Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-Apr 29, 2011

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 02:25 AM

love from far away Australia to you both, Mick & Ciara

sandra

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 02:50 AM

Oh Mick..... not enough words and too public a desk to say the ones I can think of.... The reporter deserves to have his ass kicked, go for it man!

Love from the other side of the pond and the smelly metrolopis of London.

LTS

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Waddon Pete
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 04:07 AM

Good to hear that you are keeping on keeping on Mick.

Thank you for the updates and many healing thoughts still wafting over from Suffolk.

Spaw...what you said....exactly right!

Love from Suffolk,

Peter

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: scouse
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 04:31 AM

Mick.. Thanks for your update. My minds often in turmoil over what reporters make up just to sell their version of news.
My thoughts and love to you and your family,
As Aye,
Phil.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Little Robyn
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 05:23 AM

Love from New Zealand as well.
Robyn

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: jacqui.c
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 07:55 AM

Go do battle Mick - this is a righteous fight.

Like Kat, I thought there was more to this than the news report. It's amazing what the traffic reconstruction guys can work out from the circumstances and the damage to the vehicles. I worked as a motor accident claims negotiator for quite a while and I know what force it must have taken to do enough damage to a car to cause such devastation.

Love to you all from Maine.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: SINSULL
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 08:28 AM

Any chance of getting this reporter's desk and home phone numbers? Or better yet, her editor's? Several of us would be glad to call and ask (politely) why she was stalking a young woman who obviously was too ill and shaken to protect her own interests. How much reporting could she get done with hundreds of messages clogging her voice mail? Just a thought...

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 08:30 AM

Mick,

I am happy to hear that all is going as well as could be expected, although I remain sad about your loss. Like Spaw, I often wonder if the Mudcat is the place it used to be. Looking at the responses to your plight, I realize that there is still much good here. I have come to know you face to face and know you are as strong as your postings. I know many who have posted on this thread only know Mick as a specific character on the Mudcat, yet, they still care about you. I am still learning. May God be with you and with both families.

Big RiB

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 08:38 AM

Kick butt and them stomp it into the dirt.

You need help, I know some damned fine lawyers out that way who would LOVE to get involved.

That reporter is lookin' at a major fine and, perhaps, slammer time. ohmythatwouldbetoobad.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: GUEST,Marymac90
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 10:10 AM

Mick,

My thoughts are going out to you and both families
in this difficult time. I'm glad to find that
this community is still here, and here for you.
Remember that you deserve all this support.

Much love to all from Dela-where?

Marymac

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Den
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 12:03 PM

I don't come around much anymore Mick so first off I'm sorry to be posting so late. Like everyone else I'm very sorry for your troubles but time is a wonderful healer. Hold your daughter close and let her know often that you love her.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Willie-O
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 12:06 PM

It is a beautiful lazy summer morning. I am so happy to have a couple of dreadlocked teenagers--one known to me, one not--sleeping it away in our living room, after my son and daughter and friends stayed up noisily until about 4 (right under our bedroom). Seriously, it made me happy. I didn't even go ask them to keep it down at 2 am.

I love Mick and his family and wish them all the support they need in this crisis. But I have my doubts that having a bunch of us harassing the small-town Michigan media is going to be useful in any way. Mick is closest to the situation, and if he feels that the story has been misreported in a prejudicial manner, (there appears to be a pretty good case for that) he can and is addressing it--whether by a letter to the editor or a lawsuit is up to the Lanes. We must all bear in mind that an event like this often leads to various types of legal action, and MORE unwanted media coverage, and as friends of the Lanes it is not our place to provoke anything. Might just have un-useful blowback. We should consider the trauma already experienced by Terra's family, and no doubt by the other driver and his loved ones. If members of the media have acted improperly, (and bear in mind that doing something abhorrent and tasteless isn't necessarily illegal, they are quite different scales and rightly so) they will hear about it and may face consequences, but I think we should leave it with Mick and Mary Lou to pursue the matter as they see fit.         

