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Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-Apr 29, 2011
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2 From: M.Ted Date: 05 May 09 - 12:02 PM Your mother drove herself to the hospital after a stroke? That should tell you something right there! I am torn between giving you cheerful, if somewhat vague encouragement, peppered with good humor and camaraderie, and writing you an instruction manual--I guess I'll settle for giving you a little advice-- First, get an Edirol R-09 digital recorder, if you haven't got one already, and make a habit of recording every conversation with doctors and nurses. Then load everything onto an iPod and listen to it, taking notes and stopping periodically to think. This is important, because they communicate everything verbally, and bright as you are, you'll miss about half of what is said, forget most of the rest of it if you don't. Next is to look up stroke, and, particularly, stroke rehab, up on the internet, and read everything you can. It will help you to understand what the drs are telling you, and not telling you, and it will help you to consider options for dealing with a variety of possible situations--strokes are a bit like snowflakes, in that they are all different-- Beyond that, there is no standard procedure for recovery--there are a variety of things that may or may not present themselves, and you deal with them as the appear. Last, you have to have to take care of yourself--there are drs, nurses, therapists, and many others whose job is to take care of your mom--no one will be provided to deal with the effects that this has on you-- I am very sorry that this all has happened and I wish you, your mom, and your family the best in dealing with it. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Dan Schatz Date: 05 May 09 - 11:53 AM Words fail. Mick you've been through so much already - and you keep singing, in voice and spirit, through your hard times. It's a long hard process, but I know you will be there with your Mom, just as you have for Ciara, and your Dad, and everyone. Be there for yourself, too. Dan |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: ranger1 Date: 05 May 09 - 11:18 AM (((((Mick))))) |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Nancy King Date: 05 May 09 - 11:14 AM Love and good wishes to you and your family, Mick! I know it's hard, but you have a whole lot of folks out here pulling for you. Nancy |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: catspaw49 Date: 05 May 09 - 11:14 AM I dunno' what to say to you Mick......You know I send all the best. I'd love to say I understood why this stuff happens or why it sometimes comes in bunches, but I have no idea. I can't really know how you feel but I may have some empathy....... When I turned 16, I was more excited to get my license than upset that my Mom was going into the hospital for a "few tests" that same day. I was a kid with parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles. By the time I turned 26 they were all, all of them, gone, and I was a long ways past the kid of 16. Over the years since, especially in the last 10 or so when friends like you are losing their older family members, I wonder if I was blessed or cursed to have it happen so young. I think in many ways blessed............. I should have comforting words, I should have some kind of truths to give you........I have none. I should have ways to cope and I should have helpful ideas for how to assuage the pain you feel.....I have none of these either. The best I have are warm thoughts for you and the belief of the importance of family in our lives......but you already knew that. Hang in................ Pat |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: VirginiaTam Date: 05 May 09 - 11:09 AM These are meagre words Mick, and I apologise, wishing healing and blessing for you and your loved ones. Tam |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: jacqui.c Date: 05 May 09 - 10:59 AM Oh my dear! You have such broad shoulders, but even that doesn't mean you have to take so much. Remember, we are here and keeping you and yours in our thoughts. Strangely, I saw an article in the supplement of the Sunday paper, which I rarely read, about the efficacy of Tai Chi for stroke patients. I found this article on line. Don't know if it will help your mother, but thought you ought to see it. Take care melove. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: KT Date: 05 May 09 - 10:39 AM Dear Mick, that's a lot to hold. Please take good care of yourself, too. You and your family are in my prayers. There IS a song in your heart - bring it to your lips and let it out, if you can. It'll help you through, a bit, and wouldn't hurt your mom, either. love to you and yours - KT |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: GUEST,pattyClink Date: 05 May 09 - 10:31 AM Well geez Mick, what can we say? Just consider yourself surrounded by a lot of friends giving you virtual hugs. Here goes with the gratuitous advice: don't let the doctors rule her 'not a candidate' for aggressive rehab on account of age. People can and do recover very well from even major strokes, it's not like when we were kids. I do know the cruelty of what's going on right now. My dear storytelling dad lost his voice to surgery several years before he died, that was an silencing of a great voice but not the man. He furiously communicated with eyes, pen, and legal pad regardless. Wish to God he had been around during this amazing age of texting and email. But hopefully your mom's speech will come back though it may be a slow process. Anyway, hugs from everybody on the Cat. