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Feeling low after the high
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 26 Jun 00 - 08:32 PM Yes, LEJ, that is the one, the multi storied old hotel that was built by Fred Willson, the architect that layed out the town and built many of the mansions, schools, and other buildings (like the Baxter) that are on the register of historic places. The carved wooden heads are the monk's faces reproduced from a place that is in Bavaria (? I think). Anyway, Gary Cooper used to live here, went to high school in Bozeman, and he used to hang out with his pals, Hollywood and locals, at the Robin Bar in the Baxter, which had a cool art deco design. There was a ceiling of blue glass with moon and stars etched in it and backlit above the bar.... the new owners tore the Robin out and remodeled. I didn't think they could get away with that in a historic building. The Baccus Pub with all the monk's heads and painted beams in the ceiling is still preserved. Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Lonesome EJ Date: 26 Jun 00 - 03:50 PM Alice...the Baxter Hotel. Is that the one downtown with all the heads in the woodwork? Quite a place. I actually felt quite invigorated by Allan and Bill's visit. I was able to share a hug,a tune and a smile with several new friends, some of whom are local and will continue to be available for music and camaraderie. I also was inspired to get to work on my guitar playing, and I've been busy building up fingertip calluses and downloading guitar tablature. Bigger and better things are still to come, Alice, even Wyo's bus tour is a possibility. To the Future!!! LEJ |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 26 Jun 00 - 01:42 PM Yes, GUEST, I had a better week as I focused on work, and I had a Great session until 11pm last night with the group that meets here. I can't believe they were so shy in front of Bill and Allan. We were Hot last night! Mouth of the Tobique, Caliope House, lots of fast tunes, slow airs, ballads, shantys...two fiddlers, hammered dulcimer, banjo, guitars, flute, drums, accordion, and singers. It was great. Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST Date: 26 Jun 00 - 01:00 PM Suffice it to say it's a relief no offense was taken. None was intended. Not that it's worth anything, but I hope that after the weekend, things are looking up for you. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: dwditty Date: 26 Jun 00 - 11:50 AM Hi Alice, I guess we now know what utter isolation feels like. You're right. I do feel much better. The 'Cat Came Back. dw |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 26 Jun 00 - 10:54 AM Well, now, is anyone feeling the opposite - "high" (glad to have Mudcat back) "after the low" (forum down for over 2 days)? |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Big Mick Date: 23 Jun 00 - 12:34 PM Good. I am relieved that I had misinterpreted that remark and that you really were trying to be supportive and show empathy. I stand corrected and will look forward to other posts by you. All the best, Big Mick |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 23 Jun 00 - 12:14 PM Hi, GUEST, if you are still here, I think I understand what you meant by your message. My response to dw was in relation to still being a part of this Mudcat community, which I joined in 1997, and from which I more recently took a break. No offense taken by your comment. I have long time forum friends here who know me well through discussions over the years and they know I am strong "internally". Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST Date: 23 Jun 00 - 12:11 PM Fascinating...to plumb the depths of misinterpretation to which this imperfect communicating device is vulnerable. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Big Mick Date: 23 Jun 00 - 11:49 AM Guest, Because we are imperfect creatures cursed or blessed, depending on our circumstance, with the ability to ponder. And how we judge, the tests we apply, are determined by a myriad of influences, not the least of which are our current and near recent experiences. It is helpful when other caring creatures, such as Mudcatters, who care about us enough to empathize and sympathize, reach out with the love and acceptance of community and attempt to help us over the humps. No one is an island. Despite silly rhetoric to the contrary, everyone needs the validation of those around them. Thank God, because that is why we have performers. Sure we have to be comfortable in our own skin, and Alice is all of that. The best among us know when to reach out for it. And every so often that someone is a person like Alice who has demonstrated such admirable qualities, and whom has shared her love and knowledge with us all so many times. Other times people reach out in a negative way, and make unfortunate comments like yours which IMHO are attempts to make themselves feel better at someone elses expense. You see, Alice has not said a word about anyone else. She just reached out to friends who care about her and shared a feeling of hers. You, on the other hand, felt compelled to point out what was wrong with that. I hope I am wrong and only misunderstood, but the fact that you logged in under GUEST leads me to believe that you meant what I read into your comment. I will ask you one favor, GUEST, and I hope you will honor it. Please do not respond to this. Please. Just let this alone, and let friends chat among themselves. Stay with the music threads. We will all be happy to help you there, and look forward to getting assistance from you. Thanks, Big Mick |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: WyoWoman Date: 23 Jun 00 - 11:44 AM Uh, because we're human beans, not green beans, and therefore social animals who need the validation of others because part of who we are is shaped by our relationships to other human beans? Just a guess... ww |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST Date: 23 Jun 00 - 10:32 AM ("You are so much a part of this community," WOW, dw, I must say that is exactly the validation I was needing.)--said Alice way up there in the postings.... Why is it that we look for validation from without, when all the validation we need comes from within?
