BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale

Subject: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,Evil Twin
Date: 01 Feb 04 - 01:10 PM

Chongo Chimp's quite quick'n slick
but this Banana's a Boner-fide Dick.
Just pull the peelins off my Whongo
And omyGODness ... bye bye Chongo!


WELL? Go right ahead and see for yerself!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZIP!

:-O


Toldja!

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Feb 04 - 01:30 PM

More! More!

Omigod, you should be writing for Reader's Digest!

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,Arch Monkey
Date: 01 Feb 04 - 02:22 PM

I'm a sharp detective not defective with sharp invective for you
Number one species to toss my feces stay low when I chuck my pooh
When you're in the house you dirty louse don't gripe or grouse about me
I'm on the case, carrying mace so shut yo face and let me be

He plays the bongo He's from the congo, his name is chongo the chimp
A real straight shooter a howling hooter his own horn tooter no gimp
If you cross this monkey you better be spunky or you'll be his flunky and say
That he's a screamer when he rides his beamer a bung hole reamer today

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,Evil Twin
Date: 01 Feb 04 - 05:40 PM

Screamin 'n reamin 'n beamin? Yer dreamin!
Chongo's b'n Whongoed 'n wooed
A-howlin 'n hootin 'n hornin 'n tootin
This Banana'll be Archin fer YOU!

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Feb 04 - 05:44 PM

Word!

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,Cheryl the Chimp
Date: 02 Feb 04 - 12:45 AM

I'm Cheryl the virtual girl chimp
You banana boners are so truly wimp
If there's no swing in your arms
Then you aint got no charms
And you're merely a hairy old blimp

Its time to get down from the trees
You need more than bananas to please
you can beat your big chest
And act like a pest
But, chongos, did you know cherries please?

Truly I just don't care how big your 'nana is
Or even how bony or full of fizz
What's getting to me
Is how often I see
Little chongos obsessed with their jiggy jigs

The gorilla I'm seekin' to ride
Offers more than banana to his bride
He'll sweep me off my feet (alright, hands then)
With some whisperings sweet
And wrap me up right by his side..

So if you want a female that's hairy
And not just any Gwen Sue or Mary
First give me a thrill
Don't just make me feel ill,
Or you might find me seething and scary….

Cheryl

(and her sisters Beryl and Meryl..)

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,Evil Twin
Date: 02 Feb 04 - 10:37 AM

Oh Cheryl, sweet Cheryl, have I got a barrel
of Monkey Machismo for you!
Cum Meryl 'n Beryl 'n Harol' 'n Daryl
There's nuthin I won't stick it to!

I proudly profess that my penile prowess
will jangle YOUR jungle like jelly!
You'll be so blessed those big blumps on your chest
Will be Loathe to lift offa this belly!

I'm Whongo the Wimp, and I ain't no blimp
These sinews are S-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n for you!
And if you don't wanna just bong this Bananna
Reach down for a kiwi or two.

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,Evil Twin
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 11:20 AM

Mudcat's wild? HA! Buncha wussies
Y'all backed off like scaredy-pussies!
One wee whiff of Whongo's whip
Ya freeze 'n flail 'n feint forthwith!

So back to skewerin' sleazy species
I'm sicka simperin' feline feces.
I got my Chongo, so here's my Song-o
Don't e'er forget this well-hung Whongo!


Singalong Lyrics: Wild Women of Wongo

Done by the Tubes

From the foggy woggy banks
of the Limpopo River,
there come the sounds of
Female ecstasy (I shiver),
Wet and wanton, their cries
caress by swollen ears, with building
fears, of this forsaken land of years ....

Wongo. Wild Women of Wongo.
How does their song go?
Make a me wan mo, (Wild Women!)
Wongo. No man can say no.
Wild Women of Wongo.
How does their song go?
Like this...

On the dank, steaming shores of Wongo;
its black sand beaches so bongo.
Patterned with leech-ridden creatures;
bodies branded with cicatrix features
that once screeched through the
Heart of the Congo.
Stacked and berserk
they tower and flail all about.

Wailing sounds in tongues only ancient
insects would understand or figure out.
Wild, willing, wenches; strutting and
struggling, as they yank hanks of hair,
rooting and rutting in heat,
as the earth heaves beneath their feet.

And so on and on the lores of Wongo go,
throughout the sands of time.
Singing their song of love, so rare,
To only the chosen ones who dare.
The course of events, time after time.
The tradition remains the same.
A bloodcurdling scream, one of pure
ecstasy, rings out; then it came ---
The ultimate sacrifice.
Their wasp waisted figures twitch and twine,
their sting is lethal, and I know I'm in for mine.

How can I resist this onslaught of love;
from over, from under, from behind and above.
I wish I could be their Wongo King ---
If only I knew the song to sing.

Wongo.

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,beryl & meryl
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 10:59 AM

What you need, Mr Wongo, with all due respect
is an injection of valium or two
a bucket of ice
would be very nice
your blood pressure's flying up too

sit back, relax, your eyelids are drooping
and other parts are doing as well
that valium's seekin
to inhibit your peekin'
at anything rhyming with jell

relax and calm down
and have a warm milk
take up knitting
it'll channel your nerves
cultivate roses
and contemplate moses
and stop thinking of Cheryl's big curves..

as the valium takes over
your hysteria's over
the big Chimp in White Coat's at the door
as he leads you out gently
you're wondering (mentally)
whether you just mightn't sleep on the floor...

(Berl & Meryl go feral..)

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 01:33 PM

I keep hoping this thread will disappear off the end, but it seems that somebody is convinced that their drivel has merit.
John

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: GUEST,pRetty pRhyme-ate
Date: 06 Feb 04 - 08:41 AM

To the Wilds of the Wongo waft the cries of the Congo
They're callin' their Boner-fide King
"Return, Evil Twin! Come Whong us again!"
... but Whongo's got new dongs to ding.

Beryl and Meryl are vexed he's so virile
And Johnny just jabbers and jibes 'im,
The rest of you shiver and shudder and quiver
So scared of your hornies you hide 'em.

He's Whongo the Wimp! He's long, never limp
'Nough valium to dam up Niagara
Still couldn't dampen his verve or his vampin
(Or vie with his vault of Viagra!)

Subject: RE: BS: My Banana's a Dick -- a Wongo Wimp tale
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Feb 04 - 09:12 AM

Look, guys..."Longo Limp" would be a whole lot funnier, don't you think?   Anyway, Chongo is flattered that you care. He'll be glad to give you a good kick in the coconuts any old time at all. Just drop by.