Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies

Subject: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Jon W.
Date: 29 Sep 97 - 11:09 AM

I don't dare desecrate the original "Rose" thread with this, but the folk process has begun:

I took some Scouts camping this weekend, and one suggested that Elton John should have used these words, to the tune of "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road"

Goodbye England's Rose
Now you can decompose
You can't keep her in a coffin
She's going out on her own (alt. She's leaking out on the stones

Any others?

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: lesblank
Date: 29 Sep 97 - 11:28 AM

Folk process or not, that's sick !! But oh so typical !! What was your contribution to this "parody" ?

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Jon W.
Date: 29 Sep 97 - 12:02 PM

I confess to only the alt. last line, the rest was from the scout's own sick little mind. Except that I had previously told this joke which probably planted a seed:

As you know, Beethoven was completely deaf when he composed his last symphony. After he had been buried for several years, some scientists decided to exhume the body to find out the cause of deafness. But when they opened the coffin, the corpse was there with a sheet of music and an eraser, erasing all the notes. When they asked what he was doing, Beethoven replied "Oh, just decomposing."

After the scout came out with the song, we had a little discussion on how disasters, deaths of public figures, etc. often spark jokes, song parodies, etc. For instance:

Why did NASA choose Sprite as their official soft drink?
Because they couldn't get 7-UP
(told after the Challenger disaster)

Hey, guess who quit smoking?
Who?
Ted Bundy
(told a few weeks after his electrocution)

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Bert
Date: 29 Sep 97 - 12:24 PM

Of course with a name like "Di" it was only a matter of time....

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: lesblank
Date: 29 Sep 97 - 05:49 PM

Scouting and campfires definitely have NOT changed in the 50 years since I joined. !!!

And that Beethoven joke stinks !! (Literally!!)

Hope to see you in the chat room, if I can elude that dreaded Null who keeps pointing at me.

Les

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Earl
Date: 30 Sep 97 - 12:16 AM

I have a friend who wrote a parody called "Like a Blow Torch in the Ritz." As long as this thread is here anyway, I'll get the lyrics.

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Helen
Date: 30 Sep 97 - 02:42 AM

I heard the Beethoven joke slightly differently:

Someone walked past Beethoven's grave and heard weird music coming from it. It sounded like music being played backwards, but the cemetery worker nearby said "Don't worry, it's just Beethoven decomposing"

Which, by some strange logic even I can't figure out, brings me to my other favourite death-of-a-famous-person joke:

Q: How do you fit the Beatles and their insturments into a Mini Minor car?

A: George & Paul in the front with their guitars, Ringo in the back with his drums, and John in the ashtray.

Apologies now, before *I* get flamed and interred unceremoniously into my own ashtray ;-> Helen

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Jon W.
Date: 30 Sep 97 - 11:11 AM

Helen, thanks for illustrating my point. And Les, I can't get passed the Null Troll either. I guess we'll just have to stand on this side of the bridge and chat.

The rest of you, come on, cough up your parodies.

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Jon W.
Date: 30 Sep 97 - 11:18 AM

Okay I'll take another turn. This one isn't about Princess Di, but since Helen mentioned it and I vaguely recall Elton John singing a song about John Lennon, I thought this would fit just as well. You'll just have to "imagine" the tune:

Imagine you're John Lennon
It isn't hard to do
Millions of fans adore you
You're making millions too
And then you see John Lennon
Coming through the door
You-ooh oooh un
Imagine you're John Lennon,
And you kill John Lennon with a gun

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Peter T.
Date: 30 Sep 97 - 12:11 PM

Just to rescue this from the gruesome. In the spirit of "Her Majesty" (the Beatles)...

Goodbye, England's Queen,
Though the knives are all out for you
You had the grace to hold yourself
and helped to win the war.
Goodbye England's Queen,
This is the thanks you get
for fifty years of decency
And doing of your best.

And it seems to me
you lived your life
like a queen upon the throne
Smiling and shaking hands
and working like a drone
And through innumerable openings
and charity bazaars
You acted like a proper bird
and bit your regal tongue

And it seems to me you have the right
To tell them to get stuffed
All those parasitical frauds
who want to see you fail
whose idea of emotion is a photogenic wail
Oh, well, at least you can now eat at the Ritz
sans paparazzi on your tail!!
Goodbye England's Queen
though your face is on the coins
please have the grace to never change
like a stuffy Windsor chair!!

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Caolainn
Date: 10 Oct 97 - 02:46 PM

Peter,

I loved that last one. It's just what Elizabeth II needs.

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Caolainn
Date: 10 Oct 97 - 02:49 PM

By the way did anyone else notice how Goodybye England's Rose sounds remarkably like A Candle in the Wind?

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Peter T.
Date: 10 Oct 97 - 07:23 PM

Dear Caolainn, well, yes. Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones referred to it in an unguarded interview as " The Song For Dead Blondes" and is now in a war of words with Elton John, who described Richards in turn as pathetic, and that he should have been dropped from the Stones years ago. This put something of a damper on Reg's big day, when he was given the key to the city of Watford. Yours, Peter

Subject: RE: Goodbye England's Rose Part II - The Parodies
From: Holly
Date: 18 Oct 97 - 11:30 PM

>Earl Date: 30-Sep-97 - 12:16 AM

I have a friend who wrote a parody called "Like a Blow Torch in the Ritz." As long as this thread is here anyway... lyrics.

Earl: can you send in the words, as you offered? I'd be most grateful. Best, Holly