Birthday Memoriam Andie-VTam's daughter

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: olddude
Date: 14 Feb 10 - 12:16 PM

Tam
for you my dear friend
Memorial Day

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 14 Feb 10 - 01:49 PM

oh Dan... how heartbreakingly wonderful... thank you.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 14 Feb 10 - 03:31 PM

Breaks the heart, or warms a frozen logjam?

~S~

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 15 Feb 10 - 02:51 AM

both...

logjam of tears was definitely broken yesterday... may be a week or so before I return to posting stuff to this thread.

my eyes, sinuses and head need recupe time.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 15 Feb 10 - 10:22 AM

Yup, and pls review my prev. guidelines on how to keep your attention out into present time (and adrenal care for self) so the break is mos' fruitful.

~S~

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: olddude
Date: 15 Feb 10 - 10:27 AM

Hey Tam
have listen to DWditty's doing accent-u-ate the positive. I posted that and 'ain't nobody's business' in a thread Now I know how much you love the ragtime and blues and I guarantee he will make you smile with those ..

love you
Dan

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 16 Feb 10 - 03:16 PM

Sigh! Looking up some info on Mediaeval Baebes cd, The Rose for a friend and I see that my sleeve notes are signed by some of the members of the group.

Then remembered the concert at Joust Berkeley Castle summer 2004. Andie was with me. She had introduced me to their music some 2 or 3 years prior.

At this juncture Andie was so thin and ill. But she asked some of the girls during the signing "how does one get to be a Baebe?" One of them said, "you have to drink a potion from my slipper" or some such silliness.

I just wanted Andie to be as healthy as those young women. Had she been feeling better at the time, no doubt she would have struck up conversation with one or more as they were wondering about the grounds between concerts. As it was she sat under a tree most of the day and slept.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: olddude
Date: 16 Feb 10 - 05:33 PM

You are in my thoughts, my prayers and in my heart. No one could say they understand because just the thought of losing one of mine would be too much to bear. All I can say Tam is you are loved, you have good friend and you can count on any one of us at any time for anything. We will be the first to come and the last to leave when you need us

Love Dan

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 16 Mar 10 - 03:40 PM

I have been in Andie's LiveJournal and found these

I cannot pace the dragon...
nor match an eagle's flight...
would that it could be so...
you'd sing for us tonight...

rest well Andie

from her Live Journal friend Faheud


My friends,

I have the sad duty to report that my student, my apprentice, and my dear friend Lady Francesca Zancani, Andi Robbins passed away this past thursday night. Cesca had been very sick for a long time and her body was not equal to her spirit.

Please pray for Cesca and her family.

Heartbroken,
byram

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 16 Mar 10 - 03:46 PM

Andie's last two LiveJournal posts both 3 days before she passed

April 25 2005
07:57 pm   

Did absolutly nothing today but chilled at the Library, and sang Evanescence very loudly out of my open car window. YAY for my supreme vocal machine! I really need to be in a band. Seriously. I want to cover Personal Jesus...shame my name isn't Faith. *grin*

O! This is a great quote by the way!

"So long as both sides of the couple were happy and with needs met, honor respected, no one forced or harmed, did it mater if the couple was comprised of two women or two men?" Jennifer Roberson- Sword Born
Yay for open minded fiction!!!!

12:22 pm

I hate it when I'm in C'ville, and I plan on going to the Dawning, but I do something stupid like lay down because I have a migrane at 9:30 and thusly effectively sleep until 12:50 and just say fuck it and go back to sleep.

This weekend was ok. Had a talk with LohQi, he got a phone,(which means I get to hear from him every now and again, that is a happy thought) we just sorta chilled all weekend, because he was sick, which he blames on me. The worst thing that happened was me locking my keys in my car Friday night. The best watching them obcess over the new game that Goo got.

My birthday is coming. I'm sure I won't be doing anything, and I think I'm ok with that. Soon I'll be 24. I remember thinking that it was going to be so great to be an adult (hahahahahahaha) and that I couldn't wait to be old. Ugh. Only one more year to 25, but at least then I can move out (dad will have his license back) and never look back.