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Ebbie Date: 05 May 09 - 10:27 AM {{{{{{{{{{{{{{Mick}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: frogprince Date: 05 May 09 - 10:18 AM You and yours are on the list of those I'll have in heart, Mick. My family "got off easy" in that both my parents pretty much got along active and independently until right up when their time came. Dean |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: katlaughing Date: 05 May 09 - 10:17 AM And you're nowhere near your quota yet. Not even in the same zip code. Just don't forget to take care of yourself during this troubled time. Amen to that! Mickdarlin', I am bringing all of my imagination to bear on *seeing* your mum up and outta there, shooting spitballs and listening with a big smile on her face to YOU singing to her. When Morgan comes over today, we will go in our sanctums, together, fire up the incense and candles and he will say a blessing for you all, relating it to "Mick, my friend, who sings Billy O'Shea." Sing to your mum, even if it's hard to do and may be soft and low...it will be good for her to hear you and good for you. Use the energy we all send, concentrated within your heart and bring forth the love and good you have always so willingly shared and give it to yourself, first, so that you may continue strong and sure of healing for all. I have worked with stroke patients, in the past, a long time ago. There have been so many advancements since then. I saw what seemed like miracles then; I am sure your mum will come through this well and good and able...with patience and love. I give thanks that she is healed and well. I give thanks for this or something better for the highest good of all concerned. So mote it be! luvyakat |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: SINSULL Date: 05 May 09 - 10:14 AM Mick, When Alice the Cat moans piteously about how tough her life is I tell her "Life sucks and then you die". We both know that it's not true. But sometimes it is OK to wallow in the sentiment...for a while. Your Mom will come through this. So will you. Stay strong for her. And take one day and one step at a time. Love, Mary |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Seamus Kennedy Date: 05 May 09 - 10:09 AM Mick - your mom is gonna need to recover and rehab in order to shoot spitballs again, so let's encourage her all we can. I can hear her now: "Doctor, will I ever shoot spitballs again?" "No, Ma'am, but you'll be able to play the piano." Please give her my best wishes. And take care of yourself. Seamus |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Alice Date: 05 May 09 - 10:07 AM I'm sorry to hear you are going through this Mick. I had a period of 3 years when 10 close relatives died and I almost died myself. One becomes numb and just puts one foot ahead of the other to keep going through it. Take care, big friend. Alice |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Leadfingers Date: 05 May 09 - 10:05 AM Repeat As Above ! Otherwise . words fail me mate ! |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2 From: sharyn Date: 05 May 09 - 10:03 AM Mick, I am sorry. Thinking of you and your mother. Sharyn |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Maryrrf Date: 05 May 09 - 10:00 AM Oh no, Mick. I am so sorry to hear this. You and your family have had more than your share of trouble. May god be with you and yours to help you to get through this. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2 From: Sandra in Sydney Date: 05 May 09 - 09:58 AM hugs & best wishes to you & your family love from sandra |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Keith A of Hertford Date: 05 May 09 - 09:55 AM So sorry to hear you are suffering more even trials. Very best wishes and hopes that you find the strength to endure. keith. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: gnu Date: 05 May 09 - 09:54 AM Thoughts and prayers. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Morticia Date: 05 May 09 - 09:47 AM It really has been your turn in the barrel these last few years hasn't it, my friend? As many have said before and will after me, there is no quota on love and friendship and you have as much of mine as you want for as long as you want. We can sing for you for a while, we know we will hear your voice again when you less beset with fortune's gales. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Dave Swan Date: 05 May 09 - 09:44 AM Hugs, old pal. It's a lot on your plate, but no more than you can handle. You're tough, strong and kind. I wish I could provide an hour's respite, a song and a beer. All best from here. D |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: olddude Date: 05 May 09 - 09:38 AM My prayers, right at you Mick, sometime we just wonder when it will all stop and settle down again. I been there many times and I know how much it hurts. Your friends are here - anything we can do you know just ask .. in the meantime my prayers are right at you Dan |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Waddon Pete Date: 05 May 09 - 09:38 AM Hello Mick, I'm thinking of you at this time. It would be so easy to trot out a series of platitudes at a time like this. Just know that you are held in the hearts of a community that loves and respects you. If you can't sing the songs, then we'll sing them with you. Best wishes, Peter |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2 From: Azizi Date: 05 May 09 - 09:08 AM Mick, I'm sending positive healing vibrations to your mom. She sounds like a wonderful person and she raised you well. You deserve some good times. I hope things get better soon. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: George Papavgeris Date: 05 May 09 - 09:03 AM Mick, my thoughts and prayers with you and those you love. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: JedMarum Date: 05 May 09 - 09:02 AM So sorry to hear about your Mom, Mick. May she recover well and teach the second part of that spit ball class soon! |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Wesley S Date: 05 May 09 - 09:00 AM Plenty of support, prayers, and good thoughts coming your way from myself and all of your other friends here. And you're nowhere near your quota yet. Not even in the same zip code. Just don't forget to take care of yourself during this troubled time. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Catherine Jayne Date: 05 May 09 - 08:58 AM Sorry to hear about your mum Mick. We hold you and your family in our thoughts Khatt and Paul x |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2 From: Stu Date: 05 May 09 - 08:55 AM Sorry to hear about your Mum Mick, on top of all of your other trials. Years ago my Mum used to work with Stroke patients here in the UK as a volunteer organiser for the Chest, Heart and Stroke Association. I tried to see if there was a US version, but had no luck. These people can provide help and support to patients and families, and are worth looking up. All the best, Stu |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Janie Date: 05 May 09 - 08:45 AM There are no quotas on care and concern, Dear One. Sometimes it is one storm after another. Feel yourself surrounded by light and love and what comfort we here can offer. Thoughts and prayers for your mother and may she recover well from her stroke. Janie |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-May 5, 2009 From: Micca Date: 05 May 09 - 08:42 AM Mick, I will light a candle for you and your family, May The lady shine on you and yours Micca |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Big Mick Date: 05 May 09 - 08:36 AM Well ..... the test continues. Here we are some nine months on after Dad's burst abdominal aortic aneurysm, he still isn't out of the hospital, but is due to be released in a few weeks. Ciara continues to deal with her accident, and now, just yesterday, my Mother had a stroke. She is unable to talk, and is weak on her right side. It was a pretty sizable event. She drove herself to the hospital. I have been here, in the ICU, all night. I must admit to having a pretty hard time with all this. I know I have been crabby ..... no, a complete asshole, at times over the last few years. All I can tell you all is that I have had a series of events that just seemed to have taken the music out of me, beginning in 2004. This past year, with the loss of an aunt, an uncle, two cousins, Ciara's accident and the lost of our Terra, my Father's aneurysm and months long recovery, and now this ..... well it just takes a toll. And my mother just doesn't deserve to be saddled with this. She has spent her whole life doing for others. She is the person that the following poem could have been written about: With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me. And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter. I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells And run my stick along the public railings And make up for the sobriety of my youth. I shall go out in my slippers in the rain And pick the flowers in other people's gardens And learn to spit. You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat And eat three pounds of sausages at a go Or only bread and pickle for a week And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes. But now we must have clothes that keep us dry And pay our rent and not swear in the street And set a good example for the children. We must have friends to dinner and read the papers. But maybe I ought to practice a little now? So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple My Mom, when invited to Grandparents day, taught the kids how to shoot spitballs. The teacher's log called her "Naughty Grandma" and it has stuck. She is a great heart, and there is nothing she would not do for others. It breaks my heart that she has to now deal with this, when she should just be enjoying herself. The truth is, she will deal with it better than I will. Because that is my mom. So once again, with tears in my eyes, I am turning to my friends in this community for support, prayers, and good thoughts. I know I have pretty well used up my quota, but the need is great. I will sing again, but somehow I suspect it will be with a bit of sadness, and a dose of gratefullness for having my mom. But for now ..... Mick |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: Andrez Date: 26 Dec 08 - 08:21 AM Hi Mick, I know its just past Christmas but I just added a Christmas cheer to the Mudcat Christmas cheers thread below the line and then I thought of you and your daughter and her friend who died and her parents too. Even though I dont know any of you in an immediate sense I still feel connected your story in this thread by the truth in the first sentence of this thread: "The most precious thing on this earth is our children". My daughter is sleeping and safe at home right now. I dont know what life is going to throw at her in times to come. I dont even know if I will be able to be part of those events for better or worse either. Thats a scary scenario to me but no less a description of how things actually are...... so the only thing I can see myself doing is to take things as they come and enjoy the experience of my daughter as it happens one day at a time. I think that the more days we can share that way the less the chance of regret for missed opportunities if radical changes ever happen to our family as happened to you and yours. I dont know whats happening for anyone connected by the tragedy of this story and I'm not really asking for an update from any morbid (or other) sense of curiousity, but I just wanted to wish you and you family and the other family the warmest and most sincere Christmas greetings I am capable of giving through this post and hope that at some level in some small way some healing has started to blossom and that the pain has lessened where possible. As much as I'd like to say something as well to the family who lost their child, anything said would be trite in the face of the loss and so I wont try