BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.

Subject: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: 42
Date: 20 May 04 - 05:12 PM

Does anyone have any suggestions for a constitution for my new club?
The Sensitive Singer/Songwriter Spousal Support Society

j

this may have been better created as a BS thread but I am serious

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: Joe Offer
Date: 20 May 04 - 05:22 PM

42, I wish you lots of success with your new club, and I sincerely hope the alimony doesn't bankrupt you. Actually, if you're a singer-songwriter, you're probably not making any money, and the ex should be paying YOU support.

Hope you don't mind too terribly that I changed the category of your thread.

-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: 42
Date: 20 May 04 - 05:39 PM

not a bit although I was hoping to attract some input from musicians and their loved ones.

j

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: Bobert
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:30 PM

Sorry, pal, but rather than try to force yer spouse ot be supportive thru some kinda "constitiution" just divorce the gal, go down to yer local "open mike" and get a new one... I mean, you ain't gonna change this one...

Jus MO...

Bobert

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 May 04 - 10:06 PM

What???? You're joking, I presume? A constitution? Get real.

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 20 May 04 - 10:17 PM

You'd start out with a set of aims. I suppose there might be some dispute as to whether the main aim would be to support the spouses of songwriters in reforming them, or in learning to put up with them, or in getting rid of them altogether...Or all three, according to preference?

And what about when they tend to be insensitive songwriters? At least so far as the spouses are concerned?

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: 42
Date: 20 May 04 - 11:00 PM

no joke. just looking for insight.

divorce the guy Bobert.

the whole SSSSSS thing was his last coherent thought.

j
LH a strong constitution can almost make up for any other weakness

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 20 May 04 - 11:29 PM

Whew, you've got me thinkin' on several levels here...

First)   SSsSSssSSSSssSsssSSss is tablature I have developed for my musical saw. It shows the "S" curve changes you would cause the blade of the instrument to assume if you were playing that good old song called "Roll Your Leg Over The Man In The Moon".

Second) You've got me thinking about the guy who had been married seven different times before he finally swore off marriage. I asked him what his life was like now and he answered, "These days I don't even think about marriage. But I guess I'm sort of into the pattern. Every few years I just find a woman who hates me --- and I give her my house."

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: harpgirl
Date: 20 May 04 - 11:37 PM

Every few years I find a man who hates me and I take his house!

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: dianavan
Date: 21 May 04 - 12:54 AM

I guess I qualify to post on this thread since I have lived with two different musicians for long periods of time. Spousal support? Never did see any of that. Seems I supported them and they helped to support the kids. Seemed fair at the time.

The first was a blues and folk guitar player and singer. He needed lots of support. I used to feel kinda sad when he played the blues because he sounded so sad. I was pretty young but since I still know him, I can say that was a pretty accurate assessment. I also resented the way I seemed to be some sort of accessory to his 'trip'. Since then, I have realized that I needed my own 'trip'.

The next was a jazz musician and composer. He built a sound proof room and used to lock himself away for hours at a time. He was a very mellow person and very easy to live with. Although he was a step-father to my kids, he was an excellent role model. Support me? No. He did, however, pay for the 'extras' for the kids. Piano lessons, flute, soccer, ballet, etc. He also cooked alot. That was fair enough for me. His music was very 'cerebral' and we all benefitted. Too bad he got a brain tumor.

Actually there was a third but I don't like to think about it too much. A jazz pianist with mental health problems. When we broke up, he burned down the apartment - while he was still in it! Not very supportive at all!

A spousal support group? Get real, most spouses are probably just trying to survive, let alone give any support to anyone else.

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: GUEST
Date: 21 May 04 - 01:41 AM

Actually you would use the same tablature (SSSSSSSSSSSsssssssssssssssSSSssSSSsssssSSSS) to play either "Stand By Your Man", "Molly Darling", "Barbara Allen" or "The Death Of Queen Jane" !-----------------It's just a matter of accent, inuendo and/or how much bend and curve you give to the steel. Also what the humidity is that day and whether or not a tornado is passing by at the moment. It's like bending notes on a blues harp----or trying to play "The Typewriter Song", "The Minute Waltz" or "Carmina Burana" on an out-of-tune Dulciola or Autoharp. Marriage?? GOOD LUCK!!

As Joseph Campbell was so fond of saying, "Go forward with the big adventure and joyously participate in the sorrows of your life." Ah, yes, if ya don't have a sense o' humor, it isn't funny. **BIG SMILE**

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 21 May 04 - 01:47 AM

Dianavan,

I think I love you !! We said the same thing. ;-)

Art

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: 42
Date: 21 May 04 - 07:27 AM

D

the idea is more a gathering of sufferers - like AA - where S/SS Spouses can get together and discuss strategies, compare afflictions and find some comfort while their "other halves" are playing.

i hadn't thought of it in a pecuniary way. Being the S/SS half of my abusive relationship (he'd say abusive on my part) as well as the financially productive and stable three quarters of same...it just hadn't occurred to me to have a "spousal support society".

the S/SSSSS is supposed to be the Dudley Do Right bad guy's hisss of derision and loathing.

j

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: GUEST,Mr Red in ex-spouse-aroused mode
Date: 21 May 04 - 07:53 AM

Speaking from personal experience the best presnt my ex-wife gave me was divorce. If she knew I would be so happy and start singing & writing songs .................. doesn't bear thinking about.

But if you have the motivation you can write a song about anything - and you only need an audience of one - and in my case some of the songs were just for one person. In some cases the rest of the audience were mere onlookers. In the one person was the only audience. You can say somethings in song that come out all awkward any other way. the OTT threshold is higher with music. AND the message can be repeated more easily just by singing it again.

No ideas on constitution - songwriting blossoms best outside a rigid framework but

critique at the wrong time is devastation - like during the creative surge. and if you are looking "support" the word NO is a not too helpful on both counts.

thats the best I can do on a Friday at work.

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: MAG
Date: 21 May 04 - 10:05 AM

If you've got health insurance, 42, go straight for the marital counseling.

Can this marriage be saved?

Why bother? Is it worth the trouble?

If you are both so miserable you think you're being abused, it's way past time for professional help.

and remember, there are worse things than being alone.

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: 42
Date: 21 May 04 - 04:38 PM

Thanks MAG - the relationship in question has been over for some time and I love being on my own. The kids have flown. The nest is tidy and I can pick up the guitar whenever and with whomever I desire.

I'm just sorry it took me twenty five years.

j

Subject: RE: BS: S.S.S.S.S.S.
From: jimmyt
Date: 21 May 04 - 04:42 PM

SSSSSSSSSSSounds like a SSSSSSSnake