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BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 14 Aug 04 - 10:43 AM Limbless woman sues over air ban A LIMBLESS woman was referred to as "one head, one bottom and one torso" by an airline employee who barred her from a flight, it was claimed today. Adele Price, 42, of Mansfield, Notts, who was born with birth defects caused by thalidomide, is suing Air France in New York, saying an employee told her she could not board a flight from the UK because she had no arms and legs. At a press conference, she claimed the staff member told her "one head, one bottom and one torso cannot and will not be allowed to fly on Air France" without help. She claims she suffered psychological damage and incurred large expenses on the trip from Manchester to New York on August 19, 2000. She had to pay someone to accompany her on the flight, she said. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Wolfgang Date: 17 Jun 04 - 02:14 PM Indian Guru Ananda Swami has died in a rain making ceremony. He has called his followers to bury him in sand for two days. When they dug him out he was suffocated. Wolfgang |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 01 Feb 04 - 11:26 PM Swedes told to beware drunk and disorderly elks Swedish authorities are warning citizens to be on the look out for berry-intoxicated elks. It follows an attack on a woman in the city of Karlshamn. Experts say the animals are likely to get even more aggressive as they feast on the last of the summer berries which have fermented into potent alcoholic fruit. Paul Stamberg from Krisitiansand in Norway, who is encountering the same problem, said: "Some elks get very calm but others very aggressive after they've had alcoholic fruit, just like humans." Story filed: 10:59 Friday 28th November 2003 A little booze is okay, but these guys get berry, berry intoxicated... A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Cluin Date: 16 Jan 04 - 02:22 PM Got this one in the old e-mail the other day: Subject: Why are we still there? It is time to take a serious look at our involvement in this place. Every day there are news reports about more deaths. Every night on the TV are photos of death and destruction. Why are we still there? The land is too large to secure all of it. The bad people causing this damage can roam anywhere, and we can't possibly police the whole place. Why are we still there? We occupied this land, which we had to take by force, but it causes us nothing but trouble. Why are we still there? Their government is unstable, and in the process of changing. Why are we still there? Refugees are fleeing by the thousands, driven from their homes. Why are we still there? It will cost billions to rebuild, which we can't afford. Why are we still there? There are more than 1000 religious sects. We can't even secure the borders. Why are we still there? And to repeat. Every day we hear of more Americans killed in this dangerous land. Why are we still there? It is clear; we must abandon California! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: LadyJean Date: 16 Jan 04 - 12:50 AM There is a hypoallergenic dog. It's called a poodle. I was raised with them. They don't shed, that's why they have to be clipped. It's also why they don't cause problems. No dog dander. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Uncle_DaveO Date: 15 Jan 04 - 04:42 PM Okay, okay, don't tease me! Drop the other shoe! Did Madras get rain? Dave Oesterreich |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Wolfgang Date: 14 Jan 04 - 11:12 AM A bridge over the Rhine was built between Swiss Laufenburg and German Laufenburg. There is a little problem: The altitude readings in Germany have the North sea as reference and the Swiss use the Mediterranean. That makes 27 cm difference and is known to experts. Now comes the easy part for any engineer: If the Mediterranean surface is somewhat more distant from the earth's center than the North sea, then all Swiss readings will have 27 cm more distance from the earth center already in them which means they are 27 cm higher than..., no wait, since the 27 cm don't show for the Swiss start already at a higher level, the altitude readings are lower than what they were if the Swiss had the North sea standard, you see, I mean you just add the 27 cm to the German reading which means you can also subtract it from the original swiss reading which is quite similar to what you get when you don't add them to the already corrected Swiss reading but you might as well not subtract them from the corrected German reading. My God, if you can't follow a simple addition/subtraction task you must be innumerate. Anyway, we now have a bridge which has a 54 cm difference to the street on the German side. The insurance of the engineering office will pay for the necessary adaption. Wolfgang |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 05 Jul 03 - 05:01 PM And in case you believedMark Twain when he complained that no one ever does anything about the weather, consider the mystical-agical resoucefulness of the gurus of old Madras: Ten donkeys marry as Madras runs dry June 29 2003 Five pairs of donkeys tied the knot yesterday in an elaborate public wedding staged in hopes of bringing rain to the parched south Indian metropolis of Madras. Several hundred devotees chanted mantras to bless the donkeys in eternal union in an hour-long ritual true to local Hindu marriage customs in all respects save species. Despite the scorching June sunshine, R K Bhagavathiraj, a religious scholar who organised the ceremony, said he was certain rain was now on its way. "Our scriptures have instances of donkeys being married to get rain. I am confident that after this ritual, Lord Varuna (the rain god) will bless