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: SINSULL Date: 23 Jun 00 - 08:35 AM Puppies and kittens, all snuggled together in a heap. Big smile. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST Date: 23 Jun 00 - 08:17 AM Or remember this..."when the going gets tough, the tough go shopping..." |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Naemanson Date: 23 Jun 00 - 08:15 AM There is an old saying, best expressed by Spider Robinson in his series of books about Callahan's Bar, that describes what is going on here. Pain shared is halved, joy shared is doubled. I haven't seen it mentioned by name here yet but it is definitely what is happening. Alice I got your message and sent a return. Thanks for the welcome. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST Date: 23 Jun 00 - 08:15 AM Think of a baby's smile...then you'll notice you're smiling too... |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 11:59 PM Thanks, everyone. I've sung "Troubled In Mind" through a few times and put it on tape. (there, I feel better) Maybe I'll send it to Max for the Radio. He was asking for some "blue" notes, and that is about as bluesy as I get. Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: zonahobo Date: 22 Jun 00 - 11:52 PM Say Alice... you've connected with me on a couple of my postings and being a mudcat newbie, it's been appreciated. I still feel a little funny sending a personal note on a forum but I guess when it is a compliment it's fine if it is shared and viewed widely. Good luck with your illustrative work. I don't think there are too many mudcatters here in Arizona but I've started to spread the word to a few friends out here. Guess we'll just have to start a Western chapter!! Dave Smith 'zonahobo' |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST,Grubby Date: 22 Jun 00 - 10:36 PM Hang in there Alice. It's a shocker of a feeling that post festival blues. It's a mind thing isn't it.We have a great four or five days of music and fun all our on going daily problems go out the door for that brief period, we even become a bit radical for a few days. When it's over we have to leave the music and the friends we have met behind and head back to real life once again. It doesn't go away does it real life I mean and it's a natural process that we go through wishing the good times could last a bit longer. Eighteen months ago I toured UK Ireland and Canada for six months, boy! has that made me restless, only now am I starting accept that I am where I am and get on with it. I use it as a positive now and plan my next trip which gives me a lift. But Iv'e got to say the memories are strong and the bug has bit, don't know how long I can hold out before I take off. As the old song goes "I've laid around and stayed around this old town to long" Alice my final comment is this, it's a bit like a bad gig, most of us have been through them, all you can say to yourself "This too will pass" Regards Grubby (as a guest today from another site) |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST,Grubby Date: 22 Jun 00 - 10:18 PM |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 10:04 PM SINSULL, is that anything like Charlie on the MTA? Bill and Allan on the Mudcat road trip... it just keeps going around, and around (sorry, Lorna). The Minstrel, the peddler of songs and that guy sharing a grape soda in North Dakota.... well, you know who you are.
