BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.

Subject: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 02:56 PM

Well. Not only am I nuts, but, now, I am popular, judging from the PMs in response to my recent nonsense post... or was it nonsense?

Many PM's were positive. Even some of the negative ones were, ah, er, helpful. I agree.... I do need to get out more. I do need to get a life. I should not post when I am half in the bag (or more).

However, the rest of the negative PM's I do not agree with. I am not going to drone on. I have answered each PM personally, except a few, to which I would like to issue a collective answer as follows : lick my nuts. Of course, I told youse guys that already.

Okay... to the point...

Damn straight I was serious when I said $1.00. You like the Café? Send in $1.00. Just one, lousy buck!!! And as far as one of you "negatives" saying, "It would cost more than a dollar to send in a dollar!", do you think before you type? What kind of logic is that ya cheap bastard?

Hell... send in two bits... like I "said"... every bit helps.

gnuts

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 02:59 PM

Well, I always figured you were. Otherwise you wouldn't be here.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: jacqui.c
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:00 PM

Seconded mate.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:04 PM

Hi, gnu. How's it doing? I guess I missed all the above--however, you are still one of the catters I enjoy the most. Is that dollar in Canadian or American?

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:06 PM

What is a PM? I never got one ;)

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:06 PM

Something that women get I think.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:21 PM

PMS is stored in large tanks along the waterfront in Kodiak, Alaska. I have pictures to prove it.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:23 PM

I wondered where it came from.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: CarolC
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 03:25 PM

"What is a PM? I never got one ;)"

Now you have.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 04:59 PM

Is that dollar Canadian or American? Yes Please.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 05:24 PM

Huh? What is this about, gnu? Refer me to the original thread, if you would...

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Ebbie
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 05:30 PM

waht all this abut? (with apologies)

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 06:42 PM

jOhn's had a sex change.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 07:29 PM

Well, if you didn't read it... good... I went a little nuts in defense of Max... got a little stupid cause I had a few ales. And I am kinda embarrased. I was right... but I went, ah, er, overboard.

What matters is this.... those of you who think one dollar... 82.23 cents American for you Canucks, is too little to send in... wrong... send whatever you think a Café seat is worth. Me... I like the views and the company...

For all you what's weenin, like I said... tip the waiter and the service might get better.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: number 6
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 07:40 PM

I believe it is 80.89 cents American (at today's exchange rate) gnu.

sIx

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 07:50 PM

50 cent be good fo me.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 08:05 PM

But, if any Canucks want to send a dollar, send a dollar... don't be worried about the exchange rate. Just send that dollar and let Max worry about what it's worth when it gets there... he's used to being on the short end of the stick.

Imagine... every 'Cat sends a buck, or Canuck buck, or Euro buck, or whatever buck... just one buck... f***.... that's a lot of bucks. At least, it's more bucks than have been getting there lately.

C'mon bucky... time for all good 'Cats to come to the aid of the party.

I AM serious. Hey... it's a BUCK!!!! It IS important. If it wasn't, you wouldn't be reading this, would you?

The buck stops here... with YOU!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: number 6
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 08:10 PM

Where and how do we send our buck. If we all send a buck it will add up to a lot of f***ing bucks!

Hey ... don't we Canucks send a looney, not a buck.

sIx

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: jacqui.c
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 09:04 PM

You can contribute by mailing checks or money orders. You can also use PayPal (send to [e-mail]).

The Mudcat Café
PO Box 3006
West Chester, PA 19381

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 09:07 PM

waht all this is about?

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 09:14 PM

Yes... send a looney... just write "CDN One-------xx" on the money line of your cheque. Or, if you are lazy, you can just write "One" and it will cost you another quarter... or so, depending on the exchange rate.

Regarding : "If we all send a buck it will add up to a lot of f***ing bucks!" ... Yes!!! That's essentially my f***ing point.

Even a dumb ox like me can horn in on that.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 09:17 PM

This is what a f***ing buck looks like regardless of exchange rate.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Azizi
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 09:26 PM

Naughty Naughty.

How do you find these pictures??!!

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Peace
Date: 27 Jul 05 - 09:30 PM

Can't remember. Think I googled

deer mating, photograph

There it was.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: number 6
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 09:48 AM

Peace ... that is how you make a lot of bucks (and buckarroos) regardless of the exchange rate!

sIx

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:13 AM

Peace... your pic lends meaning to the Genus-species name, Cervus canadensis.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: rumanci
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:18 AM

phew !
at least it's not service canadensis
errrrr
never mind

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:30 AM

All life exists to be of service -- if not to itself, to others. Bruce's photo demonstrates this perfectly.