Chennai (Madras) with copious rain," Bhagavathiraj said. The donkeys were brought in from across the state of Tamil Nadu for the marriage - and, their bachelor days over, will be shipped back to their owners. The ritual cost just over $US100 ($A150), said T Paramanandam, the manager at Bhagavathiraj's office. While donkey marriages have been conducted in the past as part of prayers for rain in Tamil Nadu villages, it was believed to be the first time such a ceremony was held in Madras. The city of 6.5 million has a critical shortage of water due to weak monsoons in recent years and a poor distribution system. For the past several months many Madras residents have had to seek water through tankers from the suburbs - or, failing that, through donkey marriages. AFP |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 30 Aug 02 - 09:56 AM Well, Tony, I never said ALL sperm were smart!! A
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Venthony Date: 30 Aug 02 - 02:23 AM Years ago, as an undergraduate at what is now Truman State University in Missouri, I stopped into a local bar for a beer. I wasn't much of a drinker in those days -- really. But it was Septemeber, and it was hot and my homework was finished, and it was Saturday night. When I walked in the door, the entire Athletic Dept. faculty was was already there -- at 9 p.m. -- and they were already well on: obscene, sexist, loud, profane, abusive. I learned later that this was their usual condition when not actually "teaching" on campus. I left the beer half-finished and retreated to the local Vietnam-vet-and-hippy-bar, where civilized behavior, believe it or not, was the rule rather than the exception. Understand, these were not athletes -- students; they were tenured faculty. Some of them professors. I've remembered the experience for going on 30 years, and I can only express sympathy and understanding for the young woman's plight. One thinks of the "whited graves" metaphor Jesus used to describe the pharisees. But least she has the comfort of knowing that stripping is an honorable, ancient and even artistic profession. Certainly she did nothing to dishonor herself or her school. Garden-variety collegiate establishment jocks, on the other hand, embrace dishonor and immorality as a birthright. Best wishes, Tony |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:38 AM And for those of you who always wondered why men do not stop and ask directions, the answer may be "smart sperm"!!
Smart human sperm 'have memory' 19:00 28 August 02 Exclusive from New Scientist Print Edition If human sperm turn in one direction, they will turn in the opposite direction at the next opportunity, Peter Brugger, a neurobiologist at University Hospital, Zurich, has found. Human spermatozoa seem to have some basic form of memory "It's certainly not cognitive memory," he says. But they must have some kind of memory. This kind of behaviour, known as spontaneous alternation behaviour, is found in a wide range of creatures. To see whether human sperm cells exhibit it, Brugger recorded which way 714 healthy sperm cells turned when confronted with a left or right choice in a T-shaped channel. As expected, half the sperm went left and half went right. But in a maze that forced the sperm to turn right before they reached the T-junction, 58 per cent turned left. Brugger, whose work will appear in Behavioural Brain Research, thinks the percentage that "remember" which way to turn would be even greater if the maze were smaller. The sperm had to swim 10 times their body length after the forced turn, so some of them may already be "forgetting". "Could be flocking" One simple explanation could be that each turn causes an asymmetry in the mechanism that controls a cell's tail, or flagellum. It then compensates by turning in the opposite direction next time. But it is also possible that the sperm are somehow communicating. "They could be flocking," Brugger says. To test this, he plans to repeat the experiment one sperm at a time. In the body, sperm follow a chemical trail to the egg. "But they may have choices [of which way to turn] when they get very close to the egg," says reproductive biologist Harry Moore of the University of Sheffield. Testing for alternation behaviour could be a way to check the health of sperm used for IVF, he adds. Duncan Graham-Rowe Regards, A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 29 Aug 02 - 11:34 AM Meanwhile, the old truism that property drives humans insane seems to be holding its own. Marx may have been madder than a fruitcake, but for reasons we dare not go in to, he seems to have caught on big time: --- From: "Ben" To: Subject: Minnesota city to tax rainwater (no joke) Date: Thu, 29 Aug 2002 10:04:53 -0400 Check please. http://www.winonadailynews.com/rednews/2002/08/23/build/news/1.php ---- http://www.winonadailynews.com/rednews/2002/08/23/build/news/1.php City to tax rainwater By Jerome Christenson / Winona Daily News Starting next year, rainwater will no longer be free in the city of Winona. While it hasn't figured out how to tax air or sex, beginning in 2003 the Winona City Council will charge city property owners for the rain that falls on their land. [...] --- Date: Thu, 29 Aug 2002 08:46:26 +0200 From: =?iso-8859-2?Q?Pawe=B3?= Krawczyk To: declan@well.com Subject: Poland wants to know what people own Polish members of parliament apparently became angry with the financial declarations they have to publish every year. So they came up with a new act requiring everyone to declare everything they own, to the goverment. This would apply to all people living in Poland, not only Polish citizens. The extraordinary act is intended to help fighting organized crime and take the goods people got committing crime. However, the assumption that criminals will happily declare all their goods seems not very likely. -- Pawe³ Krawczyk, Kraków, Poland http://echelon.pl/kravietz/ crypto: http://ipsec.pl/ horses: http://kabardians.com/ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 01 Jun 02 - 03:37 PM Other kinds of animals are interested in seeing a more just world. also:
