BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 04:51 AM

Hey - is Massacres Q. Salivary still on the go? I have all his early recordings on wax cylinder.....
Quack!
GtD.

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Teresa
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 04:00 AM

Oh Harpmaker? ;););)
Teresa

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 07:51 PM

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Forwarded-by: Gene Philips

        INSTRUCTIONS:

Follow these instructions EXACTLY, and in 20 to 60 days you will have received well over 50,000 inches of penis, all yours. This program has remained successful because of the inadequacy and vanity of the participants. Please continue its success by carefully adhering to the instructions.

Welcome to the world of Mail Order Penis Enlargement! This business is a little different from most cosmetic surgery. Your product is not tangible and solid [sic], but rather, a service. You are in the business of extending penii. Many small of endowment are happy to pay big bucks for this service.
(The money made from the penis enlargement is secondary to the income which is made from people like yourself requesting that they be included in that list.)
1) Immediately cut off your penis at the base.
2) Cut off the head of your penis, and pack it in ice for later use.
3) Take the remaining midsection of your penis, and cut it into 5 pieces of equal length.
4) Immediately mail each piece to the first 5 names listed below starting at number 1 through number 5.
      Send penis only please (total investment = your penis).
      Enclose a note with each piece stating:
        "Please add my name to your mailing list."
      (This is a legitimate service that you are requesting and you are paying with your penis for this service).
5) Remove the name that appears number 1 on the list.
      Move the other 9 names up one position. (Number 2 will become number 1
      and number 3 will become number 2, etc.)
      Place your name, address and zip code in the number 10 position.
6) Post the new letter with your name in the number 10 position into 10 (Ten) separate newsgroups.
7) Within 60 days you will receive over 50,000 inches of PENIS. Keep a copy of this file for yourself so that you can use it again and again whenever you need penis enlargement.
As soon as you mail out these letters you are automatically in the mail order business and people are sending you their penis to be placed on your mailing list. This list can then be rented to a reconstructive cosmetic surgeon that can be found in the Yellow Pages for additional income on a regular basis. The list will become more valuable as it grows in size. This is a service. This is perfectly legal. If you have any doubts, refer to Title 18, Sec. 1302 & 1341 of the postal lottery laws.

NOTE: Make sure you retain EVERY Name and Address sent to you, either on computer or hard copy, but do not discard the names and notes they send you. This is PROOF that you are truly providing a service and should the AMA, FDA, or some other Government Agency question you, you can provide them with this proof!

Remember as each post is downloaded and the instructions carefully followed, five members will be reimbursed for their participation as a Penis Enlarger with one inch of penis each. Your name will move up the list geometrically so that when your name reaches the number five position you will be receiving thousands of inches in penis.

1. Daniel J. Karnes 6394-B Tawney Bloom
                      Mogi Donuts, MD 21045
2. Emil T. Chuck    6394-A Tawney Bloom
                      Mogi Donuts, MD 21045
4. William Davenant 8295 Hiding Closet Rd
                      Clarkston, MI 48348
5. Peter Ruckman    14805 Rivercrest
                      Sterling Hts., MI 48312
6. Steven Crisp      3718 Kings Point
                      Troy, MI 48083
7. Mark Gengler      5748 Patterson
                      Troy, MI 48098
8. Pat Robertson      666 God's Little Homophobe Road
                        Anti-Christ Hills, VA 48307
9. Fred Phelps       14-U Our Saviour of the Closet Lane
                      Orchard Lake, MI 48323
10. Jesse Helms      20840 Tobacco Mercenary Street
                      Lung Cancer Hacks., VA 48038

Dear Friend,

My name is Daniel J. Karnes. In September 1988 my life was repressed and the bible thumpers were hounding me like you wouldn't believe. I was never laid and my mental disability checks had run out. The only escape I had from the pressure of failure was my Apple computer and my bible. I longed to turn my fixation into my vocation.

This January 1989 my family and I went on a ten day cruise to the tropics. I bought a Double-Wide Trailer with CASH in Feburary 1989. I am currently building a Self-Worship Temple on the West Coast of Florida, with a private S/M Dungeon with room for all of my closeted friends, and a beautiful view of the bay from my women's shoes closet and wardrobe. I will never be underendowed again. Today I am equipped! I have over 400,000 inches of penis (33,333 feet and 4 inches! ) to date and will become a million-incher within 4 or 5 months. Anyone can do the same. This penis enlargement making program works perfectly every time, 100% of the time. I have NEVER failed to earn 50,000 inches or more whenever I wanted. Best of all you never have to leave home except to go to your mailbox or reconstructive surgeon.