Naemanson, I'm sending you a personal Mudcat message. Watch for it (it's about coffee). Thanks for coming out of the lurking mode. Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Mbo Date: 22 Jun 00 - 10:01 PM Hmmm...Bozeman is where Star Trek writer Brannon Braga is from...he named the starship stuck in the temporal loop in "Cause & Effect" Bozeman as homage to his home town! --Mbo |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 09:35 PM {{{hug to bbc}}}
dwditty, I was just thinking about the intro song I sent to Max way back when M-Radio started, "Come All You Loyal Mudcats". It was about Spaw being in the hospital and how we were pulling together for him. It was a bit of a dirge sounding slow pace (sorry, Catspaw) but it was a sad and scary time that we were in the midst of when it was written. By the way, Catspaw, Allan has a special surprise for you from something that exists in Bozeman.... you'll never guess. alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 09:29 PM KC-WW, you mean like Pinky And The Brain (What we do every night, Pinky, TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!) love it - a. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: WyoWoman Date: 22 Jun 00 - 09:15 PM Hey there, Alice -- I've finally gotten my computer plugged in after moving lock, stock and barrel to southern Colorado. I'm sitting here in this new town where I don't know a soul, waiting for checks to arrive that haven't, trying to keep my faith in myself and the decision I made, not knowing how it's all going to turn out, and very much mindful of the friends I made music with back in Wyoming and the absolutely perfect night we had while Bill and Allan were in Colorado. My tactic to fight the blues is to start planning the Mudcat World Domination Tour, Part Deux, in which a band of us North American types meet up and invade the U.K. next summer, forcing Bill Sables to make good on his promise to take us around to the music folks HE knows. If we can get enough of us enrolled in the idea, we can charter an airplane, then charter buses and stumble through the U.K. in our flowerdy blouses, shorts and sandals-with-dress-socks, taking snapshots of completely unimportant landmarks and causing Mr. Sables to rip out that fine head of hair of his when he finally tires of trying to shepherd such an impossible gathering. Any volunteers for tour-bus drivers? Chin up, Ms. Alice. Cheery-oh. WW |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: dwditty Date: 22 Jun 00 - 09:11 PM Bill Sables & I were talking just the other night about how the Mudcat as we know started when Big Mick posted of Spaw's illness. I will never forget what happened inside of me during that time. I am sure that the same thing happened to many others - simultaneously - and it was that that changed the Mudcat forever - from a community of people interested in music to a group of music people interested in community. dw |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: bbc Date: 22 Jun 00 - 09:09 PM Yes, Alice, all of us who've met in person have noticed that it is just like a continued conversation. And, generally, we've found that we liked each other in person even better than online. Hope you & I will one day have the chance to meet & hug! love, bbc |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 09:01 PM Lightening has passed and I can finish my thought.
I think the difference between leaving my local friends after a group music session and saying goodbye after the music with my first Mudcat visitors, Allan, Bill, and Les B, is that we have been in touch for a long time on almost a daily basis on the Mudcat. Bill said it last night on the Radio Show, Mudcat is what has made the difference. Even if we are not sending messages directly to each other, we are "plugged into" the discussion so we can relate to each other about topics and people. I recall when Spaw was in the hospital and how we who had never met except through the Mudcat felt really connected to him and what was happening to him and his family.
The Mudcat seemed to really take a turn toward community at that point. Until then we had the folk music connection, which was great, but life and death created a new perspective on how I and many others related to each other on the Mudcat. For several years now, I have checked into the Mudcat discussions on almost a daily basis. I have shared more here than I do with the other musicians in my town. I think the illusion of never meeting in person allowed more open communication in some ways, more hesitation because of the internet vulnerability in other ways. Typing into the forum at any time of the day or night allowed access to communication more readily than what I have had in person here with people whom I see a few times a month.
I am used to logging on every morning to check Mudcat, and rarely has a day gone by that I didn't at least read some threads. I realized when I first met Les B and then Bill and Allan that we could talk to each other in Mudcat "cult jargon" that related to the different personalities on the forum. Being a loner, not a joiner, I was very wary of the clique phenomenon, so I have consciously observed this clannishness. I have to say that now I see it as a very positive development. The interaction among Mudcat members is good. This connectedness has been a positive addition to my life, and I'm thankful that we have developed into this close knit community.
Thanks, everybody. Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: dwditty Date: 22 Jun 00 - 08:47 PM Hi Alice, You are probably signed off now waiting out the storm. As Banjo Bonnie just said, the front will clear the air and provide sun you need to lift your spirits. Once again, I think you have stirred an emotion that has hit many of us as "the boys" have continued on their way - we just didn't realize what that feeling was until you pointed it out. So, you see, you *are* important here. I will continue to wait for my "thunderstorm" to refresh me, too. dw |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Little Neophyte Date: 22 Jun 00 - 08:34 PM Alice I can relate very much to what you are feeling. What I do when I feel great loss is remind myself that I am like a mountain and feelings are like weather systems that come and go. I just hold on tight until the feelings pass knowing there will be sunshine and warmth when the winds change. But in the meantime it is a wonderful feeling to know this place does exists where you will find comfort and friendship from people who really do care about you. Bonnie |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Sorcha Date: 22 Jun 00 - 07:30 PM What everybody said, Alice. And Me Too, or Three, or Four.....Put up the roadblock NOW! Somebody should do this every summer. Who's next? And kat, for your Mudcat Place, I think we will have to be retired. Can't imagine needing PO-lice in a place like that. Guess I will just have to mind the garden and cook to earn my keep. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 07:05 PM "like a tea tray in the sky?" curiouser.
