation to those Dangly Bits of your own. Oyez, Oyez and so it is! MAR(s) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:07 PM I believe you spoke of your "newly acquired virginity", Kat. Intriguing. I have been running a virginity restoration service here in Orillia for several years now. Its slogan is "Re-experience The Thrill Of The First Time". I do, of course, have a professional interest in exactly what method was used to restore your virginity, as it might involve copyright infringement on the Coventry Method, or then again, it might not. It would probably be good if we could exchange some detailed info on this at some point. Virginity restoration is a tricky business, but entirely worth the trouble to some people, while others simply can't be bothered. We once undertook the virginity restoration of an Ontario politician (whose name I cannot divulge). It was a desperate business. It took 75 days, and 130 gallons of chicken fat, but we finally succeeded. I sometimes wake up in the night, wondering if we made a tragic mistake in his case... The only group we have found that is almost completely impervious to virginity restoration is lawyers. Bankers aren't easy either... At any rate, do PM me on this at your convenience. I never fail to appreciate the erudite nature, the good humour, and the well expressed consistencies that are so liberally sprinkled throughout your postings on this and various other threads of dubious value. :-D |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: John Hardly Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:25 PM Lonesome EJ, You are the annoyance KING!! I mean that in the best way. LOL John |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: WyoWoman Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:33 PM Kat ... I am simply in awe. ww
(I've found, actually, that the virginity restoration thing sort of takes care of itself if one waits long enough ...) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jim Dixon Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:34 PM McGrath: Just curious - In your last message above, why does your first blue clicky point to http://ragtime.mudcat.org/ instead of http://www.mudcat.org/? What IS http://ragtime.mudcat.org/? I've never encountered it before that I'm aware of -- |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jim Dixon Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:41 PM And if anyone admits to being annoyed by anything, accuse them of being narrow-minded and too judgmental. (Boy, I hate judgmental people. They really annoy me!) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: McGrath of Harlow Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:48 PM Aha! The mysteries of the mudcat. There are in fact two identical mudcat sites. I think the official term is "mirror sites" - I think they're in parallel universes that happen to be running in synch for the time being.
Anyway, when for some reason the http://www.mudcat.org/ site is playing up - giving unobtainable, or being remarkably slow, it's worth trying the other one, which is http://ragtime.mudcat.org/
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: mousethief Date: 20 Oct 00 - 01:48 PM "...and intolerant people are guillotined immediately..." --Roy Zimmerman
Alex |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: hesperis Date: 20 Oct 00 - 06:19 PM kat - that was SO good! LH - assuming that the lawyers have, in fact, lost their virginity. If they HADN'T lost their virginity before purchasing your service, they might have a little difficulty in RESTORING what had not actually been lost. (I mean, who would DO IT with a lawyer?!!!) (That was supposed to be a joke, eh?) |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Ebbie Date: 20 Oct 00 - 07:41 PM Rofl, kat, Lej, BillD, spaw, LH... It even shut up my budgies. (Why does that sound obscene??) JimDixon, I have never found a way to say, " Fundamentalists are the most judgmental religious people I have ever known." As soon as I say that, I've done the ultimate, myself. I need help with that... Ebbie |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Jim Dixon Date: 20 Oct 00 - 07:54 PM Ebbie, I don't think you've done the ultimate. There's a difference between saying, "I say you're wrong" and saying, "I say you're wrong and God does too." Between the two, I'd say the second is more judgmental. On the other hand, if you're condemning fundamentalists on the ground that God says they're wrong, then you're pretty much in the same boat with them. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 20 Oct 00 - 11:29 PM I see the "killing the thread" thread is back up. Spaw, you suck! :( Rich |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: catspaw49 Date: 20 Oct 00 - 11:40 PM Now wait a minute here......It was Morticia's idea. Well, not exactly her idea, but it was just one of those things.....and you'll notice that Morty is the last poster at the present time. So let's all blame Morty......(see the thread about BS:Fin I'm proud" or something to that effect) On the other hand, I see we're still wallowing around on that stupid "Goodbye" crap.......gawd save us from a part 3!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: hesperis Date: 21 Oct 00 - 12:36 AM Yes, but JimDixon, Ebbie, God DOES think that fundamentalists are wrong!!! Trust me... |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 21 Oct 00 - 12:46 AM God - the Cosmic gave humankind free will, GtheC is impersonal in that S/He will not override a person's free will. The Universe is accepting of all, as a loving mother/father god of our hearts and makes no judgements; that is left up to the infallibility of we daft humans. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,GOD Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:00 AM Dear, misguided kat: I DO disapprove of fundamentalists' ideas, whatever their religion. Fundamentalism was NOT foreseen when I drafted the concept of 'Free Will'. Although Free Will is a beautiful idea, it hasn't worked out the way I planned it. (Neither has Democracy.) If you need more assurance that this is, in fact, Me, GOD, please read 'Conversations With God' by N. D. Walsh. Of course, fundamentalists are still My Children, and are fully acceptable to me as human beings.
Bless you all, |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,Jesus Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:08 AM Verily I say unto thee, the Father is right, and his counsels are wise. A fundmentalist is like unto a canker on the hind end of an ass. It was ones such as these who condemned me to death, and would do so again in a moment, had they the chance. I say unto them, ye have prophesized in my name and yet ye know me not. Get ye behind me! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,Sat;an Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:12 AM DON'T LISTEN TO THOSE 2 PREVIOUS POSTERS! THEY ARE IMPOSTORS! EVERYTHING THEY SAY IS A VILE, TWISTED LIE!!! FUNDAMENTALISTS RULE!!! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:13 AM Being a little presumptious and judgemental there, Guest. I am not defending fundamentalism of any ilk, so take a chill pill and call us in the morning. kat |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: GUEST,Jesus Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:17 AM O thou devious wretch, thou hast perjured thyself with thine own unruly tongue, for thou canst not even spell thine own name. In any case, dost thou not recall that it is the meek who shall inherit the Earth. Little care I for who "RULES" over the present corrupt systems. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: katlaughing Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:22 AM How To Really Annoy Folks: post as a know-it-all deity, then argue with yourself! |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Lonesome EJ Date: 21 Oct 00 - 01:27 AM I'm just glad my delusions of grandeur are limited to Napoleon.Thanks guest,for raising the normalcy curve. |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: McGrath of Harlow Date: 21 Oct 00 - 06:07 AM Using split infinitives is one way to really annoy some people...
If I say you're wrong, it means that I think you are wrong; in that case, if I believe I am right, and it follows that, if I believe in God, I think that God thinks you are wrong - and of course God has to be right. On the other hand, of course, I could be wrong, in which case God thinks I am wrong...
Am I right or am I right? |
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Subject: RE: Real BS: How To Really Annoy Folks From: Little Hawk Date: 21 Oct 00 - 11:03 AM Sort of like "to boldly fuck up where no Mudcatter has ever fucked up before", right, McGrath? Actually, that's Spaw's job, isn't it? Anyway, If you were as right as you think you are you'd really be right, but you're not as right as you think you are, you're only as right as I think you are, and IMNSHO I don't think you're so right! Do you follow me? Lonesome - You can't be Napoleon. I am Napoleon. How do I know this? God told me. End of story. Ha ha. I really think we should relaunch this thread as Part II. What say? I am going to do so right now. Moonjen can indeed be proud of launching this digital bastard, this tastelessly excessive and painfully drawn out thread, especially since it has drawn input from on high, as it were... Way to go, Jenny! Now here we go... |