Squirrel Sleuth Cracks Robbery "A 29 year old man was arrested at 1:20 a.m. suspected of burglary," a spokeswoman for Avon and Somerset Police told Reuters. "When officers returned to the scene of the crime they were met by a secret squirrel," she added, reading from the case-book. "The squirrel indicated it wanted the officers to follow it by running a little, stopping and then looking back before continuing." She said it then climbed a tree, at the base of which officers found four boxes of stolen crockery. "We are not keen to highlight this," said the spokeswoman. "We never like to encourage vigilantes."
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: GUEST,DM Date: 30 Mar 02 - 02:43 AM Cats own the world. They have since their first meeting with man. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Mrrzy Date: 29 Mar 02 - 12:03 PM That cat story is scary, anybody see the movie Cats and Dogs? The cats are succeeding in taking over the world! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 29 Mar 02 - 09:14 AM It's one thing to toss your cookies, but this is ridiculous:
SLIDELL, La. (Reuters) - Two The truck was parked at a Two suspects hopped in the
They abandoned the truck when they were spotted by police responding to reports of a dangerous driver who was losing his doughnuts. Passenger Rose Houk, 31, was captured, but the driver, whose name was not released, ran away. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Hollowfox Date: 29 Jun 01 - 11:32 AM Nonessential protein indeed! What do they think keeps the stripes from falling off? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Grab Date: 28 Jun 01 - 05:04 PM Do cats get up your nose too? Taken from the BBC website... Designer cat controversy Allergy-proof cats could be the next genetically modified animals to be born. A biotechnology company intends to alter the genetic makeup of moggies to create the perfect pet for allergic cat lovers. The cats that we produce will be like any other cats except they will no longer have the protein that causes an allergic reaction in human beings. Transgenic Pets claims sufferers will soon be able to own a cat without fear of a runny nose or streaming eyes. But animal welfare groups say the plans raise serious animal welfare and ethical issues. "We're simply removing a non-essential protein from the cats and it shouldn't hurt the cats in any way," Jackie Avner of Transgenic Pets told the BBC. "The resulting cats will improve the medical health and the quality of life for millions of people." Transgenic Pets is working with cattle cloning expert Jerry Yang of the University of Connecticut, US. According to Professor Yang, an allergen-free feline could be available for sale by the year 2003. It would come with a $1,000 (£709) price tag. The company is still looking for funding to carry out the work. It intends to knock out the gene that codes for the protein linked to human allergic reactions. "Allergic sensitivity to cats has been attributed to one major protein that is secreted on the cat's skin," said Ms Avner. "The cats that we produce will be like any other cats except they will no longer have the protein that causes an allergic reaction in human beings." But the plans have been criticised by the UK's Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA). Vicky Robinson of the Research Animals Department said the work was a trivial application of a technology that already raised serious animal welfare and ethical issues. "While we sympathise with those people that have allergies we don't think this justifies producing GM cats," she said in a statement. "Many of the kittens are likely to die before birth and of those that survive there is the very real possibility that they may have abnormalities that compromise their welfare." Peter Jinman, Junior Vice President of the British Veterinary Association called for public discussion of the issue. "Instead of changing the environment to suit the animal, we are now looking at changing the animal to fit the environment," he told BBC News Online. "This is a new step that demands very careful consideration." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Kim C Date: 28 Jun 01 - 04:28 PM Well, how do we know it ain't true? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:59 PM For those of who think that paying respects to a Lucky Lizard means touching Spaw in strange places, here's a broader perspective: Thursday, June 28, 2001 Flocking to See the Lucky Lizard BANGKOK (Reuters) - Residents of a Thai town are flocking to the Chamlong Taengniem, whose son Charoen died in a motorcycle crash, Crowds of up to 200 people have been thronging outside the house in Some scratch the lizard's back and stomach and hunt for numbers for Chamlong, 51, says that her son turned into the lizard and she and her People in the mainly Buddhist nation believe in reincarnation and that Neighbor Pranom Chamchuen, 64, said she did not believe the lizard Just like the boy, the lizard is very polite, she added. "When the reptile wants to use the toilet, it crawls from its bed to a |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 23 Apr 01 - 10:23 AM They grow 'em tough in Michigan: Feuding Twins Force Airliner to Land ANCHORAGE, Alaska (Reuters) - An argument between twin sisters on a Shanghai-bound flight escalated into attacks on crew members and forced the aircraft to make an unscheduled stop in Anchorage, federal officials said on Friday.
