Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)

Subject: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Martin Ryan
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 10:44 AM

The recent (periodic) outbreak of Mudcat angst as to what we should or should not sing reminded me that I heard a parody on "All around my hat" where the chorus went:

I'm going to drown my cat - or I'll smother him with a pillow
....
...
And send all the pieces to the R S P C A!

Such monumental bad taste deserves to be preserved. Anyone have the words , or do I have to chase Roisin White, the fine Ulster singer who perpetrated it on New Year's Eve?

Regards

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Benson
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 10:56 AM

Hey!!!!! I have a cat....I feed it every day...change the litterbox......It's a "Siamese"...(if you please) .....At this moment, it is "sharpening" it's claws on my leg....

I am under the firm conviction that anyone who has had such a creature and not entertained the idea of drowning it......has been..."rowing with one oar"

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Susan of DT
Date: 06 Jan 99 - 08:03 PM

We have it. I searched for "drown cat" with no brackets of quotes. It's called "I'm Going to Drown My Cat"

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Joe Offer
Date: 07 Jan 99 - 01:59 AM

If you do a category search for @cat, you'll find lots of songs to offend the cat lovers of the world. My favorite is Body in the Bag. Jean Redpath has done it on "Prairie Home Companion," but I don't know if she recorded it.
-Joe Offer, dating a woman who has two cats too many-

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Martin Ryan.
Date: 07 Jan 99 - 03:05 AM

Susan

Many thanks!

Regards

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Liam's Brother
Date: 07 Jan 99 - 01:08 PM

Hi Joe!

Re: "Body in the Bag"

I should tell you that Charlie O'Hegarty was one of the house singers at The Eagle Tavern between 1975-1985 (along with David Jones). When Charlie was in top form, he was an absolute scream. We did some touring with Charlie as our opening act and I taped him one night. I will try to locate the tape and copy it for you. You will LOVE it!

All the vest,
Dan Milner

Subject: Lyr Add: Johnny Dolan's Cat^^
From: gargoyle
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 01:05 AM

Its been along time...I will dig out the source and chords and additional lyrics ....along with all of the "Arkansas Slams" and the "Pig stuff" I have promised....however, there is is lively song called "Johnny Dolan's Cat"

Sometimes, I wonder if these threads have access to my persaonal music piles.

You may have seen some wonders
But We'll bet your Sunday hat
You haven't seen as big a one
As Johnny Dolan's cat

We have often tried to drown it
Or to kill it with a knife
But all in vain...for Dolan's cat
Will not depart this life.

And it's still alive and howlin'
Still alive and prowlin'
Still allive and growlin'
Thats' Johnny Dolan's cat

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Joe Offer
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 04:03 AM

Darn it, Gargoyle, you come up with the best obnoxious songs I've seen in years. Any chance you could come up with tunes?
-Joe Offer, collector and singer of the obnoxious-

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Susan of DT
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 06:04 PM

We have even started new categories of @deadcat and @deadbaby. However, the problem with new categories is getting them attached to all the existing songs, so it is incomplete at the moment. Anyone want to work thru some lists of songs in the DT that fit each to help us get this caught up?

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Wally Macnow
Date: 09 Jan 99 - 06:59 PM

"Body in the Bag" is on David Jones' cassette "Songs of Exquisite Taste"

Wally Macnow
Camsco Music
www.camsco.com

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: Liam's Brother
Date: 10 Jan 99 - 09:59 AM

Hi!

And then there is always the "Dead Cat Bounce," a Wall Street expression which means that even a lousy stock will occasionally rise. A dead cat heaved off the top of the Empire State building will bounce when it hits the pavement on 34th Street; this does not mean it's alive.

Just a little Wall Street folklore.

All the best.

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From:
Date: 10 Jan 99 - 09:08 PM

There is reference to the attempted drowning of a feline in "The Cat Came Back". Also Leon Rosslson wrote The Neighbour's Cat, which I have always assumed was from his neighbour's point of view about the Rosselson family cat.

Subject: RE: Cat-Drowning song?
From: gargoyle
Date: 10 Jan 99 - 10:54 PM

Forgotten segment:
At the end of each of these lines there is a horrific "MEOW!!!" a sound like a rampaging ghost cat in heat.

Still alive and howlin' meow!

Still alive and prowin' Meow!

Still alive and growlin' MOEW!

That's Johnny Dolan's cat.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)
From: GUEST
Date: 27 Sep 17 - 02:26 PM

If you'd like to hear the original "I'm Going To Drown My Cat" check out The Somerville Gentlemen's Band on YouTube...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeDmBTpNlpE

The video explains how the song was born back in 1975, within a month of the release of Steeleye Span's "All Around My Hat" in the UK which was a number 5 hit in the pop charts, inexplicably.

Jeremy Patterson wrote this spoof. Watch the video for the full story.

Cheers, y'all

Phil Ferrar from the Somerville Gents

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)
From: MoorleyMan
Date: 28 Sep 17 - 05:33 PM

Thanks Guest Phil for setting the record straight. I've been singing this brilliant ditty (or should that be kitty?!) for a number of years without being aware of its true origin, even though I'd made copious efforts to ascertain the correct attribution. So now I know, I will henceforth credit where credit is (over)due, to avoid any further cat-astrohic mistakes... Cheers!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)
From: GUEST,Martin Ryan
Date: 29 Sep 17 - 09:30 AM

What a tail!

Regards

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 29 Sep 17 - 11:22 AM

Wherever I 'hang' my cat, that's my home!

(apologies to Paul Young)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 29 Sep 17 - 11:25 AM

Sorry. Just read the original lyrics.
Perhaps instead of 'hang' it should be either 'slay' or 'flay'

Cheers

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: I'm Going to Drown My Cat (parody)
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 29 Sep 17 - 11:27 AM

What is the opposite of a chick magnet? A chick turn-off?

If you went to a singaround and sang this, it would be a guaranteed chick turn-off. Just saying.

Subject: Lyr Add: I'M GOING TO DROWN MY CAT (J Patterson)
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 17 Oct 17 - 05:43 PM

My transcription from the video on YouTube. I have boldfaced the words that are different from the version in the DT.

I'M GOING TO DROWN MY CAT
Words, Jeremy Patterson, ©1975; music "All around My Hat" as recorded by Steeleye Span.
As recorded by the Somerville Gentlemen's Band

CHORUS: I'm going to drown my cat,
Then I'll smother it with my pillow.
He's pissed all around my hat,
And he's going to have to pay;
But I'm not into cruelty,
So when I've done dissecting it,
I'm sending off the bits to the RSPCA.

1. Fare thee well, wee mog; you have widdled once too often.
I'm off to buy a dog that is clean and well-behaved.
You've never discriminated about the place where you're urinating,
So "Rest in Pee" will be the epitaph on your grave.

2. Well, to get you potty trained I have struggled till my strength,
Just like your bladder, has been drained all over doors, floors, and chairs.
How your metabolism keeps booming when you produce more than you're consuming
Is really quite beyond me, so kitty, say your prayers.

3. Then I'll take my cricket bat, which is made of finest willow,
And sort you out with that and my troubles at a blow;
But I don't envy St Peter as he waits at the gate to greet ya.
You wait(?) till he's not looking, then you'll widdle through his halo.