Farting in Public

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Smokey.
Date: 02 May 11 - 10:14 PM

Letting rip in public is quite normal in China.

It's a long way to go for a trouser-cough.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Shanghaiceltic
Date: 02 May 11 - 10:11 PM

During my time in Shanghai I was once giving some training to some cusotmers at the office. The done thing was to buy them lunch and carry on in the afternoon.

This I did, however the only lady in the group of 5 stood in front of the displayed equipment and then calmly lifted a leg and let rip.

She did this on several occassions and I am sure she was trying to put me off my stride...I continued manfully on.

Letting rip in public is quite normal in China.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Janie
Date: 02 May 11 - 09:03 PM

Now see?   if I had read that long ago, I would have given up on garlic (being a member of the onion family,) and kale much sooner.

Or even not reading it, had I but heeded the words of my father, his wisdom passed down through generations of eastern Kentucky farmers, and mayhap and perchance, handed down even longer thence from ancestors of assorted and diverse origins, his wisdom being, "put the kale through two changes of water to boil the farts out of it," I might still be happily married.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Joe_F
Date: 02 May 11 - 08:17 PM

http://come-to-think.livejournal.com/?skip=40

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Janie
Date: 02 May 11 - 06:51 PM

Ahhh, Youth.

I remember the days when a cough might possibly conceal a fart as opposed to causing a fart.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Michael
Date: 02 May 11 - 05:19 PM

As my old Grannie used to say:
Let your wind go free where ere you be; in church or chapel let it rattle: A fart's fart and not a crime, it gives the bowels ease, it warms the bed in winter time and suffocates the fleas.

Mike

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 02 May 11 - 08:09 AM

Refresh:
see associated thread Here

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: David C. Carter
Date: 13 Jan 06 - 10:34 AM

Maybe this is where the word TRUMPET comes from.

David

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 13 Jan 06 - 10:23 AM

Don't ever take him to a pet shop.. he could severely injure himself laughing!

LTS

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: David C. Carter
Date: 13 Jan 06 - 05:07 AM

Here In France last year they put on a programme about a very famous Petomane.He would"perform"on stage,on his back,legs in the air while holding a match.He drew wild applaus for his efforts.I had to leave the room,followed by my son.Talk about a fart in a spacesuit.My Croatian wife tried to teach our son to count in her language.She could never get beyond the n°5,because the n°5 is "pet" which in French means fart.To him it sounded like:Un-deux_trois-quatre---fart.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Splott Man
Date: 13 Jan 06 - 04:04 AM

There was a young fellow called Martin,
Who had an immaculate parting.
He said that the knack
Was to stand back to back
With a very large elephant far enough away to be comfortable.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: GUEST,Bevis
Date: 12 Jan 06 - 08:15 PM

Baking brownies

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Peace
Date: 12 Jan 06 - 07:30 PM

LOLOLOL

Love it.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 12 Jan 06 - 07:24 PM

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=423412654049302774

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Leadfingers
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 08:51 PM

Two hundred !!!

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Leadfingers
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 08:50 PM

Except

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Leadfingers
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 08:49 PM

Cant think of any thing that would add to this rthead

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: JennieG
Date: 13 Jan 05 - 06:53 PM

Billy Connolly reckons "it's yer arse applaudin' - you know when you clap hands together real fast and make a noise, well it's yer cheeks clappin'! They're applaudin' yer!"

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Peace
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 09:27 PM

A really good fart don't leave nothin' but the elastic band.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 08:24 PM

So how often did they wash the stairs?

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Alaska Mike
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 06:54 PM

I knew a fellow once who could fart "Yankee Doodle" as he went up the stairs. Unfortunately, the fingerings were such that he had to wash his hands after each performance.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: RichM
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 03:29 PM

Go ahead, fart away! If you are really talented, you can fart at least part of a major scale...

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 02:15 PM

Try to eat less roughage in the evening... it brews in the gut over night and will release during the day. Eat the roughage for breakfast or lunch and it should be about ready by bedtime, just right to warm the bed.

LTS

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: GUEST,leisurebeing
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 01:40 PM

i always have horrible gas at school. as much as i might try to hold it in, it always comes out. how embarassing it is!

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: GUEST,Arne Langsetmo
Date: 05 Oct 04 - 02:21 AM

We used to have a rudimentary (I use that word advisedly) classification system...

Wouldn't that be "alimentary system", my dear Watson.

WRT the French: "Le Petomaine" derives from "peterade" -sp? - ...

I've heard that "being hoist on one's own petard" may refer to such type 'explosions' (although the alternative definition of "petard" as a small explosive device or a torpedo also seems to work; it seems that the "petard" military definitions is likely derived from 'small explosions' ... the "petere"). See this. I prefer the alimentary visual of someone being "hoist on his own petard" myself....

Cheers,

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 04 Oct 04 - 11:25 AM

So he was the one who was always farting in Church!!! LOL
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: JennyO
Date: 04 Oct 04 - 11:10 AM

In my family, it was referred to as an 'organ recital' - all the funnier considering that my dad was a church organist.

Jenny

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Oct 04 - 07:42 AM

From the Thread List...

Unwanted Accompaniment
Farting in Public

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 04 Oct 04 - 05:59 AM

She would be frustrated playing bum notes!
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Oct 04 - 12:14 AM

Maybe she was just a frustrated Tuba player...