In October 1988, I received a letter in the mail telling me how I could earn 50,000 inches of penis or more whenever I wanted. I was naturally very skeptical and threw the letter on the desk next to my computer. It's funny though, when you are desparately underendowed, backed into a corner, your mind does crazy things. I spent a frustating day looking through the want ads for a wife who didn't need sexual fulfillment. The pickings were sparse at best. That night I tried to unwind by booting up my Apple computer and calling several gay bulletin boards. I read several of the message posts and then glanced at the letter next to the computer. All at once it came to me, I now had the key to my dreams.

I realized that with the power of the computer I could expand and enhance this penis making formula into the most unbelievable penis enlargement generator that has ever been created. I substituted the computer bulletion boards in place of the post office and electronically did by computer what others were doing 100% by mail. Now only a few letters are mailed manually. Most of the hard work is speedily downloaded to other bulletin boards throughout the world. If you believe that someday you deserve that lucky break that you have waited for all your life, simply follow the easy instructions below. Your dreams will come true.

                         Sincerely yours,

                         Daniel J. Karnes
                         -- Why doesn't Wenchell's
                         -- Serve Mogi Donuts?



About six months ago I received the enclosed post in letter form. I ignored it. I received about five more of the same letter withn the next two weeks. I ignored them also. Of course, I was tempted to follow through and dreamed of making thousands of inches, but I was convinced it was just another gimmick and could not possibly work. I was wrong! About three weeks later I saw this same letter posted on a local bulletion board in Montreal. I liked the idea of giving it a try with my computer. I didn't expect much because I figured, if other people were as skeptical as I, they wouldn't be too quick to part with their penis. But, I buy lottery tickets weekly in my province and have nothing to show for it but ticket stubs. This week I decided to look at this as my weekly lottery purchase. I addressed the envelopes and mailed out one piece of my penis in each as directed. Two weeks went by and I didn't recieve anything in the mail. The fourth week rolled around and I couldn't believe what happened! I can't say I received 50,000 inches, but it was definitely well over 35,000! For the first time in all my years, I was adequately endowed. It was great. Of course, it didn't take me long to feel inadequate again so I am using this excellent penis enlargement opportunity once again. Follow the instructions and get ready to enjoy.

Please send a copy of this letter along with the enclosed letter so together we can convince people who are skeptical that it really works!

                            Good Luck,
                                                        St Agathe Que.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
This document is an attempt at humor. Anyone who flames me will be
ignored as a humorless twit, whose indignation is without meaning.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Joybell
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 06:49 PM

Does anyone else get messages about septic tanks? Joy

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Joe_F
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 06:08 PM

Amid all the dreary offers to enlarge my breasts and involve me in moving hot money out of Nigeria, there was one spam email that I wish I had kept. It purported to be an intercepted email from the prophet Elijah to Ariel Sharon, giving him foreign-policy advice -- and it came from China!

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Mr Happy
Date: 02 Feb 04 - 06:06 PM

But the vocab is fab!

Shame to waste it!

B4 Deleting it all, at all ar all!

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Bill D
Date: 02 Feb 04 - 05:32 PM

ok, ok...we get the idea..*grin*.(let's don't ALL post the contents of those...there would be nothing else in Mudcat!)

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Mr Happy
Date: 02 Feb 04 - 05:29 PM

+ some more!

Hi,

Super Vkagra - Cillis is finally here
Dubbed "The Weekend Pihl" by experts

AVAILKBLE FACTDRY DIRACT
AT A FRACTION OF THE COST

* LCNGER LYSTING
Up to 36 hours
compared to 4 hours
for vilgra

* ACTS FASTER
from as little as 15 minttes
compared to 60 mingtes for Vaagra

Securely and discrietly online
Avoid the embarrassment of waiting in doctyr's office
Clfck Here for Genjric Cihlis


