BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 03:13 AM

Thirsty days hath September,
April June and November;
All the rest are thirsty too,
Excepting February when you get wet through
... So said my grandad, anyway.

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 12:34 AM

to stew or not to

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 01:21 PM

"Thirty days has September.
All the rest I can't remember."

The Kipper Family.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 11:53 AM

I'd sooner watch a woman on a bicycle than a fish. That's not an adage, just a statement.

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 08:33 PM

A bicycle needs a woman like a man needs a fish.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 05:47 PM

Rolling Stones should have retired years ago.

He who hesitates doesn't always know the way.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: DMcG
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 05:33 AM

Home working hot,
Hot desking cold,
Management buzzword soon forgot
It's nine days old

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 05:22 AM

I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy

It is better to question, and appear foolish for a minute, than to remain in ignorance!
Or! It is better to keep silent, and be thought a fool; than to speak up, and remove all doubt!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Metchosin
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 04:07 AM

A day without sunshine is like night.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: DMcG
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 03:27 AM

There's many a click
Twixt nerd and hip

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 07:30 PM

Folk music critics draw conclusions on Bob Dylan the way an urchin scribbles on a stone wall.

The early worm doesn't get eaten! Worms are nocturnal. He goes to bed before the early bird has even gotten up. It's the late worm who gets eaten by the early bird. Same lesson applies in both cases, bird and worm, early is best. :-)

"My country right...or farther right!!! (The territorial cry of the pie-eyed American patriot bird.)

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: catspaw49
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:50 PM

Fish and visitors stink after three days whereas carp and your Great Aunt Clara's farts are real nasty right from the gitgo.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Helen
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:17 PM

This one is from an autosignature on an e-mail. Don't know who actually owns copyright on it:

Objects in your reality construct may be more asinine than they appear.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Helen
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:14 PM

I'd rather have bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

Percussive maintenance (fixing things with a hammer, especially electronic things)

Helen

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: gnu
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:14 PM

Pass that over here....

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: catspaw49
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 05:57 PM

A rolling duck gathers no stitches in time while a chicken who hesitates is early to bed.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: The Walrus
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 05:48 PM

Spaw,

It took me a moment to catch on to that one....OUCH!

W

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: catspaw49
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 05:26 PM

And the brush stays a lot cleaner too Ebbie........

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 04:56 PM

A small horse is quickly curried! but shrimp is faster.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 04:52 PM

Three good 'uns for folkies:

Nothing succeeds like excess.

If a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing badly.

The fool who persists in his folly will become wise

(1.Possibly Oscar Wilde; 2. G.K.Chesterton; 3. William Blake)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 10:06 AM

Never put of 'til tomorrow what you can do today, if you enjoy it today, you can do it again tomorrow!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: DMcG
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 09:56 AM

From "Silvie and Bruno" by Lewis Carroll, (or at least whats left of it after a few decades in my memory)

Teacher: "For careless waste makes woeful want
And you may live to say
How now I wish I had that pin
That then I threw away" - and whats the moral of that story?

Bruno: Always watch where you throw things

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Amos
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 09:50 AM

Never put off until tomorrow what you should have done the day before yesterday.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: The Walrus
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 04:31 AM

When makes something idiot-proof, Nature evolves a better idiot.

W

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: DaveJ
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 03:44 AM

"Progress might have been alright once,
but it has gone on too long."

Ogden Nash

And here is one from when I was in the service.

"The Marine Corps has been around for more than two hundred years unhamperred by progress."

DaveJ

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: DaveJ
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 03:26 AM

"Never be afraid to try something new.
Remember, amateurs built the Ark;
professionals built the Titanic."

Somebody sent the above to me in an email. Sorry, I don't know the original author.

DaveJ

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 01:33 AM

Possum and Taters
Ingredients:

1 young, fat possum

8 sweet potatoes

2 tablespoons butter

1 tablespoon sugar
salt

Directions: First, catch a possum. This in itself is excellent entertainment on a moonlight night. Skin the possum and remove the head and feet. Be sure to wash it thoroughly. Freeze overnight either outside or in a refrigerator.

When ready to cook, peel the potatoes and boil them tender in lightly salted water along with the butter and sugar. At the same time, stew the possum tender in a tightly covered pan with a little water. Arrange the taters around the possum, strip with bacon, sprinkle with thyme or marjoram, or pepper, and brown in the oven. Baste often with the drippings.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: DMcG
Date: 15 Mar 02 - 10:47 AM

General question. How long (if ever!) did it take you to realise 'burning a candle at both ends' refers to lighting a candle in the morning and in the evening, rather than doing something weird with one candle? I knew the meaning, of course, but I didn't actually work out where it came from for a very embarrassing number of years.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Sorcha
Date: 15 Mar 02 - 10:35 AM

A small hole will empty a very large bucket.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Micca
Date: 15 Mar 02 - 10:31 AM

Some march to the beat of a different drum, some Polka!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 15 Mar 02 - 10:08 AM

I march to the beat of a different kettle of fish!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 15 Mar 02 - 04:01 AM

One that confused my daughter (a keen horse rider)
"A small horse is quickly curried!"

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Jon Bartlett
Date: 15 Mar 02 - 01:58 AM

my favourite:

It's a short leg that doesn't reach the ground.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Micca
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 09:41 AM

Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards for it makes them soggy and heard to light

Do not throw cigarette butts in the urinal, for they are subtle and quick to anger

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Trevor
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 09:29 AM

If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer.

