Song Challenge! Part 3

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 11:45 AM

Ok, Aine, I just feel I have to put it on the record that right after I posted "Fred Dyer's Bees", your very next entry said:

---

"Well, excuse me while I pick myself off of the floor! "

---

I submit to the panel that this constitutes prima facie evidence of qualification for the Harp! :>) (How do I get into these things?? What's wrong with me? Mutter, mutter....).

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: GUEST,Mbo
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:13 PM

Breaker one nine, this is Mother Bee
I got a copy on that drone, come on in!
Gosh golly gee--we got a clear cut right to Honeytown
Ten four Worker Wilma thats a lot of bees
Mercy sakes alive, looks like we got ourselves a SWARM!

It was in the heat of the sun, we were making a run
We all were loaded and haulin'
Some worker bees and a couple drones with a big ol' load of pollen
We were headed way back to our hive
About a mile from a grassy lea
I said Wilma, this here's the Mother Bee
I'm gonna try and go Mach 3

Chorus:
Cause we got a great big bee swarm rocking through the sky
We got a great big bee swarm, don't it make you wanna cry?
Come and join our bee swarm, we're headed back to our lair
We're gonna buzz this great bee swarm right across the air
Bee swarm!

Breaker Wilma, this here's the Mother Bee
You wanna back off those drones
Ten four, about 6 feet or so
Ten roger them drones is hittin' on the ladies again

By the time we reached the sunny spot, we had 50 million bees in all
There was a white van up on the grassy lea
And there were humans large and small
There were scientists thick as hot beeswax
They even had a couple in boats
I said "All trucks, it's me, the Mother Bee
We're a gonna chase some white lab coats"

You wanna give me a ten nine on that Wilma?
Negatory Wilma, those drones are still to close
Yeah those little buggers are making me mad
You better back off another 6

Well we flew up that sunny sky like a storm of wind and rain
We pulled our pollen baskets out and strapped 'em down again
By the time we got to the forest those coats tried something new
They'd brought up reinforcements from East Carolina U
There's vans and cars and golf carts, and buses of purple hue
Those little motes were full of coats and transmitters stuck like glue
We shot ahead the whole nine yards, with a billion screaming wings
And five lost icheneumons, and 8 hornets without stings

Mother Bee, this here is Worker Wilma, come on
Ten four Wilma, want you to move those icheneumons
Way back behind the drones
Remember, we live in a tree, and those ichies will eat it up

We laid a path from the cityscape to our old familiar tree
I saw belong a hundred coats below with kettles full of steam
I said "Wilma, this here's the Mother Bee, and this ain't the time to lose
So drop some pollen and make 'em sneeze--and let that honey ooze, ten four"

Ten four Wilma. what's your twenty?
Battle Creek?
They're gonna love that honey up there for sure
Well mercy sakes, good buzzy, we're gonna fly on out of here
Keep the stinger on your buns and the coats off your tail
We'll catch you on the flippity-flop
This here's the Mother Bee on the side
We gone bye bye.


Hmmm...bees with transistors. Interesting idea.

--Mbo, ten four

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Metchosin
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:23 PM

see Amos, you're jumpin' the gun, countin' your chips before the games over.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:26 PM

L'il Mbo, you done it good! Damn, but that was fine!
Now, who'da thunk you'd go all the way back
To 1979?
With a breaker there! an' a Bear in the Air! An' a song about a Truck!
So, close ma lip! You take the Chip!
An' I won' give a ...(...'spaw? Whut rhymes with "truck"???)

A

(seriously, Mbo, that was red hot! I loved it!)

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: catspaw49
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:31 PM

Cleigh is more than willing to lend his name to such a prestigious award. He thinks that "Blue Fume" would somehow fit better. Feel free to write him at his website---www.assblownout.rip

(Its my day for websites I guess)

Spaw

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:39 PM

You'n me both Metchosin. I'm real worried about that Talkin' Blues! But it maybe that Mbo has blown our doors off!

Who would have thought he would pull down "Convoy" as a template!! Sheeshe!

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: MMario
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:39 PM

Mbo - that's hysterical! and GOOD!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: catspaw49
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:44 PM

buck, duck, huck, luck, muck, puck, ruck, tuck, yuck, chuck, woodchuck, cluck, kluck, stuck, struck, moonstruck, dumbstruck, upchuck, shuck...........Anything you can use there Amos?

Spaw

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: MMario
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:50 PM

'Spaw, you forgot --uck, yeuch, geoduck,

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 12:57 PM

Geoduck!!! That's it!! I can use geoduck!!

