BS: stay afloat while others don't

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 24 Jul 24 - 07:41 PM

Update on previous post:

the sutures came out two days ago.
There is more scabbing than I expected,
so I am having to go softly and carefully with that part of my head.

The chorus that I sing with during the school year,
just had a board meeting which established that
they have got hardly any money left.
The director is gloomily thinking of austerity measures,
including not hiring an orchestra --
so much for Haydn's The Seasons, in that case.
Donations are drastically down this year.
There is serious talk of grant-writing.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 12 Aug 24 - 05:59 PM

We haven't seen Mrrzy around here for a number of weeks. I hope all is well. Wedding plans, travel, etc.

Keb, are you back to your old self now many weeks after the cyst? And is the estate work moving along?

Senoufou, it must be close to time for you to finally be on the schedule for the surgery. I hope!

Last weekend I emailed a book review to old friends who have lived in West Texas for about 20 years, but who were some of my first friends in the neighborhood when we moved to Fort Worth. We don't talk often, but it is that kind of friendship where you pick up where you left off. Except this time I learned the husband passed away last month of a rare and late to diagnose bile duct cancer. I'm wondering if she will decide to move back to town now, in which case I'll do everything I can to help. She has her hands full with selling some extra property out there, but there are no children or siblings to make her work more difficult. The husband was 67 with a healthy lifestyle and the expectation to live many more years.

What reminders have each of you had lately that we should have our affairs in order?

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 13 Aug 24 - 09:47 AM

Keep healing, keb!

Thanks stilly! Fine, but frantic, indeed. At least the wedding is next month, yay, and my other kid did get long-term committed, yay again.

Beach next week. Then classes start.

Retirement is terrifically busy.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 15 Aug 24 - 11:40 AM

Mrrzy, good to hear how well things are going!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 17 Aug 24 - 10:00 AM

Spoke too soon!

Woken up this morning by frantic call from friend, whose wife (also friend) is suicidal, can I come help. No, I am 6 hours away at the beach.

Next message from friend who is supposed to be my date at my kid's wedding, who may not make it because her sister is dying of pancreatic cancer, to say that SHE now has been diagnosed with a pancreatic insufficiency that might be cancer, they don't know yet.

Well, shit, is all I can say. Am at the beach. Nothing I can do, so I'm going to the beach. With my phone, though.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Aug 24 - 09:05 PM

Mrrzy, it might be best to leave the phone behind while at the beach. Give yourself time to absorb the salt and fresh air without the worry. Do you have a book for summer reading? Breathe deeply. Get the full value of the trip, it will help you work through the rest later, especially if there is nothing you will be able to do about it anyway.

I've been reading about health and diet recently; the amount of diabetes and pancreatic cancer is increasing and it has to do with the Western Diet. There's a lot we can do about that, but it takes research.

Last year I met a woman via a Facebook group and have been able to offer assistance on occasion; the goal is to not interfere or make someone dependent upon me, but to be a friend who can help occasionally. This spring she moved into a high-end building because the housing authority in town has placements with a few subsidized apartments for disabled/Medicaid-eligible people (the builders get a big tax break). She is finding that the mostly rich people in her building throw away a lot of things they should donate, and via bin diving has managed to round up and offer some interesting items on her Buy Nothing group. She is also able to sell some things and help her bottom line a bit. (Do you know how hard it is to get a bank account if your credit rating is low? She finally got a credit union account and is rebuilding that way.)