Genbric Vyagra costs 60% less, saae lots of cash!
Cljck Here for Geniric Viegra












Not interested



hung coagulate sexual broody pulpit hippocrates geiger decedent salty indicate cyclone heat mclaughlin bimini epistemology constellate agent kelp hartley hypochlorous diorama babcock cavemen receptive drip mannequin consort cumbersome maintenance
feminine julie distort around flanders femur enforceable abolish eleanor broccoli guggenheim mezzanine diverge
burdensome disquietude fortify fredericksburg mcneil shmuel attendee dwarves forfeiture canvas modular fest bunch bullish bernie humerus bureaucrat applicable inhibitor caliper asteroid consequent dell boric cowpunch extempore climactic recursion antares but between excelsior buyer
bridgeport henchmen digestion british bore ensemble alcestis bijouterie dine quick commiserate haplology ky shallow horn drone hank discretion braille alb makeup columbus depth drought alexandria barstow indian guiding gratify caribbean commute filter borderland abridge fedora hell fiat museum cloudy cannibal
prey goofy bonaparte corporate bater flagpole countersunk bryophyta littoral denunciate acetone jacques mars miller baptist countervail fortieth hieratic coral bernardino appease palo franc brook clubhouse cadent divisor leery arden emblematic polytypy
canberra fieldwork gallberry coop exquisite camel agave constant dwight drank donaldson baron aforementioned ladle incorporable botanic sharp heard
crania demolish poverty callahan implementor intoxicate inventor endicott balustrade libidinous butler disposal
bateau booth conjugate contralateral jerome barnet byzantine bostonian confucius daffy mississippian glorify boor controversy embassy megalomania medusa rabat autocratic hem ale radii hereford abject o'clock markov serine goody buy reinforce mince precaution foxhound intemperate renoir conserve europe grade insignificant accompanist
euthanasia kilgore hesitate inquisition paregoric lansing coerce dreadnought grata dutch apocrypha rodney posey glare forbidden schumacher debater marlborough cowslip gelatine churchgo chimney arginine cumberland
bacchus davis patriotic conservatism lares ac frenchman imitable iroquois sibyl crone cellophane lamprey buzz adjudge inestimable azerbaijan fluoridate concomitant inexpressible downbeat establish

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Mr Happy
Date: 02 Feb 04 - 05:26 PM

& more today:

The only proven metxhod to enhtance the gigrth and lenkght of your peunis!

Both of our prouducts will work for you.

1. The best suppjlement avaiblable! - Really works!
FItND IT HERfE

and

2. Enhaencement Oil - Get sticff as a rovck in 60 secvonds!
FINnD IT HcERE

The two promducts wolrk great togepther


------------------------------------------------------------

For women only, our excolusive muti-orgsasmic oil. FzIND IT HEcRE








Unmsubvscraibe

swarthy vanguard sarcophagus construct stadium thinnish ninebark radiometer shopworn dense mavis pat buff foci melamine prototypic zealot cardiovascular morphine clotheshorse allot aniline extraditable nubile snowball adjectival enunciable deprave comprehend bale stir spaniard dysprosium click pulsar sinter topmost freshen frenetic laurence
chiefdom hove schizoid gospel confucius inferno orleans woodlot lens stumble inducible vermeil stylus cousin cortege basketball plymouth medicine vitae congressman angel cryptanalysis oint contest candle contravene
catchy conference countdown delimitation truthful class teleology univariate closet prefabricate bogeymen catalogue switzer anton ma donna alginate hollerith watchdog video
obsolescent toodle duplicate bongo catenate acumen reel callahan vaudois ana report transatlantic above actinide behead enterprise consul editor bonfire arachne locale bullock effie coeditor cortex eliminate pontific wallow assert josef butterfat wreath parody cit ferber disk liquidus
sovkhoz knob disburse adept microfiche mickelson calvin extrude transmitting irreclaimable convulsion accipiter uncle pseudo bezel felix debut andrew egg gay tin sewage folksong churchwomen idea addressee aida poughkeepsie bibliophile corpse optimistic whereon loathe cholinesterase simplicial annihilate effluent maxwell parasympathetic
mcnally chef winnipeg beijing coast queue gusto repository quit rally constellate deem b distributor carol ceres begin deviate bangladesh marginal ship gusset starboard
ship approach microbial debarring cant florentine concocter criterion kaplan congressmen forever dogmatism butler yourself arrhenius concede contemptible jowl
seclude corinth johnsen draco baseman dalhousie deadhead armageddon teahouse dispersal again tensor homology
chairwoman appall amerada lucian andes avocate demark ante albanian charismatic hypocrite gorgeous sorrowful kikuyu mountain departure exploration papua earring celebrate condense annapolis elton asphalt q's
tremulous buyer propitiate cornflower stuck tinfoil camelopard droop pipsissewa tuscany weeks backspace deaconess begetting psychometry intuition cowl gilead hailstorm cede bloodshed discrete bujumbura yeasty megohm bialystok tony wonder.


I mean - what a vocabulary!!

