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Subject: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Art Thieme Date: 21 Feb 02 - 11:26 AM A song challenge If ya can't join 'em, beat 'em... |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Rick Fielding Date: 21 Feb 02 - 11:42 AM It won't work Art...this will get MANY responses...just like the "Fart" one will. C'est la vie. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 21 Feb 02 - 01:16 PM Oh the redheads and the blondes Wearing nothing but thongs And the Great Viagra Fountain There's a place for you And your big putz, too On the Big Cock Randy Mountain |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Mrrzy Date: 21 Feb 02 - 01:33 PM Good one, LEJ! |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Deckman Date: 21 Feb 02 - 05:37 PM Art ... I can't believe you posted this! Do you remember about a year ago, when we had a ten year old boy post for the first time? He was wanting advice on a school project revolving around the ballad of Henry Martin. I had a private e-mail conversation with his mother, assuring her that this was a family oriented web site. Bob |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 21 Feb 02 - 05:56 PM Bob, you weren't around back then, but Art, much to his chagrin, also started one of the longest running Mudcat threads in a similar way. You see, the place was just getting to know each other....not nearly as open as it is now........Anyway, we'd been running these really stupid "boiler-plate" threads like, "Where Do Mudcatter's Live" or work or whatever. They were getting really dumb and Art decided he'd point up how stupid they were by starting one of his own..........Welllllllllllllll............... It turned into a lloooooonnnnngggg thread and of course for posterity, everything here is archived, so poor ol' Art has to be reminded occasionally of his "contributions." Check it out Bob..... I can only hope that Art has "better success" here.....LOL.... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: DougR Date: 21 Feb 02 - 06:01 PM And some might think the Fart thread is a lot worse than this one. I suppose we could all talk about how to beat the breathalizer, though, Art. :>) DougR |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Jerry Rasmussen Date: 21 Feb 02 - 06:33 PM C'mon, Art: I thought that the one thing you loved about Mudcat were the requests for lyrics. Better to ridicule the things that really stink up the place, like Fart, Fart, Fart.
Love ya, though... Jerry
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Gareth Date: 21 Feb 02 - 06:39 PM No Doug, out of respect for your sensibilities I will not refresh that thread - If mainly, returning from Stoney Stratford. There was that sudden realisation, somewhere near Bicester, that I should not be driving. Gareth |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Art Thieme Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:08 AM Bob, Hell, yes, this is family site. And any way I can put an end to that I will. Personally, I'm sick of cloying family values and those pious ones that try to push 'em on me. And if I had ten minutes with the kid you mention I'd give him the Folk Legacy album by Jim Ringer and my dog-eared copy of "On The Road". ART THIEME |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Art Thieme Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:45 AM Jerry, No putting down of lyic requests. Why'd ya think that? I was just making yet another pun---like I always do----a play on words---just switching the first letters in the song title so to make a new and funny phrase; the lyric request was just to see who might do good parody. (Nice one, LEJ.) There ought to be plenty of room here for risque and even filthy folksongs. Where are all of you who scream whenever censorship rears it's head? Double standards, say, what? Art |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 22 Feb 02 - 01:00 AM What are we gonna do with all these damn Puritans, Arthur? |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: katlaughing Date: 22 Feb 02 - 02:30 AM My Dear Fine Art, I tried to explain your pfuns to someone else who is dear to me, but I am not sure that's possible!