BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Allan C.
Date: 04 Apr 04 - 02:46 PM

Freda, it seems to me that all the groovy, eco-minded folks I ever met in the past three decades have been familiar with the "If it's yellow..." rhyme. I doubt the expression originated with that song. However, I'd like to hear it sometime.

Speaking of toilets, I utterly despise those lid covers Art mentioned. Such things are abominations. They nearly always make it impossible to prop the lid and seat up. Although this may not be an issue for guys who can hold their goods with one hand and pee while using the other to hold up the seat, there are some of us who need both hands for the former purpose.

FWIW, my dream house will have a toilet, a bidet and a urinal!

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 04 Apr 04 - 02:56 PM

KISS....Keep it Simple Sweetie!

Michelle

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Charmion
Date: 04 Apr 04 - 03:09 PM

What I learned from my dear old sergeant:

1. Time spent in reconnaissance is seldom wasted.
2. Arrive five minutes early and mark your map.
3. Any damned fool can be uncomfortable.
4. Brown liquor always costs more than white liquor.

What I learned from my dad:

5. Never leave stuff in the gangway.
6. When the fight starts, get under the table.

What I learned from my mother:

7. If you tidy up, you will find it.
8. Start tidying your room by piling everything on the bed. That way, you can't quit until the job is done.
9. Whatever your face looks like at 40, you're responsible.
10. Always smile at police constables.

And the three rules that everyone should obey:

1. Never play poker with a man named Doc;
2. Never eat at a place called Mom's; and
3. Never go to bed with anyone whose problems are worse than your own.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,freda
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 12:55 AM

..these are all very helpful, but the real problem is those lessons that keep happening, because i won't learn them.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Nelson Algren
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 02:47 AM

Eh, Charmion.

I like your lists, but I was the guy who wrote the last 3.
The way I have 'em is:

1. Never play CARDS with a man named Doc.
#2 is fine.
3. Never go to bed with SOMEONE whose problems are worse than your own.

But thanks for thinking of me, Charmion. Nice to know my work endures in some form.

NA

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 03:42 AM

Peter T, I am in complete agreement with your list! Much good sense there, and I will add it to my own growing list, which I'm happily stealing from the rest of you!!

Freda, I learned that little saying somewhere sometime, but not as a song. I didn't know it WAS a song, but I love the idea that it is!..x..e

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Charmion
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 07:10 AM

Nelson, old bean, you're one hell of a typist for a guy who died in 1981. Indeed, I should have footnoted you -- in fact, I usually do, but neglected to on this occasion (and this occasion only) because the phone was ringing and the cat wanted to go out so I pressed the "Submit Message" button untimely early. Cringing apologies.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: SueB
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 02:41 PM

No good deed goes unpunished.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amos
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 02:51 PM

The most frequently useful lesson of all time, I think, must be Illegitimi non carborundum. I am sure it was written by Horace or some other ancient Roman garage mechanic.

A

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 05 Apr 04 - 07:48 PM

Ther are so many others who can express thoughts better than I. Here are a few.

"You are not old until regrets take the place of dreams" John Barrymore

"All human beings should try to learn before they die
what they are running from, and to, and why." James Thurber

"No snowflake ever falls in the wrong place" Zen saying

"Never trust a naked bus driver." Jack Douglas


Stephen Lee

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Ingrid Frances Stark
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 12:20 AM

Amos, the way my father always said it was "illigitimate non tu carborundum", which loosely translates as "don't let the ba***rds wear you down"

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Ingrid Frances Stark
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 12:29 AM

Listen.

Think.

Breathe.

Touch the ones you love.

Always carry a pen, a journal, and a book to read.

IFS

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Partridge
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 07:10 AM

Don't lie to yourself

Don't live in the past

Validate those you love on a regular basis

Be free with hugs

Pat xx

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 07:29 AM

Thanks Partridge..adding yours to my ever-growing list..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amos
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 09:05 AM

Quite right, Ingrid. Wise man, your father! The Latin is completely bogus,, so having an implicit indirect object is forgiveable, I hope; but the sentiment is completely 100% pure sooth!

