BS: Quick read this

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: open mike
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 10:20 PM

the answer is yes..here are some examples..

    * "Not wild bird again!" Tom groused.
    * "No thanks to that Frenchman," said Tom mercilessly.
    * "There's one right outside that window," Tom alleged.
    * "I'm docking the boat again," Tom reported.
    * "Go ahead, it's perfectly safe to drink," Tom lied.
    * "I'm an umpire," Tom called out. (Aaron Hertzmann suggests      adding "self-referentially")
    * "Are you ready for your exam?!" Tom quizzed testily.
    * "What's that big orange fish?" asked Tom coyly.
    * "I'm taking you to court," Tom said plaintively.

# "It's a garbage disposal," he said succinctly.
# "You're not a real magician at all," Tom said, disillusioned.
# "Someone's killed Polly," he said, disparately.
# "That's the fifth day you've been out this month," Mrs. Jenkins remarked absently.
# "You can go in now," Tom admitted.
# It was a nice fabric, Tom felt.
# "And then another five makes nine!" Tom added.
# "The male bees do no work," Tom droned.
# "Well, you don't actually have to pay that penalty," Tom defined.

# "I hate flying," Tom complained.
# "Are you sure we can break in?" Tom asked guardedly.
# "I'm drunk," Tom whined.
# "The drink here isn't so good," Tom said groggily.
# "We were being followed," Tom said evasively.
# "There isn't enough food to go around," Tom rationalized.
# "This is a dogwood tree!" Tom barked.
# "She's old and ugly," Tom crooned.
# "This hypnotist isn't so great," Tom suggested.
# "We need more ice cubes," Tom chattered coldly.
# "This will get the stain out!" Tom shouted boldly.
# "I memorized that," Tom wrote.
# "Ouch!" Tom interjected.
# "Those trees -- they must be saved!" Tom cut in choppily.
# "These aren't grade A," Tom berated.
# "Ah'm an artist," Tom drawled sketchily.
# "This pencil needs sharpening," Tom pointed out, pointlessly.
# "The New Yorker comes out every week," Tom stated periodically.
# "Those lines have to stay together," Tom growled with pride.
# "This foreign red wine is for dignitaries only," Tom said importantly.
# "Are you a doctor?" Tom probed.
# "Are you an archaeologist?" Tom delved.
# "I'll make those pastries again," Tom retorted tartly.
# "Have you read Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead?" Tom questioned.
# "Aren't you Allen Funt?" Tom asked candidly.
# "You should cover up that cut," Tom bandied.
# "How about some venison?" Tom shot gamely.
# "Open this door," Tom pried.
# "Still in the U.S.S.R.," Tom read, sickly rushing through the letter.
# "In the tomb," Tom said cryptically.
# "Of a French pastry," Tom d'eclaired.
# "You won't live long if you don't believe in God," Tom preached diagnostically.
# "That's a hard line," Tom said stonily.
# "I wonder if this is big enough to be a lake," Tom pondered.
# "Pick another flower or two," Tom said morosely.
# "I wonder if it's all right to leave a crook with my kids," Tom considered.
# "Next to the sand trap?" Tom hazarded.
# "I bet they're playing in the grass," Tom gambled.
# "I want to stop playing these card games," Tom said wistfully.
# "This sausage is made from only the finest meat, Effendi," Tom salaamed.


http://www.webcom.com/~wutka/html/swifties.html
http://www.fun-with-words.com/tom_swifties.html
http://thinks.com/words/tomswift.htm
Legend has it Tom Swifties were created by satirist
Jonathan Swift, author of Gulliver�s Travels. Actually,
Tom Swifties were originated by Edward Stratemeyer
author and or creator of Hardy Boys, Bobbsey Twins
and Nancy Drew characters and/or books.

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: open mike
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 10:03 PM

are there some stories or jokes called tom swifties or jonathan swiftis?

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: Peace
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 09:06 PM

"A stopped clock is right twice a day too... "

Not if it's a 24-hour clock in a time warp.

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 05:54 PM

LTS -

That should be

"Read This Quickly"

should it not?

Or maybe:

"Read This Immediately."

or

"Y'all Better Look Rat NOW!"

Or maybe "Quick" is someone who was intended to be informed of a private message?

John

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: JennyO
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 12:54 PM

I'm sans a few other things as well

Nice to know it's covered, Liz. I was a bit worried there for a minute...

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 06:28 AM

Should that be "Quick, read this"? or "Quick read, this'? because I managed to do neither, being as I am at the moment, sans spectacles.

I'm sans a few other things as well but I think it's covered on another thread.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 01:04 AM

A stopped clock is right twice a day too...

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 06:49 PM

Pick a grid referance & a time.
Lets sort this out!
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 06:39 PM

Get a life troll!
Skipy

No

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 06:34 PM

Get a life troll!
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 06:30 PM

sh no sh no really sh

did you hear that feck it

bastards

il catch you yet.

carry on

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:53 PM

I always go down to the last one I opened, then read them going upwards from there till another takes my fancy, so I never get to read them in order going downwards.

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:42 PM

Same as a platton or flight of men (could be ladies) marching accross a bridge, the order "break step" is given so as not to cause the bridge to rock, the result is everyone "changes step" instead of changing to a walk, final result, the bridge rocks!
Interestingly if you are just walking down a street behind others there will come a moment in time when you are all in step.
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:35 PM

Wow, eh? Heavy, man. It, like, means somethin', don't it? Could the flippin' end be near?

- Shane

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: Peace
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:34 PM

Gotcha, Skipy.

They happen every now ad then. Right place at the right time . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:33 PM

o/k, it was a split second in time, should have wriiten it down,
these threads followed each other( where 7, can't remember what was last )
Sexiset women in u/k
Hannah Hauxwell
noted with very little comment
an interesting viewpoint on lebanon
photo fraud in lebanon coverage
is hezbollah winning.
made sense when you read them downwards, but you only had moment to do it.
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: Peace
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:23 PM

BS: Blind River bombs! 2 11 Aug 06 - 05:19 PM Trace
BS: New mudkitten 9 11 Aug 06 - 05:18 PM Trace
Buskers allowed in Santa Fe 3 11 Aug 06 - 05:18 PM Trace
BS: Origin of your mudcat handle 28 11 Aug 06 - 05:17 PM Trace
BS: Quick read this 8 11 Aug 06 - 05:17 PM Trace
BS: Admiration of women


Like, uh, that!

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:21 PM

Uh....what? Like...whaddya mean? Huh?

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: Peace
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:17 PM

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Next time take a copy and post it. They could become collectors' items in the years ahead.

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:16 PM

Sadly, it was a snapshot in time, you had to open this before the threads change position.
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: Peace
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:09 PM

I am SOOOOOO confused.

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:54 PM

Sadly "Guest" you missed the moment, like missing the train, or in your case missing a life oh faceless one.
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:52 PM

"ignore this"

I wish I had.

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:49 PM

ignore this + 3

Subject: RE: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:49 PM

make that 7 & ignore this + 2.
Skipy

Subject: BS: Quick read this
From: skipy
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:43 PM

if you ignore this thread + the one below it, the next 6 thread titles read down make sense.
You only have a moment to do this.
Skipy