I have to type this fast, lightening storm moving closer. As I was working this afternoon, I thought of this thread. I recall Allan and I having a talk about this subject the evening before they left. I have been to folk gatherings with friends from our session here, yearly campouts up in the mountains, and I had never felt emotional at the end of the. Allan shared with me how hard it was to leave a group of Mudcatters he had spent time playing music with to drive back home. Being stoical most of the time, I didn't get what he was talking about at first. I got it the next day, as I tried to hold back tears while they left my house to hit the road again.
Maybe there is a song challenge here... After the Gathering Breakdown, or the Folk Festival Fallout, or Post Gig Blues.... gotta go, need to unplug the computer. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: GUEST Date: 22 Jun 00 - 05:43 PM Sinsull! I don't know what you mean! Alice, would you like the polished silver tray or the cherry and walnut tray? |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jun 00 - 04:44 PM UUUUHHH Naemanson, Allen is supposd to make the coffee. Kat says it has something to do with his being sexy. Woder if he serves it on a bed tray? |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Naemanson Date: 22 Jun 00 - 03:39 PM OK Alice, I'm "virtually" there! I'll fix the coffee, you start the music. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: SINSULL Date: 22 Jun 00 - 03:23 PM And we can create an underground railroad shipping them from town to town. We'll feed them well, keep them clean and provide decent housing as long as they continue to sing and play. People will tie yellow ribbons around trees and demand their release but we'll hold off and let the glory of their rescue fall upon Catspaw the day after he is inaugerated. I've seen this somewhere before... Wish I could be at annap's, wet basement and all. Don't want to lock them in a wet basement though. Sorry for the babble. SS |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Jon Freeman Date: 22 Jun 00 - 03:19 PM Yes, Alice, I'm sure most of use have seen that sort of thing happen to festivals, sessions and folk clubs. I think it is nice though to remember being part of these things in the good times and sooner or later, something else good crops up. I reckon you should think along a similar line with you current experiece, you had a great time, to come down afterwards is natuaral but you will have more encounters to look forward to in the future and I hope you enjoy every minute of them. Jon |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: MMario Date: 22 Jun 00 - 03:11 PM If we put a roadblock across their path after oldsongs, they'll have to retrace their entire route in reverse, right? |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Bert Date: 22 Jun 00 - 03:03 PM I know! let's tell Bill & Allan that they have got to do the trip all over again! OK, you ready for it Guys? We'll chip in a buck or two for gas. Cheer up Alice! We love you. Bert. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:57 PM Jon, your story reminds me of how things change with friendships, sessions, and such. Since the old Baxter hotel, the home of our Sunday "Irish" session, was bought by new owners last fall, it has never been the same. They actually threw out the Tuesday night bluegrass/old time session, telling them they could no longer meet there. That session has just found a new home a few doors down at a coffee shop, but the space is not as ideal acoustically, etc. It will never be the same. Time marches on, the only thing we can count on is change.
