BS: I am still here.

Subject: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 12:16 PM

That's right. I am still here. They said I was gone, but they was wrong. I ain't leavin'. And you can't make me leave. Any rumors about my departure are as untrue as the false rumors about me and Golda Meir doin' the Oingo-Boingo behind a quonset hut in Haifa in 1963. It never happened. It never will. And I ain't leavin'.

- Chongo

p.s. You will see me takin' the Oath of Office in 2012. I can guaran-dam-tee it.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Tinker
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 12:21 PM

What office?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 12:39 PM

That was a typo Tink, he meant Oath of Orofice

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: bankley
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 01:05 PM

The Ovary Office ?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 01:18 PM

Eggzackly Ron

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 01:20 PM

Just a wee walkabout, then, Chongo Chimp?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Aug 09 - 04:49 PM

He's trying to reassure people. There'd be a mood of great sorrow and deep consternation hereabouts if Chongo ever walked away from the Mudcat forum. There'd be profound regrets and bitter recriminations. I don't like to think about it, and that's why I'm thinking about Winona Ryder instead.... Winona Ryder in a sort of semi-transparent full-length shift and not much else. Mmmm....

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 08 Aug 09 - 04:39 PM

...more of a Rydabout, then, LH..?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Aug 09 - 04:55 PM

I've always been curious...does Chongo dictate these messages, or does he type them himself?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Gurney
Date: 08 Aug 09 - 09:05 PM

Bill, I think that, in the event of his accession to the oval office, he will definately be a dictator.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Gurney
Date: 08 Aug 09 - 09:06 PM

Definitely.
Prat.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 08 Aug 09 - 10:37 PM

Chongo can't type the message; he's a chimpanzee. He dictates them using voice software.


Silly question!

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: open mike
Date: 09 Aug 09 - 01:25 AM

there is a theory that if you put 100 monkeys in a room with 100 typewriters they could eventually type shakespeare...

others say that they will break the typewriters and you would
have a lot of poo to clean up.

then there are these monkeys that learn to wash sweet ppotatoes..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hundredth-monkey_effect

i know chongo is an ape not a monkey...but...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infinite_monkey_theorem

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Aug 09 - 01:29 AM

"there is a theory that if you put 100 monkeys in a room with 100 typewriters they could eventually type shakespeare..."

The internet proves that's not true.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 09 Aug 09 - 01:39 PM

I type 'em myself, Bill. I can do a lotta things. You'd be surprised.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 09 Aug 09 - 02:08 PM

Well get over there to Fakebook and DO them!

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 09 Aug 09 - 10:12 PM

Peace, you have given me the best chuckle of the day. Thanks

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Peace
Date: 09 Aug 09 - 11:54 PM

Hi, leeneia. That's something I read or heard about 15 years ago. Can't recall where or much else, but it struck me the same way it did you. Many thanks.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 12:10 AM

You can put 480 million human beings with keyboards in front of 'em on the Internet, and they can't eventually type Shakespeare either. That was yer point, wasn't it, Peace?

My point is that it's time fer a REAL change in Washington. Elect a chimp in 2012. Matter of fact, elect some chimps in 2010 when the next Congressional elections come up. Vote for the Primate Party this time and put some quadridextrous candidates in Congress.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 12:11 AM

Will the race then be known as the Primateries?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 12:28 AM

That's not a bad idea! Hey, man, you wanta work on our promotional team?

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 12:33 AM

Do I have to dress up?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 12:37 AM

Only on Friday nights. That's if ya want to make a good impression on the dames. If not, it's up to you, I guess.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: Peace
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 02:19 AM

Nothin' kinky, right?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: skarpi
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 02:59 AM

what is you real name , ??

you are no chimp ? that fella left office this year , thank god .

if you want the office ., come out and tell us your name .

Kinky ??PEACE !!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 06:00 AM

Didn't you mean to type "Chongress," Chongo?

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 02:50 PM

"Chongress" is another idea worth considerin', Walkies, but not until I've been in office (as president) for say, at least one full term. People need a little mental preparation for them kinda cultural changes, I figure.

skarpi? My real original name was "Chongo" in the local dialect where I grew up which was the bush country in west central Africa. It sounds a little different in chimpese natural dialect, but it basically is "Chongo". Then I took up with the human traders and people I met and I refined it to human-style "Chongo" like you would say it. It means "he who is alert at all times". So I was just called "Chongo" to begin with. My mother gave me that name. But after I came across to New York on the banana boat I was told by immigration that I hadda have a surname if I was gonna get papers, so I said "What is good?" and they just gave me the generic last name "Chimp", and I have stuck with it. They gave that same last name to thousands of chimps that come over on the boat. Some of 'em kept it, a lot of others didn't. I know one guy, fer instance, he was given that name and he was called Rory Chimp at first, but later he decided to get himself a much more ritzy sounding name and he got it changed to Alvin Vanderbilt III. He figured that name would propel him straight to the pinnacle of success. It didn't. Poor Alvin ended up on the bottom of the Hudson River, wearin' a pair of cement overshoes. Such is life.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Bongo Bimp
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 10:37 PM

If you put a hundred chimps in a room with a hundred typewriters, eventually, you'd get Shakespeare, and he'd be really angry, because the chimps charged the typewriters to his Paypal account. I know that this is true because it happened here at the Community College last year.

Subject: RE: BS: I am still here.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 11:13 PM

Yeah? What'd he do, crawl up out of the grave?

- Chongo