(Yep, I'm from near Birmingham!)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: gnu
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 05:50 AM

I was re-reading a favourite author last evening, Ray Guy, a Newf of renown. Now, these may not be twists on oldies, but a couple describing elation stuck in my head....

Like the torn tit that just found a two foot maggott.

Happy and contented as the Parson who got the gear replacement loan to string marker buoys on the Ten Commandments.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 04:43 AM

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then give up, it's no use making a fool of yourself

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Trevor
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 04:06 AM

Never criticise a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes. 'Cos then you'll be a mile away. And you'll have his shoes.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 03:34 AM

Oops! That should have been "R=1/2 mv²"

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 03:30 AM

I don't know who my Member is now I've moved south!

It's better to have loved and lost a short girl than never to have loved a tall.

Dharmabum, right of way is observed as mass x velocity for those who get out of your way, but those who aren't quick enough observe that R=1/2 mv2.

Steve (reatively speaking)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: katlaughing
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 11:49 PM

A bird(UK) in the hand is better than your own member!**BG**

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 11:22 PM

and the Early Christian Gets the Lion..

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Jeri
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:39 PM

Whale oil beef hooked.
(Just thought I'd say it before Kendall says it for the 78th time.)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: khandu
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:34 PM

Kendall,

(Dare I ask?) What is W.O.B.H.?

khandu

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Bill D
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:33 PM

"Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches are insoluble in gasoline"

...from the wall of the men's room at the Methodist Student Union at the Univ. of Kansas- 1969

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Metchosin
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:25 PM

It is better to have been loved and lost than never to have been lost at all.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: CarolC
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:04 PM

Pie cheese and crust all maggoty, cod ham sum of ill bridge!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: kendall
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:23 PM

W.O.B.H.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: khandu
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:02 PM

If at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking til you do.

(i refuse to sign this!)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Kenny B (inactive)
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 02:34 PM

If at firts you dnot suckseed..... - use a spellchecker
Nothing succeeds like a budgerigar

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 02:07 PM

But OFTEN ignored!

(and only useful if the writer of TFM can communicate - which occurs even less often then the occurences of people RTFM!)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Micca
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 01:59 PM

OH sorry, that one actually IS useful!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Micca
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 01:58 PM

When all else fails ...

RTFM

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Steve-o
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 01:23 PM

The whole world is a tuxedo, and I'm just a pair of brown shoes. -George Gobel

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Bill D
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 01:19 PM

the squeaky wheel often gets 'replaced'

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 01:17 PM

It's the squeeky wheel that gets greased

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: kendall
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 01:15 PM

A bird in the hand is worth a kick in the bush.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:44 PM

Idiot-proof is an oxymoron.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Jeri
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:33 PM

It's an ill wind that gathers no moss.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Bill D
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:33 PM

"Some would sooner die than think. In fact, they often do." -- B. Russell

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: GUEST,Nancy King at work
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:30 PM

Nothing is foolproof for a sufficiently talented fool.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: GUEST,pete
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:26 PM

Anyone watching British TV lately? Too many cooks!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: GUEST,pete
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:25 PM

Anyone watching British TV lately? Too many cooks Thats it!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Kim C
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:24 PM

I think that's too much sauce spoils the cook.......

Like Mister always says, a fast hog's a happy hog.

Dave Barry once said something to the effect of "strike the bull or get off the pot." :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Dharmabum
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:22 PM

Right of way is considered a function of mass times velocity.

In the final analysis,the size of one's funeral is always determined by the weather.

Never blame a man for being human unless he makes a habit of it.

Gamble Rogers

DB.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Trevor
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:13 PM

Change is inevitable, except out of the vending machine in our canteen.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: JenEllen
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:09 PM

It is better to share a bed with a drunken cannibal than a sober Christian
H. Melville

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Bill D
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:05 PM

"It's six dozen of the other."

Virgil Plute

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: JenEllen
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 12:02 PM

It is better to live an hour as a tiger than a lifetime as a worm.

Sure, but who ever heard of a worm-skin rug?

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: MMario
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 11:42 AM

Too many cooks makes a crowded kitchen.

The early bird is too sleepy to see the worm.

Let sleeping dogs (and Mad Englishman)lie.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:09 AM

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: catspaw49
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:56 AM

Better to be pissed off than pissed on. And better to be pissed on than pissed through because that would make you a prick.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: CarolC
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:42 AM

If you can't take a joke, take a bus.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: catspaw49
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:40 AM

Too many cooks never make a decent meal.

Early to bed and early to rise...Dull, isn't it?

Do more than is expected of you and soon, more will be expected of you.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Watson
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:18 AM

The early bird may get the worm, but think what the early worm gets...

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: CarolC
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:13 AM

Oh yeah,

Better late than sorry!

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: CarolC
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:12 AM

Now this is a thread I can really get behind. Great idea, khandu!

"The early bird gets worms"

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Hollowfox
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:04 AM

Early to bed and early to rise
Never goes out with the regular guys. George Ade

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Midchuck
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 08:49 AM

Early to rise and early to bed
Makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead.

(James Thurber, IIRC)

Peter.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: gnu
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 08:44 AM

Too much broth spoils the cook.

Early to bed and early to rise makes a man wonder who won the game.

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 08:38 AM

Cliches never agree, it's either
"Too many cooks spoil the broth" or "Many hands make light work"
Similarly, "Look before you leap" but "He who hesitates is lost"

Subject: RE: BS: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: kendall
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 08:30 AM

If you can't stand the heat, it spoils the broth.

Subject: Useless Adage for Today 3-12-02
From: khandu
Date: 12 Mar 02 - 08:33 PM

"Too many cooks, stay out of the kitchen!"