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BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to...
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: gnu Date: 24 Oct 10 - 07:24 PM I am fish breath here. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 24 Oct 10 - 07:26 PM Whew, glad you owned up to it, gn-ze... I thought it was me... Just brushed my teeth twice... I'm workin' my courage up, folks... Maybe P.B. will come along and help here... The next chapter ain't all that easy... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Rapparee Date: 24 Oct 10 - 07:33 PM Dammit, I told you and told you to take bail money! |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 24 Oct 10 - 07:40 PM Prelude to the rest of the story: Back a long time ago our dad had a hair brush that he'd had going back a long, long time and then one day P.B. decided that, as a prank, he'd shave the bristles off the hair brush so that it was then just a, ahhhhhh, mere block of wood with a little stuble... So my dad got real steamed and, ya' see, P.B. got to him 1st and blamed me fir havin' done this dastardly deed to my P.F.s (poor father) hair brush and, well, seein' as I didn't do it I denied have doen the deed but P.B. insisted I did and, hey, seein' as I knew I didn't do it that only left P.B. on the list of suspicious characters and holiday family suppers after that were never the same as P.F. would try to get one of us to 'fess up and then the finger pointin' would be begin... Well, this story don't make alot of sense right now but as I try to untangle Part B of the story, it will... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 24 Oct 10 - 07:41 PM Yeah, Rap... And thanks fir the advice... Later... |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Janie Date: 24 Oct 10 - 08:00 PM And then? And THEN.....? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 24 Oct 10 - 08:16 PM I'm sorry, ya'll... I'm jus' too worn out from the last couple days and need the safety of my own bed and try to do an accurate recollection inventory in order to go on... I think that make require a good night's sleep... Maybe P.B., who I told about this joint, will come along and give his take on it... Maybe not... No matter... Ol' Bobert needs beer and sleep... Maybe just beer... Nah, sleep... Nah, beer... Nah, sleep... Nah.... Tomorrow, ya'll... Sorry... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bill D Date: 24 Oct 10 - 08:21 PM back from a craft show and ....waiting with |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Rapparee Date: 24 Oct 10 - 09:05 PM This is actual footage of Bobert & Bro. sailing...Bobert his own self did the commentary and stuff. They don't call him "Fast Fingers" fer nothin'. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: maeve Date: 25 Oct 10 - 05:42 AM The rest of the story, Part I |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 08:12 AM *****Now fir the rest of the story***** Seems we were just past the half way mark and had succesfully negotiated some narrow channels with all 47 feet of P.B.'s 1970 Cris Craft and were headed purdy much into the north end of the bay with our destination on the other side... I had been the wheel-man fir the last hour or so and holding a 260 compass reading purdy well when it was time to make that last calculation and come up with a new heading to hit our target on the other side of the bay... P.B. had the chart open and was using the official Wes Ginny instrument (a 12 inch long plastic wire bundlin' strap) on the chart as a straight edge to figure the new heading... I was kinda holdin' the wheel with my left leg while lookin' at the chart with him when, without notice, the port side engine died!!! O-oh... Hmmmmmm? And all that... Now ya'll remember the "hair brush story"... Well, this is the new version as P.B. said I must have backed into the dash an accidently flipped the breaker which would have killed it... Well, the dash is resessed a couple inches so that unless ya' gotta a bigass tumor stickin' outt yer back or you grew a hand outta it that it's not all the possible but... Now that port side engine was the one with the dragging starter motor that morning and one a starter motor gets it in it's little starter motor mind to slack then that about all it's ever gonna do again so the repeated attempts to refire the engine were futile so.... Here P.B. and poor ol' hillbilly were just figuring our heading to cross the bay with one losuy engine trying to push 47 feet of 40 year old boat... Ya'll with me so far??? Good... |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 08:28 AM ...and as luck would have it we were a tad south of where we wanted to be in an area where there are a half a million crab pots, each with their own float and rope push wanting to twist itself around a the propeller of any