Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Áine Date: 12 Feb 00 - 06:21 PM Well, I'm back again with another good one (or so me thinks). A rather special headline in today's paper caught my eye. It was situated over a story describing how, in these days of the 'Net, you no longer have to pull on your Justins, hitch up your Levis, place your Stetson on your head, or smell the sawdust and funk from the stockyard, to go to the cattle auction. That's right folks, you can bid on that bessie over the ethernet. The story described a "3-1/2 hour Web event, offering about 3,500 beef cattle to 36 competing bidders in seven states . . . confirm(ing) the next evolutionary cycle of livestock marketing." So, here's the headline for which you are challenged to write a song for: ONLINE BOVINE Go for it, CHALLENGE!RS . . . -- Áine |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Metchosin Date: 12 Feb 00 - 06:46 PM Gee Áine, how could we possibly come close to "Cows with Guns"? |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: katlaughing Date: 12 Feb 00 - 07:00 PM Cow With Guns? Sounds about fair to me. Just let them come at 'em with those prods! Armed and Dangerous Bovines, I love it! GO COWS!!!! |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Metchosin Date: 12 Feb 00 - 07:20 PM Cows with Guns click here Maybe after this auction, the next step is Bovine Online. |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: katlaughing Date: 12 Feb 00 - 08:09 PM LMAORWOTFWTTA! THANK YOU, THANK YOU!! Veggie-tarian that I am, I truly LOVE IT!! |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: GUEST,LEJ Date: 12 Feb 00 - 08:51 PM Ghost Riders on the Net
An old cowpoke was sittin' at his CPU one night
Yippie Ki Yay
All at once them cattle busted down that digital gate
Their horns was rippin' megabytes of Random Memory
Yippie Ki Yay
All at once the E-cowboys called to him through the screen
Yippie Ki Yay |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: katlaughing Date: 12 Feb 00 - 08:58 PM LEEJ!! Your brilliance knows no bounds!!! Bravo, bravo!! I stand in awe, darlin! |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Áine Date: 12 Feb 00 - 08:59 PM Yeeeeee-Haaaaaah!!! Way to go LEJ!! Fantastic!! -- Áine |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Metchosin Date: 12 Feb 00 - 09:29 PM Lej, ya did it! Yahoooo.com.....(keepin the thought in cyberspace there) |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Metchosin Date: 12 Feb 00 - 09:40 PM Jeez Lej, "You're mah hero. |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Amos Date: 13 Feb 00 - 12:23 AM Yippe kyiyiyi! LEJ has a pure-dee homer there (LMAO). You GO, LEJ! Amos.nuffnuffnuff!
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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Amos Date: 13 Feb 00 - 12:57 AM Fifteen Hops on a T1 Line< Tune -- Erie Canal I gotta cow named Sally Brine I've fattened her up with lovin' care
My Sal was destined for a can
He'd worked all night 'til awful late |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Áine Date: 13 Feb 00 - 10:18 AM Bravo, Amos!! Wonnerful, wonnerful, wonnerful!! My favorite line: "But he couldn't get Sal to demodulate" -- have you been hanging out on those 'kinky' threads again, my friend?? -- Áine |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Amos Date: 13 Feb 00 - 10:32 AM Well, when I was a young geek, no one ever tole me what that flat silvery electronic box was for, so I was left tomy own devices! A |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Amos Date: 13 Feb 00 - 10:39 AM Actually I have to disqualify myself from this challenge, for exceeding the margins of historical alteration defined in the Gaelic Goddess Handbook of Rules, Regulations and Conventions for the Management of Poets, Quarks and Other Strange Creations. The technical grounds being that neither bacon nor SPAM (as far as I know) are supported by cow parts. Therefore, I graciously defer to the clear winner, the giant in the lists, the man on the hormongous Clydesdale, Sir LEJ. So far, anyway. A |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Áine Date: 13 Feb 00 - 11:07 AM Dear Amos, I'm afraid that you can't disqualify yourself (at least, this time). You didn't read far enough in the GGHRRCMPQOSC. It states clearly in Section AZL.1.b.04., subsection (r)69: Whereas, if the subject of any song concerns the body parts of any four-legged animal that may be processed in any way wherein such processing the above-mentioned body parts cannot be duly envisaged by said poet, quark, or strange creation, then the said poet, quark, and/or strange creation may be imagined and be said to be included in any product of said body part processing and therefore said poet, quark and/or strange creation cannot be disqualified from the Mudcat Song Challenge! for cause, or not. So, there you go, dear Amos -- your still legal!! -- Áine |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: MMario Date: 13 Feb 00 - 11:26 AM I don't think ANY real animal gets used for SPAM, but beef bacon is incredible.....don't see it often. |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Amos Date: 13 Feb 00 - 11:41 AM Dang, you guys. Didn't know you spoke Legalese! I spent some time there in West Legal and took a few trips just south of Legal. But I never mastered the lingo. &agueAine, you never cease to amaze me! That and Gaelic -- I'm surprised you don't wake up with your tongue in a double bowline! But let's not go there.... A |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: The Shambles Date: 13 Feb 00 - 12:32 PM You know what they say. "One mans's meat is another man's SPAM". |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: GUEST,lonepine@jps.net Date: 13 Feb 00 - 01:01 PM I hope the cowboys discarded their cyber beercans into the cyber trash can, we want to leave the cyber prarie clean. |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: katlaughing Date: 13 Feb 00 - 03:06 PM Naw, they threw 'em in the cyber recycling bin!**BG** |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Áine Date: 14 Feb 00 - 08:13 AM SONG CHALLENGE! WINNERS for Part 6: Awarded the Golden Cow Chip with Shamrock Cluster:
Fifteen Hops On A T1 Line by Amos Congratulations, Buckaroos!!
