BS: Gay Trees

Subject: BS: Gay Trees
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:58 AM

From the Associated Press:

...unlike most tree species common in the U.S., the ginkgo is dioecious, meaning trees are male or female. Female ginkgoes produce the troublesome seeds, which are covered in a fleshy coating that contains butyric acid, also found in rancid butter.

That has prompted cities such as Bloomington, Minn., and Lexington, Ky., to ban female ginkgoes. And Easton left the male trees while removing the females.

The problem, though, is occasionally male trees undergo a metamorphosis and begin dropping smelly seeds. That's what Robinson suspects happened to an Iowa City tree after decades without problems.

A study in Virginia found that such changes are rare, happening in about one in 100 male trees.

Gay ginkgoes finally come out of the closet only to be met with hatred and even death. "Real" females are killed, and that will eventually destroy ALL ginkgoes.

And nothing is being done to stop this...this genocide of what is also called the "Maidenhair Tree."

I am affronted.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Mrrzy
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:59 AM

Transsexual trees, maybe?

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:01 AM

Yes! And they are being killed, murdered, because of that!

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Wesley S
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:29 AM

Mrrzy - Exactly. These are transexual trees - Not gay trees. Even though they share some similar issues due to discrimination they are not the same thing at all. We need to be sensitive to their differences and not lump them all together.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Charley Noble
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:40 AM

Indeed, "transexual trees." Rapaire is barking up the wrong tree!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 12:04 PM

Heterogametic, perhaps?

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Eric the Viking
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 12:06 PM

The problem with the human species is that we were here last but think we own the place. Hug a tree, show it love no matter what it's sexuallity I say....just off to hug a bush (We don't have trees on Orkney..the wind blows them down)

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 02:32 PM

I believe the correct term is "transgender" and not "transsexual." And if anyone who plants ginkgoes had read any basic book on trees (or had a class in the "Morphology of Plants" as I did), this wouldn't have come as a surprise.

I like ginkgoes, myself. Great old (and I mean OLD) tree. So far back on the evolutionary chart they don't even have rings.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 02:55 PM

Once more with cookie reset...

That's what Robinson suspects happened to an Iowa City tree after decades without problems.

I think this happened because we legalized gay marriage in Iowa. I tell you it is just pandemonium around here these days.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: MMario
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 03:27 PM

no rings.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 03:41 PM

When I was a college student in Iowa City there were regular complaints about the Ginkgo trees and the smell the seeds gave off. It never bothered me.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 04:01 PM

Look, you just can't TRUST trees. Do YOU take off YOUR clothes and stand around naked in the winter? Of course not, but trees do -- and those that don't are covered with sticky needles instead of being clothed in nudity-hiding leaves like God intended. Trees provide shelter for terrorist birds, who swoop down and poop on your car or head. And that doesn't even BEGIN to touch on trees that suddenly burst into flame and burn millions of square miles or deliberately fall on your house or car or great-grandchild when they are out gamboling innocently in their sandbox.

Cut 'em all down, I say! Let's show 'em who the boss of this planet is once and for all! Nuke the oaks!

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: gnu
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 04:09 PM

The trees here have gone all sorts of odd colours... reds, yellows and all shades in between. Some even red and yellow! Trees are suppose to be green. Is this a statement?

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 04:21 PM

Obviously. Trees do this gaudy get-up just before they start their filthy, disgusting, pornographic, lewd. obscene, lecherous, and just plain old dirty nudee show. Very soon now they'll be swaying their naked bodies and limbs in the wind, exposing themselves to everyone, and using the excuse of being plants to get away with this filth!

Paul Bunyan Was Right!

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 04:48 PM

Rapaire, your prose is giving me a woody.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Tangledwood
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 05:54 PM

The trees here have gone all sorts of odd colours... reds, yellows and all shades in between. Some even red and yellow! Trees are suppose to be green. Is this a statement?

There's your proof - they're flying the rainbow flag.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 06:02 PM

There's an article in the October, 2009 Martha Stewart Living about Ginkgos. 200 millions years old, they say. T-Rex could have chewed it's initials into a few that are now fossils.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: gnu
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 06:18 PM

Maybe it was their droppings that snuffed out the dinosaurs?

Kill em all.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Joybell
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:17 PM

It's as well to be warned of such behaviour. No way I'll be visiting there now that I know.
Mind you -- I have several MALE SHEoaks right here. They keep their clothes on and they dress in dull green. Except, oh my!! I forgot!! In Spring they wear gold tassels and swing them around in the wind! Should I worry?
Cheers, Joy

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:20 PM

Yes. I'd try to put curtains or something around them so that children are protected from such unseemly behavior.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: GUEST,Brian the snail
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 06:08 AM

Plane trees are not gay.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: artbrooks
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 09:24 AM

Ginkgoes don't have rings?!   Well clearly, legalization of gay marriage or not, they are all living in sin and deserve anything they get!

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: frogprince
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 09:53 AM

How come Akeneton hasn't chimed in on this?

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Bill D
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 10:59 AM

Do annual rings indicate 'serial monocots'?

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: gnu
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 11:16 AM

And if the have anal rings, well, that clenches it.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Bill D
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 11:31 AM

anal rings? Oh, of course they do!

but, the sad thing is...*sigh*... that there ARE gay trees who are also necrophiliacs.

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: goatfell
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 12:09 PM

how can a plant be homosexual?

Subject: RE: BS: Gay Trees
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 12:29 PM

Christmas trees are quite gay, well at Christmas anyway.

Dave H