With a breaker there! an' a Bear in the Air! An' a song about a Truck!
So, close ma lip! You take the Chip!
An' I won' give a ..Geoduck!!

Boy, that's great! Scans an evvythin'!!Hot damn!! Geodu....say, what is a geoduck anyway??

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Metchosin
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 01:07 PM

A geoduck is a mighty fine thing Fits right in to the Mollusca group
Tastes real good in a creamy soup
Or on the half shell, mighty fine fare, sort of a King clam.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Blackcat2
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 01:08 PM

I believe it's a type of clam.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: MMario
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 01:13 PM

only chewier

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Metchosin
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 01:13 PM

oops A goeoduck is a mighty fine thing
Got a neck all long and green
Fits right in to the Mollusca group
Tastes real good in a creamy soup
Or on the half shell, mighty fine fare, sort of a King clam

somehow lost a line in transmission.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 01:18 PM

Longer I live, the more I forget, and that was one of 'em! Thanks for the rhyming definition! Come to think of it I think Mbo should write a song about Geoducks! See what kind of rhymes he comes up with! No help from Spaw!

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 02:32 PM

Struck gold this time Áine. Or at least honey.

While we're on the subject:
Oh what a glorious thing to be,
A healthy grown-up Busy Buzzy Bee,
Whiling away the passing hours,
Pinching all the pollen from the corn field flowers.

That's from the song Arthur Askey used to perform - The Busy Buzzy Bee. Anyone have the rest of the words, because they're good. The International Lyrics Fin=der or whatever they call it doesn't even recognise that Arthur Askey ever existed - thus confirming that it's a crap site. So we should try and get it on the DT on principle.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 04:07 PM

For such a new 'Mudcat Tradition' (?), the SONG CHALLENGE! has turned up a wondrous bunch of nutters (and songwriters)!! If you haven't seen it yet, I've updated the 'Additions to Mudcat Songbook' thread and announced the winners of the SC!3 contest. I've also rearranged the Songbook page to set up a special category for the SONG CHALLENGE! Winners. I've got some ideas for more changes that I'll begin work on this weekend, the Good Lord willing and the creek don't rise...

***********ANNOUNCEMENTS************

Here are the agreed prize categories for the SONG CHALLENGE! entries. Good luck to all of you! (Note: Some awards have been given out already to past winners. Songs, authors and awards to be designated in the new version of the Songbook page sometime in the near future)

***************************************

Golden Cow Chip Awards are given to all winners of the SONG CHALLENGE! Contest. These permanent awards and should be displayed proudly and prominently on your mantel. There is one caveat, however. If I find out that any receiver of the Golden Cow Chip Award has used their trophy in a local (or international) cow chip tossing contest, said Chip will be confiscated immediately and awarded to another Song Challenger.

The Shamrock Cluster is awarded for a high level of imagination in a song.

The Harp Ribbon is given for being able to make me fall on the floor laughing OR short out my keyboard with tears.

The Guinness Crest is awarded for causing BOTH Harp Ribbon conditions within one song.

Cleigh's Blue Fume Award is given to the best blues rendition of any challenge topic.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 04:13 PM

You are too much, Sister Aine. You're not a Mennonite by any chance?

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 09:41 PM

***************ATTENTION SONG CHALLENGERS*****************

Check out the Brand New SONG CHALLENGE! WINNERS Page, complete with all the awards described above. I did this in a hurry (after all, it IS hockey night!), so if you would like to lodge a grievance with the Keeper of the Book concerning what award your song has been given, please feel free. **Just remember to keep your tongue firmly in cheek**

Enjoy and keep playing, singing, and writing! -- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 10:30 PM

Now, which cheek (and whose) should we be concentrating on here, oh Keeper? :>>))

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 03 Feb 00 - 10:36 PM

Dear Áine:

Beautiful job!! And for a hockey night, too!! Way to go.

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Sorcha
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 12:17 AM

Oh, Aine, you're a WONDER! I can't imagine trying to keep up with all the creativity that has been happenig here in the last few days! I am not a lyricist, but I can't help but wonder what has happened to the melody "Thunder Road" on this thread. Love, Sorcha

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: fulurum
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 12:29 AM

with all this talk about bees and stuff i just want to remind everybody in order to stay healthy, eat your honey.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Metchosin
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 02:38 AM

Yahoo!!

Thank you Aine! Ma'am, I'm, honoured to be the first female winner of this prestigious award. (come on ladies, don't make me feel so lonely, sharpen your pencils)

Thank you too Aine, for all the dedication and effort in getting this up and running.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 07:58 AM

I'm glad that y'all like it! I can't think of a finer group that deserves the Golden Cow Chip Award -- and I mean that in the nicest way ;-).