mean ol' boat that ran them over... Now when ya' loose and engine that means you also loose half yer speed and the boat kinda wants to pull toward the lost engine side and we were heading into the upper bay where the seas were alot higher and wind purdy steady off the port side so our new reality (at least for that moment) was dodging crab pots while trying to hold a compass heading with wind and seas battering the port side of the boat!!! That meant that if we saw a crab pot at 1:00 that we had to swing to the port side an extra 50 or so feet in order to not let the seas and wind push us up into it... To make things worse we were headed directly into the sun and the reflections on the water made it a full time job fir both of us to find the sumabichin' crab pots... P.B. has a better knack for findin' 'um so I manned the wheel while he called out 2:00, 11:00, dead ahead fir what seemed an eternity before we had cleared the last of the evil things... We were now in the open bay with seas and wind pushing the port side and I had to call the P-Vine and at least tell her that we were alive but the only place where it was quiet enuff was up in the bow so I carefully made it up there, called her and as I was telling here about our situation I was lookin' out the port and with all that was going on with the boat I'd be lookin' down at sea and 10 seconds later looking staright up at the sky... Now that's what I call fun... There's one thing about a 47 foot boat chuggin' at 5 knots accross the bay that was probably in both our heads... No, actually more than one thing... But the one that came to my mind, other than prayin' not to loose a seconf engine, was that it looks like a wounded duck to any, ahhhhhhh, police boat... I mean, worse than a red Camaro doing 90 on the interstate??? But... |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 08:43 AM ...chug we did... We could see the other side of the bay and P.B. had his binocualrs out trying to get a fix on where we were... Ain't no bouys out there to speak of as we were crossing a shipping channel... Fortunately the only bigass boat crossed behind us by at least a a half a mile as we crossed it... At one point, P.B. mad his way out to the bow for a clearer look than thru the glare and dirt of the windsield during which time I was planning what I'd have to do if he went overboard in the seas... But P.B. made it back with no real news other than just keep trustin' the compass and the "It's been 3 years since I've siled into ____________... Now folks, 5 miles on a clear day makes the shore look like yer almost there but with one engine running and the sun strating on its way down, ol' hillbilly was workin the Wes Ginny Slide Rule purdy hard as we limped along toward who-know-where??? It took a good hour before we close enough to what P.B. thought was our destination for the binoculars to do any good and then he says, "Hey, that's not ___________... I 'm not sure what it is but it's not ____________... "Do you see boats in there, Brother???" "Yeah, but it's not __________..." "Well, Brother, that's where we goin' no matter... I don't care if the police station"... I think we were in agreement that on that matter... So chug we did toward an unknown harbor... We were about 1/2 mile out when Brother again said, "No this ain't ____________..." but by now there was no other choice so.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Ebbie Date: 25 Oct 10 - 08:57 AM Don't stop NOW! |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 08:58 AM ... there were a number of other boats entering the harbor so we just kinda got in line like planes waiting to land and limped toward the inlet... Then P.B. says, "Yeah, this is __________..."... "They've put up a new sea wall which threw me off..." I believe that was the first time in about 3 hours where this ol' hillbilly actually thought that, "Hey, we just might pull this thing off..." as we made it past the last green channel marker on the starboard side of P.B. crippled Cris Craft... Now, P. B. hadn't quite gotten around to making any arrangements with anyone for a place to stash his boat but found a marina that had done some work on it in the past that had one space left and after a little negotiating with some of the folks there and pushing a pulling another boat around snugged her up in the "no docking" zone where waste is pumped, shut down the poor starboard engine and gave out one collective sigh of emmense relief... The marina was a good 1/4 mile from where I had left my Toyota truck so I hoofed it back to get it all the while sayin' "Thank you, Lord" over and over and over... On the trip back to _____________ to get P.B. car I commented that "the Lord looks after fools, drunks and kids..." P.B. finshed it with, "Yeah, and we had lotta coverage..." That's my stroy and unlrss P.B. comes here and adds anything that I left out, I reckon I'll stick with it... Bobert |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: gnu Date: 25 Oct 10 - 10:32 AM WHEW! |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Rapparee Date: 25 Oct 10 - 10:36 AM You call THAT a tale of the open sea? No pirates, no blockade runners, no submarines, no crashing onto an uncharted reef and having to survive for five years on empty clam shells and saltwater? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 11:14 AM It's the best that P.B. could do, Rap... I mean, no registration, no survey, no insurance, posssible impoundment, dodgin' crab pots and sailboats, wind, rough seas, one lousy engine, two alternators down, confused navigator, no radio, no GPS, one compass and two knotheads (us)... Oh, didn't even mention bustin' an antenna going under a low bridge... I mean, "we were takin' the back way so we wouldn't get weighed".... Heck another foot of boat and we would have taken the top off the boat... Sorry, we'll do better next time... BTW, fir those of ya'llz who may not under stand why I have purpsely been vague about where we left from and were headed if you reread the 1st paragraph of this post, there are some clues... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 11:18 AM Ahhhhhh, not to mention that there is al least one little weisel here in the Catbox who would narc out on me in a heartbeat if it thought that it would get me or P.B. busted... Down the road when the boat is safely out of the water for winter I'll fill in the blanks if anyone wants to Google up the charts to see the route we had to take which was a tad on the tricky side for a legal boat... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: maeve Date: 25 Oct 10 - 12:00 PM You had an adventure and you're home safe with P-Vine. What else matters? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Amos Date: 25 Oct 10 - 12:34 PM Hell, I yam proud of your survival instincts, pal. Glad you made it without any fires. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 12:47 PM Yeah, Amos... We thought about fire, too... Lifted the engine cover a couple time to see if the one workin' alternator was excessively hot but it seemed fine... Of course, the closer we got to the end of the sail from Hell P.B. was lighting one cigarette after another... That was 'nuff fire fir me and when we made it into the harbor where the sea were calm I stood on the port side rail to get some fresh air... But no other fires... Shoot, not too much to burn as we had every breaker "off" in the panel except the one to the fuel solonoids for the engines... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Ebbie Date: 25 Oct 10 - 12:58 PM "...survive for five years on empty clam shells and saltwater? " Skimpy fare indeed. Reminds me of what a prospector in early Juneau (1880) said about their having stayed over winter that first year: We had nothing much to eat but snowballs and pepper. Spending a day with one's heart in one's mouth, Bobert, is not a good meal either. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Noreen Date: 25 Oct 10 - 03:03 PM phew! Glad you're safe :) |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 25 Oct 10 - 05:04 PM Hey, ya'll... I was expecting purdy much what we got... I been involved with l9ots of P.B.s adventures over the years and I'd rate this about average... I couldn't live like this on a daily basis but he seems to thrive on livin' on the ragged edge... Me??? I do it just to remind me that inspiye of all the things I put myself thru at least I ain't my P.B.... But glad fir ya'lls "phews" and support... Maybe P.B. will stop in and ya' can give him a few... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: GUEST,Boberts-PB Date: 26 Oct 10 - 12:16 AM I have read what my bro has professed and have taken in your kind V regards...Please allow me to correct a few facts before subsiquent commontary...As to the capper of the shaved hair brush only a guilty man would still try and sell his inocents...you can figure that one out easily...I am very factual and being accused of stalling an OLD Cessna @ 7500 feet only to recover @ 300 feet it proposturiuos,it was not "OLD" Cessna, shame on my brother for such a story...Now as far as the "Poor Brother" tag he has named me I need to let you know that I spoke with my accountant this morning and he said I have done very well ,in fact I have enough money to last me for the rest of my life,you see,he also said as long as I die next wednesday. So there,I am a man of wealth,who's poor now? About the luxury cruise my brother was invited to participate in. True,there were a few minor details that were not just perfect, however my elustriuos crew just happened to vacationing this past weekend in lake wobeecon so I was short few hands,mostly my right and left. Yes