The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP

Subject: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 06:01 AM

We have been singing a song for many years about 2 farmers arguing over the ownership of a cow - they take it to law and the case goes on and on during this time the lawyer is milking the cow.......

The song was learned by my co singist on his mothers knee (I know it would have been a longer song but she was only a short woman!) - and although we have come across jokes, pictures and a bronze statue depicting the incident it would be nice to know the history of the song and the story behind it and if it is based on a true incident. Also who wrote the song - it may have been John's (co-singist) Mum but he has no way to prove it or otherwise.

If you have any information it would be great - or if anyone knows who produced the pictures or bronzes

I have also heard the pictured and bronze referred to as "Litigation" or "The Litigation"

Cheers - Pete

The Song................ (written as it was first sung in a Lancashire Dialect)

THE LAWSUIT.

Two farmers met at a fair and between 'em bought a cow,
They both wanted to take it 'ome, but couldn't agree somehow.
They met a Lawyer on the way, who tried to square the case,
And how they carried on that day, you'd say t'was a disgrace.

----------

Chorus.

One Farmer pulled its 'ead and the other one pulled its tail,
And over it they had a jolly row, hello,
And both to law they went, and all their money spent,
Whilst the Lawyer kept a milking of the cow, cow, cow,
Whilst the Lawyer kept a milking of the cow.

----------

Said Brown unto the Lawyer, "Just list to what I say,
We bought the cow between us, Jones had no money to pay.
He said 'He'd give me an I.O.U.' but I didn't think that was straight,
If you tell me haow to keep the cow, I'll give you six and eight."

--chorus—

Said Farmer Jones, "Now make no bones, that cow belongs to me
We bought the cow between us, but I first the cow did see,
Brown knows we made a bargain, and now he wants to row,
But I mean to fight, with all my might, till he gives me half that cow."

--chorus—

So, Brown and Jones to law they went and what with fees and costs,
They at each other cursed and swore, till all their money was lost.
The Judge at last dismissed the case, and costs would not allow,
I'm sorry to say, that neither could pay, so the Lawyer kept the cow.

--chorus--

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 09:57 AM

Pete - you have anyway of posting the tune? (sorry - I've never seen or heard this before - so no imfo...)

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 10:22 AM

sorry - in the process of sorting midi to abc etc.... but not sorted as yet and I'd have to write a midi file as we haven't got one - might try and upload an mp3 to John Bonds Mp3 site as its on the CD.

cheers

Pete

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: Naemanson
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 12:30 PM

I need this song! Thanks so much for posting it and please let us know how and where to get the tune.

Unfortunately I cannot help you with it because I have never heard of it before this day, hour, and minute.

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 12:33 PM

clansfolk - if you have dots you can scan I can do midi and abc and post it. if that would be okay.

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 01:00 PM

MMario - no dots but my "better" half will transcribe the basic tune when she gets a couple of minutes and I'll get it to you - thanks

Naemanson - you could buy the CD - sorry that's the business man in me coming out, as soon as I can sort it one way or another It'll be posted to this thread.

It has always been done unaccompanied by John and myself (that's the way he learnt it) but the tune would lend itself to a instrumental backing

The song was transmitted on Radio Lancashire (Lancashire Drift - Nick Dow)a couple of months ago - John and myself went across to chat on air with Nick and they transmitted the original cassette recording by John's Mum (recorded by Nick Dow many years ago) then followed it on with the same track off The CD recorded by John.

Cheers

Pete

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 01:06 PM

Is the CD available in the US? It sounds like something I'd want to add to my wish list.

The snippets of the past you are giving on this are fascinating; thanks. I always like a song more when it comes with a history of this sort

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: Naemanson
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 03:27 PM

Pete, I COULD buy the CD with just a little more information on how where and how much. *BG* If I do that, though, I would probably want to get the chords as well. Oh, what the heck, I might as well ask for those too.

What chords for this or is it unaccompanied?

