BS: research: boys are mean too

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 25 Sep 08 - 01:00 PM

From: Alice
Date: 25 Sep 08 - 08:49 AM

I am my kid's mom, but Dr. Laura is a fanatical kook.

Sure thing, Eistien!

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: PoppaGator
Date: 25 Sep 08 - 10:41 AM

Schoolboys are capable of bullying ~ this is news?

My experience, as a former child and as a father of three, is that boys at their worst can be very mean, and certainly more physically violent than girls, but girl bullies can be hateful on a deeper psychologial level, and won't let up as readily or quickly as their male counterparts.

It's almost a cliche, and a common occurance in fiction and movies, etc. ~ two young men come to blows and then, as soon as one or the other gets a bloody nose or whatever and cries "uncle," the two are suddenly the best of friends, arms over each others shoulders, knocking down a few drinks together, etc.

This is a cliche because it has some basis in reality.

The same kind of thing is much less likely to occur in a conflict between females (of any age).

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Alice
Date: 25 Sep 08 - 08:49 AM

I am my kid's mom, but Dr. Laura is a fanatical kook.

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 25 Sep 08 - 01:13 AM

There is a book out, a must read! The title is a bit deceiving, as the author admits, in the book, but it is a fantastic book, being used more and more in counseling, both in secular and in church counseling. And, if you haven't read it, don't bother commenting on it..."The Care and Proper Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger...and the companion book, "Woman Power" ...Guaranteed to blow you away!

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Sep 08 - 04:11 PM

The whole book, Amos, is hyperbolic. It's meant to stir conversations, I think, but is not presented as factual. I'm only about half way through the book, so I don't know if she will eventually aim closer to the mark.

I got this book at the used-book store where I work part time. In leafing through it I found a section on politicians - especially Cheney - and bought it on that basis. *g*

I too have always liked her.

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Amos
Date: 24 Sep 08 - 03:20 PM

I have always admired Ms Dowd, but I think she may be a bit too categorical. The men I know have certain physical commonalities, of course, but psychologically and emotionally they are as variegated as the women.


A

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Sep 08 - 03:15 PM

In Maureen Dowd's book 'Are Men Necessary?', she says that in the effort of learning to compete in the men's world, women eventually have learned that they get farther by using their innate natures, and it is no longer chic to be 'one of the boys' in the struggle to get ahead. In return, however, she says, men are now using feminine tactics.

On Page 90, she says:

"Politics, after all, is rife with male diva fits, mud wrestling, gossipmongering, feline backbiting, teary confessions amd grooming obsessions. (And this happens all over the world; look at les luttes de chats among Eiuropean leaders over who would have the best plumbers in the European Union and who would have the best restaurants for the 2012 Olympic site.)

"Men are engaging in shrewish, scolding, clawing, vengeful, sneaky, vain behavior that is anything but reasonable and impersonal. Women are affected by lunar tides only once a month; men have raging hormones every day."

lol

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 24 Sep 08 - 04:03 AM

I went to a mixed sex school where there were many many cases of aggressive and violent behaviour. The boys were better at giving me hurtful nick-names but I bore the scar for many months where I was stabbed in the arm with a pen, wielded by girl.

My secondary school was single sex but the violence didn't stop. If anything it got worse, with guerilla tactics and subterfuge to disguise it. Even without the boys to show them how, the girls were more likely to slap than tease. I myself was more likely to lash out with a fist than verbally, but that was the language I learned at home.... I learned to hit back and hit hard. Like all bullies, as soon as I hit back, they stopped picking on me physically.

There is no such thing as 'the weaker sex'... each has its merits and disavantages.

Since leaving school and moving into the workforce, I think I can say that still, boys/men are still better at coming up with hurtful names and mean, spiteful behaviour. History has painted women as hysterical and driven by their emotions, so if it comes down to a 'he said/she said', the man is nearly always given the win.

I think this could easily go under the headline of 'No sh!t, Sherlock!'

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Sep 08 - 09:25 PM

And what's-his-name -- the one who gives nicknames, like "Pooty" Putin.

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Alice
Date: 23 Sep 08 - 09:21 PM

... and Dick Cheney

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: CarolC
Date: 23 Sep 08 - 09:15 PM

...and then there's Karl Rove.

Subject: RE: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Alice
Date: 23 Sep 08 - 09:09 PM

Of course! Don't you remember the sarcastic guy, the ones who called names and started rumors? It's even worse now with cyber bullying.

Subject: BS: research: boys are mean too
From: Desert Dancer
Date: 23 Sep 08 - 07:50 PM

Not surprising, really...

~ Becky in Tucson

Move Over, Mean Girls; Boys Can Be Socially Aggressive, Too
A UA (University of Arizona) study shows that boys still hit and shove, but also use subtler forms of aggression once thought only used by girls.

By Jeff Harrison, University Communications
September 17, 2008

A long-held notion about gender and aggressive behavior in children, it turns out, is not entirely accurate. True, boys are more apt to hit and shove, and girls are more likely to mete out subtler forms of punishment to their peers.

However, researchers have begun to note that boys also use less physical forms of aggression, often called indirect, relational or social aggression, against others.

An analysis by a University of Arizona researcher and his colleagues of 148 studies of aggression in children and adolescents has found that the stereotype of physically aggressive boys masks the fact that boys are just as apt to take part in social aggression as girls.

This research also has implications for schools and parents who may be on the lookout for problem behavior. According to the researchers of this latest study, "we need to also consider social aggression among boys as well as the more direct, physical forms."

The work, published in the September/October 2008 issue of the journal Child Development, was done by Noel A. Card, an assistant professor of family studies and human development in the Norton School of Family and Consumer Sciences at The University of Arizona, and his collaborators at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and the University of Kansas.

Their research analyzed results of studies of more than 73,000 young people, mostly in schools. They examined both direct aggression, usually defined as physical in nature, and indirect aggression, the kind of covert behavior that is designed to damage another's social standing.

The researchers suggest that the myth that girls are more likely to be indirectly or socially aggressive than boys has persisted among teachers, parents and even other researchers because of social expectations that develop early in life. These stereotypes often are perpetuated by recent movies and books, such as "Mean Girls" and "Odd Girl Out," where girls ruthlessly target one another.

Based on their analysis, Card and his colleagues suggest that children who carry out one form of aggression also may be inclined to carry out the other form. They also found ties between both forms of aggression and adjustment problems. Specifically, direct aggression is related to problems like delinquency and ADHD-type symptoms, poor relationships with peers, and low prosocial behavior such as helping and sharing.

In contrast, indirect aggression is related to problems like depression and anxiety, as well as higher prosocial behavior, perhaps because a child must use prosocial skills to encourage peers to exclude or gossip about others.

Card said that the concern is that schools and parents will only look for social aggression in girls and neglect to look for it among boys.

"An interesting aspect of the gender differences is that we found a small tendency, when you ask teachers and parents, they perceive girls as acting more indirectly aggressive than boys. But observational studies found absolutely no differences. It might be the case that the reporters themselves, the teachers and parents, are subject to that same bias of girls being more indirectly aggressive.

Card's study was funded, in part, by the National Institutes of Health.