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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Jack the Sailor Date: 16 Aug 01 - 02:40 PM Whoopie Ty Yi Yo eBAy your Doggies
I was surfing the world wide web for pleasure
Whoopie Ty Yi Yo, git yer doggies on eBay
Well I won't buy cattle uless I see 'em
Whoopie Ty Yi Yo, git yer doggies on eBay |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Aidan Crossey Date: 17 Aug 01 - 06:43 AM To the tune of Ghost Riders In The Sky ONLINE BOVINE I strolled down by The Shambles, it being a market day But the auctioneer was looking glum, and these sad words did say "There's no need for me, Paddy, my working days are o'er Online auctions mean that there's no call for me no more" CHORUS Boot the PC Hard disk whine Oooooonline Bovine "Chin up, Mister Auctioneer" I shook his proffered hand "You were the quickest speaker in the whole of Ireland But these young farmers nowadays are well into IT And so it seems the world has turned its back on you and me" CHORUS "No more the smell of cowshit, no more the dungarees Wellingtons and flattened caps, trousers without knees Belts made out of baling twine and pockets stuffed with cash The advent of the internet has caused our world to crash" CHORUS "Now its logging on to A-Moo-Zon, verify account, Click to view and click to bid, key in the amount, Confirm your credit details, transaction underway Data processed, deal is done, an e-mail's on its way" |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Jack the Sailor Date: 17 Aug 01 - 10:55 AM I feel obligated to award a silverplated civet dropping for
Boot the PC |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: Áine Date: 18 Aug 01 - 04:08 PM And another couple of winners . . . What I want to know is -- where is this Fountain of Creativity that you guys keep dipping in??? Hmmmmm? Come on, you can tell us, we'll keep the secret -- promise! ;-) So, dear Jack and derrymacash, move your ever growing collection of cow chip whatnots on the mantle over, 'cuz here come some more . . .
Winners of the Super Special Sandstone Sheila-Na-Gig Ocarina Award (The Super Special Sandstone Sheila-Na-Gig Ocarina Award is given to the Challenge!rs who warm the cockles and create a special warm and fuzzy feeling in the heart of the Keeper of the Book in a song): -- Áine |
Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 6 From: SharonA Date: 27 Aug 01 - 11:16 AM *refresh* Question: How come the logo says "ebaY" (capital Y) but the site's references to itself say "eBay" (capital B)??? Go figure.... YIPPEE-YI-YO-EBAY (Tune: "I'm an Old Cowhand" by Johnny Mercer) I'm a cattleman up in Maryland But I never rode bulls or learned to brand. I'm a stockman who never stocked a cow, Never bought a steer, but I plan to now 'Cause the online auction has shown me how! Yippee-yi-yo-eBay! Yippee-yi-yo-eBay! I'm a cattleman up in Maryland, Surf the web world wide with my mouse in hand. I'm no John Wayne cowboy — I'm up-to-date, Catalogued each cow in the Lone Star State On a spreadsheet in Windows 98! Yippee-yi-yo-eBay! Yippee-yi-yo-eBay! My PC's upgraded; it ain't so slow So I sent my bids, didn't bid too low. Now a thousand head to my yard will go! Yippee-yi-yo-eBay! Yippee-yi-yo-eBay! |
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