With deepest respect and hopes for speedy healing for Ciara and all touched by this tragedy

Bill

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Wesley S
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 12:34 PM

Mick - I'm glad to hear that you've started down the long road of recovery. The trip will seem shorter because you are united as a family. There 's an old saying : "People are like teabags. You never know how strong they are until you get them in hot water". I suspect there is a lot of strength to be found in your family. And in this Mudcat family as well. You and I both know that one don't we?

As far as the reporter goes I would have to ask myself: Is that something that Edward R Morrow would have done? Or David Brinkley? No - of course not. I know it's a different world but somewhere in that reporters heart there should have been a meter that tells them : No - this is going too far. No matter how much I want to get ahead in this business.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 02:10 PM

Mick! Thanks for the update. You've a grand lassie there!

My thoughts and good wishes to Ciara and Terra's folks.

'spaw! Spot on!

G-P

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Mrrzy
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 02:38 PM

A grand lassie with a grand father too.

Get that reporter for her, Mick!

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: astro
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 02:54 PM

Mick,

As a father of a 21 year old daughter I just cringe at what you have had to go through. It is a father's (and mother's) nightmare for what may happen to their children. It is a testament to the parents of the poor lost girl in their response to your daughter. My toast and heartfelt feelings towards them that I extend. I can't imagine any other way to deal with this than what they have done to heal and face life again.

I hope you and your daughter will just have those quiet times to hold, cry, and to celebrate life together.

I would only suggest lightly, remember there are always inconsiderate slobs out there (the reporter) who blunder through life only looking out for themselves. Don't let those idiots take up your attention that should be for those quiet times. Unless people like that reporter learn, they will quickly be forgotten in this life, they are truly hopeless and the testament of their lives will be worthless.

Just know that though you and I don't know one another, a dad just sits here with feelings of sadness, hope for the future, and love for my own along with yours.

Astro, in Tucson

btw, I hope the young man who did hit them is looking for peace, forgiveness, and healing too. We all err, but not as greatly as this young man has.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: katlaughing
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 03:11 PM

Wesley, nice paraphrase.:-) Though, it was none other than Eleanor Roosevelt who said A woman is like a tea bag- you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.

It is wonderful to see so many long-time members who haven't been posting in a while. It's a shame it takes something like this to coax them out. Maybe some of you will consider sticking around and sharing with us, more, once again. You have been missed.

Sorry for the thread creep, Mick.

kat

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 09:18 PM

Only just seen this thread - sorry to have been bothering you. I have just been writing to you about something else.

so sorry.

al

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Greg B
Date: 17 Jul 08 - 10:10 PM

She'll be a much stronger woman for this, Mick.

We had a case here, in Bucks County PA last year, where our
stupid overpaid school superintendent chose not to close the
schools...

it was the day for the exams for the 'regents diploma' or
some such. But the roads were icy. Still, he fed his ego.

And a beautiful, innocent, young straight-A student lost
control of her little Honda car on the ice and plowed right into
a gravel truck.

There was little left to identify.

Her family (her Dad is a minister) and the truck driver,
as well as the policemen who cleaned up the mess will never
be the same.

'Nose to the grindstone' our Superintendent is unrepentant,
at $US 150K+ per year.

The things we teach our children.

What sort of car was it that took that sort of care of her
in the impact?

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: SINSULL
Date: 18 Jul 08 - 08:33 AM

Grieving takes a number of forms - all healthy - and anger is one. Your broken heart is on its way to healing. One day at a time, Mick. There are a few people here who are in my thoughts every day - your family, Spaw's, the Captain and Jacqui, Tami and TRUBRIT's family, Miss Kitty (katlaughing), Maeve and a few others - the list keeps growing. None of us is ever alone.
SINS

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Max
Date: 18 Jul 08 - 08:40 AM

Much love from me and mine to you and yours. I will kiss my kids even more than I already do too much. You are right, you have some important things to do now, and I couldn't think of a better man for the job. Love you Mick.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 18 Jul 08 - 08:54 AM

Thinking of you and willing power and strength and healing your way. I hope this wannabe local reporter is made to suffer some serious consequences for this irresponsible, unprofessional, cruel action. A lawsuit might be an idea, if you have the mental energy for it. Or public naming and shaming (if that doesn't compromise you legally).