Meanwhile, I'll see Gnu's buck and raise him to $20.00. I mean, c'mon. Most ATM users pull $20's outta their wallets every day!


A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: wysiwyg
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:47 AM

Yes, I am nuts... apparently / I ain't responsable!!!

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 03:38 PM

Knowing there is a problem is the first step toward a solution.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 03:41 PM

Amos me by'. Raise me twenty? Glad to hear it. I'll bet $80 plus. Already sent it lad. Check out the auction. I am sure Max will appreciate your $82.23. And thanks, on behalf of all 'Cats... even the cheap bastards.

Oh, yeah... re one of them PM's... for those who cannot afford a donation, don't fret. Someday, you might help out, no worries in the meantime mates... it's the cheap bastards who can afford a donation but can't find the time that I am after.

Thanks again Amos.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 03:47 PM

Gnu:

Read my ASCII -- I said I'd see your buck (singular) and raise you 20. That's 21.00.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 04:04 PM

Okay... check it out... Amos is good for $21. Good on ya lad. Very generous.

Now... ~S~ appears to be on the verge of breaking down but we're not sure. Hey... if we can get a buck out of a Baptist, we are on our way!! *Just kidding S*

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 08:12 PM

????

WYSIWYG wrote : Yes, I am nuts... apparently / I ain't responsable!!!

And I just saw this on another thread... What's up darlin?

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 08:38 PM

Oh... it's a game. Tee hee. I expect you to send in at least three bucks. One cause you should, and two for penance.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 08:47 PM

Hmmmm? Another shameless call fir dough...

Ahhhh, like what was the original problem that caused this joint to crash every day for a couple of weeks... Hey, if a buck to Max will fix it, fine, but what are we payin' fir??? Like what's broke???

And, yeah, gnu... You are nuts!!!

Doctor Bobert
(Trained Observer of Friggin' Nutballs)

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 09:15 PM

Shameless? Yup... but I have more humilty than you, apparently.

What's broke? Apparently, your head. You just had a thread where Max bashing was encouraged and you never took the time to talk to the man.

What are we payin' fer? Read the threads.

Me, nuts? What's new? Read the threads?

Now... a Friggin Nutball??? Them's fightin words. I don't really expect you to read the threads, might take too long long with your limited intelligence. So let me repeat something that I said previously on one o' them thar threads, lick my nuts.

AND... I mean that, ya fuckin hillbilly. Ya think yer cute? Yer not cute. Ye're a ignorant cheap fuck. A dollar... one dollar. And ye're callin me names? I thought you were a pretty cool guy... now I see different. Kinda makes me sad.

Why don't ya go crawl back under yer own thread? If you can crawl that low.

Jaysus.... NNWW.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 09:33 PM

Now, now, now...

That was purdy danged low there, gnu, you know callin' me all them mean names an' all but...

Hey, when I started my thread it weren't 'sposed to be no Max bashin' thing... I ain't never siad nuthin' but good stuff 'bout Max... I lokes Max jus' fine... I don't played blues wid him and he is a fine feller... I evern said that in my thread...

But some folks come along in a thread where I was jus' askin' like ahhhhh, what's up and jump on Max and now Iz some kinda evil Max-jumper-on'er....

Well, yeah, I am guilty of not readin' every danged post on every danged thread that get's posted on Mudcat and maybe someone has answered the original question as to why the joint was all oof a sudden crashin' dialy. Maybe it never has been answered, I don't know... All I know is that I asked the qiestion and all I got was a lot of *noise* and *testimoninals* but no answers...

This ain't about money 'cause Iz sent monry to Mudcat in the past and if someone had come on here and said that AB & C are the problem and we need money then I'd send money again...

Contrary to yer opinion of me, gnu, I ain't no free-loader...

An' I ain't no ignorant hillbilly either... Hey, I asked a simple question and got back not one answer other than Max is a good guy, which I allready know????

Like where's the ignorance here???

And like, Part B, nevermind....

Peace

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:23 PM

"I don't played blues wid him"? What kind of "reverse" planting is that? He wouldn't play shit with the likes of you.

You don't read the threads but you know that you were not answered? You were answered... take the time to read the threadsssss. Both threads ya bolthole.

Name calling is a problem with you? After you called me a "friggin nutball"? Apparently, you are the friggin nutball, ya fuckin hillbilly SOB bolthole.

Any time ye wants ta go, come ahead, me zon. I trow my coat bot side da road... me, I come to fight, me. That's right. I am a Canuck; I fight in bot official languages.