... going with the flow Alice |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Jon Freeman Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:50 PM Life between the festivals I hope. I have seen a lot mentioned here about Mudcatters, people who at least know one another in cyber land but it can happen in other ways. I'll giv the old Conwy Street Festival which lasted a week as an exapmle. You'd go there, wander round a bit, meet somebody you hadn't seen since last years get hugs and kisses, gradually meet more old faces, and new faces and before you know it a "family" was formed on the quay, some would be people selling jewelry or other bits, some there for the fun, sometimes one of the paid acts would join us but most of our "family" could do something - juggle sing, play or whatever. Everybody trusted everybody, eg a trader would ask me to look after his stall for a while or I would leave my instruments with someone I'd not met before... I've been know to play out there until day break with a few still enjoying themselves... Then the week after, it's all gone (though you might meet some of the faces elsewhere). Sadly, the Conwy Festival has now gone (funding problems) and in the last of these type gatherings I went to on Conwy Quay (North Wales Blue Grass Festivals not the street festival) thefts did occur but we had some great times prior to that. I wish I could bring those days back - it was well worth the depression afterwards. Jon |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:37 PM Hey, Naemanson, how about a latte, then a virtual tango with me? Broken hearts become the biggest kind. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:33 PM por seguro, tango!! tango through my tears, thanks, guys, that was touching... on goes the high, low, high, low (good, bad, good, bad... Harry Nilsson) |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Naemanson Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:30 PM What the hell, I might as well say something. I've been lurking for months playing the voyeur but I guess I can add my two cents worth (if it has that much value). Earlier this year my girlfriend left me. That was hard enough but we were running a coffeehouse together. I tried to work with her on it and made it through one evening. I was depressed for days afterwards. I tried again the following month and only made it half way through the evening. It was too hard to be in the same room with her. The point I'm trying to make here, Alice, is I went through a crushing period of withdrawal and loss. I had lost not only my girlfriend but my coffeehouse. Friends rallied 'round me and kept me going. My house blossomed with music. I visited friends' homes to keep my spirits up, especially on coffeehouse night. But I found the way to get over all of that. I'm starting my own coffeehouse in a neighboring town. I'm timing it to avoid conflicts with "hers" and she and I talk enough to make sure we don't step on each others toes. I haven't found a girlfriend yet but I am back in the swing of things. So you keep going to those sessions, keep talking, singing, and playing with others (both in the real world and here) and continue to enjoy life. There is life after fesitvals. (Or should I say between festivals?) Enjoy! |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: catspaw49 Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:24 PM Aw ferchrissakes Alice........if that's all it was, why didn't you just ask for a tango or something? Whip out the long black gloves, grab a rose and we're off! Seriously, fine post dw!! Excellent insight. And Alice, you're right.......We do have a lot of new folks and no, they don't know all of us or our history here......But rest assured, many do and many are learning and perhaps in reading threads like these, they get to know some of that history.......and then create more. I don't think I'm the one to say it best, but you are and always will be a part of this community. Whether its a good song, a good discussion, or a good fight, I know that you, if you're around, will be in the fray. Your recent contributions alone should introduce you to a lot of folks who may just have come on board.....Thanks for all the work on the photos. You sound much better after dw's post so cheer up, eat some chocolate, and let's tango! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Big Mick Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:23 PM I understand this completely. Imagine being in a sing/playaround with 35 or so Muddies. That is what the FSGW Getaway was like last year. And after it was over, there was a letdown. For those able to get to it this year, do not miss the opportunity. I have been saying for several years that we are a community, a village, filled with some of the finest around. This tour proves it. Dear Alice, one of the things I love about you is that you don't even realize how big a part of all this you are. It seems like the finest never realize that they are such. You have inspired many of us with your stories of raising that lucky (to have you for a Mom) young man and maintaining your independence. You have friends here, many of them. This thread will prove that before it runs dry. All the very best, Big Mick |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:07 PM "You are so much a part of this community," WOW, dw, I must say that is exactly the validation I was needing. Thank you. Since I haven't posted as much as I used to, and in the midst of so many newbies who don't know me and my Mudcat history, I was feeling like a "nonperson", kind of that invisibility I was talking about.
You made my day. Alice Flynn in Montana |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: dwditty Date: 22 Jun 00 - 02:01 PM Alice,
I'm with you. For all the time I've spent on the Mudcat (almost 3 years), Tuesday night was my first physical contact with other mudders. And just like when I visit a great place on vacation, or spend the weekend on a deeply spiritual retreat, or host close friends/family for a visit, I want to hold on to that experience-to transport myself from my current life to the fantasy of the perfection that existed in those experiences. Intellectually I know that even if I could jump into that other world, it would soon lose the luster of newness and become my day-to-day existence. Then I would be left to dream of the perfect life somewhere else. The old grass is greener routine. |
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: Alice Date: 22 Jun 00 - 01:25 PM Mbo in middle age.... now, that's a picture.
spaw, I was remembering those discussions, too. Helen, I think, had quite the plan for Oz.
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Subject: RE: Feeling low after the high From: catspaw49 Date: 22 Jun 00 - 01:17 PM Hey Sisnsull....You need to go back and read some of the old trreads about Mudcat retirement villages and Ol Folkies Homes that we ran.......Some funny stuff. Spaw |
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