A

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Lilyfestre
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 11:54 AM

Today I learned:

Trust no one.

Smile pretty and watch your back.

Michelle

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Jawbone
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 01:49 PM

1. Keep a good head and always carry a lightbulb
2. Half the people can be part right all of the time, some of the people can be alright part of the time, but all the people can't be alright all of the time.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amos
Date: 06 Apr 04 - 08:41 PM

If I should live to a ripe old age
The only lesson I may ever learn
Is to not stand so close to that flame of love
Unless you are willing t o get burned

Love! Love, love love!
Nobody ever understands
All the things that go
Between a woman and a man.

"Love, Love, Love" --

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Kent Davis
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 12:41 AM

Always finish what you

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 12:54 AM

Not trusting ANYONE is a form of mental illness. Trusting everyone is a form of either great innocence or great naivete. The middle path is always best. The extremes in life, like the pendulum's swing, serve to remind one to always return to the middle path.

Or to put it another way: If you find you can't trust anyone, you're obviously hanging around the wrong people. I've met a few I could trust.

But if you were to ask Bob Dylan about it, he said:

Trust yourself,
Trust yourself to do the things that only you know best.
Trust yourself,
Trust yourself to do what's right and not be second-guessed.
Don't trust me to show you beauty
When beauty may only turn to rust.
If you need somebody you can trust, trust yourself.

Trust yourself,
Trust yourself to know the way that will prove true in the end.
Trust yourself,
Trust yourself to find the path where there is no if and when.
Don't trust me to show you the truth
When the truth may only be ashes and dust.
If you want somebody you can trust, trust yourself.

Well, you're on your own, you always were,
In a land of wolves and thieves.
Don't put your hope in ungodly man
Or be a slave to what somebody else believes.

Trust yourself
And you won't be disappointed when vain people let you down.
Trust yourself
And look not for answers where no answers can be found.
Don't trust me to show you love
When my love may be only lust.
If you want somebody you can trust, trust yourself.


I trust myself...and a few other people too.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: jacqui.c
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 06:54 AM

LH - Michelle had a bad time recently - see 'they said I couldn't thread' which is why her list is as it is. Gut reaction produced that.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 04:45 PM

Life is uncertain... eat dessert first!

Singing is one of the few pleasures in life that is not illegal, immoral or fattening. (same goes for dancing & making music)

Know when to say "no". (Am working hard on this one.)

No matter how hard you try/what you do, there will always be some people who do not like you.

Just because someone doesn't spell well, doesn't mean they're not smart.

I would rather have a bad job & a good boss than a good job/bad boss.

Life is what happens while you're making other plans. (My (Russian) Grandfather's version of this: Man plans; God laughs.)

Don't be afraid to ask questions -- even "stupid" ones. ("Even though your answer may be wrong, my question will be right."
from Hal David's song "Question Me An Answer" in the movie "Lost Horizons")

My two favorites:
If someone is nasty or unkind, it is almost always because they are insecure/feel threatened.

Never underestimate the power of expressing your appreciation.

And finally:
There are not enough hours in the day to read *all* the Mudcat threads you want to read!

cheers,

YY

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Midchuck
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 05:06 PM

Singing is one of the few pleasures in life that is not illegal, immoral or fattening. (same goes for dancing & making music)

Nothing is immoral that does not involve harming someone else, depriving them of their rights or freedoms, or breaking trust with them. I concede that many things are illegal that involve none of the above.

If your government tries to impose purely arbitrary rules on you, that have no connection to the above standards, you should probably tell them to bugger off, and find a better government, if you have that option. If your God tries to impose purely arbitrary rules on you, that have no connection to the above standards, you should probably tell Him to bugger off and find a better God, or possibly Goddess, and you always have that option.

