BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: Ebbie
Date: 01 Nov 03 - 06:10 PM

I am reminded of an old story that I'm not sure is relevant, but maybe it can be adapted to the present case.

It appears that once on a camping trip in high dry desert country after a late night of imbibing and making merry, the men woke up late the next morning in their sleeping bags and discovered one of their mates sheet-white and wide-eyed with terror. He mouthed silently that there was a rattlesnake inside the sleeping bag with him.

The nonplussed friends proposed various remedies- to grasp the friend under the armpits and drag him out slowly (No, no, no, don't touch me, the friend screamed silently); to shoot the varmint through the sleeping bag where he lay curled up (No,no, no, the friend screamed silently); to get the sledge hammer and with one blow despatch the critter (No, no, no, the friend screamed silently); wait until dark and see if the snake would vacate (No, no, no, get him out, I have to go to the bathroom, the friend, etc)

The morning went by and the sun blazed and the friend begged silently for shade. Moving softly they erected a tarp. The friends were stumped. They sat down under a tree and fell silent. It looked like their friend was doomed.

Then one man got up and going over to the friend he removed the tarp. No, no, no, the friend screamed silently, and then his eyes bulged in terror as he felt the reptile move from his legs. In fascination the men gathered 'round as the huge snake slithered up the length of the man's body and over the man's arm then on to and over his shoulder and past his neck and out upon the ground and headed for the shade.

Does this give anyone any ideas?

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: InOBU
Date: 01 Nov 03 - 06:26 PM

I guess that really is it, M Ted. We see the soldiers who came back and were forgotten, the former teachers and classmates, we see the ones who are pushed out of middle america, where they have porches, and land on our stoops, hungry, cold, often drunk, and as you say, very real, often open people with storries which scream at you, there but for fortune.
Cheers
Larry

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: LadyJean
Date: 01 Nov 03 - 11:47 PM

most of the unfortunates who sleep in doorways in the alley near my house, are sober. I leave food, and the occasional pir of warm socks in those doorways.
This having been said, I am vastly enjoying Bat Goddes's fictitious drunk. Perhaps she might try bagpipe music? I'm told some people don't like bagpipes.

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: Amos
Date: 02 Jan 09 - 11:48 AM

WHo in their right mind would not like bagpipes?


A

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jan 09 - 11:53 AM

Someone hung over?

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 02 Jan 09 - 12:41 PM

aha Amos, I see you're off the nicotine today, too - and you're already back to 2003 in the threads! I feel your pain.

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: Gervase
Date: 02 Jan 09 - 01:16 PM

Grief, I saw this thread and wondered what the heck Micca had done now!

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 03 Jan 09 - 10:56 AM

I understand in Rochester the yoof come outta the pubs in town centre and piss into peoples letter boxes. Remind me not to buy house in town centre.

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: Art Thieme
Date: 03 Jan 09 - 09:34 PM

I would use Velveeta!

Art

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: GUEST,Bat Goddess SS(2003)
Date: 04 Jan 09 - 05:48 AM

Well its been over 5 years since that drunk crept under my porch, funny it seems like yesterday.

He cured the bible bashers - there now all channeling beings from the Pleiades.

He taught me the way of the grape and the hop in exchange for the truths of yeast extract and very rich cheese dishes( a fair exchange)

He no longer sings of the bawdy young lasses from the bowels of the porch - occasionaly when the moon is full.......I join him there


life is beautiful

Bat Goddess SS AKA Patridge xxx

Subject: RE: BS: Getting a drunk out from under the porch
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 04 Jan 09 - 01:48 PM

I must have missed this thread in 2003.

By the way, this thread was not started by me -- Bat Goddess (Linn Schulz in Nottingham, NH, USA), but by...Partridge? Is that you?

Anywho, this thread has nothing to do with porches or drunks in Nottingham, New Hampshire, USA or anything that I (Mudcat Bat Goddess since 1998) has any knowledge about.

Please don't confuse the two identit ies! (Thank you.)

Linn