other than to hope that by coming together as a family at this time of the year that they gain some comfort and strength from each other and from the people and community closest to them. The next most precious thing after our children is the love and warmth to be found in the caring, sharing and common humanity expressed by everyone who has had input into this very special thread. It can never replace the loss of a child but I think it can only help with the pain and possibly, hopefully, the healing too. Merry Christmas to Mick and everyone else who has been touched by his story. Andrez |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: JedMarum Date: 26 Aug 08 - 11:46 AM Stole our computer??? What a sad, low-life one must have to be so thoughtless to his/her fellow man, especially at such a time. Sorry you have to put up with it - but I suppose under the circumstances it is only adding insult to injury! My very best for you and for your Dad's recovery. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: semi-submersible Date: 26 Aug 08 - 06:07 AM Good wishes still flowing your way. M in BC |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Partridge Date: 25 Aug 08 - 02:47 AM loads of love Mick Pat xxx |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Tinker Date: 24 Aug 08 - 10:58 PM Blessings and Light,dear one,blessings and light..... tink |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: Janie Date: 24 Aug 08 - 09:55 PM refresh |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: gnu Date: 21 Aug 08 - 04:16 PM Ditto what Janie said so well. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: Janie Date: 20 Aug 08 - 11:20 PM Your Dad, you, and all your family are strongly in my thoughts tonight, Mick. No words to add, just a reminder that so many care, and offer what we have...the caring. Love, Janie |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Anne Lister Date: 20 Aug 08 - 05:01 AM Mick, we've been through the mill and back over the past few months as well although our tally of losses is less than yours, so here's a huge pile of empathy to stir into those casseroles. Anne |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: Celtaddict Date: 20 Aug 08 - 12:29 AM Mick, my dear friend, I can only add my very best hopes that the dreadful load you carry will be lighter over time, and that that time be soon. We are with you, so many of us. Take care of yourself; Ciara and your Da need you to be in good enough shape to truly be with them, and that won't happen without you taking what you must have of rest, and time to yourself, and whatever comforts you find. The computer is just a thing; Ciara is alive, and your Da is hanging in there, and if it is indeed his time, you have had a chance to be with him and to let him know again and directly just how much you care for him. Light to you again and again. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: AllisonA(Animaterra) Date: 19 Aug 08 - 09:44 PM Beaming yet more light and love your way, dear friend. Bless you. |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Joybell Date: 19 Aug 08 - 09:43 PM Been off in a strange place. Late thoughts and hugs from me too, Mick. I don't have the words either. Joy |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@110 From: Genie Date: 19 Aug 08 - 09:16 PM What Jacquie said, Mick. And what Janie said too! Genie |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: catspaw49 Date: 19 Aug 08 - 08:28 AM 400.................Well why not? This thread deserves some sort of stupid laugh doesn't it? So 400!!!! "If I laugh at any mortal thing, t'is that I may not weep."......Lord Byron (George Gordon) Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Bobert Date: 19 Aug 08 - 08:22 AM How's yer dad, mick??? Ya' know, I hate a thief... I really do... Sometimes I think that Islam has it right when it comes to stealin'... Maybe we should just do it one finger at a time, I donno... But in the much larger piccure, laptops can be replaced... Dads can't and this ol' hillbilly has had yer dad in my thoughts since reading about him... Prayers still going out for him and your family... They say that into each life a little rain must fall but, geeze Louise, you gotta a hurricane on yer hands, Mick... But thru it all, God is with ya'... He sho nuff is and He's doing what He can... Might not look like it but He's workin'... B~ |
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Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-8/17@1102 PM From: Lizzie Cornish 1 Date: 19 Aug 08 - 07:45 AM OK, here's what you do, Mick.... 1. Check the ops list for the day, if anyone called A. B*gger is booked in for a laptopectomy, (a space age operation involving removal of old laptop and insertion of new) find nurse's outfit and squeeze yourself into it. 2. Go to medical supplies cupboard, take out largest enema you can find...hey take half a dozen. 3. Shimmy into operating theatre, smile at said patient, whilst gently patting their arm. 4. *Just* before they go under, wave said enemas in front of them and smile once more. 5. After patient is in the Land of Nod, remove shiny laptop from medical trolley and exit, stage left. 6. Remove nurse's uniform. 7. Worry like hell about burly doctor who winked at you several times as you walked into theatre earlier on, making mental note to avoid him next day. 8. Go home, remembering to enter via windows, as door is now completely hidden by casserole pots. 9. Eat large volumes of said casseroles, in assorted flavours, colours and textures, washed down with exceedingly large doses of anything VERY alcoholic. 9. Just before passing out, smile and remember we are all out here, surrounding you and your family with love. 10. On waking next morning, look up at sun, and know that every day which passes brings you closer to the light. Loads of love..xx |
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