BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Gurney
Date: 25 Apr 10 - 05:29 PM

Bet they have trouble with buzz, though, Ed.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 25 Apr 10 - 09:29 AM

Yes, hawks can chord:

http://www.hiltonpond.org/images/HawkSharpShinned%20Foot01.jpg

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 25 Apr 10 - 09:23 AM

I am not sure about hawkes,but....

"Large metropolitan cities such as New York value very thin women; in contrast, small, rural towns prefer full-figured, fertile adult women"


"Men, in general, don't judge women as being fat or thin. Rather, men tend to consider women with a 70% waist-to-hip ratio to be beautiful. E.g., a woman with a 21-inch waist and 30-inch hips, a woman with a 24-inch waist and 35-inch hips, and a woman with a 28-inch waist and 40-inch hips are equally attractive.[6] The 70% or higher waist-to-hip ratio, and the Golden ratio (62% waist-height-to-total-height ratio) indicate health and fertility"

"In the animal world, females initiate 80% of matings (see Flirting). Males who initiate mating are the males that no female will approach"

and....

"Fashion models are thinner than porn stars"

http://www.eioba.com/a70149/how_men_select_women

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Apr 10 - 12:15 AM

Native Americans admired all raptors, I think, but they named people after pretty much every kind of animal that was out there...although certain animals were very popular when it came to naming people. Each animal embodied one or more archetypes of human behaviour and ability. The hawk was seen to be a messenger from Spirit to Earth, and was also noted for the ability to see things at a great distance.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Gurney
Date: 24 Apr 10 - 11:31 PM

Leeneia, you lie like a flatfish on a muddy bottom! The seventeenth president was Andrew Johnson.

I looked it up.

'Ducky' Mallard is the pathologist in the TV show 'NCIS.' He drives a Morgan 4/4.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Gurney
Date: 24 Apr 10 - 11:13 PM

I tell you, lads and lasses, I'm frightened for my life,
for by this time tomorrow I'll be buckled to a wife,
An agricultural Irish girl just twice the size of me, and upon my soul, I'm frightened what the consequence will be.
ch.
For she's a fine big woman, she's one you couldn't tame,
and by this time tomorrow, she'll possess my name.
I feel so dreadful nervous, I don't know what to do,
for tomorrow I'll be buckled under twelve stone two!

Bob Davenport is not tall, either.

Native Americans, hunters and observers, would be well aware of the dominating masculinity of the male hawk, I should think.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Apr 10 - 10:15 AM

Strangely enough, Gurney, the "hawk" analogy doesn't work at all in my case. I've always been attracted to really small women, that is...women who are at least as small as I am, hopefully, but preferably a bit smaller. I absolutely do not want to "boss around" a large woman. In fact, I shudder at the notion of being entangled in such a relationship.

Note my attraction to Winona Ryder, for instance...

I had one girlfriend who was so small that one of my cousins uncharitably asked if she was "a dwarf". (He was being a smartass...)

I chose the name because it's a Native American one...and it was a very common name for Native American men as a matter of fact. Crazy Horse had a younger brother named Little Hawk. He was killed in a battle with the Crow as far as I recall...or perhaps the Pawnee.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 24 Apr 10 - 09:12 AM

Dullard Mallard was the 17th president of the United States. There's a theater in San Francisco named for him.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Gurney
Date: 24 Apr 10 - 04:31 AM

I understand that the appellation 'golf' was chosen because all the other four-letter words were taken.

'A marriage of hawks' is a description of a situation where a small husband bosses a large wife. I read that somewhere, by someone famous. Gives rise to speculation why LH chose the pen-name.

So, what do dullard mallard eschew?
Dullard Mallard! What a name for a group!

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 08:48 PM

If they have such little peckers (aka beaks), how do those little hawks eschew anyway?

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 08:41 PM

Could they simply be eschewing obfuscation as their inteerest in golf?

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 08:28 PM

I suspect Quackers eschew golf because the prey is hard, thick skinned, stringy and rubbery. I personally find a 20-bore shotgun best for shooting them, but there's so little to them and what there is tastes so terrible that I no longer hunt them.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Dave MacKenzie
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 08:08 PM

What's my local authority (CWAC) got to do with anything?

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 08:08 PM

My "ka" is what has kept me going...

(ka = the spark (k!) and the breath (aahhh) of life)

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 07:47 PM

Hychydig Chudyll is Little Hawke's ka

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 06:16 PM

I'm told that "Little Hawk" is "Hychydig Chudyll" in Welsh.

Oh, ithyphallic. I thought you said "icthyophallic".

I live with a golf course right beyond my back yard and see men out there from early Spring to late Fall beating their balls with clubs. Women do it, too.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 06:16 PM

I've always taken pride in being on the smaller side. It has allowed me to avoid the notice of rabid fans and stalkers. I simply turn sideways, and they can't see me! ;-) (unless I stick out my tongue...and then they mistake me for a zipper...)

Yes, I am well aware that female hawks are larger and stronger than male hawks. That's okay with me. I've always figured that females ought to rule the world anyway. It would be a far better place if they did, in my opinion. (not perfect, mind you...just better than it is now)

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 06:08 PM

Ithyphallic?...Egad, the Hawke is small? I fear that few mudcatters will wish to associate with him, because the word may be out....that "he is not very large".

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: gnu
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 05:48 PM

Ed T... that is why his handle is Little Hawk... a symbolism of his maleness, his prowess, his mastery of discerning accuracy in insight, his accumen...

Or he's got a little dick. I dunno.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 05:37 PM

Not only can hawks see greater distances than humans, but their visual acuity (the ability to see clearly) is eight times that of humans...an obvious advantage in mainstream Golf (take that Tiger)and in Ontario, Canada inspired "Guano Golf".

In many animal species the males are larger and stronger, but in hawks the difference in size between the sexes is reversed, and females are larger (take that "extremely" Little Hawk :).

Because they are predators, hawks have historically been regarded by many people as vermin (editors note, not sure about "in Mudcat").

In the past, they were seen as wanton killers - cruel and harmful creatures....No wonder they are not considered social golfers by the "Upper Canadian Gentry".

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: mousethief
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 05:15 PM

No hawk has ever been seen to dive upon and sieze a golf ball either, whether or not the ball was in flight or on the ground at the time. This leads to an obvious conclusion.

Hawks have all the balls they need.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 02:56 PM

Don't feel bad, Little Hawk. Ducks may eschew golf, but when the cold weather comes, what do they do? They fly 2000 miles rather than build a simple campfire.

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 02:37 PM

We want Mohawks not less, as Jay Silverheels said. [Allegedly]

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 01:33 PM

No hawk has ever been seen to dive upon and sieze a golf ball either, whether or not the ball was in flight or on the ground at the time. This leads to an obvious conclusion.

The occasional hawk has attacked a golfer, however! Further obvious conclusion. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ed T
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 01:25 PM

I suspect thois is just a bad little hawk guano post?

Subject: RE: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Ebbie
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 12:51 PM

And, of course, I read that as 'Quakers'.

Subject: BS: Perspicacious Quackers eschew golf
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Apr 10 - 12:42 PM

It's true. I've been driving by golf courses for many years and I have never yet seen a single duck waste his or her valuable time trying to strike a very small hard white ball with a long-handled mallet and get it to go into a very small hole in the ground that is a very long distance away.

I think they may be quite a bit smarter than many human beings. ;-)