Yesterday I delivered two hard-case suitcases (rolling) and two sturdy gym bags to a homeless shelter for her. Staying afloat is a challenge, so I'm pleased that she's enjoying the bin diving in her building and with all of the activity is also still helping others. I'm pretty sure that minutes after I dropped off those items four people at the shelter with crumbling bags had a new suitcase or duffle to put their possessions in.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 23 Aug 24 - 03:10 PM

Now, if only we could hear from dear Eliza/Senoufou,
who hasn't been heard from in weeks at least ...
waiting patiently on the waitlist of the NHS
for her gallbladder surgery.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Thompson
Date: 30 Aug 24 - 11:36 AM

Diabetes and its evil allies are also increasing because of obesity, which is increasing not only because of awful diets but because of the accursed private car, in each of which sits one person dying of loneliness and texting and instagramming and tiktoking all alone while driving.
Talking of obesity, for those of use with swollen electricity bills, what's the deal on air fryers? Are they really that much cheaper to cook in than ovens?

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 30 Aug 24 - 02:16 PM

I believe this is a response to The Sandman "Dick" several days ago.
Funnily enough there is a discussion germane to this topic,
but not on this thread --
seek out the DECLUTTER thread instead to see
talk of transportation and of eating habits.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Helen
Date: 30 Aug 24 - 02:33 PM

Thompson, our oven takes at least 20 minutes to pre-heat and a lot longer to cook the food than our versatile oven-style (not basket-style) air fryer. We can use either the air fryer or oven settings on it, and for some foods like roasting vegetables, we use the oven setting and then air fry for a few minutes at the end to brown the veges a bit. We're happy with it and almost all of our food is healthy and nutritious, except for some potato or sweet potato fries now and then. :-D

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Aug 24 - 02:58 PM

I have never fooled with an air fryer but I bought a clean used convection countertop oven I use all of the time. It is so much more efficient than the big oven in the stove when I'm baking something small. (I also use a microwave and have a bowl-and-lid-style convection oven for bigger things like roasted whole chicken or baked vegetables, etc.)

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Thompson
Date: 01 Sep 24 - 06:46 AM

Thanks, lads, both air fryer and convection oven sound great; I shall definitely invest in one when I'm a millionaire.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Helen
Date: 01 Sep 24 - 11:18 AM

I've never been called a lad before. How about you, Stilly? :-D

We struck it lucky. Just as we were about to look for an air fryer a catalogue for a well-known local store landed in our mail box and it offered an air fryer/oven combo for a little over $AU200, reduced from over $AU500. It has been worth the money.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 01 Sep 24 - 01:22 PM

A lot of what ends up in thrift stores are the previous versions of things that people received for holiday gifts, etc. Excellent working crock pots, countertop skillets, toaster ovens, convection cookers, grills, many of these are still the best items to use instead of the new all-in-one devices. Every year at xmas I tell people please don't give me appliances. I like my cast iron skillets and versatile devices. My Mom used to get one-function things to try and they were soon neglected (egg cookers, hot dog cookers, etc.) I found a George Foreman grill for $3 at an estate sale (the plates top and bottom both heat, and the grill is sloped so grease drains, in my case, to a small plate put in front of it.) Fish, beef, pork, chicken, any kinds of meats, but you can also stack on cut vegetables and drizzle olive oil, etc for a great fast meal.

Family and friends know for my fondness of thrift stores so will let me know when they need something. My ex had an expensive and well-used older bread machine in which the bread tin inside had cracked. Could I find another of the tins? I ended up finding a bread machine that had the tin but was missing the rubber gasket and beater bar for kneading (for $20). He ended up putting his gasket and beater in the new tin and started using the much newer machine. Marrying devices like this means less stuff in the landfill and doesn't trigger a sale that indicates a manufacturer should make more.

Modern industrial nations are so wasteful. As a way to run an economy Capitalism can bring out the worst in investors and businesses who make things instead of building the best and fixing them when needed. Planned obsolescence is an obscenity.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Helen
Date: 01 Sep 24 - 03:36 PM

I'm a big fan of op shops (i.e. opportunity shops), and secondhand stores.

I have also been a big fan of cast iron cookware. I bought a large frypan/skillet probably nearly 50 years ago from a camping supplies store and I use it almost every day. I had a large cast iron casserole dish which I used a lot but then I found an enamel version and I use it for slow cooking recipes.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: MaJoC the Filk
Date: 02 Sep 24 - 06:32 AM

> Planned obsolescence is an obscenity.