the port engine shut down due to someones lack of care of the master switch,sounds like another 50 years of the hair brush. AS a worthy sea captain I always feel that I should impart a little knowledge as I go, so I thought it bes to add a little suspense to the journey,maybe that ignition switch had something to do with that? However,Bobster clearly did that...In his naritive he questions my abilities of navigation,well I can tell you that I have gone to the bathroom back to the bedroom almost everytime without the aid of my GPS or my charts,that should tell you something... After reading the the story of my Grand vessel you may have a desire to purchase it,I must tell you it definit;y not for sale,unless you have lots cash or documents from an institusion,in that case we can talk...NOW about my Bro, Most of you only know him hru his words, I am very lucky to his PB, I may have experienced "Ragged Edge" times but I am very grateful to be his brother.By the way ask Bobert about the time the half a dozen VA State troopers pulled him over for 158MPH in a 45 speed zone in the AC Cobra one night!!! You all are great.............. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 26 Oct 10 - 08:54 AM Well, first of all, I doubt that it was 158MPH... Last I looked before Smokey clocked me was closer to a buck thirty five 'er six... No more that 140 so I don't understand what the fuzz fuss was all about??? And I will attest to P.B. superior navigational skills... We stayed in a motel in ___________ Sunday night I didn't see any pea stains on the carpet in the morning so I can safely assume he found the bathroom without a GPS... Still kinda wonderin' why the boat ain't got one but, hey, I'm just the 1st mate??? Now, as fir buying my P.B.'s boat??? Anyone out there in Mudville who is looking fir a bargain basement special this is boat is it... And should you buy it P.B. and I will be more than willing to offer *advice* on how to get it up the steps 'cause you ain't dealin' with no yahoos here... As fir the Cezna??? I didn't know the new ones came with the faded paint and ripped upohlstry option... My mistake... Lastly, the hair brush and the breaker to the port side engine??? Did I tell ya' that P.B. is Betty Ford graduate??? Yeah, part of deal, however, are those little weekend tune-ups that Betty likes her folks to attend from time to time... P.B. has missed the last 17 of them???? Oh well, he's a good ol' boy anyway but I wouldn't buy a used car from him... (But Boberdz... Ain't you in the midst of buyin' a used box truck from him???) Nevrmind... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Noreen Date: 26 Oct 10 - 06:22 PM *grin* |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: gnu Date: 26 Oct 10 - 07:49 PM Hmmmmm.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: frogprince Date: 26 Oct 10 - 08:03 PM two brothers who are both a bit lexdisic?? An imaginary brother?? Like gnu said, "Hmmmm". |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 26 Oct 10 - 08:06 PM What, gn-ze??? Ya' thought that I din't really have a brother??? Well, don't expect him to come back around unless you ask him questions which, ahhhhhh, ol' hillbilly might find embarassin'... No, actually, when it comes to embarrassin', I think I have shown over the years here that I am perfectly able to handle that without outside help... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 26 Oct 10 - 08:43 PM Ummmm, fir anyone who thinks that me and P.B. are the same, PM Joe O and ask him if the isps is the same... Nah... P.B. is P.B and Bobert is Bobert and never the twix shall twain... But, yeah... I didn't realize that P.B. had the lexdexia... No wonder he had to use some pics he had of a couple of his teachers, you know, the ones with the farm animals, to get thru high school... Plus, P.B. tends to lean to the right a little... Okay, maybe not far right but he likes his Repubs... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Tannywheeler Date: 26 Oct 10 - 09:06 PM Ah, a true tale of adventure & derring-do told by him what lived it...excitement abounds, hair curls, blood chills,...boy that beer's cold...2 guys in a semi-intact floating crapshoot & they lived thru it!!!!! A pair of bros with a long-running got-me-in-trouble-with-dad feud & nobody got murdered!!!! And people say there is no God!!!!! Good job. Tw |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 26 Oct 10 - 10:00 PM Well, thankee, T-wheeler... There are those here who think that rather than two brothers there is just one: me?!?!?... Hey, they say that fact is stranger than fiction and I'm here to say that is true... No one could make up P.B.... And I swear that on my grandmother's Bible... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Rapparee Date: 27 Oct 10 - 10:02 AM The more I read, the more I thought that Bobert's bro should meet my two bros. Then I realized that the world ain't ready for that yet, and perhaps never will be. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 27 Oct 10 - 12:43 PM Heck, rap... They may allready know one another... P.B. does get around with his various, shall I say, ahhhhhh, interests... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Richard Bridge Date: 27 Oct 10 - 01:07 PM I just thought I'd look it up. The official top speed of the 7 litre Cobra was 160mph. AC are now building them again - £150,000 each and not road legal! |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 27 Oct 10 - 01:56 PM The Cobra I raced for Ford Motor Company back in the 60's was the 289 cu.in./271 horsepower aluminum car weighing in at around 1800 pounds... Car & Driver's test driver clocked mid 12 second quarter mile runs but I guess they weren't tryin' too hard 'cause got into the high 11s with it at 112-115 mph... Not too shabby fir the tallish (350ish) rear ratio... I reckon a 411 rear would have gotten it into the high 10s, low 11s... Not too sure what the top speed was... I think I mighta touched 140 or so a couple times on the John Cabot Bridge between Maryland and Virginia which was long and straight... BTW, the 289/271 original Cobras are now at least a quaretr million $$$ but the replica cars are $30,000 to $35,000... They are fiber glass and built on Mustang frames... There are lots of them out there... What ain't out there are the 427 AC Cobras... I think there were only about 50 made and if one could find the right combination of rubber (tires) I'm sure those cars will run well over 200 mph but, then agin, why??? I mean, an origina 427 Cobra is worth half a million $$$ so why would anyone want to takle a chance with that kinda investment??? B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: gnu Date: 27 Oct 10 - 02:14 PM "...why would anyone want to takle a chance with that kinda investment???" No guts, no glory? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 27 Oct 10 - 02:29 PM LOL, gn-ze... Yeah, I reckon if you had a half million $$$ to shread then, hey, why not... BTW, Richrad... The original 427 "Corvette Killers" had to run factory rears and tires/wheels were very limited compared to todays... So, yeah, I'm sure that the 4-2-7s were 175 mph machines back then... So when I talk of 200 plus that with 340 or so rear and taller rubber and not-stock wheel offsets and some suspension stiffin' to keep the rubber outta the body... BTW, Part B... The 289 Cobra I raced was also a "Corvette Killer" in the quarter mile... The Vette's couldn't touch it... We did best-out-of-5 exhibition races at various drag strips against the local top Vette and it went to a 4th run... B~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Rapparee Date: 27 Oct 10 - 03:14 PM Ha! Bobert, that's all kids stuff! WE ran a 1959 Simca and man, didn't we win races! There wasn't a turtle that could beat us, and I mean that! We could get it up to 40 easy, downhill with a tail wind, if the hill was steep enough and long enough. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 27 Oct 10 - 04:02 PM Should have put a 2nd Briggs and Stratton in it, Rap!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: gnu Date: 27 Oct 10 - 04:19 PM Yer fancy racin cars ain't fer this good ol boy. Give me my old yella bug. It was fun on a winding road on accounta it was a challege to ramp it up go tight asshole. Or go where today's yuppies wouldn't take their fancy SUVs. Or go around during snowstorms helping people get their wheels unstuck. Or put er sideways and go through the bollards and slide sideways down the slope to the football field at uni on wet grass and... oops. Oh yeah.... bro had a 66 Bug decked... Abarth mufflers, radial tires (not heard of around here when he brought it home from Germany), Porche engine... even a map reading infrared light from a CF104 Starfighter. It had a paint job with "Der Fleidermouse Rie" on it (The Red bat). Germans on the Autobahn used to chase him and ask him... Vas ist das engine? He also had one which he shaved 12 pounds off the flywheel... I dunno much about weehicles but his stories were good... especially the second time he was in court for killing a famer's pig with his BMW motorpickle. (Same farmer, same judge... not good.) Sorry for the rambling and thread drift. Just stuff that came to mind. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No guts, no glory... Bobert to... From: Bobert Date: 27 Oct 10 - 04:35 PM Man, I am a VeeDub kinda guy myself, gn-ze... Back in the 70's we had some friends who had an ol' bug on their farm... They had taken all the windows outta it, stuck a cheapie roll bar in it and a plastic seat with a nice harness and took turns flippin' it out in this pasture... Yeah, they were potheads... But great fun... B~ |