The sisters, Cynthia and Crystal Mikula, 22, of Buckley, Michigan, were arrested when the United Airlines flight landed late on Thursday in Anchorage, the FBI said.
The twins were being held in a local jail pending a hearing before a federal magistrate on charges of interfering with an aircraft. The FBI said their argument began about four hours after departure from San Francisco and when a flight attendant tried to calm them, Cynthia Mikula struck her in the face.
A flight captain tried to intervene by sitting between the sisters. But Cynthia Mikula hit him in the head, and then her sister put another flight attendant in a chokehold, the FBI said.
During the whole confrontation, the sisters were screaming obscenities, the bureau added.
"As to what precipitated the fight, we don't know," said Eric Gonzalez, a special agent in the FBI's Anchorage office.
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: wysiwyg Date: 15 Apr 01 - 03:45 PM If only the buffalo could have driven the white eyes over a cliff. ~S~
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 15 Apr 01 - 03:31 PM Sunday, April 15, 2001 Elephants Drive Indian Villagers Into Trees NEW DELHI (Reuters) - Rampaging elephants lured by the smell of homemade liquor have forced nearly two dozen tribespeople to sleep in treetops in the eastern Indian state of Orissa, an official said Friday. Some 60 elephants are running amok in the area, damaging mud houses as they try to sniff out the alcohol, Ashok Meena, Keonjhar District Magistrate told Reuters by telephone. "Close to two dozen people are staying in the treetops with family members because they are afraid of the elephants. They often take their bedding and food (with them) during the night," Meena said. At least half a dozen people have died in the past 18 months in elephant attacks in the area and 200 houses have been damaged or destroyed, he said. The elephants have been drawn to the area, 220 km (137 miles) from the state capital of Bhubaneshwar, by the smell of handia, a local brew made out of fermented rice, he said. "These elephants come into the villages damaging the houses and scaring the villagers away," Meena said. Local tribespeople as well as settlers from outside the district have cut down large tracts of the forests where the elephants live. A rise in the number of people around the forests has increased the problem. The local administration has urged people to move out of the so-called elephant corridor -- which cuts through three districts of Orissa including Keonjhar -- and is meant to be a safe haven for the animals. But it has had little success. "People don't want to leave their villages despite our persuasion," Meena said. India's elephant population numbers around 25,000 with at least half in the southern states. Conservationists say elephants are being forced out of jungle habitats by rapid deforestation, leading to attacks on villages and towns. Last November, in the northeastern state of Assam, herds of elephants wreaked havoc at an Indian Air Force base. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: GUEST,petr Date: 13 Apr 01 - 03:16 PM the article above on witchcraft in africa is scary. Even this day people are burned alive (necklaced with a tire filled with gasoline.) All because people believe that nothing bad happens or no one gets sick without someone else being at fault. Often they see a witch doctor who tells them so and so put a curse on them. The innocent person often ends up being killed by the mob. Horrendous. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 13 Apr 01 - 01:41 PM Oh, clone, hear my plea and tag that bold bracket at the end of the title! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 13 Apr 01 - 01:40 PM A refreshing effort to use mythological referents to escape a difficult situation: Smugglers Say Virgin Mary Gave Them Cash BOGOTA, Colombia (Reuters) - A family nabbed with $1 million in cash stuffed in baggage and babies' diapers told Colombian customs authorities that the money had suddenly appeared along with an apparition of the Virgin Mary.
