Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)

Subject: crabs walk sideways and lobsters walkstraight
From:
Date: 20 Jun 97 - 06:58 PM

This is an old and maybe lost Smothers Bros political song. Any of the words would be helpful. All I can remember is Crabs walk sideways and lobsters walk straight, and they wont let me take her for my mate" Thanks

Subject: RE: crabs walk sideways and lobsters walkstraight
From: katlaughing
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 12:21 AM

A little late, but I did find this was on their 1964 LP, "It Must Have Been Something I Said" (Mercury 20904).

Subject: RE: crabs walk sideways and lobsters walkstraight
From: open mike
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 12:42 AM

i should think that lobsters, like their little cousins the Crawdads
(cray fish) would scurry backwards! i guess they do go straight back though!

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: breezy
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 07:33 AM

I told you so,
you got crabs.

Subject: Lyr Add: CRABS WALK SIDEWAYS (from Smothers Bros.)
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 12:09 PM

CRABS WALK SIDEWAYS

Herman met Sally on the beach one night.
The sea was calm and the starfish were bright.
She looked at him and he looked at her,
And it was true love at first sight.

Well, Herman told his folks about the girl that he found.
They said, "Herman, there must be other girls around.
'Cause crabs walk sideways, lobsters walk straight,
And we won't let you take her for your mate."

CHORUS: Crabs walk sideways and lobsters walk straight,
And you can't take a crab for your mate.

Well, Herman told his Sally and it broke her heart.
She loved that lobster right from the start.
He took her in his claws and said "I'll always be yours,
But still, dear, we'll have to part." CHORUS

She said, "Let me talk to your mom and dad.
I'll show them crabs really aren't that bad."
But they turned her away: "What will the neighbors say?"
And they laughed at the funny walk she had. CHORUS

Then one day on the sandbar what did Herman see,
But his little ol' Sally walking straight as can be.
He said, "Sweetheart, now they'll take you in the family!"
She said, "Herman, don't you shweetheart me! Hic!" CHORUS
------------
I recall a spoken passage where Herman is criticized for his cowardice, but "...being a lobster, Herman had no backbone."

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstra
From: katlaughing
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 02:15 PM

Brava, leeneia!! Thanks!

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstra
From: Allan C.
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 02:40 PM

Why is it that whenever I read that title, I want to sing, "Some humptyback camels and some chimpanzees..." Are the tunes similar?

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 02:43 PM

We won't tell him the REAL reason is he has a dirty mind

speaking of tunes - anyone got it?

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: GUEST,Eli
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 02:24 PM

Who wrote this song?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 28 Jul 06 - 01:44 AM

refresh

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)
From: GUEST,Pete
Date: 28 Jul 06 - 02:47 AM

Is it crabs or lobsters that walk sideways?
Crabs.
In that case I think I've got lobsters.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)
From: Peace
Date: 28 Jul 06 - 02:51 AM

You have my deepest sympathies.

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: GUEST,brownrecluse62
Date: 09 Jan 07 - 07:46 PM

In the Smothers' recording, Tom speaks after the first repetition of the chorus:

Poor Herman and poor Sally. Whence did their love whence wrong? Oh the bittersweet pain of love's nectar. Yes, Herman, though he loved Sally, could not marry her, could not have her for his own. Herman was a lobster, Sally was a crab. Herman lived in a restricted neighborhood. So he had to make a decision. And Herman made a decision which was sad and very hard for him to do, but then, being a lobster, Herman had no backbone.

Wow, this seems a few months late, but what the hell.

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: jeffp
Date: 09 Jan 07 - 08:40 PM

It's never too late to complete songs or add information about them. It will help somebody sometime. Thanks for adding that!

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: Muttley
Date: 09 Jan 07 - 08:41 PM

The lobster and the crab were deeply in love until one day she sobbingly confessed that she was a Princess and that her father, the king of the western lobster nation had arranged her marriage to a Prince from the eastern reefs.
"Daddy says we must part and never see one another again. He says you are too lowly for us; you are but a crab and you walk - - - - - - - - - - SIDEways!"

Sobbing hysterically, the Princess swam away.

The day of the wedding dawned and lobsters from all over arrived at the cathedral, which was packed.