Peter.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 05:22 PM

"Immoral" and "illegal" are terms that are based upon and reinforced by a consensus of strangers. "Fattening" is something you can decide about for yourself without a consensus. There is your personal freedom in a nutshell.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Apr 04 - 05:28 PM

Yeah, okay, I see. My condolences to Michelle for the bad treatment she has received.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: JulieF
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 07:42 AM

A selection from the list I carry with me


Accept praise - they are not ALL taking the ....

Its usually not your fault



Julie

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 09:21 AM

I forgot this one....

All things in moderation...including moderation..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Kim C
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 10:14 AM

People who say "I would never want to hurt you" are lying through their teeth, because if they really DIDN't want to hurt you, they wouldn't.

Don't be afraid of the sound of your own voice.

Something you always wanted to learn? Just do it. You have nothing to lose. If it's not for you, it's all right - at least you gave it a try and found out.

You're never too old.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amos
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 10:20 AM

Kim:

Communication between folks being as complex and ambiguous as it often is, why do you think it is not possibe to inadvertently hurt someone even though intending them good?

A

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Kim C
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 11:58 AM

That's true, Amos, but that isn't exactly what I meant. Sometimes we do accidentally hurt people we don't want to hurt. In my own personal experience, people who have said to me, out loud, "I would never want to hurt you," usually followed that with a big BUT. What they really meant was, "I don't really WANT to hurt you but I'm not going to go out of my way not to, because it isn't that important."

That's how it's happened to me, anyway. I realize others' mileage may vary. :)

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amos
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 12:16 PM

OK, got it. Sometimes I feel like running around apologizing for all testosterone everywhere, but I reckon that would accomplish very little. I suppose there is also a formulation in the works that starts "I don't WANT to be hurt by your thoughtlessness, BUT... " which is, of course, a different, if comparable, problem.

A

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 12:39 PM

JulieF,

Good ones! Do we get to hear any more?

Midchuck: Nothing is immoral that does not involve harming someone else, depriving them of their rights or freedoms, or breaking trust with them. I concede that many things are illegal that involve none of the above.

Guest: "Immoral" and "illegal" are terms that are based upon and reinforced by a consensus of strangers. "Fattening" is something you can decide about for yourself without a consensus. There is your personal freedom in a nutshell.

OK, fair points... but I'd like to point out that I started off with more light-hearted, slightly flip "lessons" before moving on to more serious ones (& finishing up "light" again), so please keep that in mind.

Cheers,

YY

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 12:47 PM

"Sometimes I feel like running around apologizing for all testosterone everywhere"

The problem Amos, is that the ones like you who would really offer to apologize, are never the ones who need to!..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Kim C
Date: 08 Apr 04 - 02:19 PM

Ellen makes a great point! And it isn't just testosterone - I think on the whole, women have been meaner to me than men. I'd like to believe it's just 'cause they're jealous. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Apr 04 - 12:57 PM

One thing for sure...the idiots who give testosterone a bad name are NEVER the ones to apologize for it. There's a good song by a local folksinger about the type called "What An Idiot He Is". I'll see if I can find the lyric somewhere.

You see them going by at a blinding speed on the highway, and the vehciles they drive are almost always black, red, or white. Extreme colours go with extreme behaviour on the road.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Kim C
Date: 09 Apr 04 - 01:03 PM

Taking that into account, let me add another lesson:

Men are not the bad guy. Men, in fact, are pretty cool. I like 'em a lot. Most of 'em, anyhow.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Apr 04 - 01:53 PM

(paraphrased)

"Science has finally determined that the 'missing link' between anthropoid apes and civilized man is.......us"

That excess testosterone stuff used to be an important survival trait when we only had clubs and teeth to fight with....now it is a real problem. 15,000-20,000 years is not nearly long enough for evolution to catch up to technology, and technology may render pondering evolution moot.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: steve in ottawa
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 11:23 AM

Re: bad men -- One worsening factor: it's a survival trait for low status men to always be prepared to break the rules; not so with women. The prisons are disproportionately filled with men for many good reasons.