Colombia's Customs Department said that officers found U.S. dollars stuffed in baggage, children's clothing and even diapers after stopping a family of three adults and two minors at Bogota's international airport on Wednesday.
The Colombian nationals had arrived from Spain on an Iberia flight, and one of group's female members tried to explain the money by saying the Virgin Mary had appeared before the family and the greenbacks had simply fallen into their hands.
The adult members of the group were arrested.
It is illegal to bring more than $10,000 in cash into Colombia without declaring it and the authorities have stepped up efforts to crack down on illegal money entering the country, the world's biggest cocaine producer.
Regards,
A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Bill D Date: 09 Apr 01 - 06:49 PM wow, Alex...gives a new meaning to the old song In the Middle of the House! It used to be that the railroad came to YOU! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:36 AM In other news, women's rights is sinking in even in far away places: ACCRA (Reuters) - An 80-year-old Ghanaian woman has taken pioneering steps toward ending an ancient practice which condemns dozens of women each year to a life of exile and misery as witches, the state Ghanaian Times said on Thursday.
Janet Tibu has taken legal action against the chief and elders of Peki-Avetile in the Volta region, who declared her a witch last August, fined her and cast her out of her village. Dozens of Ghanaian women suffer a similar fate each year. Some are stoned to death. Others are confined to camps where witchdoctors subject them to traditional exorcism rites after which they are forced to till the land as bonded laborers. Tibu was accused by a traditional village tribunal last year of bewitching a local herb doctor, who claimed she was the cause of his poverty and impotence.
She says she suffered humiliation as crowds jeered and taunted her after she was convicted. She has since lived in agony and poverty, isolated from her children who are forbidden to visit her. -------------------------- I dunno ... trial by jury seems to fall short on accusations of making the local herb doctor impotent. Shades of "The Crucible"!. A
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: mousethief Date: 04 Apr 01 - 05:27 PM Well I don't know if it made the news but we had a bizarre railway accident right here in little old Sumner, Washington. A man was moving a house (not a prebuilt, but a site-built house that he was moving from one lot to another) and had carefully done all his homework, even calling the train company to make sure when there would be the longest stretch with no trains on the track at the crossing the house would have to cross. (Houses move very slowly on the road, don't you know.) As it turns out they were running an extra train that night on account of the football game, and the person in the office at the train company failed to notice or remember this crucial fact. You guessed it. Total matchwood. And to top it off the train company was going to sue this guy for damage to the train! Not sure how that one came out. I'll look for it in some of the local newspaper web sites. Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: GUEST,Roll&Go-C Date: 04 Apr 01 - 05:12 PM I'm transplanting this story from the Poor Old Man Crossing the Road thread; maybe this will be more fertile ground: I recently ran across a description of the "Year's Wackiest Accident" reprinted in the COFFEE NEWS, Vol. 5, Issue 42, April 2, 2001 – a irreputable source if there ever was one: "It happened at a railway crossing in Britain, where a car stopped suddenly when it (sic) realized a train was approaching. A motorcyclist behind the car smashed into the back of the car, flipping the motorcyclist into the air. He (the motorcyclists) landed behind a horse and rider waiting at the crossing, which startled the horse, causing it to bolt. A man walking his dog rushed to the rescue, but not before tying his dog to the railway barrier. After the train passed by the barrier went up, taking the dog with it. The dog's owner hurt himself jumping to get his pet. Only the horse rider filed an insurance claim." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 04 Apr 01 - 04:08 PM Meanwhile, in the "One man's Darwin is another man's Icon" department, this news from Cambodia: Wednesday, April 4, 2001 Holy Men Tour with Two-Headed Calf Corpse PHNOM PENH (Reuters) - Two holy men are touring northwestern Cambodia with a corpse of a two-headed calf to raise money for a shrine for the animal, which is considered by some to be a symbol of prosperity. Some believe that viewing the corpse of the deformed calf, which died soon after its February 1 birth, will make them prosperous and popular, the Rasmei Kampuchea (Light of Cambodia) newspaper reported Wednesday. "This strange two-headed cow is very holy. If someone has seen this cow and pays homage, he will have prosperity and win over his enemies," one villager said.
The two men, who are visiting towns along the Cambodian-Thai border, said they collect as much as 1,500 Thai baht ($33) per day from villagers.