*Agree*, Stilly. The rot for me set in with the transistor radio, which was *only* *just* repairable with a soldering iron and a bit of native wit .... once everything got merged into single-purpose chips, that were that.

But the repair instinct does have a downside if it isn't shared with one's spouse. I've inherited my father's DIY and hoarding habits, while Herself is a minimalist; we've evolved rigid areas of doubt and uncertainty to minimise conflict.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 04 Sep 24 - 09:04 PM

Yikes. Wedding rehearsal tomorrow! It begins!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 04 Sep 24 - 09:59 PM

Good, Mrrzy! We look forward to your account of how it goes!

A friend I've described before, who is on a housing voucher living in a high-end apartment downtown (the corporation gets a huge tax break when they allow for a percentage of subsidized apartments) continues to amaze us with her account of things she finds in the trash rooms of the building. She is slowly building an income from selling things that people have thrown away; most of it she offers for free to clear the space in her small apartment and to pass on to others who need these things, but the items she can sell help her bottom line. She's a survivor and I am proud of how smart she has been to make this work for her. Dumpster Diving is an art and a science for survivors.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 05 Sep 24 - 03:07 PM

Mrrzy, you're in the home stretch! Keep it up!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 20 Sep 24 - 02:25 PM

Keb, are you fine, is that why this thread took some finding?

Wedding will get its own thread if required. It was grand.

But after the wedding, whew did I crash, emotionally. I knew there would be *a* crash, after trying all year to get one kid into hospital and the other twin successfully married, so I was braced, but woo baby it got really, really bad. Actually it started between the rehearsal and the wedding. It got better, took about a coupla weeks, OK now. Hadn't had that kind of anguishing agonizing desperate hyper-ultra-sadness in absolute decades...

Still trying to figure out what I was so sad *about* - working on that. Some was just the let-down after success in arduous projects with no other projects on the plate, but there was something deeply distressing therein. Which I prefer to think about than feel, being me.

In other news, The not-guilty-by-reason-of-insanity one is about to be transferred to the hospital where he'll be for the foreseeable future, so that is good. They'd been waiting for a bed, paperwork had been done a while back.

And the newlyweds will be back from honeymoon (Sligo for her, Bruges for him) tonight, woot. I got occasonal pix, even! Woot again.

Love you all!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Sep 24 - 09:20 PM

It sounds like you managed to work your way out of that crash fairly promptly, Mrrzy. Good for you!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 21 Sep 24 - 11:15 AM

INdeed, good for you, Mrrzy.
Mental health is such a precarious, even treacherous, area. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I hope you weren't alone and that you had support to call on when your need was greatest.

As for me, my head bump is behaving itself since the surgery; there is still a bump there but it is no longer infected.
I just had two vaccines in three days' time,
the flu shot in one arm and the COVID vaccine in the other.
So now, both arms hurt like heck,
and I feel under the weather.
At least I know it will pass.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 24 Sep 24 - 07:33 PM

Indeed. Good to hear!

Honeymooners back. Luggage is another story.

Still not well but out of despair. Doing things about it, though!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 01 Oct 24 - 09:20 AM

Keb, how are you?

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 01 Oct 24 - 01:27 PM

Keb is fine and celebrating my 67th birthday today,
a birthday I share with the Mudcat itself.
Am especially pleased at how the decluttering and downsizing is going,
having just sold an extra bed frame to a nice family one town over.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 05 Oct 24 - 01:56 PM

Woot! Hippo birdie all around!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Oct 24 - 03:18 PM

We are a month out from the presidential election so my village now allows political signs in yards. I'll be mowing then strategically placing two Harris/Walz signs. I've ordered one for the senate race (against Ted Cruz). It will join the others as soon as it arrives. The next door guy has a Trump banner on his house.

