BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!

Subject: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 08:26 AM

Hello, I reckon you cauld get free eclecricty from hamsters by connecting a litte generator to their wheel sometimes they run on it really fast.I got the idea of that bloke who made a wind up radio, I think he was called Jeremy Dyson or something.I dont think you will get much electrity but maybe enough to make a radio or a lighht work I, havent quite figured out exatly how to do it yet but I will think about it in the nect few days,If anybody knows about this knd of thing pleese let me know.kohn

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 08:28 AM

Especialy if everybody did this it would save a lot of energy.john

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 08:29 AM

Actually John, that's what powered Bill D's previous computer as well as supplying a part of it's memory and calculation functions. He upgraded about a year and a half or more ago though and I think he gave the hamsters to a local school although he kept the old computer.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Roger in Sheffield
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 09:31 AM

stop eating the hamster food john those hemp seeds are sending you man
I don't have a hamster john and I ain't sure about the economics of this, I get a small amount of free electricity (at night) but have to buy hamster food and ear plugs and look after the hamster

I suggest you do without the Hamster and get a mini wind turbine outside your house, free electricity when the wind blows, and it will annoy the neighbours. How about some solar cells too? Not sure of the value equivalent of solar to hamster in dull rainy Britain
Anyone else hungry?

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 09:45 AM

What about methane? Or perhaps just the passing wind from the farts would be enough to power a small turbine wheel and you could back it up with hamsters. Perhaps you could feed the hamsters a diet high in milk and veggies and capture the hamster farts, thus killing two birds with one stone, although I'd hate to kill a bird as they too might be a source of windpower, although I don't think they fart.

Spaw (lost in a Monty Python mode)

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Morticia
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 10:09 AM

John, have you ever thought of investing in plough horses? Of course, you'd have to adapt the hamster cage a little and I'm not sure that they could live on sunflower seeds alone but I bet they could power a whole flat with a big enough wheel.( Morti,also in MP mode)

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 10:09 AM

I thinkm this is agood idea butr nobody has thought about it properly.If this idea takes of the goverment could maybe get rid of power srations (they are bad for the sky) and employ loads of hamsters to make eletricity.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 10:17 AM

Mortie, I think the idea has merit! Now again, if you combine it with the windpower of a horse's fart to turn an impeller and the accompanying methane as a heat source, you could provide both electricity and heat to a small house I'd think. Heat would be an asset in this manner as it takes a lot of electricity to power the coils in an electric heater, but a methane burning furnace would do the job nicely and save considerably. Since hamsters hibernate in the cold, keeping the house warm would make them available at all times as a backup electrical source for small appliances.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 10:19 AM

I have sent an email to Yorkshire Electricity telling them about my idea, I have not had a reply yet.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 10:23 AM

I'm not surprised............

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: JenEllen
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 11:05 AM

Funny John, I had a similar thought once. (Of course, I was sober at the time :) It's cows. I suppose any ruminant would do, but my experience happened to be with cows.

The force of a belch from a bloated cow is enough to blow a baseball cap off of a human head. This could surely be used to power turbines. The methane produced is a terrific natural heating fuel that burns at roughly 200 HPU's (that's hamsters per..) and the projectiles that usually accompany this intestinal outestinal dry very quickly, and to a consistency that would make them perfect for filling in potholes in the street. So you have power, heat, and transportation problems solved. I know people who know math, and this could work.

Now, John, have a cuppa coffee, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 11:10 AM

Don't waste those cowchips on potholes! They're combustible fuel too!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Genie
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 11:59 AM

Spaw,
If a bird farts, does that make it a jet-propelled aircraft?

I like your horse's fart w/ impeller idea for "provid[ing] both electricity and heat to a small house," with the hamsters in a symbiotic power-supply back-up relationship.
But how about this: Hook your exercise bike up to a generator, with a fart-catching mechanism attached, too. Then eat a lot of broccoli, beans, etc., and pedal away! Turn off any other source of heat, and you'll be pedaling your arse off (literally) to stay warm and, given the right diet, probably producing a lot of valuable methane to boot.
You might never have to pay for power again!