More on topic:

1. If something is worth doing, it's worth doing wrong. More conservatively stated, that would be: Some things, you just can't get right the first time you try them, and depending on the consequences of not getting it exactly right, it's often worth trying them anyway; you can often learn from failures and partial successes are often very rewarding. Hmmm, that's still not exactly right, is it?

Nine more? Shoot, I'm still trying to digest that last one.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: steve in ottawa
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 11:31 AM

Oh. here's another:

Despair and elation are passing emotions; minimize irrevocable decisions while you're feeling either extreme.

(Yeah, the previous rule was catchier, but I admit: I heard it on the radio.)

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Shlio
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 04:45 PM

Guest LB, I apologise for not replying to your comment sooner, as I was fermenting in the dales of Yorkshire, beyond all civilised internet connections...

THE ONE IMPORTANT RULE - Try to spell peoples' names correctly when you are commenting on their life rules.

Sadly, ignoramus that I am, I have never heard of John Prine.

Shlio (Why do people always get it wrong?)

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amos
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 05:13 PM

Shlio:

Speaking just for those immersed in Ameircan history, they get it wrong because "Shi-lo" is the name of a renowned Civil War (U.S.) battle whereas there is no other referent we know of for the expression "Shlio" other than your esteemed self!

John Prine is a well known Pacific Northwest singer-songwriter, but perhaps does not enjoy the reputation he should internationally.

A

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: steve in ottawa
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 05:37 PM

Shlio, a commercial shown locally relies on one's ability to decipher words, so long as the first and last letters are in the correct positions. It's a rlaely naet pnmeoenhon. That bnieg the csae, why btheor wtih craelufly eaxmiinng the oderr of the mldide leertts?

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 07:15 PM

Never paint shelves when pissed.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 10:14 PM

Ogimod! Heer we go agian wiht taht sitpud bsuiness! Shlio or Shilo? Chicamauga or Chacaimuga? Gettysburg or Geyttsbrug?

Oh...my head hurts.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Midchuck
Date: 10 Apr 04 - 10:15 PM

Never paint shelves when pissed.

Interesting thing about Liz's advice - it's valid whether you give "pissed" the British or US meaning!

P.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Paranoid Android
Date: 11 Apr 04 - 09:58 AM

'Twixt the optimist and the pessimist the difference is droll
The optimist sees the doughnut, the pessimist sees the hole.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Joe_F
Date: 11 Apr 04 - 06:01 PM

1. Everything you do dissipates heat, costs money, and makes crumbs.

2. Only a unique solution need have all the symmetries of the problem.

3. When tempted to make a generalization about Christians, try it out on Communists, and vice versa.

4. Successful systems accumulate parasites.

5. The world goes its way past all who will not partake of its folly.

6. When there's no news in the truth, there's no truth in the news.

7. Better to shut your mouth and be thought a fool than open it and remove all doubt.

8. What sticks to the spoon doesn't get stirred.

9. Imprudent sexual activity completes the life cycles of many pests.

10. Assholes have their uses.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Shlio
Date: 11 Apr 04 - 06:04 PM

I apologise for this paranoia about the spelling of my name (thanks for explaining why it's read wrongly, Amos).

It's my sad fate to have a name that no one spells right the first time. Unfortunately independently-minded parents chose "Ashlie" rather than "Ashley" or "Ashleigh", so I've gone through life being constantly spelled wrong.

And now I choose my own derivative, it turns out to be just as hard to spell...

*Sigh*

(I konw waht taht sdtuy siad auobt wrod oerdr, but tihs is my name )

The most important leson: choose a name that is spelled phonetically!

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: Amergin
Date: 11 Apr 04 - 07:03 PM

I thought John Prine came from Illinois....

But anyways...he doesn't get the credit he deserves as a wonderful songwriter and musician...his songs are always a great joy to sing...

However, he shouldn't be confused with that wonderful shanty singer, John Prawn...

Subject: RE: BS: 10 Lessons I learned In Life
From: GUEST,Guest:Augie
Date: 11 Apr 04 - 09:46 PM

Never attribute to malice that which can be attributed to stupidity