My neighbors across the street have put up Democratic signs in the past, but they've both been unwell and are about 90 now. Not doing so much. So I'll be sure to put my signs so they can enjoy them any time they look out. Staying afloat here and buoying the neighbors.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Doug Chadwick
Date: 06 Oct 24 - 05:04 AM

The thread title continues "...... while others don't". Our US friends will sink or swim together on this one.

The post of 05 Oct 24 - 03:18 PM belongs in the "BS: American Presidential race 2024" thread, not here.

DC

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Helen
Date: 06 Oct 24 - 06:20 AM

Whatever the outcome of the election, some will be floating and others won't and there is a lot riding on that outcome.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Doug Chadwick
Date: 06 Oct 24 - 06:27 AM

That doesn't change the fact that the post belongs elsewhere.

DC

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 06 Oct 24 - 12:07 PM

Doug, it is just fine here. The point is that the neighbors across the street aren't doing so well now, so the signs are a boost to them. You don't have to read between the lines to understand that simple point.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 06 Oct 24 - 12:43 PM

Lots of videos of Western North Carolina and other places where many are having to start over, where "staying afloat" is simply to have stayed alive during Hurricane Helene.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Thompson
Date: 06 Oct 24 - 04:44 PM

Mental health is indeed precarious - most tragically for those cursed with psychotic illnesses. Which makes it particularly excellent (fingers crossed) news to hear that for the first time in 50 years a new medicine for schizophrenia has been launched. It doesn't cause the raging hunger and resulting fat that the current medicines do, or other side effects, though it does have nausea as a nasty side effect. Only available (at US costs) in the US so far: Cobenfy

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 09 Oct 24 - 10:59 AM

Mental health is indeed precarious for we who have mental health conditions- mine took a nosedive recently, but I am being monitored. And drugged, for the 1st time in over 5 yrs. Gabapentin, anyone?

Overreacting to real things. New term: statastrophizing. Using statistics to catastrophize.

It got very bad, though, before I realized how bad it was getting. But as soon as the plastic bag I took off my sunny paper said, you know, you could put me over your head, I called my shrink in.

Better now, on a slow upswing. Not yet well enough to be watching for the overshooting, whee, still just trying to climb out of the hole.

Cooked with knives today, which I'd been unwilling to risk. Tiny cut on fingertip. Thought, serves me right.

So, not well yet. But definitely better.

And someone else is doing all the driving, but that's because I am drugged to the gills on this stuff. Enjoying that part, actually...

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 09 Oct 24 - 03:28 PM

Mrrzy, I'm thankful that you got the help you needed,
and that there is medication that helps now.
Did the bride and groom ever get their luggage back?

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 10 Oct 24 - 12:37 PM

Yes on luggage, only one day late.

And just for fun, broke 3 bones in my foot last night. Whee!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 10 Oct 24 - 01:43 PM

Mrrzy, someone in my Facebook friends recently posted a clever cartoon to which I originally posted a "hahaha" Facebook response but then realized she'd posted it because she had broken a toe in the way described in the cartoon so I felt bad about laughing at the cartoon and changed my response to "wow!" Sometimes things deserve a laugh and tears at the same time. I hope you can sort that out in our responses!

Will you taper the meds at some point to see if they have done the trick and you can proceed without them? Does their making you loopier mean they can be reduced (because they're not as needed?) Understanding how your medicine works is probably as much work as figuring out that you now need it in the first place. Good luck with all of that.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Helen
Date: 10 Oct 24 - 03:04 PM

Mrrzy, I'm hoping that your current issues might be the post-adrenaline physical and mental slump resulting from your recent need to keep on top of family events. Rest and recuperation, pamper yourself, give yourself some time and space to recover and hopefully you will get your equilibrium back. Sending healing thoughts from sunny Oz.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Thompson
Date: 10 Oct 24 - 06:41 PM

Mrrzy, sorry the world is out to get you right now. It will divert its savage attention to some other poor victim when it's had its fun (in my experience).
Meanwhile, I'd recommend (from the first quarter or so) a strangely life-affirming book about a woman who takes her own life - but before dying, finds herself in a library full of regrets, where she can relive all the things in her life that have burdened her with regret, grief, guilt and sorrow. It's called The Midnight Library, and it's as comforting as a warm purring cat on your lap.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 11 Oct 24 - 05:12 PM

EXCELLENT cartoon! Love Strange Planet. I have been to that location, too.