Ciara and your family have people from all over the globe pulling for you. She sounds like an amazing young woman, who will come shining through and be the stronger for it. Keep us informed -

Bonnie in Ireland xxx

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Tinker
Date: 18 Jul 08 - 09:49 AM

My week has been full of Mudcat thoughts in a way it hasn't been in a very long time. Some community ties call us together regardless of distance in space or time or perspective. Mudcat has taught me alot about that.
Mick, your response is spot on, "normal" is what we are all in the process of becoming. Sometimes its hard to remember that the interplay of light and shadow is part of the pattern. Mudcat threads like this really do weave us together.

Oh, by the time you get back from the shore there just may be a package -- Well, maybe for MaryLou and Ciara so far you seem to be safe...

Love and hugs all around

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: lady penelope
Date: 18 Jul 08 - 04:53 PM

Mick, you've done so well by you and yours so far, I know you'll keep doing just that. What a tremendous woman you've raised. For every tear of sadness for this tragedy, you've brought a tear of joy by sharing the warmth, determination and love that this awful situation has engendered.

I feel privilaged to have been included in this.

Much Love, Penny.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 19 Jul 08 - 04:21 PM

The business about this reporter is a side issue - but I'd be inclined to think that the responsibility for her actions should be shared with the people above her - and quite possibly with the major fault lying with them.

But the main thing is how Ciara and her familky, and Terra's family, are getting through this, and hoping that our solidarity at a distance is doing something to help with this.   

It sounds to me, in line with what I'd suspected, that the cause of this tragedy was this young man's impatient driving, overtaking at speed in a situation where no one should overtake.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: semi-submersible
Date: 19 Jul 08 - 05:47 PM

Loving wishes still flow to both families every day. Thanks so much for the updates.

That word "debt" touched some nerves the other day, didn't it! To create an obligation, you'd have to be set apart from us. In a family "one hand washes the other." For this we are all grateful. We are particularly thankful to you, Big Mick.

William Carlos Williams exhorted us to share our grief openly with neighbours, "who have perhaps nothing to lose... Share with us..." for as we give ourselves to others' needs, we make ourselves part of something larger - community, as you said - and we always get back more than we give, so humans go on helping each other.

Thus, everyone who responded (and all the others hearing and silently sending love your way) owns gratitude toward you too, as to all who reach out to others with honest hearts. Sharing makes community real. Without your words we would have missed the communion given at such awful cost.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Genie
Date: 19 Jul 08 - 07:20 PM

Oh, Mick, how terrible for Ciara to have her name (and Terra's) basically besmirched by the irresponsible acts of local "news" personnel on top of the trauma of the accident itself, Terra's death, and her own very serious injuries!   Taking the media to task over this is a very worthwhile cause, and if getting involved in that helps you and your family and Terra's work through your grief, more power to you.   If not, I hope you can set it aside temporarily while you continue the work of helping your wonderful daughter and both families heal. An incredibly hard task but one you seem to be quite well equipped for.

I am so glad the Mudcat community is here for you and yours and grateful to be a part of it.

Love and prayers from Oregon.

Genie

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 19 Jul 08 - 09:35 PM

Oh I wanted to say exactly the same thing but didn't know how to phrase it. I hope you enjoy slapping the journalists around, figuratively speaking, so long as it remains just a diversionary hobby for blowing off steam. They are a diversion, though.

I'm also very pleased she doesn't have to work through having made a mistake with large consequences. Instead, it's wrong place wrong time.

Dan

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: JedMarum
Date: 21 Jul 08 - 04:55 PM

I know the communication on this thread is winding down, but the thoughts and prayers continue. Still thinking you and yours Mick.

Well said, Colin Randall on the issue of the reporter.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: gnu
Date: 21 Jul 08 - 05:06 PM

Yes, Jed. Certainly continuing.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: skipy
Date: 21 Jul 08 - 05:20 PM

Stil here & stil saddened
Skipy

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Pistachio
Date: 21 Jul 08 - 05:45 PM

Continuing wishes from East Yorkshire, still checking in on this thread. Glad that Ciara got the 'proof' it was not her error at the junction.
((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS ALL ROUND)))))))))))))))))
Hazel

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: kytrad (Jean Ritchie)
Date: 21 Jul 08 - 07:20 PM

Mick and family- George, Jon and I are just checking in after over six weeks away. Still cannot believe this thread and the tragedy and heartbreak it gives us to share. Share it we do, deeply and lovingly.