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 03:31 PM

pssssst! Naemanson....third paragraph - his posting of 1:00 pm today. - we can run it thorugh pavane's program.

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: Naemanson
Date: 16 Jul 01 - 03:41 PM

psssst! Mmario, don't tell anyone but I didn't read the whole message. Doh!

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: pavane
Date: 17 Jul 01 - 03:55 AM

Let me know if my program does the biz. Also, let me know if it doesn't, and I'll try and fix!

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 17 Jul 01 - 08:22 AM

CD Information on this web site follow the "Folk around the Fylde" section then "PI Recordings".

Arrangements have been made to upload a MP3 of the recording to John's MP3 Selection it has been OKed by John and will be uploaded tonight - but it usually takes a couple of days before its on line. I will post the link here once it has been uploaded. The song carries MCPS copyright and is at present logged to John Bond, John also owns performace rights to the recording - John is happy for anyone to download the Song, Perform or record the song - requesting that acknowledement is given to him for collecting the song. Original copyright of the recording belongs to PI Recordings who also give their permission for personal use of the MP3 but not for resale of this recording.

If that sounds a bit heavy it wasn't meant to be just saying - we hope you enjoy the song!!!!!

Pavane's program - who has the film rights!!!!! - if it is a chord from music generater - I don't think you'll need it! it quit a simple tune and I've attempted (off the top of my head) to give a rough idea of the chords in the key of D

A7two Dfarmers met at a fair and betA7ween 'em bought a Dcow,
They both wanted to Bmtake it 'ome, but Ecouldn't agree someA7how.
They Dmet a Lawyer on the way, who A7tried to square the Dcase,
And how they Gcarried Don that Gday, you'd Dsay t'was A7a disDgrace

A7One DFarmer pulled it's 'ead and the A7other one pulled it's Dtail,
And over it they Bmhad a jolly Erow, helA7lo,
And Dboth to law they A7went, and Gall their money Dspent,
A7Whilst the DLawyer kept a Gmilking A7of the Dcow,b>A7cow,Bmcow,
Whilst the DLawyer A7kept a Gmilking A7of the Dcow.

Hope that worked !

Take care

Pete

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: Naemanson
Date: 17 Jul 01 - 08:45 AM

Clansfolk, thanks for the CD info. But that raises another question about exchange rates and purchasing by mail. If they took a credit card I would expect to be charged that days exchange rate. But if I write a check at today's rate, whatever that is, what will happen on the other side of the pond if the rate changes?

Am I looking at too much complication? Is anal retentive a hyphenated word?

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 17 Jul 01 - 05:07 PM

dun no, dun no, Yes, yes, yes, and yes!

You could always send dollars or god forbid pounds sterling! or cheaper still wait til' the MP3 is posted - no exchange rate on mp3s! and down loading is is faster than the post!

enjoy.......

Pete

How about coming over to one of the festivals we're playing at (or get us some gigs in the States next year!) - Fyldes not far away (31st Aug - 1st & 2nd September) September in Fleetwoods OK (although some times cold and damp!) - it's a great festival with lots going on!

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 18 Jul 01 - 08:40 AM

JOHN BOND/PENNY BLACK MP3s

"The Lawsuit has now been sent to MP3.com waiting to be available from the site - "Toast" is available for download.

Take care

Pete

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 21 Jul 01 - 05:45 PM

John Bond's CD "Before It's Too Late" in total has now been sent to mp3.com and will soon be available for download

John's new web address (site in the process of being built)is http://www.johnbond.england.tc at present this url will take you to the MP3.com section for John

Will update when mp3.com do!

Further CD's from PI Recordings will be release via MP3.com in the future once cleared with the artists. Already cleared and the next to appear will be be The Elderly Brothers CD - "Proceed with Caution" - details to follow.........

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 24 Jul 01 - 10:27 AM

MP3 of "The Lawsuit is now available" from Mp3.com on John's page (see previous post) so for all of you who want the tune etc... pop along have a listen or download it..... hopefully the rest of the CD will be on before too long.