Well, not really. I don't fight anymore... can't. Too old. Too fat. Too lazy. Too smart. I'll just leave each 'Cat to their own conscience. They can listen to you and not bother to send one measly buck or they can send in a buck and feel good every time they click the Café.

BTW, did I mention?... lick my nuts, ya squirrel eatin hillbilly.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: jacqui.c
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:46 PM

Easy boys - I love you both - don't like to see you arguing. I know you both have good hearts and would do what you can for the 'Cat.

Anyway, you're both mad - that's part of your charm!

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 10:53 PM

Well, gol danged, gnu.... First of all I hope this thread has lots o' folks writtin' one-buck-checks to Mudcat 'cause I ain't gonna go on wid much more fuedin' wid my pal, gnu, but since there ain't been no out-pourin' of one-buck-checks showin up in Max's mailbox, ahhhh, what the heck...

Ahhhh, gnu,

Did you say that I said you was a "nutball"... Geeze, sorry I meant to say that yer mama was a nutball!!!

(Ahhhhh, make them one-buck-checks payable to "Mudcat", please... An' if you wanta sent several of them, ya might wanta send 'u all in one envelope to save postage...")

Okay, like what's ya call a hunnerd gnu's on the moon???

Give up?

A problem..

Hmmmmm?

So what do you call *all* the gnu's on the mooon...

Give up?

The solution!!!!

(Send money...)

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 11:00 PM

On the *mooon*!!! Ya crack me up laddy!!!

BTW... Mum says Hi... and lick gnu's nuts... hey, she wouldn't tell you to fuck off... she's a lady, she is.

Thanks buddy.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 11:19 PM

ROTFL!!

I ain't nerver heerd nor seen no such feud in all my born days, and yer BOTH a pair of bear-greased nutballs with raisins.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Bobert
Date: 28 Jul 05 - 11:45 PM

Sorry, Amos, but me an' gnu think you've been spendin' way too much time with Mr. Mirror....

Send a back to Max...

Fir what? I ain't too sure but send a buck to Max....

B:)

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 29 Jul 05 - 07:29 AM

Discourse of rankling reaction releases endolphins which make you feel good. Typo? What typo... who doesn't enjoy watching dolphins at play and when they perform their antics? And all the vile, vehement, vicious vociferousness heightens these feelings. You thought they were laughing or being friendly? No, no, no. They are saying, "Hey, asshole, if I gotta swim around in this little toilet of a tank and jump through hoops on command, the least you can do is throw me a mackerel, ya prick!"

Now, Amos... of all people!! Calling me a pair (I assume that's a typo) ain't so bad on accounta I kinda look like a pear. Don't bother me cause I gotta pair. But, callin my buddy Bobert a pear don't make no sense. Unless yer bein sarcastrate. He's been losin weight cause he's been workin so hard. I unnerstand he worked so hard that he's got bad knees... had ta go to the doctor an all fer it too. Doc said he was low. Hell, if yer knees were bad and yer back was stooped from all that work, you'd be lower too. Stop picking on him... he is low enough.

BTW, Bear grease? Nope. I would use a non-scented, zinc oxide based, diaper-rash cream on my raisins iffn they was ta get chafed by yer raspy tongue when you...

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: jpk
Date: 29 Jul 05 - 05:42 PM

do you take confederate,i have a few.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 29 Jul 05 - 06:32 PM

Gnu:

You think flipping and flopping like that is gonna get yew offa the hook? You no-good tub of pear-mash, you oughta be distilled and sold as Midnight Moonlight Hogwallop -- one sip will show you da TROOF!

You can backpedal all you like, pal, but you can't stop me from sendin' in my twenty-two bucks to pertect Bobert's good name. You oughta be ashamed of yourself picking on a skinny guy like that!! Whyncha find someone of your own shape to mess wit? I got half a mind to send you to a pear-picking farm. You got no call to mess wit a good guy like Bobert and I yam here to tell ya ya gotta cut it out or your name will be No-Gnus, which would be Good News.

Just cuz you can dish out a bunch of polysyllabic pastoral flights o'fancy doesn't change the fact that you are acting like a pure Gnu-turd. You oughta send Max a C-note just to make up for the embarassment you are causing around here.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 29 Jul 05 - 06:37 PM

I did.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 29 Jul 05 - 06:42 PM

Oh. Well, then...that's better. Bobert, you see what that Gnu did to clean up his act? A C-NOTE!!! Ya gotta admit, that's class. MEbbe you should patch things up with that boy. We need more like him.