Dear Ciara, I still see you, a beautiful young thing, dancing on our lawn with all our singing friends around, smiling and enjoying your lovliness and grace. I am 85, so that is probably always the way I shall remember you. May that grace get you through these tragic times, and accompany you and all you know throughout a life filled with great accomplishment for all things Good in this old world, which is in its greatest need for all the lovliness and grace it can get. You and your dear friend, whose last moment was one of laughter and joy, will do it together.

Love,   Jean

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Peter T.
Date: 22 Jul 08 - 11:16 AM

About Mudcat: As catspaw said.

Ciara is a beautiful girl with a strong father, both of whom are among life's givers. Neither of those are going to change.

yours,

Peter T.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Waddon Pete
Date: 23 Jul 08 - 11:22 AM

I've just been listening to Utah Phillips talking abut the folk community on his podcast.

He, also, greatly appreciated the caring, loving circle that includes all lovers of folk music. This circle is especially evident on this thread. Mick....you are all still in our thoughts and in our hearts

Love from Suffolk,

Peter

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Big Mick
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 10:47 AM

Folks, I cannot adequately express how very important all your messages have been. They helped, and continue to help, us know that this is something that can be dealt with and that there are folks that care.

I have received so many PM's and some beautiful cards, that it is going to take me quite a while to personally respond to each one, but that is what I will do a little at a time. Many of those wonderful pm/messages/cards came from folks that are so dear and close to me that you already know how much I love you and appreciate you.

Ciara is doing very well, has some stiffness in her neck when she wakes up in the morning, and is chomping at the bit to dance again (she currently cannot do anything jarring until the spleen heals). Mentally she is in a very good spot, but I can see the sadness and the hiding that the therapy will help us work through.

Terra's family are working through their sadness, and it breaks my heart still to even think about that pain. But it is what it is, and we simply must work through it.

I am in the midst of my struggle with the media, and it is far from over.

All the best,

Mick

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 10:53 AM

Loads of love, Mick. xx

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Peace
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 11:14 AM

Ditto that.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 12:14 PM

Still sending good thoughts Mick, every day.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: SINSULL
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 12:20 PM

I will see you at the Getaway. Until then I surround you with and yours with love and light.
If I could make it all go away I would.
Love,
Mary

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 12:26 PM

I feel pretty confident when I say that you are not expected to reply to any of the PM's you have received.

Mine was intended to ease your burden - not add to it.

Take care.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Big Mick
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 12:43 PM

Lox, my friend, it is not a burden. To answer loving people who are expressing care and concern is a task that I take up with gratitude. I am just not quite up to it yet, but I will be and look forward to it.

All the best,

Mick

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: gnu
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 03:59 PM

Keeping you in thoughts and prayers, buddy.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: Escapee
Date: 04 Aug 08 - 07:51 PM

We're right behind you, Mick.
Marty

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: KT
Date: 05 Aug 08 - 12:15 AM

Thinking of you all, Mick, sending lots of love your way.....There will be a lot of us joining in that dance!

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: JedMarum
Date: 05 Aug 08 - 12:26 AM

Wishing you and your the best, Mick. You've been on our minds this week as we begin a new project.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Keith A of Hertford
Date: 05 Aug 08 - 05:43 AM

I hope you continue to find the strength you need, and that your friends here may provide some of that.
keith.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: Beer
Date: 05 Aug 08 - 07:33 AM

The above "GUEST" spammer hasn't been dealt with as yet. He/she is on most threads.
Mick, still thinking of the load you are carrying. May you continue to find strength.
Adrien

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940
From: maeve
Date: 05 Aug 08 - 08:15 AM

Mick, as I listened to and watched David Coffin and his sweet daughter on Saturday, I thought of you and those you love.

Subject: RE: Obit: My heart is broken-Mick**Update-7/16@940pm
From: SINSULL
Date: 05 Aug 08 - 10:05 AM

I thought the same, Maeve. I remember a festival where Mick played and Ciara danced with pure joy and abandon.