I am really unsatisfied with my life. I'm not happy. I don't really have any friends any more. That's the one thing that really pisses me off. My parents never had any friends while I was growing up and I remember noticing that and praying that I wouldn't become the same way. I miss being social so badly, but it's too fucking difficult to get out there and meet new people. I feel like I'm too weird for the normal people and too normal for the weird people. I'm in a fucking state of limbo. I miss the part of me that would walk up to strangers and say Hi...I'm Andie, you looked kinda lonely so I thought I'd just...

*sigh* That girl doesn't exsist anymore. She was fun...I miss her. How sad is it that the highlight of my day is surfing around online? I wish I could get angry about it and find a solution, but the solution would be getting the hell away from my father, which isn't going to happen for another year. I hope that when I do escape that I will be happier and that I will find my lust for life again. I used to be able to channel my depression into song writing and poetry but I can't seem to find the energy to care. I fucking hate being depressed. It brings down the few people that still enjoy my company. *sigh*

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 16 Mar 10 - 04:05 PM

I hold her.

And you, Tam.

~Susan

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 03:40 AM

To Andie

They passed the health bill. Finally. I had no idea how hard this would hit me. I am weeping with rage and relief.

I am so sorry it is too late to save you. But I know you are rejoicing in this for others.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Crow Sister (off with the fairies)
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 05:38 AM

"I am weeping with rage and relief."

Yes, I imagine you must be..
Take care x

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 05:45 AM

Still holding you, whiskerwoman.

~S~

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 03:18 PM

Why has this thread been moved to BS? I requested in the original post that it be permitted to stay above the line, because Andie was all about music. Her whole life dedicated to it. Everyone who knew her associated her with singing. Music was who she was life and who she is in everyone's memory of her.

There was no problem with this thread staying above the line before.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: gnu
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 03:33 PM

Wish I had words...........

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 03:54 PM

I have asked a clone to take a look and if possible move it up. If not, Miss Tam, Andie's memorial is on a music site where we share her love for the songs and tunes.
Mary

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Crow Sister (off with the fairies)
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 05:41 PM

"Why has this thread been moved to BS?"

Don't know. Joe seems to have given 'honorary music thread' status to the re-Imagined village thread too (for which I'm glad btw.). So I'm sure some discretion must be available to moderators in this regard?

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Joe Offer
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 02:03 AM

Hi, Virginia Tam-
I did honor your original request that this thread be in the music section, but I didn't expect that it would be active for so long. I figured I could grant an exception because the thread would be active a few days and then drop off the Forum Menu. But the thread was initiated almost a year ago now, and has been refreshed many times over the year. Now it's time for it to be in the non-music section. It has very little music information, and is not likely to be of interest to visitors outside our community.

We placed the music section at the top of the Forum Menu to make music information available to visitors who come here for music research. This thread is far too personal to be of interest to visitors.

I'm sorry if this offended you. That was not my intent.

-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 03:31 AM

Well, now Andie is in the basement. A friend has pointed out she is in good company down here.

Were she alive and participating in mudcat, she would have spent most of her time here anyway. She was a very sharp tongued, outspoken and opinionated young woman. Also mischievous. I think you all would have liked her very much and some would have been just as annoyed by her as often as not.

Welcome to the basement, Andie. Some of the best people party down here.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 04:48 AM

5 years ago today, after 8:30 EST she will have been pronounced dead.


Trying to distract myself. Think I will go clean kitchen now.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 05:13 AM

My thoughts are with you. Andie sounds as though she was a beautiful, vital young woman. I'm so glad you feel able to share her with us. (I see that she credits her parents at the top of the list of her inspirations.) God bless you, and her.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: olddude
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 08:43 AM

Virginia
   I bet they are doing some really fine music. I am sure my dad with teach her some old Irish songs with his big tenor voice. Thoughts and Prayers with you today my dear friend.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 11:16 AM

(((All Whisker Girls)))


All Love,

~Susan
(PS, Ya know, Tam, for those of us who have this thread "Traced," it is not necessary to be IN "BS" to see and jump back into it.)