Just as the Cardinal fish was proposing the questio: Does anyone have an objection as to why this couple should NOT bejoined in Holy Matrimony". the doors burst open - - - - it was Crab!

He stalked in and eyed the congregation menacingly, swaying ever so slightly.
He then marched slowly, but puposefully up the aisle toward the bridal couple.
Suddenly everyone in the cathedral drew in their collective breath in an astonished gasp of shock - - - - the crab was walking straight ahead - - FORWARDS.

He reached the dais, looking up at the love of his eyes. Glared at the incipient groom and turned to glare balefully at the king himself.

He took a srep forward and, looking the the king straight in the eye he said - - - - - - God, I'm pissed!!!

Sorry. I signed off before sending this one but just HAD to come back with it.

Muttley

Maybe this will redeem me

I LOBSTER and   NEVER FLOUNDER

I was the cook. She was the waitress.
Down at Harpoon Harry's Fish Cafe
And somewhere between the Clam juice;
And the Seaweed Salad,
That little Shrimp just - - lured her away.

CHORUS:
Oh I Lobster and never Flounder
He wrapped his line around her and they drove off in his Carp
Oh I Lobster and never Flounder
I Octopus his face in; Eel only break her heart

I said "Just Squid an leave me for that piano Tuna
If you wanna Trout someone new
She was the Bass I ever had, no my life has no Porpoise
Oh my Cod, I love her, yes I do

CHORUS

I Oyster love that girl: She was pretty as Marlin Monroe
But now I'm Whalin' out this Tailer roe
That little Shrimp just Flathead her and lured her away
An I'm Whiting to see if Shell return or no

CHORUS

The tears come to my eye: They fillet to the Bream
Each time I Mullet over in my head
I'm in a stse of Shark and feelin blue-bottle*in my hand
Well I'm so fin it's a Mackerel I'm not dead

CHORUS



*Bluebottle - venomous sea jelly known colloquially as a bluebottle in Australia: elsewhere known as the Portuguese Man o' War

Mutt

Subject: RE: LYR RE crabs walk sideways & lobsters walkstraight
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 11 Jan 07 - 12:09 AM

The BMI Repertoire says CRABS WALK SIDEWAYS was written by Jeff Barry and Arthur Resnick.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (and Lobsters Wal
From: GUEST,Zardoz
Date: 01 Dec 07 - 12:09 AM

Well about a year has passed on this thread BUT.... I had to add this....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCZEB15K6gY

Hope someone sees it.

P~

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (and Lobsters Walk...
From: oldhippie
Date: 01 Dec 07 - 09:26 PM

Lobster And Never Flounder is on Jim Haynes CD Words of WIsdom.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (and Lobsters Walk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 02 Dec 07 - 06:21 PM

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=lCZEB15K6gY
Youtube

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (and Lobsters Walk...
From: SINSULL
Date: 02 Dec 07 - 08:41 PM

How wonderful to see "Have A Cup Of Tea With Rosie" on a different clip. Remember her first appearance? They pulled her from the audience and she went on and on about how she loved to watch their show when the horizontal went out and the pictured flipped up and up and up.TVs did that in the 60s.
"Knead you bread, ladies. Your bread needs you."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)
From: GUEST,Tameware
Date: 28 May 09 - 11:44 PM

The last line is:

> She said, "Herman, don't you shweetheart me! Hic!"

It always gets a big laugh. I haven't quite been able to figure out why. Can anyone help me out?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)
From: open mike
Date: 29 May 09 - 12:32 AM

apparently her walking has been affected by alcohol..
instead of weaving when drunk, she went forward instead of sidewards.
that's how i interpret it, anyway.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Crabs Walk Sideways (Smothers Brothers)
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 29 May 09 - 12:10 PM

Stop in at Remick Ridge Vineyards winery in Kenwood, just north of San Francisco in Sonoma County. It is owned by Tom. Both Tom and Dick have been in the wine business for years, as was the late Pat Paulsen (for those who remember the old Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour). You can taste some really good wine and, possibly, get some more insight on these lyrics and others. I marketed wine for both Dick and Pat in the past. They may be comedians, but they are very serious about their wine. My only other connection to them is that all of us performed at the old Purple Onion many years ago - they fared much better.