Meds are for a month, said shrink. Don't want to taper yet, at any rate.

The purring cat reminds me of a different Strange Planet cartoon, where the one holding the cat says, It's vibrating, and the other says, That means it's functioning.

A purring cat is definitely functioning.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Oct 24 - 07:54 PM

Several years ago I started following The Oatmeal for the same kind of cartoons. And he has branched out into other products, particularly games and puzzles. My favorite jigsaw puzzles have come from there (and they are a challenge - this is the one set up on my sunroom jigsaw puzzle table now. I fall in love with each one as I work it, but the Great Wave (the parody of the Japanese wave) and the Dog's Nightmare have been favorites so far.

Knowing how to taper is a skill, and knowing when you're ready is also a skill. Good luck sorting them out.

Thompson, that sounds like an interesting book.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 14 Oct 24 - 09:39 PM

Indeed.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 15 Oct 24 - 04:14 PM

How are all of y'all?

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: keberoxu
Date: 15 Oct 24 - 07:37 PM

Today I got a tour of a retirement community, have had this in mind for a while, but haven't got round to it before today.
Looks like a strong candidate for my big lifestyle change.
I got a whole folder of paperwork and literature and stuff.
So many problems would be solved by taking this step. It's still a big one.
But this visit today left me feeling hopeful.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 16 Oct 24 - 08:53 AM

Well, good!

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Oct 24 - 12:18 PM

Police rescue injured man from tracks seconds before an oncoming train - a better story of police work than so many we see these days. Hopefully Harborview has a good psych ward to help him also.

I have a pooch in a t-shirt this week after a small surgery to remove a small fat mass from her side. Two years ago I didn't act quickly enough when she developed a similar mass that turned out to be mastitis - and that got bad when it finally blew up - so I promised myself I wouldn't let something like that go for too long. And the t-shirt means she doesn't have to wear the cone of shame, for which we are all truly grateful.

Small donation made to a former coworker's cause on Facebook - trying to offer moral support to what is apparently an issue in her family. Just in general trying to stay on top of things and help others feel better.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 18 Oct 24 - 10:40 AM

Dig it.

Am slooowly climbing out of my Slough of Despair. Tried to titrate down the gab(apentin), too soon. But I drfinitely feel better.

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Oct 24 - 10:49 AM

What does Gabapentin do for you? It sounds like a moving target as far as the off-label uses it is prescribed for. The top answer I see when I Google it (without AI) is that it is prescribed for epilepsy, but then I hear about all sorts of other uses. The [new] vet tried to send some home for my dog a couple of weeks ago (we declined, she wasn't in the pain he thought she might be.)

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 20 Oct 24 - 11:14 AM

It keeps my mental hamster, Fortesqueue, off his tiny yet invasive wheel. Does a good job but I feel too drugged to drive. Luckily I can't drive right now because of my foot, so yay, driver.

Going to visit son in his psych hospita later today. That is never relaxing, but at least he's in the not-max-security place now, so I can bring him food, and pj pants...

Subject: RE: BS: stay afloat while others don't
From: Mrrzy
Date: 22 Oct 24 - 09:15 AM

Lovely visit. Excellent deep philosophical discussion of free will v determinism. I have missed those!

Meanwhile I have finally turned a corner where I can take 1 gab in the morning and one at night, without having to add one in the middle of the day, yay. And the foot is almost ready to drive, so we are converging nicely.

How are y'all?