Does size really matter?

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: freda underhill
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 12:52 PM

are you being ironic there LH? - sorry, but these are things i didnt know many years ago - someone will benefit (hence the thread!)

fred

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Rabbi-Sol
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 02:11 PM

Remember the saying of the wise old man.
      
               It's not how long you make it
               It's how you make it long

                                              SOL ZELLER

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 02:35 PM

Who cares if you're only going to give her the tip anyways?

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 03:32 PM

Waitresses tell me the tips are pretty good.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Don Firth
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 04:07 PM

        Doctor comes out of his examining room chuckling.
        His nurse says, "What's so funny?"
        Doctor says, "You've got to see this. The patient I have in there has the smallest penis I've ever seen on a grown man. Not only that, he has the word "little" tattooed on it."
        "What?" says the nurse. "You're kidding!"
         "No," says the doctor, still snickering. "Go take a look."
        The nurse says, "I'll go in and put a couple of new prescription pads on your desk, rummage around a bit, and see if I can get a peek at it."
        She's in there for quite a while, and for several minutes the doctor hears some pretty wild vocalizations. When she finally comes out, she looking a bit disheveled, but she smiling broadly.
         "You didn't see all of the tattoo," she says. "It reads, 'Little Rock, Arkansas International Stud-Muffin's Essential Appendage Competition, Grand Champion, 1998."

Respectfully submitted,

Don Firth

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Cluin
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 07:26 PM

What did the leper say to the hooker?

"Keep the tip."




Sorry, I HAD to post it.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 08:06 PM

Freda, what was the name of that Sydney guy - I had a book about his life years ago - who preached in the Domain about that very thing, and who was persecuted and locked in in mental institutions? Victorian Times era, or 1920's, I think.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 11:02 PM

Robin, that theory has been around for a while. I think I remember first reading about it, in my high school years, in a section of one of David Reuben's books (the Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex *But Were Afraid to Ask series).

SRS

We've had a flamer on the sex topics at Mudcat this week. Let's hope she's gone out for a cigarette.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Once Famous
Date: 23 Aug 04 - 11:16 PM

large clits are truly wonderful.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 06:52 AM

No, this was a real live Aussie who espoused many of the beliefs that Freda mentioned. The book was a small run private publication believe - a copy may be in the National Library - I seem to remember acquiring it in the mid 1970's.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 09:13 AM

large clits Martin. What about making a rhyme if you can find something that rhymes with clits. Go on really think hard!
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,Cretinous Yahoo
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 11:02 AM

In spite of what some women say (those who don't want to hurt your feelings) size does count.

A couple got married, and on their wedding night, she said "You have such a small organ."

He replied, "I didn't expect to be playing it in a cathedral."

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Once Famous
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 12:35 PM

Georgiansilver

You make a rhyme about large clits if you are so enamored with the possibility of one.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Nemesis
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 01:08 PM

One of our local MPs is immortalised(?) in the remembrances of one lady he (allegedly) embraced as being "like having a wardrobe fall on top of you with the key sticking out"

Size does matter then!

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: MBSLynne
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 05:29 PM

No, it's still what you do with it. After all, if you make love like a wardrobe, the key isn't going to make much pleasure is it?

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Joe_F
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 06:17 PM

Q. Of which of Shakespeare's plays are these the nonstandard abbreviations?

1. Dry
2. Wet
3. 3"
4. 6"
5. 9"

A.

1. Twelfth Night
2. A Midsummer Night's Dream
3. Much Ado about Nothing
4. As You Like It
5. The Taming of the Shrew

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 07:24 PM

I thought "Bottom" came into the Midsummer Nights Dream somewhere.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: TS
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 08:09 PM

well kids.....one of my bandmates seems to think size matters, and also thinks his size wasn't enough. We all know that the most decorated of Christmas trees are the smallest...sooooo...of went my bandmate afew mnths ago and decided to get FOUR barbell piercings along the bottem of his manhood. He said it hurt like a living sin to get in, but now atleast 4 women /night want to see it. atleast one of them wants to do more then just see it. So, if size does matter, and its not on your side, decorations also matter...apparently. I am happy to report I have no need for said decorations..haha....Slainte!

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 24 Aug 04 - 11:07 PM

If Bottom came into the Midsummer Nights Dream, I must have missed it, who was she?

Ooops... wrong thread...

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,Mike Rotch
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 07:52 AM

Having a bigger organ doesn't hurt, but the quality of sex is much more important than quantity. Some men think that having big penises make them more manly and better lovers. The truth is that these men lack self-esteem and their self-worth is placed into their penises.

