Lyr Req: Alphabet song !

Subject: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: GUEST,stu2104
Date: 19 Mar 09 - 10:17 AM

Hi does anyone have the words to a funny take off of the alphabet? Sorry I don't know who wrote it but one of the lines is "I is a name I calls myself" and ends with now I know my r's from my elbow.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: pavane
Date: 19 Mar 09 - 11:12 AM

There's LOADS of them.

One example, the Cockney Alphabet starts " 'Ay is for 'Orses"


(Me, a name I call myself" comes from the Sound of Music ...)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: GUEST,stu2104
Date: 19 Mar 09 - 02:36 PM

Cheers John I'll try that one out.

Subject: Lyr Add: A SURREALIST ALPHABET / COCKNEY ALPHABET
From: Mark Dowding
Date: 19 Mar 09 - 07:14 PM

This is the surrealist alphabet performed by Clapham and Dwyer (The Wireless Nuicances)

A SURREALIST ALPHABET
(performed by Clapham and Dwyer)

"Hello, Uncle Charlie... and what have you got for the kiddies, this afternoon?"
"Hello, Uncle Willie... well I've got cakes and some porridge and..."
"No, no... what have you got in the way of entertainment?"
"Oh!... I've got a new alphabet."
"A new alphabet?"
"A brand new alphabet... it's a surreal-al-al-al-ist alphabet."
"A what?"
"Don't you know what surreal-al-al-al-ism is?"
"Oh!... surrealism!... Something different!"
"That's it!... instead of 'A for apple', 'B for boy' and 'C for cat'..."
"Ah!... you're going to be changing all that!"
"Yes, I'm going to be all new."
"May we try it?"
"We'll try it now, shall we?"
"Off we go, then."

A for 'orses (Hay for Horses)
B for Mutton (Beef or mutton)
C for th' 'ighlanders (Seaforth Highlanders)
D for ential (Differential)
E for Adam (Eve for Adam)
F for vessence (Effervesence)
G for police (Chief of police)
H for respect (Have respect)
I for novello (Ivor Novello)
J for orange (Jaffa orange)
K for ancis (Kay Francis)
L for leather (Hell for leather)
M for sis (Emphasis)
N for lope (Envelope)
O for the garden wall (Over the garden wall)
P for relief (Pee for relief)
Q for music (Cue for music)
R for mo ('Arf a mo)
S for you (it's for you)
T for 2 (Tea for two)
U for films
V for la France (Viva la France)
W for a fiver (Double you for a fiver)
X for breakfast (Eggs for breakfast)
Y for God's sake (Why, for God's sake)
Z for breezes (Zephyr breezes)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: pavane
Date: 20 Mar 09 - 04:19 AM

I see many there which are the same as the Cockney Alphabet (A, D, F, G, M, T, W, Z), at least the version I have from John Foreman c1973

Some differences I can remember are:

C for yourself
E for Brick ('Eave, or Heave, a brick)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 20 Mar 09 - 04:57 AM

And the only line not explained in brackets is "U for films"
Presumably refers to the BBFC (British board of film censorship) grading of "U" for 'Universally suitable'

Cheers
Nigel

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: Mark Dowding
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 03:47 AM

I must check the alphabet I posted against the recording of the two performing it that I've just got hold of which was from 1936. I lifted the words from www.monologues.co.uk.
Charlie Clapham was a friend of my father's mother - this came to light when I was doing some family research and my auntie pulled a photograph out of the tin box and told me it was a "picture of a singer called Clapham at your granny's house". Of course this was 20 years after she died so I couldn't ask her about him or anybody else she might have known. I've since found out that she also knew Randolph Sutton who was a big name in variety who sung the original version of "The Rawtenstall Annual Fair" (which is actually called "At Rawtenstall Fair")in 1932.

(Just realised I've spelled "nuisances" incorrectly above)

Cheers
Mark

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: Steve Gardham
Date: 21 Mar 09 - 05:30 PM

Unfortunately none off these are related to what the OP wanted. These lines don't occur in any of the well-known alphabets in oral tradition.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: GUEST,stu2104
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 04:26 AM

Hi all, I now believe the words I'm after are from a Sid Kipper song and may be called the illiterates alphabet. Anyone have the words? Cheers

---

Kipper "Illiterates Alphabet" thread (click)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: GUEST,Andrew
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 01:23 AM

Can some body please help me? I have been looking for a song about the alphabet since 1993. it was a tape and book set. I believe it was called an alphabet fair. and it goes like this. "We're having an alphabet fair, and all of the letters are there. Theirs apples for A. Balloons for B. and Cassie's cake for C. We've got doughnuts, eggs and fries, for D, E, F. Gifts and Hats and invitations too. G, H, I. We're having an alphabet fair ..." and it goes on. i would really appreciate the help.
Thank you.
-Andrew.-

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Alphabet song !
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 04:13 PM

I could find only one thing at WorldCat.org that has "alphabet fair" as part of its title:

Title: Cubbi Gummi's alphabet fair.
Other Titles: Disney's Cubbi Gummi's alphabet fair.
Author: Walt Disney Productions.
Publisher: London : Fleetway, 1987.
Series: Gummi bears., My first activity pad.
Edition/Format: Book : English
ISBN: 1853860298 9781853860294
Description: 96 p.