So, if you're looking to gain prosperity, and gain over your enemies, why, your course of action is clear!!! Regards, A
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Bill D Date: 03 Apr 01 - 11:57 PM LOLOL...it took me a minute, Amos!...maybe the gummint needs one of them XXX sites to IM-prove its image! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 03 Apr 01 - 02:19 PM I swear I did not make this up! From a copy of Federal Computing magazine: Delays, image hurt IT workforce BY Greg Langlois "Workforce reforms in store" [Federal Computer Week, March 26, 2001]
"Report: Flexibility key to staffing woes" [Federal Computer Week, March 26, 2001]
"Workforce woes make GAO's high-risk list" [Federal Computer Week, Jan. 22, 2001]
"The government's cumbersome hiring process and poor pubic image — not necessarily its relatively low pay — are keeping information technology workers away, members of an IT recruitment and retention workshop said Monday." I've heard of anthropomorphicizing the Gummint, but this is ree-DICK-lous!:>) A
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Bill D Date: 03 Apr 01 - 12:15 AM where I shop, the lobsters have their claws taped closed...he was even too dumb to check! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 02 Apr 01 - 10:24 PM And now for something really different, if true: Crustacean-Implemented Birth Control for Criminals! The following unconfirmed tale was distributed by a group that has takenover the old Darwin Award shtick: LOBSTER VASECTOMY -- 2000 Darwin Award Nominee (Unconfirmed) (2000, England) This tale proves that crime does pay, if you're fishing for elective surgery to go along with your stolen goods. A 24-year-old supermarket shoplifter stuffed five lobsters in his pants and sprinted for the door, but he never had a chance. The violated crustaceans brought the thief to his knees in front of startled cashiers when they fastened their powerful claws around his delicate parts.
Doctors were able to remove the animals with pliers. They say the thief will fully recover -- except for one small detail. "It was a do-it-yourself vasectomy." This man's daring supermarket exploits make him one of the few Darwin Award winners to live to tell the tale. The supermarket manager declined to press charges, saying the culprit has already "gone through enough pain (to) learn his lesson." I think this is a historical first! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amergin Date: 02 Apr 01 - 03:15 PM Oh, that sounds exciting.....how can I sign up? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 02 Apr 01 - 02:42 PM I think that's where one person transmits power to another through the use of a whip, or boots, or by locking them in chains... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amergin Date: 02 Apr 01 - 12:17 PM Ok, but what is Power Exchange? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Troll Date: 02 Apr 01 - 12:05 PM Thought you might enjoy this one even though it's a bit long. troll With Carl Limbacher and NewsMax.com Staff For the story behind the story... Saturday, March 31, 2001 It's a Jungle Out There in Academia A Princeton University prof's idea of loving animals is having sex with the critters, the University of Oregon offers student financing of "how-to" guides on vandalism and arson and other forms of terrorism, and SUNY-Albany has OK'd a campus S&M club. These are three of the five outrageous campus incidents that provoked the Intercollegiate Studies Institute (ISI) to give their annual Polly Awards to five institutes of so-called higher learning for providing last year's worst examples of out-of-control political correctness on American campuses. Topping the list of winners for 2000 was Princeton University, which earned the distinction for tolerating the likes of one Dr. Peter Singer. Bioethicist Singer, the DeCamp Professor in the University Center for Human Values who is already infamous as the proponent of a woman's right to choose to off her living child if it is disabled or otherwise inconvenient to mommy and daddy's lifestyle, now wants people to feel free to bugger their pets - or be buggered by them. Singer insists that our physical similarities with other mammals - mostly genital - are so strong that the taboo on bestiality stems not from physical differences but from "our desire to differentiate ourselves, erotically and in every other way, from animals." He describes a charming vignette in support of his love-the-animals-every-which-way proposal. "Who has not," he asks, "been at a social occasion disrupted by the household dog gripping the legs of a visitor and vigorously rubbing its penis against them? ... [I]n private not everyone objects to being used by her or his dog in this way, and occasionally mutually satisfying activities may develop." Next on the list is the University of Oregon, which allows a wacked-out animal liberation cabal, specializing in "liberating" lab animals and destroying private property through vandalism and arson, to have an office at the university in Eugene despite the group's call for criminal terrorism such as arson against certain targets, including some university research professors. The December 8 issue of the group's newspaper, the