Genie

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:13 PM

Genie, I agree with you. I think we're just beginning to plumb the depths of possibilities here. More research and ideas cannot be far on the horizon. I think John has stumbled (literally) onto something. I just hope he hasn't stepped in it.

Has Yorkshire Electricity sent anyone to your door yet John? They may be wearing white coats. Go with them.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Roger in Sheffield
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:23 PM

Genie I think you are on to something with the Broccoli, I can't touch the stuff. The methane output per floret is beyond belief
As always these discoveries can used for good or bad, before you know it there could be Hamster grenades - Hamsters stuffed full of Brocolli

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:24 PM

How did the hamsters capture the electricity, and has it been liberated yet? IS dancing involved? Are there Morris-dancing Hamsters?

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Amos
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:25 PM

I agree with Spaw absolutely that we are just beginning to plumb the depths of something. That's for sure. As to what it is we are plumbing, sounds more like large mammals tuh me...

A

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:45 PM

Ya' know if the right kind of facility was built, perhaps we could power up all of Hull with manatee power! Individual tanks with a center section making it impossiblefor them to turn around would force them to swim in one direction only and the concurrent current (so to speak) would spin a gear reduced turbine wheel. Enough of these running in series would produce sufficient current to run a city like Hull with an operating expense of only lettuce or other greenery. This would solve the manatee problem and free up all that valuable river and lake territory for 300 HP Bass Boats and jet skis by the thousands! Certainly a noble cause if there ever was one!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Maxine
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:51 PM

What about a dead parrot (who mentioned Monty Python mode?) Surely, a rotting parrot must give off heap loads of methane (or similar) However, I really have no idea what I'm talking about....but then it seems neither do any of you crazy lot! John, any news from Yorkshire Leccy Board yet?

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 12:54 PM

I dunno' Maxine.......perhaps the "white coat squad" has already showed up on his doorstep.....

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Roger in Sheffield
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 01:01 PM

.....mors likely he has fallen asleep full of beer and is dreaming of hamsters, electricity and more beer

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Maxine
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 01:46 PM

Hey, as long as that's all he's dreaming of, I say, let him sleep. Goodness knows, it sure sounds like he needs it!

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 01:52 PM

Well, at last a thread that's actually about something substantial, important and meaningful!

Hamsters are a handy source of electrical generation power, but it requires a rather hefty initial investment...cage, exercise wheel, water bottle, seeds, vitamin drops, bedding...so it takes years before the electrical output returns your investment, and a hamster only lives 2 to 4 years, so the little beast may kick the bucket before your investment is even half paid off!

Now, there's another problem...adult hamsters are solitary. They will endeavour to kill any other hamster they find in their cage. If this were not so, then one could invest in a larger cage with multiple exercise wheels, and really generate lots of power...but the hostile attitude of hamsters toward each other renders this concept unfeasible!

Your hero and mine, Captain James T. Kirk of the starship Enterprise, tried to realize a similar scheme, generating power with tribbles, who require virtually no upkeep (they live on air), and who breed like rabbits only WISH they could.

This idea, however, failed dismally, because it turned out that tribbles are extraordinarily sedentary, sloth-like creatures, content to merely wiggle and squeak every now and then, and entirely unwilling to run on any exercise wheel or similiar power-generating device.

Although it doesn't cost anything to keep tribbles, one doesn't get anything back from them either, it seems, except some light entertainment.

There's a lesson somewhere in all this...

By the way, I NEVER got to see "Hamsterdance", because I came too late to the wonders of the Internet! Does anyone know how I can get to see Hamsterdance? My life will not be complete until I do!

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 02:00 PM

Yeah, that the "Trouble with Tribbles" ain't it?

