BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?

Subject: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: gnu
Date: 30 Jun 10 - 07:33 AM

Tue Jun 29, 7:26 PM

CALGARY (CBC) - A Calgary brewery is promising a "generous portion" of its new beer in exchange for the safe return of a stolen 2.4-metre tall statue.

Big Rock Brewery said its Eddie, a genial figure holding a bottle of beer, was stolen from the Epcor Centre for the Performing Arts just before midnight on June 7.

The statue, created in the likeness of brewery founder Ed McNally, was displayed at the Big Rock Eddies event that night. The boisterous party celebrates winners of an annual commercial and print ad contest for the brewery.

Surveillance images captured a man wearing a white cowboy hat taking the Eddie statue out of the centre, with another man following behind. Both are described as white and in their thirties.

Big Rock officials said they don't intend to pursue charges, and simply want the statue returned in one piece.

Any information leading to its safe return will be rewarded with a "generous portion" of Big Rock's new Gopher Lager, said the company.

The 23-kilogram statue, made of industrial strength Styrofoam, was created in the late '90s. The company that made two of the "priceless and irreplaceable" Eddie statues for Big Rock is no longer in business.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jun 10 - 10:43 AM

Oh            my          God.

Shame is just a few hours north of me. Shall I go armed or simply let Customs deal with a couple of drunks hauling a 2.4 meter tall statue across...nah, I'll go armed. One right arm and one left arm.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: gnu
Date: 30 Jun 10 - 11:51 AM

Shane musta been in disguise on accounta he only wears ball caps. Unless he was on a spree and stole the cowboy hat prior to Eddie.

As for Customs, I am sure he's on the no-by list.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jun 10 - 02:56 PM

Right shore glad I done went and got me one a them telescope sight fer mah thuty-thuty.   Done got it bore sighted, too, and it's got them colored dots in the middle of them cross-hairs so I kin shoot 'em in low light. Well, not Don, but definitely Shame. Ya think a 170 grain soft point stop him? I know it's gotta be a really good heart-lung shot cuz there ain't no brain there fer a head shot. Ah, hell, he ain't got enough meat on him ta innerest the kiyotes nor the wolves so I might as well save my bullets. Given that he's gotta keep thinking about it just to keep on breathin' an' all, I mean. Never met anybody who couldn't walk and keep his heart beatin' at the same time. Probably shoot him and he'd be too dumb to know he wuz daid.

Ain't gonna bother.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jul 10 - 10:18 AM

Shame McBride: the only person who was so ugly that his mother removed his navel so she wouldn't be associated with him, and who drinks the output of the Clydesdales because he thinks they're a fancy beer tap.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: SINSULL
Date: 01 Jul 10 - 10:45 AM

Oh no! Did he have a head? Something/someone showed up in my garden last night. With it camme about six thousand beer mats.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: gnu
Date: 01 Jul 10 - 01:03 PM

Couldna bin Shane, SINS. The only coaster he has ever used is a stolen skateboard.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jul 10 - 10:03 AM

No, when he was five years old (his intellect never progressed farther) he stole a bike with a coaster brake. Didn't know how to use it, so when he was going downhill on a gravel road too fast he tried pedaling backwards. Because he wouldn't go to the hospital the interfacing of his face and a hundred meters of gravel road gave him the facial features he has today (gravel still works it way out from under what passes for his skin).

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Ed T
Date: 02 Jul 10 - 10:37 AM

Remember this one:
http://www.trucknews.com/issues/story.aspx?aid=1000195224&type=Print%20Archives

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 02 Jul 10 - 11:11 AM

Is it a coincidence? Do you think Don and Shane found a stash and wanted to take a permanent drinking buddy/guard there who wouldn't insist on having his share?

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Ed T
Date: 02 Jul 10 - 11:49 AM

As to Ed McNally:

"A rich man is either a scoundrel or the heir of a scoundrel". Spanish proverb

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jul 10 - 12:47 PM

I think that the statue is the only thing left that will talk with Shame.

Subject: RE: BS: Don & Shane McBride in Calgary?
From: open mike
Date: 02 Jul 10 - 02:20 PM

maybe they will install this new computer widget
http://www.jumbojoke.com/liquidcooled_computer.html