Insurgent, carried an eight-page insert titled: "The ALF Primer: Your Guide to Economic Sabotage and the Animal Liberation Front." "First, you may want to decide what kind of establishment you want to target - a fur shop, a butcher shop, a factory farm or slaughterhouse, or maybe a fast food restaurant?" the piece notes. Detailed instructions follow on gluing locks, vandalizing vehicles, clogging toilets and committing arson. "As dangerous as arson is, it is also by far the most potent weapon of direct action," says the Insurgent. "A simple way to burn a vehicle is to place a sheet or blanket on top or underneath and soak it in flammable liquid. ... If not using a time-delay device, try to light it from as far away as possible by lighting the end of a rolled up newspaper, flare or other torch-like object." In an effort to be helpful to prospective campus terrorists, the group's paper included an insert on the facing page showing the names, home phone numbers and home addresses of some research professors, with the suggestion to "tell them how you feel about the 'research' they do." ISI notes that the university has failed to respond to this outrage in any way. SUNY (State University of New York) in Albany earned its Polly with the establishment of New York State's first college-funded S&M club. The so-called Power Exchange was founded by two coed students who report no objections from the administration. "The response has been great," one student told the local press. "When my brother found out, he was like, 'I can't believe you could do something like that,'" she said. "Now, he's kind of OK with it. The rest of my family has been very supportive." A university spokeswoman sums up the official attitude toward the Power Exchange: "As long as they abide by the student guidelines, they have a right to have their club officially recognized by the student association on campus and to be funded by the student association." Temple University won a Polly for demonstrating its tolerance for opposing views by tossing a dissident in the booby hatch for daring to protest a campus play that portrayed Jesus as a practicing homosexual. "When Temple University student Michael Marcavage protested against the theatrical depiction of Jesus as a homosexual, he was subjected to Soviet-style behavior modification: handcuffed and committed to a psychiatric ward. Objecting to the portrayal of Jesus as the 'king of queers' in the highly controversial play 'Corpus Christi,' the student received permission from the school to stage a counterproduction based on traditional Christian teachings. A week before the productions, Temple canceled the traditional play, allegedly for lack of money." According to Marcavage's attorney, Brian Fahling, when Marcavage began to leave a meeting on the plays, thinking it was over, he was "pushed to the floor, then handcuffed and taken to the Temple University Hospital psychiatric ward ... and committed." The doctor evaluating him "saw no reason why he was committed," Fahling said, and discharged him. Marcavage filed suit against Temple in November 2000. (As an aside, Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton is currently staging the blasphemous play despite vigorous protests from lawmakers and outraged Christian groups.) Villanova University tied with the University of California at Berkley for the No. 5 spot on the Polly Awards roster. When students at Villanova wanted to bring NRA president Charlton Heston to campus, the school administration did everything it could to make the actor's appearance an administrative nightmare, if not an impossibility. Even though Heston waived his standard $20,000-$30,000 speaking fee, Villanova refused to pick up the tab for his basic expenses, including security fees and hotel room, under the guise that Heston was "too controversial." The Villanova Times, headed by Chris Lilik, was required to pay for extra security in anticipation of protesters, who were themselves financially backed by the school's own Center for Peace and Justice. Villanova funded protesters, whose presence required increased security, and then saddled the student group with the increased security costs. At Berkeley, after UC-Berkeley's main campus daily, the Daily Californian, ran author David Horowitz's ad, "Ten Reasons Why Reparations for Slavery Is a Bad Idea - and Racist Too," radicals protested the decision to run the ad and stormed the paper's offices and did what such folks always do: issued a list of demands. They demanded an apology from the paper's editors and stole all the remaining newspapers from campus racks. The Daily Californian ran a formal apology that claimed the ad was full of "incorrect and blatantly inflammatory content" and even refused to officially report the theft to campus police. T. Kenneth Cribb Jr., President of ISI, said, "We created the Campus Outrage Awards to widely disseminate instances of outrageous totalitarianism, the politicization of the college curriculum, and the insensitivity and bigotry of campus radicals. Many university deans and presidents deny the idea that political correctness exists and claim that critics of PC use exaggerated or outdated anecdotes. Year after year, the Pollys offer proof to the contrary."