If anyone out that has found any info on the song, picture or bronze please remember the original topic of the thread also if anyone would like to add the songs to their "Station" Mudcat members folk or otherwise that would be great!

Pete

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: pavane
Date: 24 Jul 01 - 10:41 AM

Only just picked this one up again - yes, my program is a chord from music generator, provided that the music is available in one of the notations which are supported. These are currently
a) abc (a large subset, but a few features are incompatible with the internal representation)
Simple MIDI files, with no polyphonic channels nor overlapping notes
Noteworthy notation - (old version), which it uses internally.
It may be the only one available which understands modal tunes? Let me know if I am wrong
Don't know what you mean about the film rights - Hollywood haven't been in touch recently (I'm still waiting...). Should I include a video clip of Dubai Sharjah Morris?

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 24 Jul 01 - 12:11 PM

Pavane-

Have down loaded a copy of your program and I am very impressed....

re film rights just put that down to my sad Lancashire sense of humour (or lack of!) "Pavane's Program" sounded a very good title for a Spy thriller! - to me at least.....

Pete

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: pavane
Date: 24 Jul 01 - 05:56 PM

OK you can write it and I'll take a cut.

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: clansfolk
Date: 24 Aug 01 - 06:16 AM

refresh

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: PennyBlack
Date: 26 Nov 07 - 05:29 PM

still trying to find where this song came from - came across this thread again - thought I'd update John's details as he has a MySpace site now.

As you may know John is the other Half of Penny Black and although the original Lawsuit song was unaccompanied we do nowadays have a guitar backing and made one or two changes. I'll have a word with John and see if we can post the original Lawsuit by his Mum and his to the site - maybe record the latest variation and post that as well!


Happy Lancashire Day for tomorrow!

Pete

www.myspace.com/JohnaBond

http://www.PennyBlackFolk.co.uk

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST,Nick Dow
Date: 27 Nov 07 - 05:19 PM

I still have the original recordings of Johns mother and his Auntie. Beth Bond had a stonking version of 'The maid and her Box' to a very unusual tune with a short and effective chorus. There are some nice childrens songs and a couple of hunting songs as well. I published them on a tape called Fleetwood Mashers. I dont mind running off a few copies if any one is interested.
[e-mail]

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST,Penny Black
Date: 27 Nov 07 - 09:44 PM

Hi Nick

What about a CD version? It's was such a great tape and such a wonderful nostalgia trip (especially for John!)

For those out there that haven't heard the tape - take Nick up on his offer!

PB

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST,Nick Dow
Date: 28 Nov 07 - 04:40 PM

Do you think there is a market for a CD copy? I could get it done to without too much trouble.

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST,Folk Inlaw
Date: 26 Feb 15 - 07:15 AM

The Lawsuit is available as an MP3 Download by Penny Black.

https://play.google.com/store/music/album/Penny_Black_Folk_The_Lawsuit?id=Bzxinxkq7v2ep2zn64nnkpl2fni

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Feb 15 - 07:17 AM

The Lawsuit

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: Mr Red
Date: 27 Feb 15 - 05:38 AM

isn't this related to the famous cartoon in Hograth's time - though there are many versions of the picture
eg three on this website

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: Mo the caller
Date: 27 Feb 15 - 08:12 AM

Sounds like a folk-tale. based on general distrust of lawyers
Reminds me of an Enid Blyton story of 2 children trying to divide a stick of rock, but complaining that one was longer. A helpful friend offered to put things right - bit off the excess - compared - bit again - etc. The final inch was taken as 'fee'.

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST
Date: 27 Feb 15 - 05:58 PM

John Kirkpatrick recorded this under the name of The Farmers and the Cow on his Make No Bones album.

You can hear it on YouTube: CowTube

LFF

Subject: RE: The Lawyer - 2 Farmers - 1 Cow HELP
From: GUEST,KPC Preston
Date: 27 Feb 15 - 09:34 PM

John Kirkpatrick obtained the song from Penny Black (John Bond & Pete Skinner)