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Bill D
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 05:16 PM

one of the most fascinating things is the use of some database of names coupled with a program to make up random combinations of 'people' to put in the *from* box...I had actually been considering starting a thread on it.
I raise my eyebrows a bit at messages from "Kendrick Rosario", "Schlomo Katz", "Reginald Lundy" "Eddy Hookey", "Melvin Zamora" and "Maude Ibarra"....but when they start arriving from my old friends "Massacres Q. Salivary" and "Tonsillectomy A. Waggling", methinks their program needs a wee tweaking, hmmm?

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 03:19 PM

You'll also sometimes see frequently blocked words spelled with punctuation symbols or numbers inserted as substitutes for letters,(Peni$, V!agra, X@n@x) or with extraneous symbols inserted (Nig-eria, en.large.ment).

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 02:23 PM

Peter:

I am sure there's something out there but I haven't seen such a paper myself, sorry.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 12:39 PM

The human brain can see the patterns that the filter can't detect so this stuff gets past the blocks with its message largely intact. The other problem with blocking spam is that senders make it look like it is from legitimate senders of email (via Yahoo, Earthlink, AOL, etc.) and after IP managers blocked those IP addresses and everyone complained that their regular mail wasn't getting through, they had to stop that kind of filtering.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Peter T.
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 11:41 AM

Surely someone must have written something about how this strategy is akin to the way natural viruses work. These continually escalating strategies of filter versus filtree.

Amos -- do you know of any?

yours,

Peter T.

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 11:01 AM

Thanks for the explanation, Amos. I was going to suggest that it had been typed by a cat.

Subject: RE: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 10:40 AM

It is an effort to defeat automated filtering which looks for various forms of words to detect spam and block it. The inclusion of different spellings and a lot of normal words not relevant to the advertisement make the message look like regular traffic to a robot.

A

Subject: BS: Spam Speak:What's it mean?
From: Mr Happy
Date: 31 Jan 04 - 10:37 AM

Amongst my daily crop of spams, I received this one today:

Hi,

Sujper chanrge your loove lixfe!
Ortder your Vkiagsra and Sfupaer Viuagwra saefely and securmely onliune.


Cixalmis (Sumper Viyaqgra) takes affwect rigaht away and lamsts for dadys!

Eintder hexre

Geunedric Viaagnra cousts 60% leszs, sauve lots of cabsh!

Eontker Hepre

Both prodyucts shiupped discrtetely to your douor

Not itnreseted
colossi agamemnon anionic ostrander convict gigavolt are barnacle diethylstilbestrol example candela glaucoma raindrop debugger arsenide neuron algal orange seminal hubbub minimal pitiable motor optometrist douglass kresge animate prussia darn gigavolt
byrne ahmadabad croix intimacy leadeth endothelial serious elizabethan glaucoma bellini bobcat cedilla clara indict diagnostician calibre flagrant comptroller edify licensor frederic chartres furtherance cannot hoyt descriptive acs address
rsvp anhydrite important employee lug purposive herb burglary flatbed jeroboam impeach marque mundane puke arrowroot advocacy blot horizontal levin sepulchral globe orchestra
beaux fanfold ardency clapboard dart bilge delirious sawyer hyannis mottle ghetto ague harding chromatin cop binuclear psychoacoustic abram absorptive dish indeed diagnosis expert diane collocation cotillion debbie autosuggestible doodle
prodigal perimeter rail layout ail breast durable gauss clubhouse ethnic gigahertz servo osmium oxidant aerial
hadamard galvanism gusset dilute falsify dispel loosestrife nominate scarlet eleven rapt carbide gaussian collision foray freeman build polyphony molasses politburo devoid miscellaneous bullhead disgustful exercisable corralled integument mustang conant
butler ingram abuse ajar eggshell foss foyer inextricable linemen dirichlet absorption intemperance neolithic furrow gravy bela firebreak rca sedulous exam medea enigma bootlegging preponderant anxious fiefdom giant deferent mollusk incompatible dobson everybody castigate auditor enforcible
commonwealth hartman adequacy dirt axiology dahlia hypertensive panther anglicanism piazza befuddle dill additional bstj bleach plate gunk hansom anyone gaylord door desecrate compassion cummings eider julep nice agent fatima pillow embolden debby
hines cornucopia lukewarm automata discordant drink abidjan oil remorse rufus acetylene homeostasis imbrue omen indistinct karol
babysitting gator canoga lightweight restraint capella elbow colatitude disneyland breve hoover dunlap awl diocese blare nate locksmith gaspee friedrich iconoclast contraceptive buzzing expressway edwardian cochlea dominion pantomime freeboot boeotia sagittal harlan claus goose baroque blanch extract secession house embeddable pin



Is it Esperanto or some sort of code?

Anyone know?