Here's to the Song Challengers that make all the (fun) work worthwhile!

Keep playing, singing, and writing! -- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 08:33 AM

I told my honey about the fulurum's advice in this hyar thread an' she said it weren't gonna happen. NOW whut do I do??

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: MMario
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 09:11 AM

That's simple amos, you write a new song about it, blues by preference.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 09:34 AM

Maybe a country western approach: "The Doctor Says To Eat Ma Honey, But Ma Honey Says No Way".

We can put it on one of 'Spaw's porn sites up there next to the "Muff Diver's Lament" and "Pink Pearls For my Pickle". ANd that, dear friends, is all I'm gonna say about that.

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 09:45 AM

Thank goodness!!

-- Á.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 09:58 AM

Sorreeeee!:>)

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Mbo
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 10:03 AM

Thanks for the page, Aine! I'm going to wear my award with honor...and don't worry, I'm going to make a recording of your song--but it'll have to wait till next week.

--Mbo

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Barbara
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 12:58 PM

Now that the dust has settled, let me share this poem with y'all, tho I think perhaps some of you already know it. I only typed about half of it, and the rest is just as good, so maybe if this thread's still around when I get back from Rainy Camp Sunday, I'll post the rest.
What's the french for "The more things change, the more they stay the same?
Blessings,
Barbara
Here's [part of] a poem written by E.B. White at least 50 years ago:

Song of the Queen Bee

"The breeding of the bee," says the US Department of Agriculture bulletin on artificial insemination, "has always been handicapped by the fact that the queen mates in the air with whatever drone she encounters."

When the air is wine and the wind is free
And the morning sits on the lovely lea
And sunlight ripples on evey tree,
Then love-in-the-air is the thing for me --
I'm a bee,
I'm a ravishing, rollicking, young queen bee,
That's me.

I wish to state that I think it's great,
Oh, it's simply rare in the upper air,
It's the place to pair
with a bee.
Let old geneticists plot and plan,
They're stuffy people to a man;
Letgossips whisper behind their fan.
(Oh, she does?
Buzz, buzz, buzz!)
My nuptial flight is sheer delight;
I'm a giddy girl who likes to swirl;
To fly and soar
And fly some more,
I'm a bee.
And I wish to state that I'll always mate
With whatever drone I encounter.

There's a kind of wild and glad elation
In the natural way of insemination'
Who thinks that love is a handicap
Is a fuddydud and a common sap,
For I am a queen and I am a bee,
I'm devil-may-care and I'm fancy-free,
The test tube doesn't appeal to me
Not me,
I'm a bee.
And I'm here to state that I'll always mate
With whatever drone I encounter
.

Let mares and cows, by calculating
Improve themseves with loveless mating,
Let groundlings breed in the modern fashion;
I'll stick to the air and the grand old passionv I may be small and I'm just a bee
Not me,
I'm a bee.
On a day that's fair with a wind that's free,
Any old drone is the lad for me.
But I won't have Science improving on me.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 01:01 PM

Wow!! That's a hummmm-dinger! (Or should that be buzzzz-dinger?)

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Barbara
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 01:05 PM

Oops, screwed up the last verse. It should read:

Let mares and cows, by calculating
Improve themseves with loveless mating,
Let groundlings breed in the modern fashion;
I'll stick to the air and the grand old passion
I may be small and I'm just a bee
But I won't have Science improving on me.
Not me.
I'm a bee.
On a day that's fair with a wind that's free,
Any old drone is the lad for me.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 02:52 PM

Thank you for the poem, Barbara. Let us all hope the Queen Bee (toujours gai!) remains un-dioded and antennaed and doing the nasty in mid-air forever!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 02:57 PM

Forever? Wow, that's a concept of truly transcendental proportions! I mean, prodigious!!

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: MMario
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 03:01 PM

HEY! Do you gals realize that each and every one of those poor drones mating with the Princess (for she is not truly a Queen until fertile and laying eggs) is eviscarated by that high flying tease at the moment of completion! yeesh! Not to mention the fact that she is so selfish she doesn't even pass on his genes to her sons, only her own?

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 03:23 PM

Leave it to you, MMario, to know (or go and research) all the 'ins and outs' of bee business!! I don't know . . . maybe that's why they call it 'MOTHER Nature' . . .

