BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know

Subject: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 09:55 PM

In an attempt to avoid information overload, I've prepared this short list of things I absolutely do not need to know. Please don't provide the answers as they would just be more mental baggage I'd have to carry around.


1) How to get to Toledo, Ohio.

2) How to tune a sackbut.

4) William Shatner's preferred reading material while taking a dump.

5) Anything at all about Paris Hilton.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 10:03 PM

I bet you don't need driving instructions to Crawford, Texas, either. That's another one to check off the list.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 11:12 PM

I can tell you how William Shatner tunes a sackbut in Toledo, Ohio while taking a dump at the Paris Hilton.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: wysiwyg
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 11:15 PM

Sagbutt, you mean.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 11:17 PM

Yeah, a medieval trombone.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: wysiwyg
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 11:19 PM

And tuned a tad flat.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: wysiwyg
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 11:20 PM

... and where the slide can go down OK but can't quite get... all the way.... back... up.

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: pdq
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 11:36 PM

These are four things I definitely do not need to know:

1) Prince's opinions on the geo-political ramifications from the creation of the State of Israel.

2) Michael Jackson's assessment of the male's responsibility as a role model.

3) Madonna's favorite flavor of douche.

4) Hillary Clinton's opinion on anything.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: GUEST,Hillary Clinton
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 12:02 AM

And these are four I don't need to know:

1. pdq's favorite flavour of ice cream.

2. His sign.

3. His sexual history, meager as it no doubt is.

4. His opinion on anything.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 12:52 AM

BWL might be interested in the price of a pound of spatulas.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Amos
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 01:02 AM

I would like to know what viruses do when they are not busy being viral. And where dust comes from. I'd like to know where the time goes. I'd also like to know how the world keeps getting put back the next morning, and the Key to Good Sleep.

Among other things.


A

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Cluin
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 01:27 AM

Amos,

1. sleep
2. you (more specifically, your body and everybody elses)
3. Orillia, Ontario
4. Faster-Than-Light gremlins
5. liquor

That'll be 25 cents please.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 02:16 AM

How about 5 for a dollar?

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: alanabit
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 02:46 AM

1. What is in fashion this year.
2. Who are the most biggest selling recording artists.
3. Anything at all about Michael Jackson.
4. The facts about anyone's sex life except my own.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 09:09 AM

1. Anything in "People" magazine.
2. Anything in the so-called newspapers sold at supermarket checkouts.
3. Anything about Donald Rumsfeld's or Dicky Cheney's love life.
4. Anything about J Lo, Britney Spears, Bobby Brown, and similar types of people.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Amos
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 09:31 AM

Rapaire, I don't think you have to worry much about number 3 -- it's an oxymoron.

A

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 09:44 AM

I just realized that the list in my original post is labeled 1,2,4,5, omitting #3. That means there are 5 things I don't need to know, not 4, but I can't remember what the third one is.

This is worrisome. I would say it might cause me to lose sleep, but it's morning and I'm wide awake. Perhaps it will cause me to lose wake.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Wesley S
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 10:26 AM

Perhaps you don't need to know what the contents of #3 are.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Amos
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 10:41 AM

BWL, I think what happened is that you and Rapaire experienced a thought-form domain collision, causing him to include your number 3 in his list, and to make it oxymoronic so as to not to have a catastrophic impact on cognitive space-time frameworks. So it is not a problem.


A

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 11:20 AM

1. The address of Donald Trump's barber
2. The chemical composition of Brylcreme
3. What dying feels like
4. What wine goes best with chicken feet

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bill D
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 12:13 PM

the list of things I specifically need to NOT know is large, though limited. The list of things I just don't need to know is infinite.

Thus, I will not begin it.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 12:18 PM

Who, What, Where and Why. That wide enough?

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bill D
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 12:27 PM

what about When & How?

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: pdq
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 12:34 PM

I think When & How are still working. Lounge act, probably down there is Las Vegas. Yep, that's it. Working the cheap spots in Vegas.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: frogprince
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 01:41 PM

1.Pat Robertson's opinion about oral sex. (Unfortunately, I accidentally read it once..)      
2.Pat Robertson's opinion about anything else.
3.How Timothy LeHaye believes the world will end. (As I've noted before, he can kiss my Left Behind.)
4.Who, or what, Paris Hilton is sleeping with.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bill D
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 03:00 PM

"sleeping with"?????

Bubba is being tried for statutory rape:

Judge- "Did you sleep with this girl, Bubba?"
Bubba - "Not a wink, your honor."

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 08:33 PM

Judge: Case Dismissed!

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: nosluap57
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 08:43 PM

1. My brother-in-law's current reason he hates Bush.
2. How many eels it takes to fill a hovercraft.
3. The price of tea in China.
4. Why Harry Potter is so popular.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: John O'L
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 09:26 PM

Pat Robertson has an opinion about oral sex?

I didn't need to know that.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 09:47 PM

Poor man. He will probably go to hell for thinking about oral sex while forming an opinion. I do remember sneaking a peak at a book about sex designed for practicing Catholics. Mom had it hidden in the closet. Oral sex was OK as long as actual ejaculation took place in the vagina. Ejaculation any place else was a sure ticket to hell.

Now...if Pat Robertson is (as I suspect) against oral sex, he will be forced to spend eternity with a whole bunch of Catholics who tried it and didn't move in time. As well as with Bill Clinton who didn't believe it was sex at all.
Ironic!

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: frogprince
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 09:57 PM

Dear brother Pat's opinion was that decent people probably shouldn't do it, since gay people do it a lot. I don't know if he had been watching a lot of gay people, but I'm sure it's true if he says so...

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 10:38 PM

Nah! The reason Pat Robertson is against oral sex is because he thought it meant having sex with Oral Roberts. And Pat would never even consider having sex with Oral. Jimmy Swaggart gives much better blow jobs.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 01:56 AM

Too Much Information!

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Cluin
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 02:06 AM

Too late. It's in there now.
That's the trouble with thinking about things you don't need to know. You end up knowing far more about them than you should.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 05:48 AM

Brain overload! Brain overload!!

Help me!!!!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Amos
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 09:20 AM

Throw the power switch. You don't need the wetware anyway.

A

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 09:44 AM

The UK sea areas in order..

The best way to cook grasshoppers.

Anything in text-speak.

Why bagpipes.

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Amos
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 09:54 AM

1. Who IS the Little Man Behind the Curtain?
2. Do Munchkins "do it"?
3. Can the Tin Man ever have children?
4. Where do people like Dick "Dick" Cheney and George "W" Bush come from?

A

Subject: RE: BS: 4 Things I Don't Need to Know
From: Cluin
Date: 22 Nov 05 - 10:00 AM

Trick questions. They all have the same answer.