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Troll Date: 02 Apr 01 - 12:00 PM Madness! Total Madness! Two teenagers ( 17 & 15) were talking on their cordless phones about a Time article on violence in the schools. She asked him"What if someone blew up our school?" "It's too big" said he, "It would take a ton of explosives" They continued to chat about how someone would go about diong it. Switch to next door where a lady is listening to a police scanner. She gets garbled bits of the conversation being intercepted by her scanner. She hears names, the word "bomb" and the name of the school. She calls the cops, they figure out who the kids are, come and search their rooms, take them overnight to juvenile shelter, and they are now charged with a felony;to wit: threatening to blow up the school. They are both on in-home detention and face a two-year expulsion plus a permanent record of a felony conviction. This is not a joke. Commonsense has flown. The world has gone mad. troll |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 02 Apr 01 - 11:12 AM Meanwhile, in other news across this troubled sphere... Women Dig Tunnel to Escape Jail KATHMANDU, Nepal (Reuters) - Six women inmates, all suspected Maoist rebels, escaped from a jail in west Nepal through a small tunnel they had dug, newspapers reported on Sunday. Home (interior) Ministry spokesman Gopendra Bahadur Pandey told Reuters the escape occurred at Gorkha district jail, 150 km (93 miles) west of the capital, Kathmandu, and said an investigation was underway. The Kathmandu Post and other dailies said all six inmates were members of the Communist Party of Nepal (Maoist), a rebel group that is fighting against the Himalayan kingdom's constitutional monarchy. Over 1,550 people have been killed in violence across Nepal since the Maoist insurgency started five years ago. The rebel group has been compared with Peru's Shining Path movement, and says it is campaigning to set up a one-party communist republic in the impoverished nation. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 01 Apr 01 - 03:08 PM Oh, the layers of contradiction! The inconsistencies! The dramatization! Logic slain on the altarstone of Rightness! Ethics crushed and abandoned in the rotting landfill of Moral Melodramas Incorporated! Justice sold into slavery by Lassitude, and swept up as a bargain by her new owners, Spreadsheets R Us. O, tempore, o, mores! There was a time when the grand Experiment of a Consitutional Republic held out hope for the betterment of the species through the deployment of more enlightened social invention. Now it feels as though we not only have dropped the ball, lost the goalposts, and forgotten the rules...but the crowds have all gone home to watch television! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Uncle_DaveO Date: 01 Apr 01 - 03:01 PM Quite a number of years ago now, coeds at Indiana State University, in Terre Haute, Indiana, were caught running a very successful cathouse to put themselves through the university. Presumably paid better than dancing. We used to say that you could always tell when a politician was running for Terre Haute mayor: He held a news conference and announced that there was no prostitution in Terre Haute! Dave Oesterreich |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: paddymac Date: 31 Mar 01 - 04:43 PM Inane morality run amock, again. But, Alex, I'm not so sure I would call exotic dancers "unskilled laborers." I guess it depends on what skills the job calls for. I would think that if the "entrepenurial spirit" were really so common in academia these days, some enterprising prof should have by now come up with a degree program ESK (exotic stimulatory (or simulatory?) kinesiology). Enrollments might swell, er, grow, er, well, increase anyway. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Amos Date: 30 Mar 01 - 08:20 PM Beautiful! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: mousethief Date: 30 Mar 01 - 06:12 PM This thread needs a little music. What better than...
She was workin' in a topless place
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: mousethief Date: 30 Mar 01 - 06:06 PM Kind of sexist, ain't it, Kim? I guess even Title 9 couldn't cut out that sort of attitude. And don't even get me started on whether track coaches should play God for their athletes. I'm sure that there probably aren't many better-paying jobs for the unskilled than "exotic dancing," sad to say. And let's face it, how many job skills did we have back when we were in college? I say more power to her, and let's get the athletic coaches out of the job of religious advisor. Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Kim C Date: 30 Mar 01 - 12:42 PM Well, now, see Grab, that's the funny part. It's okay for the students to GO there, but not okay to WORK there? As long as she is working there legally it shouldn't be a problem. But it is kind of sad to ponder that the best-paying job a college woman can get is taking off her clothes. Me, I worked in a Baskin-Robbins for a measly $3.50 an hour... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: Grab Date: 30 Mar 01 - 10:53 AM Any *identifying* clothing? Kinda difficult to get a university logo on a sequinned bikini, I guess. Meantime, I spose it's fine for the baseball team to be regular visitors at strip joints... Graham. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Bizarre Moments in Our Times III From: wysiwyg Date: 30 Mar 01 - 10:07 AM Watch them yptos dear. Titsan? Here, have a shot of fresh-bottled spring laughter. UNIVERSITY TRACK STAR STRIPPED OF UNIFORM, RESUMES EXOTIC DANCING CAREER. Eight-year-olds... what a relief. As soon as they subdue the Cabinet members and take their places, we can all breathe easier. Bert, bring mushrooms will you. ~S~ |