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Shanghaiceltic
Date: 03 Oct 04 - 08:42 PM

My sone came up with the expression 'Scuse me I just trod on a duck'

In China guffing is not considered a problem. Indeed I was once give a presentation and demonstration on some calibration equipment just after lunch. Three male engineers and a lady engineer were present.

Just as I was about to get to a quite technical bit the lady engineer literally lifted a leg and let rip. I tried not to be thrown off the subject in hand. She repeated the action a few more times, all with a dead pan expression on her face. Was this a comment on my presentation skills I have always wondered?

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Joe_F
Date: 03 Oct 04 - 06:20 PM

Donnel was probably thinking of Franklin's "Brussels Letter". I have it on disk, but it will take a little editing before I can post it.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 03 Oct 04 - 10:47 AM

Wonder if that's where the idea for a jet engine came from...can't ask Whittle now I suppose can we?
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: el_punkoid_nouveau
Date: 03 Oct 04 - 09:10 AM

Oh well - it's a year since the dog died, and I still blame him ('cos he can't answer back!).

My beloved tells the tale of our first holiday together - supposed to be her honeymoon. Apparently, I let rip int he middle of the night to such effect that I lifted myself off the bed!

epn

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 03 Oct 04 - 08:18 AM

Have you ever considered the range of "wind breakings"
A Fluff......Silent but deadly.
A puff.......only just audible
A pip........audible but very short duration.
A trump......the average passing of wind.
A pump.......a forced passing of wind.
A fart.......one that all can hear.
A ripper.....long lasting, sounds like tearing material(can be mistaken for trouser seams splitting)....(IF YOU'RE LUCKY)
A blaster....speaks for itself.
There is also the "Duck fart" which comes out in phases as you walk along or as you come downstairs.
Any more for any more????
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: GUEST,Guest Bottyburp
Date: 03 Oct 04 - 03:59 AM

Regarding affectionate nicknames for farts, my mother related to me the fact that in her household - in Glasgow, between WWI and WWII - a resonance of farts was described as:
"A Bugle Call from Tolie land, that the Khaki Boys are coming!"

Perhaps the Trumpet voluntary should be re-named Trump'l'ole.

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: catspaw49
Date: 03 Sep 04 - 08:27 AM

Here ya' go Dude.......

http://www.luke179.com/funstuff/bigone1.wav

Spaw

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From:
Date: 03 Sep 04 - 07:07 AM

I am trying to locate the song, The Day Daddy Let the Big One at the Mississippi Missionary Baptist Church. Can anyone help me?

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: GUEST,Boab D
Date: 16 Jan 04 - 06:10 AM

Hullo again well this has to be the best one ever well in my opinion it was so I will tell you.
On a lovely romantic holiday in Vienna with the new girlfriend who had never farted in front of me ever. So I decided that we should do the touristy thing and she wanted to also so we went to the museum of modern art. No problem went straight to the top and worked our way down. Now I'm not knocking modern art but at the top it was wierd and the further you decended the worse it became. Anyway get to the bottom level and it was the most, well ,vile I suppose is the only word for it of guys pishing into beakers on video and spitting blood all over each other just wierd well anyway there was the girlfriend and I laughing at the absurdity of this trying to keep it in obviously as we dont want to offend the curators or the other tourists when we turned a corner and this guy was having a shit (on film) pulling his cheeks apart well she just started laughing and a wee well quite a big fart came out and everyone in the gallery looked at us and this poor lassie was dying of embarassment and laughter for obvious reasons. One of those ones where you had to be there but if you are ever feeling blue of really sad for about €10 go to the museum of modern atr in Vienna and start at the top and work your way down. The pleasure I get from just thinking about it is amazing.

Dylan

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Cluin
Date: 15 Jan 04 - 01:13 PM

for a loud powerful one: touch cloth

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: wysiwyg
Date: 15 Jan 04 - 09:47 AM

Poot (ladies)

~S~

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Charley Noble
Date: 15 Jan 04 - 08:31 AM

"Break wind"
"Rip one"

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 15 Jan 04 - 08:10 AM

"shit a brick"

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: SueB
Date: 15 Jan 04 - 02:37 AM

Also,

pooy
toot
and
lay an egg

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Cluin
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 10:36 PM

Alternative terms for farts:

chuff
quack
pass gas
shit your pants
let one go
drop one
cut one
cut the cheese
salute the queen
float an air biscuit
released Lord Flatus from the Cave of the Winds
call your MP

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Charley Noble
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 07:31 PM

Just received my CD of "The Original Crepitation Contest" in the mail. It is an amazing recording! But really a bare bones package, no notes to speak of. I'd forgotten that Paul Boomer, the challenger, was an Australian. And even after hearing it after a lapse of 40 years, it's brilliance still...resonates.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: wysiwyg
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 06:20 PM

Dunno if y'all have this one already (just dropping in for a mo'!), but I think this fella prolly has us all beat:

LE PETOMANE (THE FARTISTE)

~S~

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Cluin
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 05:44 PM

She must've been a hit at the bake sales, Mike.    ;)

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Michael
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 05:36 PM

My Gran, a saintly old lady we always thought when we were young, taught us the '--in Church or chapel let it rattle' one (see above) and: A fart's a fart and not a crime, it gives the bowels ease, it warms the bed in winter time and suffocates the fleas.'

Subject: RE: Farting in Public
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 14 Jan 04 - 09:33 AM

My brother used to light his farts...this was all well and good until, much to my amusement, he set fire to his trousers!!! oh it was funny!!!