Dang, can't even maintain a good scrap around here anymore. Buncha damn pacifists. Dang.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 30 Jul 05 - 10:45 AM

No. That's the point. We need more people to send in a buck. Just a buck. Or two or whatever. It all adds up. Even I can undersatnd that and I don't add up.

Maybe we need a hook, a draw, a celebrity.... Neil, Bill, Shania... ooo, Shania with that video in that see-through... ahem. Minds me of Shane. We could get Shane cheap. A few ales and a hamburger. I'll PM his agent... and book Neil and Bill at the same time. They are charity cases too. Shania... she's tooo country so I don't think the Twain will ever meet. (Yeah, it was a long way to go, but I am perverse... ah, I am perseverent... ah, I am persistent... yeah, got it... I am persistent.)

Remember, no dalmation is too small.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jul 05 - 10:56 AM

Hell and dalmation! Send the Max a buck. It ain't gonna bitecha!

Neil and Bill have agreed to play a charity gig at the Neil Young Center for the Terminally Screwed this fall, just after the Getaway, so ya better send in your advance payments. Make them checks out to Max. It is gonna be mobbed and seats are going fast; don't miss it.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Bobert
Date: 30 Jul 05 - 10:22 PM

Yo, Max... You listenin'??? How many bucks has you got from this thread??? I'd bet, ahhh, not too many....

Okay, hey all you Mudcatters... Yeah, I knowed that I been accused of being a commie agitator and I ain't gonna deny it but, hey, if it's dough that you need then let me tell you a few things about gnu's mom...

She once drank Jack Daniels unner the table, an' she was once known to have only two pairs of footware: two pairs of combat boots, an' she chewed tobacco after hours... So there...

That oughtta get them bucks pourin' in...

An' don't mess wid Texas!!! Spit...

(But, Bobert, you hate Texas, don't ya???)

Ahhh, nevermind the Texas comment... I been in the sun today...

Bo/send$$$$$/bert

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 31 Jul 05 - 07:54 AM

Today, I find I have no foison for a fair fare of flummoxing flubdub for flustering my fine friend's feeble foibles unfairly foisted upon my dear, sweet, Mum.

PS... Mum says fuck off.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jul 05 - 10:47 AM

The gnu sure effs around a lot, doesn't he?

A

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: rumanci
Date: 31 Jul 05 - 10:52 AM

'ooking right Amos
You'd never catch me saying them things
LOL

Send a pound yookers - maybe that will shut him up
:-D

rum

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 31 Jul 05 - 11:52 AM

"Shut him up."? Hey, I am not one to go on and on, just flapping my jaw for no reason. I know when to shut up... not like some people around here. Not me, nosiree indeedy. I was brought up to have more manners than to keep talking and not listen up when others have something to say. More people should learn to curb their verbosity and take the time to genuinely be interested in what others have to say. I learned early in life not to hog the conversation. I nearly starved to death one time... my old man told me to shut up... wouldn't tell him I was hungry!


(Apologies to Foghorn Leghorn.)

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 01 Aug 05 - 11:48 AM

Tens minutes to drop off the page. You thought I might shut up this time, didn't ya? Lest you forget, I am irritant.

Annoyance, aggravation, bother, burr, hassle, headache, pest, plague... elephant.

(Apologies to King Crimson.)

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: GUEST,King Crimson
Date: 01 Aug 05 - 11:57 AM

Hey ye, get the eff out of my court!

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 02 Aug 05 - 07:15 AM

Thanks Bob... didn't know you were a GUEST here at the Café. Don't forget to send in your bucks, bread, bank notes, brass, cash, coin, cabbage, capital, credit, currency, green, gelt, loot, lolly, lettuce, lucre, moolah, mazuma, money, scratch, spondulicks, shekels, wherewithal, wampum.

Why all the BROUUUUUUHAHA and BALLYHOO? Because, wait for it....

Money talks.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: gnu
Date: 02 Aug 05 - 07:16 AM

.... and bullshit walks.

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 12 Mar 06 - 08:28 PM

FOR SALE!

Shaving Cream Pies!

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: number 6
Date: 13 Mar 06 - 04:47 PM

No thanks ... gonna spend some money on Marmite.

sIx

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 13 Mar 06 - 05:43 PM

Well, smearing that on faces looks just as good slapstick I suppose, but it lacks the energy of a good pie fight, which is where this thread looked like it was heading...

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: number 6
Date: 13 Mar 06 - 07:47 PM

yeah in that case I guess I can spare a toonie or two for some pies.

sIx

Subject: RE: BS: Yes, I am nuts... apparently.
From: Bobert
Date: 13 Mar 06 - 08:03 PM

Yuck, this pie tastes like soap!!!