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Micca
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 03:27 PM

Barbara the phrase is I believe "plus ca change, plus ca le meme chose" both the cs in "ca" have the squiggle below and the first e in meme has the "tiled roof" above.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 03:33 PM

"Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose." (chose is feminine). The accents are circonflex over the e in "meme", with those little cedillas under the "c"s.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 03:56 PM

Dear Micca,

Please ignore the upstart -- someone referred to him as 'Superman' on another thread as in A. M.(an) O.(f) S.(teel), and he's just a got a big head today. ;>) Give just one Golden Cow Chip to somebody and see what a showoff he becomes? Hey Amos, leave my good buddy Micca alone, or me and my homeboys, Accent Grave and Accent Acute, will circonflex your cedilla for ya!! Yea, just get up in these guys' faces and they'll open up a big box of whup-urú on ya, too! And their fadas are bigger than your tildes any day, esse!!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 04:09 PM

Dis, donc, la copine!! C'est le ver envers, pour vrai! Alors, puisque tu la trouve amusant me faire sembler si mechant, n'cri plus pur Superman le prochaine fois qu'on t'attaque la voix! J'ne sais point qu'j'ai fait te rendre si fachee!! Accent ague, Accent ague!! Au secours! J'm'en fous de cette reynardette!

Fondly,

Amos

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 04:27 PM

Ní thuigim thú ar bith, a chara chóir. Déanim dearmad ar fad ar mo Fhraincis, agus is mór an trua é! B'fheidir go raibh mé níos crua ort. Gabh mo leithscéal, a stóor. An mbeidh muid cairde le chéile arís, nach mbeidh?

Le gach dea-ghuí, Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 04:29 PM

Please pay no attention to my evil twin from Quebec -- he's in town for the day and has a Gallic temper. I, on the other hand, seek always to be a gent when it is possible. So let me reassure all threaders here present that I had no intent to upstart, downplay, overshadow, cross-post, upstage, overwhelm, undermine or overshadow any of the first rate posters here, and in fact don't see the basis in my little post for a reaction of this scale!

Micca answered the question correctly and I just added a small enhancement. Wherefore, then, have I been so lambasted, madam, so roundly grilled, carved, diced and served up as offal?

Sigh. Woe.

Ah, well, perhaps my bother is right this time. Sigh. (Wipes tear). SIGH.

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 04:33 PM

I just hit the translate button on your charming post and it doesna do Gaelic. Trade ya!!

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 05:01 PM

Ok, darlin' Amos, I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours . . .

"I don't understand you at all, dear friend. I've completely forgotten my French, and more's the pity! Perhaps I was too hard on you. I apologize, darlin'. We'll be friends again, won't we?"

There ya go, A Man Of Steel! Your turn . . .

-- Áine

(I really was jez' kiddin' 'bout the can of whup-urú!)

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 05:12 PM

There's the lass I know an' love! Now as for my wicked Quebecois brother, he was a bit confused, not understanding the nature of the dynamics here on the Cat. So bear with him -- he was reallly sorta spinning out here. What he said was...roughly translated...

"Hey, chum! Is this a turning worm? OK, if it amuses you to make me look bad, just don't call on Superman the next time some slimeball attacks your vocal charms. I just don't know at all what I have done to anger you so!!! Accent "ague", accent "ague"!! (At this point he was losing it). "Help! Rescue me!...Oh, pox on this foxy vixen!!"

Perhaps I should tell him to consult me before posting in the future.

Friends again and aye, dear Aine. Glad you're on my side, though!!

Love,

A. (I hope you still are in spite of my brother's pique).

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Áine
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 05:21 PM

Oh, a stór, I can put up with your evil twin brother if you can put up with my evil red-headed stepsister!

Le ghrá, Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: Amos
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 05:36 PM

A clabog for Super cladhaire, Ms A. Done.

A

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 3
From: The Shambles
Date: 04 Feb 00 - 07:02 PM

I'm a Ping bee.

Well, I'm a ping bee
Buzzing around your hive
Yes, I'm a ping bee
Buzzing around your hive
I can buzz better baby, when my signals live

Well, I'm a ping bee
I can buzz all night long
Yes, I'm a ping bee
Can buzz all night long
I can buzz better baby when my batteries strong

I'm a ping bee
Want you to be my queen
Well, I'm a ping bee
Want you to be my queen
Together you and me honey, make a scientist's dream

I'm a ping bee
I think there is something wrong
I'm a ping bee
I think there is something wrong
Some wires have got crossed, the buzzing getting strong

I'm a ping bee
And I'm out of luck
I'm a ping bee
And I'm out of luck
Blue sparks are flying, feels like lightning's struck

I'm a ping bee
My current's gone away
I'm a ping bee
My currents gone away
I was super-charged honey, now I've had my day