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Ebbie
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 12:08 PM

{{{{{{long hug, and a few tears of my own}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: LilyFestre
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 12:37 PM

(((((((((((Added hugs and love))))))))))))))

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 02:21 PM

Dear all

you are all dears

Dan- I love the idea that Andie is singing with your Dad. She may have a few things to teach him, if I know my daughter.


a few of her friends on facebook and live journal are remembering her today too which feels good and bad at the same time. I just wish she was here with me cracking jokes and singing, instead of off somewhere singing with others.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 02:33 PM

Tam - hoping to meet you at Sidmouth and give you a hug in person!

All best wishes

Kitty

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 28 Apr 10 - 05:03 PM

are the stars or is Andie trying to tell me something?

Recently I have been practicing the G&E Pratt version of Silver Whistle - I plan to sing it at Sweeps (probably on 2nd May the day I buried Andie).

Now for a little background. Andie taught me the Silly Sisters version of Silver Whistle years ago. This morning I revived this thread with info about Silver Whistle.

Review: Graham & Eileen Pratt's music

Around noon thirtyish today I received an email from Graham Pratt telling me that he had created a youtube account. And what should I find there? Silver Whistle.

So Silver Whistle seems to be indelibly linked to Andie and her passing day.

weird and cosmic innit?

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Ebbie
Date: 29 Apr 10 - 11:31 AM

Yep

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 09 May 10 - 03:13 PM

29 years ago, 2 days after Mother's Day you were born. 7 lbs, 7 oz of pink baby doll. There was not a mark on you. The nurses didn't want to let you go and all commented on how pretty you were. 2 weeks overdue and after 17 hours labour, they seemed to think you should have been more bruised looking. But you were picture perfect. Tuesday's child is full of grace. Of personal grace, indeed you were.

Several times in your life we shared the special day, your birthday and Mother's day combined. I do wish you were still here with me. Give me strength to get through the next week.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 09 May 10 - 07:10 PM

Tam darlin,' you already have that strength. :~)

~S~

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 10 May 10 - 01:12 PM

Te following (paraphrased) posted on Facebook today, is from a young woman who was in high school with Andie

"i think of her so often....... It takes a very special person to have had the ability to enrich so many lives for having been here for such a short time. :')"

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 12 May 10 - 07:05 AM

Happy 29th birthday darling girl. Hope you are spending it with some great singers and some of your favs like Billie Holiday, Freddie Mercury, Ian Curtis and Kurt Cobain and some of the friends you lost when you were in highschool and uni.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 12 May 10 - 07:59 AM

Happy birthday Andie. Lotta good players up there too, to back your songs.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 12 May 10 - 10:16 AM

Love you, Tam.

~Whiskers

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 25 Apr 11 - 03:10 PM

It's getting near. Every year, I notice the change in season, the change in light, the shape of landscape and colour of the sky and it brings it all home again. What the world looked and felt like, so incredibly beautiful when my daughter died.

And how dare it!

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: gnu
Date: 25 Apr 11 - 03:15 PM

Sigh... I hope time heals ALL wounds, although my words are little solace. Take care VT.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 26 Apr 11 - 12:00 AM

This is the first time I have noticed this thread. Remember the good times.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 26 Apr 11 - 04:36 AM

Every Springtime from now on, Tam, I will look at nature's beauty around me and think of Andie. She will be in every blossom I see, in every bird I hear singing, in every new shoot rising up through the earth, in every sign of life renewing. The Springtime sunshine will be Andie's smile.


She will always be with you, always. xxx

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: wysiwyg
Date: 27 Apr 11 - 03:53 PM

(((VT)))

~Whiskers

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 28 Apr 11 - 08:21 AM

I want to go home

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 28 Apr 11 - 08:24 AM

Love coming your way, Tam...xx

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: ranger1
Date: 28 Apr 11 - 12:21 PM

(((Tam)))

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 03 May 11 - 02:30 AM

Just found a few more of Andie's uni friends on facebook and one has provided a correction to a story above.