Well, things have changed over at the joint, but you can meet the hamsters HERE

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Morticia
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 02:26 PM

I'm not ready to give up on horse potential just yet because if you've ever been at the south end of a dobbin just after it's eaten wet hay, you will know that NOTHING, but nothing can produce that much methane and not explode except a horse ( or possibly my brother after a feed of brussel sprouts).Now with a really BIG wheel, and a few tons of wet hay, I reckon we can heat the whole of Hull...of course, John needs to be living in a biggish flat....and live permanantly in a NBC suit and gas mask...but I think it's worth the sacrifice.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 02:26 PM

I have just woken up, i still haven't got a repluy off Yorkshire Electricity.I think they must be closed for the holidays.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: hesperis
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 02:59 PM

I've seen hamsters dance in REAL LIFE! Now that's impressive.

;)

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Gareth
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 03:20 PM

On the other hand we could ring up a few Sheep as a form of static electicity "Van de Graf" generator.

Just think with Wales wooley back resources we could export the power to the English !

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 03:29 PM

I'd really fear that rubbing a sheep would look even worse to the folks at Yorkshire Electricity, but talk about killing two birds with one stone! John could get his electricity on and his rocks off at the same time!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 03:33 PM

Two thoughts occur to me, the first is that I've heard people say that they had to get up at sparrow fart, when they mean early. So that answers Spaw's question. The other one is about Hamsterdance, did not Max Bygraves sing about "Tulips from Hamsterdance" in a previous lifetime?? Unfortunately Tiny Tim died before he could record "Tiptoe through the Hamsters", undoubtedly a sad loss for the world.
Jock...Scottish branch of the NYHFTTS.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: katlaughing
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 03:41 PM

Tiny Tim died? When??:-(

Spaw, THIS is the first hamster dance I remember seeing on the Mudcat; shocked the hell outta me 'cause I didn't know how demented ya'll were back then!

kat

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: JenEllen
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 03:46 PM

Well, like I said, I know people who know math, and I have just been informed by the brain trust around the kitchen table that there is a way to 'theoretically' cram hamsters into a cylinder to such a degree that critical mass is attained and when one more is added, viol-a, fusion. Diagrams are being drawn (in crayon) for the folks at Yorkshire Electricity, should the need arise.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Amos
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 03:50 PM

Demented, aye!!

How about having the hamsters in serial, pursuing the one in front, on treadmills? Their ferocity would increase the output proportionately to the length of the chain. Or, have then run up and down on sheepsback, generating static charges.

This is the nutsiest folk-engineering I have ever seen! I dunno why I even open threads like this!! LOL!!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: JenEllen
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 04:16 PM

What? And end up with thousands of little hamsters in the clinic suffering from sheep-shock? Cramming them into incredibly tight places is much more humane....

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: GUEST,Paul
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 04:19 PM

John,

You'd get better efficiency by burning the hamster's food to power a turbine, and doing away with the hamster all together.

About 5 times as much power, I think. I'd have to look at a few books to calculate it more accurately.

Paul

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Devilmaster
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 04:25 PM

Or how bout this....

we put John's and Spaw's entire head into a pipe, and the steam that comes out of their ears thinking up this stuff, would turn a steam turbine.

California's energy woes would be over!

:) steve

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 04:30 PM

Well it was only an idea.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Willa
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 05:05 PM

Hi, John; should have guessed this was your thread! Trevor Bayliss was the chap who developed the wind-up radio. I have one of the wind-up torches that he went on to develop; got it for a Christmas present last year, and it's been very useful. James Dyson invented the bagless vacuum cleaner - I have one of those too. There is a website set up by Trevor Bayliss which you can contact if you have an idea for an invention, but I don't know the address. Yorkshire Electricity won't be very interested in any idea which might 'hamster' their development!! *BG* Happy New Year.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Amos
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 07:37 PM

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!! That was a close shaving indeed!! Back to the treadmill witcha!!!

A.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Devilmaster
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 08:06 PM

well, I was just joking John...