*bg* Anyway, at the risk of shocking some of the folks, this one's just for you: Oh the Big Cock Randy Mountain, Is so hard and full of steam, Makes the Rockies look so small Reaches to the ol' jet stream! The condoms are all empty There is nary one will fit It's bound to blow, though it won't be snow And no sleet will fall, but no one will know It's the Big Cock Randy Mountain! luvyakat |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: greg stephens Date: 22 Feb 02 - 03:47 AM i dont think Rock Candy Mountain needsparodying to make it distasteful. I quote from George Milburn's "Hobo's Hornbook"(1930. " 'The Big Rock Candy Mountain" , a tramp song, provides some excellent examples samples of trampfantasy. In many small cities and villages the children of poor whites use the railroad yards as their playgrounds. from these urchins the jockers sometimes recruit their preshuns, and to entice them they tell them roseate stories of tramp life. These fabrications are known as ghost stories. To the Home Guards 'The Big Rock Candy Mountain' may appear a nonsense song, but to all the pied pipers in on the know it is an amusing exaggeration iof the ghost stories used in recruiting kids." Additional information on this aspect of the song comes from Mac McClintock's reminiscenses (the guy who claimed to have written "Halleluya I'm a bum" and "Rock Candy Mountain"). his final verse runs as follows: "The punk rolled up hi s big blue eyes/And said to the jocker"Sandy/I've hiked and hiked and wandered too/ But I ain't seen any candy./I'm afraid that line was censored out for publication but I think we can all figure out roughly what it was. Kind of interesting, especially given the contribution to this thread re keeping the site clean for young boys and their moms. Folk songs are rarely pure and never simple as Oscar Wilde very nearly said. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Joe Offer Date: 22 Feb 02 - 06:19 AM Well, somebody sent me a message to complain about this thread. There were a couple of <br> line breaks missing in the post from Greg Stephens, so I added them. Please note the Explicit Lyrics Alert in the Mudcat FAQ. -Joe Offer, Mudcat Censor- |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Jerry Rasmussen Date: 22 Feb 02 - 07:13 AM Hi, Art:
Sorry that you're sick of "cloying family values". If you want to do everything you can to destroy that, count me out. You won't see me posting anymore. Jerry |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Peter T. Date: 22 Feb 02 - 10:12 AM I am strongly in support of family values: look at the House of Atreus, the House of Laius, the Karamazovs.... I particularly approve of the example of family values set by the great religious founders. The family values of the Old Testament families would look appropriate on the pages of the National Enquirer. Jesus's family: an unwed mother, the son wandering the roads at an early age, troublemaker, disrespectful to his mother, one father who disappears and is never spoken of again, and the other one suspiciously sadistic. The Buddha abandoned his wife and newborn son. Muhammed's marriage to the "older woman" (what is she doing running her own business?) was obviously shocking to the norms of the time. And I draw a discreet veil over Krishna's antics. yours, Peter T. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: greg stephens Date: 22 Feb 02 - 10:15 AM If Mudcat Cafe's function is to support family values it's a bit difficult to see how we fit Leadbelly and Woody Guthrie in. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: katlaughing Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:08 PM Jerry, come on, this is Art pulling people's legs, like he has always done. kat |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: SINSULL Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:09 PM On the Big Cock Randy Mountain A hard man's good to find He'll screw you up He'll screw you down He'll screw you from behind... Best I could do on short (pun intended) notice. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:15 PM BRAVO SINS!!!!!!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: SharonA Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:25 PM And here I thought this was a thread about a large rooster... *G* |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 22 Feb 02 - 12:28 PM Okay Group.....I'm not defending Art....He can do that himself if he wants. But anyone thinking he doesn't have some strong ideas about family needs to read ALL of this thread. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Art Thieme Date: 22 Feb 02 - 06:57 PM Yep,more double standards... Me and Bill Clinton ! Called "wishy-washy" whenever brave enough to simply change our minds. But to those who differ from the expressed views, we're to be called on the carpet and the political options exploited. And I've already told Jerry in a private message that it wasn't him I was piqued off at----it was Bob (Deckman) who was comin' down on old Art after he (Bob) had told a worried mom that he vouched for the fact that (and ultimate truth of the fact that) Mudcat was and always would be (as long as the grass shall grow) a family site. Oh, the humanity... Art |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Jerry Rasmussen Date: 22 Feb 02 - 09:38 PM Onward... Jerry |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Big John Date: 22 Feb 02 - 10:07 PM Aw,come on lads. Its all a bit of a laugh. If some 10 year old kid is willing to take the trouble to read the thread then he is smart enough to join the fun. The same smart kid will find millions of sites more capable of corrupting his prodigious mind if that's what he's after. Lets all say three hail marys for his mammy. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: katlaughing Date: 22 Feb 02 - 10:10 PM So my puny little effort is eclipsed by brew-ha-ha or is it bra-ha-hoo? Sheesh! |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Little Hawk Date: 22 Feb 02 - 10:20 PM On the Big Cock Randy Mountain The cops have wooden thingies The hound dogs mount 'most anything And the girls wear threadbare clingies The farmers' trees are full of "fruits" The barns are full of Lezzies I wanna go, where they're all hung low Where a man hangs loose like a ruptured moose On the Big Cock Randy Mountain Ugh! I gotta mention here that Burl Ives was not human. He was actually an Orangutan, albeit a well shaven and very musically talented one...this explains why he had the bad judgement to squeal on his folkie friends to the HUAC in Congress. He also could act darn well for an ape...check out "The Big Country". :-) - LH |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: GUEST,Orangutan Date: 22 Feb 02 - 10:33 PM CHORUS: At the parting of the knees, There's a musk scented breeze, And a golden flowing fountain, And the honey's sweet, Where the valleys meet, On the big Cock Randy Mountain. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Art Thieme Date: 22 Feb 02 - 11:53 PM refresh |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 Feb 02 - 01:20 AM Well, you folks have topped my feeble effort. But, like William the Conqueror, I have the satisfaction of having come first. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: harpgirl Date: 23 Feb 02 - 01:38 AM ...and just how do we get families without _ _ _ _ _? |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: greg stephens Date: 23 Feb 02 - 06:50 AM Well done LonesomeEJ I say. Bis dat qui cito dat. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 23 Feb 02 - 10:25 AM Yes Leej, you did come first.....and I understand from your wife that it's a problem you have quite often........... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 Feb 02 - 03:22 PM On the other hand, Spaw, your wife said any arrival at all was a welcome change. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: DougR Date: 23 Feb 02 - 03:31 PM Gareth; Been there, done that too. :>) |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 23 Feb 02 - 03:41 PM That's because some tings are just worth waiting for Leej......Of course your wife knows that some things are not. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 Feb 02 - 05:22 PM True. In fact, your wife said it was a lot like waiting for Elvis' come back. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 23 Feb 02 - 06:02 PM Well Leej, at least some feel that an Elvis comeback is worth waiting for, much like MY genitals! Yours however are more like his death....Limp, pathetic, used up......and wasted on the bathroom floor. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 Feb 02 - 06:37 PM Now you've stepped over the line. Nobody compares my rig to a dead rock legend and gets away with it. I'll see you and your Chevy at the Malt Shop, greaseball. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: katlaughing Date: 23 Feb 02 - 06:42 PM Boyz, boyz! Yeah, you tooz! Git ovah heah an' make nice, now...that's it I wants ya ta shake hands..NO, don't spit on 'em, foist! What? Was ya born in a barn! NO, don't take 'em outta yer pantz, there's no comparin' done here and ya ain't pissin' in anybody's boots, eithah, ya hear?! Now gowon...play nice and no more o'thet dirty-talk...I be callin' Karen and Lion if'n I heah any more, ya got thet? And you don't wanna hear what they REALLY got to say about youse and yer willies! katlaughingHAO |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 Feb 02 - 06:55 PM Good point kat. God forbid the truth should get out. er...Long Live the King? |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Little Hawk Date: 23 Feb 02 - 06:56 PM LOL!!! Behold these two