A Topical Question

Subject: A Topical Question
From: Dave Sutherland
Date: 25 May 20 - 02:58 PM

Q What connects Little Musgrave and Dominic Cummings?

A Neither should have gone to Barnard Castle

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: GUEST
Date: 25 May 20 - 03:21 PM

"What is I am Lord Barnard's wife?
Lord Barnard's not at home
For he has gone to Durham town
To quarantine alone"

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 25 May 20 - 03:49 PM

From Barnard Castle, upriver via Middleton-inTeesdale, via tree-clad Kirkcarrion, into upper Teesdale (have your picnic on the hexagonal basalt rocks at Low Force waterfall), on to High Force and Langdon Beck...God's own country. I haven't been for 45 years. Last time we were there, we stayed at Langdon Beck youth hostel, and, next day, walked from there via Falcon Clints and Caldron Snout, up the Maize Beck to that amazing Pennine highlight, High Cup. Then down to Dufton youth hostel. What a day that was. If you run there tomorrow you might just catch the last of the spring gentians, the most beautiful blue in the world. But watch out for the infamous Widdybank bull!

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mr Red
Date: 26 May 20 - 03:39 AM

All these Cummings and Goings

Cue for the complete song.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mr Red
Date: 26 May 20 - 03:46 AM

I've seen it pointed-out that two lockdown breakers have received screeds on Twatter (whatever that is) and Cummings zero. Censorship & national security are not strange bedfellows, but how are Cummings' Goings - security? National I will give you. Disgrace more apt.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Jos
Date: 26 May 20 - 04:16 AM

"My eyes are dim
I cannot see
That lockdown rules
Apply to me.
I'll go
For a drive
With my fa-mi-ly ..."

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 26 May 20 - 08:18 AM

A toty Juniot minister has just resigned obver this fiasco - is there a verse in that somewhere, I wonder
Jim

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 26 May 20 - 08:29 PM

Rumour has it that he just wanted to get back to football refereeing, where the rules are SOOO much clearer!???
Or that he has his eye on being the next Tory leader in Scotland.........??????

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mr Red
Date: 27 May 20 - 03:58 AM

My conscious mind
says do not stay
I am resigned
I have resigned
from this cabinet
forthwith
today

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mrrzy
Date: 27 May 20 - 08:44 AM

Above the line, no?

I have (have) not (not)
Brought my mask with me!

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mrrzy
Date: 27 May 20 - 09:56 AM

Also, do you use sunscreen?

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Jos
Date: 27 May 20 - 03:11 PM

There are masks, masks
For everyone who asks
In the store,
In the store.
There are masks, masks
For all those intimate tasks
In the Cummings/Johnson store.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Jos
Date: 27 May 20 - 03:30 PM

There are tests, tests,
A hundred thousand tests
In the store,
In the store.
There are tests, tests,
At least according to est-
imates or it could be more.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Jos
Date: 27 May 20 - 04:38 PM

There are queues, queues,
Whichever shop you choose,
At the store,
At the store.
There are queues, queues -
I've heard it on The News -
At the supermarket store.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Jos
Date: 27 May 20 - 05:24 PM

[Alternative version of previous verse]


There are queues, queues,
Whichever shop you choose,
At the store,
At the store.
There are queues, long queues,
Social-isolating queues
At the supermarket store.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mr Red
Date: 27 May 20 - 05:47 PM

There's a smell, smell
One I cannot tell
At the store
At the store
There's a smell, smell
In my isolated hell
Not the supermarket store

My eyes are dim I cannot see
I have not brought my specs with me
I - have - not - brought - my - specs - with - me -
At Barnard Castle's supermarket store.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: Mrrzy
Date: 28 May 20 - 07:48 AM

Oh it's space space space
Don't get right in my face
Please stay home
Just stay home
Oh it's space space space
You need to go noplace
Order online from your home!

Definitely above the line.

Subject: RE: A Topical Question
From: weerover
Date: 28 May 20 - 08:40 AM

There's vaccine, vaccine
Nowhere to be seen...
And no visors, visors
Nor yet hand sanitizers...