What you basically need, is the wheel connected to something that spins.... like an old bicycle speedometer. This is turn needs to crank a small turbine, which runs into a transformer to up the voltage. Then run that into a battery, sorta like a trickle charge. then use that battery to power things. the transformer, (basically a square magnet, with wires wrapped around, will have to be pretty big to turn the small amount of energy from the wheel into something half useful.

Thats about as far as my grade 12 science will take me.

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: allie kiwi
Date: 27 Dec 01 - 08:10 PM

I was just reading a book about POW's, and in Laufen prison camp during WW2 a guy made a miniature tank that was poswered by two mice running around (as mice do) on a wheel...

Allie

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: GUEST,Souter
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 02:42 AM

Apparently they used to do that in Belgium with dogs.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: GUEST,Neatsfoot
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 03:20 AM

Morticia:
Must agree about the hind end of dobbin
BUT the noble cow BELCHES huge amounts of methane along with her prodigious farts
Don't panic ~ it's organic
Really useful amounts of methane AND topsoil could be harvested from a resource we are currently disposing|discarding @ great expense--human waste ....
The solar|electric equation is getting pretty good in terms of both efficiency and cost
~ if you live in a sunny clime like mine, mb.ca
wind is getting good results too even if it does annoy the neighbours; seems to make sense in less sunny|more windy places [Like Hull?]
What a thread! But let's maintain the levity AND the deeply serious issues.

~ huge fan of the Mudcat forum

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 03:34 AM

Electricity from Hamsters! Burning hamster's food might work, there are pellet stoves are there not? Of course if you burned up all the hamster food what would happen to the poor hamsters, eh? Didn't think of that did you? Oh no it's just perfectly OK to go from enslaving tiny rodents to arbitrarily doing away with their food supply. Is this some sort of hamsterocide thread? Eh? Are you despotic technocrats running out of ideas for the enslavement of mankind and now you have to turn to helpless furry creatures whose soft singing leaves the soul ensoothed? What gall! I am completely unhinged by the entire concept.

I DO wish Toby hadn't eaten that last biscuit. hard to keep body together much less soul.

guns...hamsters.. it'll be squeezing the oil from old orange peels next or knicker recycling. CB

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: catspaw49
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 07:23 AM

Well Coyote Breath, I DID cover some recycling, Christmas Tree recycling to be exact, when I told the tale of how I met Cletus, Paw, and Buford.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: MudGuard
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 08:17 AM

Devilmaster, a transformer will not help in gaining energy. On the contrary, it will loose some electrical energy and produce some heat.

What it will do is (depending on how it is used) either reduce amperes and increase voltage or viceversa - except for the heat loss the product of amperes and voltage is the same on both ends of a transformer.

And instead of using such a complicated mechanism as you suggest (connect the wheels to something that spins), it would be much easier to use a bicycle hub dynamo and build the hamster treadmill from that - this will reduce mechanical loss of energy (friction --> heat) to a minimum. If the treadmill has a diameter the same as a bicycle wheel (28") the weight of a hamster is enough to start the thing turning - I know because I got such a bike hub dynamo in my little bicycle.

And if you use instead of lightbulbs some of the new super-bright LEDs you can get quite a lot of light out of a little hamster.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Noreen
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 08:41 AM

*grin*...I think John may have to get a new hamster cage to house a 28" exercise wheel!

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: MudGuard
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 08:45 AM

He could do it the other way round - just put meshwire (or whatever the stuff is called) between the spokes and use the treadmill as cage...

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: Dicho (Frank Staplin)
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 03:32 PM

The vegans complain about the contibution to greenhouse gases and planetary warming by cattle. Now if we take all the cattle and compare their output with that of all the humans- especially those on a vegetarian diet- what would the comparative figures be?
Now we are talking about harnessing real volumes of energy- much more economic than running poor little hamsters to death.

Subject: RE: BS: Free Electricity From Hamsters!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 01 - 04:21 PM

Save gas....Fart in a bottle..