worthies, awash in testosterone, bellying up to the Mudcat Bar, swaggering and blustering... Little does either of them realize the wonders that could be worked by a short study course at the WSSBA, observing Star Trek reruns, and taking notes on the "Shatner Method" of total masculinity! - LH |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 23 Feb 02 - 07:57 PM Short study? Gawd knows Shatner is damn short, especially in the "middle." I also notice you have a typo...You left the "e" off the beginning of the last word....should read: Shatner Method of Total Emasculinity. If he ever had anything worthwhile to begin with, I guess it must have been sent elsewhere on one of the transporter beams......It's obvious he had a lot of trouble with one of those beams at some point because his face and his ass have swapped places. Shatner's set in heat looks like a chow mein noodle flanked by two moldering raisinettes. Yours are sadly even smaller...I believe I heard someone refer to you as microscopic. Shatner's nads are the same size as Major Tom's pissant and psychotic brain. Thankfully Tommy boy couldn't be beamed back to pass on his psychosis and abject stupidity to another generation....then again, there's you. Hawk, your fascination with these two whiney and wimped out losers dictates a prolonged stay at the Neil Young Center for the Terminally Screwed where you can practice your tiple and noseflute while dreaming of being even half the size of Shatner. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: GUEST,Tiny Elvis Date: 23 Feb 02 - 08:27 PM Jesus Christ, he's got a nasty streak. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: catspaw49 Date: 23 Feb 02 - 08:33 PM Yes he does. I read where he threw the money changers out! Just threw 'em out!!! Ruined their businesses and everything and not a word of regret!!! Mean? You betcher ass!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: GUEST,BrittsTits Date: 12 Jan 11 - 08:05 PM Oh..the Big COCK Candy Mountain.. There's a volcano covered in snow. And a geyser waiting to surge. The texture smacks of yo-yos. Like a geyser on the verge. The explosion was elipsed. By a busty pair of lips. OH...That Big COCK Candy Mountain!! |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Lonesome EJ Date: 12 Jan 11 - 11:46 PM Wow, you woke up this old thread for that chunk of doggerel? Anyway, there is some classic Spaw in this that is worth checking out. |
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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: GUEST,G0dd0ll Date: 03 Sep 23 - 02:39 PM Each evening when the sun goes down, Then the home-hearth fires start burnin'. Then the sack--it's repose you're likin' And it's in that you are turnin'. In your head you saw logs and snore away After sheep you've been countin'. You're deep in sleep; first it's a peep, Then the big cock's randy, mountin'! When the big cock's randy, mountin' To awake you, there's no light; Nonetheless, that raucous rooster Rousts you from sleep--it's still night! You're no rock star; you need resting, Want the sunshine 'fore you stray. Now the birds and the bees Are still gettin' their Z's, But his wretched air stinks; You've got "screw bird!" thinks When the big cock's randy, mountin'. Yeah, the big cock's grandly shoutin'; Soporific soma begs For just several more hours of sleep; Hens ain't even laid their eggs. Now pharmacology is moot; His alarm's started your day. So you gotta go Start to brew the joe But watch out! Don't fall Down stairs, ya schmoe, 'cause your big cock's danglin' down, 'n' There's the big cock randy, mountin' A ruckus that's nonstop. You can little dream with all that squall; You're thinkin': "Gotta pop That cursed bird!". . .go and get your gat, Else you're gonna lose your mind. Got a .22 And a .32 You would really like to down him With a big bazoo- ka, that big cock. Damn his shoutin'! Got your big Glock handy, mountin' Sight atop the coop of tin. You've got it cocked; the firing pin Is ready to push in The bullet that's in the barrel. . . Give the trigger a flick. Out bounds a lead-gray Slug that blows away, That bird you'd curse Now no grudge to nurse 'cause that big cock's sanguine-spoutin'. You watch him fall down, where he's mauled By a big dog's rav'nous snoutin' John A Barry |
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Subject: RE: Song Challenge: The Big Cock Randy Mountain From: Georgiansilver Date: 04 Sep 23 - 02:32 PM From the here and here the women I had, I really wasn't countin. I had them all and made 'em squall, On my big cock randy Mountain. |
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