"Rescuing cows. Late one night when she and Kimmie had just met, they driving back to Farm Vegas (maybe Andie's name for Farmiville where Longwood uni is because of the lights at night in rural wasteland) they encounter cows escaped from some pasture wandering on the road. So Andie decided they had to notify the owner. But who? Which field, what drive? So they opted for the first drive, drove as near the house as possible. Would have gotten out and knocked on door but for the guard dogs barking angrily all around. So she leaned on the horn and shouted out of partly rolled down window. "Your cows are loose." Then to Kimmie, "nKay, I did the right thing, now let's go." Evidently this made a big impression on Kimmie."

This story was from me, Andie had gone with me up to Collierstown (outside of Lexington) where my family has an old Farm house. I wanted to go on a day trip to take photos for a photography class but didn't want to do it alone. She went with me and we had this cow in the middle of the road experience on the way back. It was quite the experience! We felt we had to be of service by telling someone but that dog was terrifying!
We later told this story in our APO meeting and we were awarded with the weekly "Freak of the Week" award! It was given out to who ever had done the most silly or outrageous thing during the week. Usually a chance to embarrass a brother about something foolish. This was the only time I ever received that award... I usually tried hard to dodge it but couldn't help but share our fun time with the Brotherhood.

Man we had some good times!

Thank you Sarah. Sarah has tagged me in a load of facebook photos (her own and other uni friends) that include Andie. How wonderful to see never before seen pictures of my girl having laughs with her friends.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 08 May 11 - 04:53 PM

Well my favorite cousin Peggy (64) passed away a couple of days ago after a 2 month undiagnosed illness. Peggy had a gorgeous soprano voice. She sang Summertime at Andie's funeral. I told her afterward that I used to sing the same song to Andie when she was a baby. And she returned that she sang it to me when I was a baby. I wish I had been home for the funeral so I could close the circle on the tradition Peggy started.

As my kids did not grow up in my home town, Andie didn't get much opportunity to spend time with my extended family of singers. I am hoping that Andie's wonderful mezzo soprano is harmonising with Peggy's high bright voice now.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 12 May 11 - 01:11 PM

She should be 30 years old today, with me wishing her 60 years more... Happy birthday Andie... forever 23.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 May 11 - 01:15 PM

(((Love to You on this very special day)))

I lost one of my very best friends when he was a young adult. To this day, when it is his birthday, I do something in his honor that I know he would have loved doing. It helps me to remember and more importantly, to smile even if it's just the teeniest bit.

Michelle

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 09:27 AM

Long vivid dream about Andie. She told me lots of stuff but mainly she said to tell her sister, "You don't have to go. Just refuse to believe it. You will be able to come back." I asked her why she didn't come back. She laughed and said "I didn't know it then. Besides, I'm back now."

Really wondering what that last line means. Perhaps back in my dreams. She let me hug her this time. She wouldn't in the first dream about a month after she died. Prevented me from crossing small stream.

She said she was swimming and got pulled out to sea. Perhaps that is what felt like when she died.

It felt like a good dream. She was filling water barrels at this shanty town like place, near beach, filled with people from all walks. Different ages and races, disabled, trans gendered. Like a commune, but people were rather neatly dressed and all busy at some chore or another. Most kids playing on beach and in water. It seemed post apocalyptic in that the structutres were tents and corrigated iron, yet everyone looked well and happy.

She never stopped doing her work while she talked to me. She seemed very contented. I woke before I could ask her if she was still singing and before I could ask if when I die we will be together. Somehow I think she would have avoided the latter question. But I woke feeling at peace in myself somehow.

As the dream faded so did the euphoria and the difference between high and low left me weeping for a bit. But I am better now.

Maybe it is the tramadol I am taking.

Subject: RE: BirthdayMemoriam Andie_VTam's daughter
From: Janie
Date: 04 Nov 11 - 07:02 PM

Or maybe it is the severless tie that love makes.