If women feel comfortable with who you are, they will overlook penis size. If you are able to stimulate her with your personality, you need to do the same with your penis.

For women, penises are marvelous toys, and no matter what they look like, they will excite. Whether it is 4, 6, or 8 inches, if used properly, it can satisfy her and give her an evening of passion and lust. The idea is to stay focused on the situation. Don't let your penis take over the night. Let your mind do it.

BTW, the average penis size is 5.5 inches. Breathing a sigh of relief?

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Grateful Ted
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 08:11 AM

Mine's huge so I don't care!

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Wolfgang
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 08:37 AM

the average penis size is 5.5 inches.
Measured when?

Wolfgang

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Grateful Ted
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 08:38 AM

uh oh... Wolfgang has a short one!

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 10:05 AM

Any guy can have a 15 inch penis - it depends on how far up his a******e he starts measuring!

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Joe_F
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 05:54 PM

There is an old joke, of which perhaps the ending will suffice:

"Just a moment, bartender. Where did you measure the cat's tail from?"
"From the asshole."
"Kindly do me the same favor."

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Cluin
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 06:56 PM

Doctor: Have you been taking that Viagra I prescribed you?
Patient: Yessir, half a pill a day.
Doctor: Half a pill won't help you have a good enough erection for sex!
Patient: Doc, I'm 82. I don't care about sex. I just need enough to stop pissing on my shoes.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,Haik
Date: 25 Aug 04 - 08:38 PM

Lucky vaginas.
Carrying deposits from,
Tom and Harry's dicks.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 26 Aug 04 - 12:00 AM

46481 öf amërïcan mën havë bënëfïtëd. Nöw ïs ÿöür chancë tö gët bïggër.

All ördërs arë shïppëd dïscrëëtlÿ. Sö thërë ïs nöthïng tö wörrÿ aböüt.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 26 Aug 04 - 03:45 AM

46481 American men have got bigger..simply by posting on Mudcat....mmmmmmmmmmm

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 26 Aug 04 - 04:49 AM

Size might not make sex better, but it could make it easier - especially when you're rather older and both you and your partner are not as slim, energetic, or gymnastic as you once were !

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,fred miller
Date: 26 Aug 04 - 09:53 AM

everything matters. Obsessing about one thing or another is a way to stay wrapped up in youself instead of wrapped up in somebody else.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Lin in Kansas
Date: 27 Aug 04 - 01:26 AM

Or as Terri Clark sings it on the country stations: (I like the fact that she mentions nearly all the "manly obsessions" here--wealth, hair loss, fancy cars, hunting trophies, etc.--and if girls do lie about whether or not they care, it's only because guys care way too much, IMHO. Please note the verse about "forgetting the cards and flowers you never sent.")

Lin

Girls Lie Too

So she can't go out tonight again
Her sister's sick, she's gotta baby-sit
Yeah, that sounds like a pretty good excuse

Now you didn't hear any of this from me
But things aren't always what they seem
Brace yourself, this may come as a shock to you
Girls lie, too

We don't care how much money you make
What you drive or what you weigh
Size don't matter anyway
Girls lie, too
Don't think you're the only ones
Who bend it, break it, stretch it some
We learn from you
Girls lie, too

We can't wait to hear about your round of golf
We love to see deer heads hanging on the wall
And we like Hooter's for their hotwings too
Other guys never cross our minds
We don't wonder what it might be like
How could it be any better than it is with you

(Repeat Chorus)

Yeah, girls lie, too
We always forgive and forget
The cards and flowers you never sent
Will never be brought up again
Girls lie, too
Old gray sweatpants turn us on
We like your friends and we love your mom
And that's the truth
Girls lie, too
Yeah that's the truth
Girls lie, too

No, we don't care how much hair you have
Yeah, that looks good
Comb it over like that

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,Wendy
Date: 27 Aug 04 - 02:16 AM

Jimmy have an obvious crush on me. And yes he agrees with everything I say. But Johnny has the guts to ask me out, & that really makes all the difference. People are wrong: The size of a man's penis is unimportant. What matters is how big his balls are.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: MBSLynne
Date: 27 Aug 04 - 06:13 AM

Actually, the more I think about this........it probably sounds a bit trite, but his eyes, his hands and his sense of humour are far more important.

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,Fred Miller
Date: 27 Aug 04 - 10:03 AM

70% of women fake orgasm. 70%! Which raises the question, Who cares?

   --unknown comic.

I think it's nice if a woman's breasts are large enough to bring the nipples together, especially for jump-starting. But what probably spoils a lot of sex is the obsessive idea that everyone else is having better sex, all the time. It's not the Olympics. Size may matter to some women more than others, but for most it's not exactly how their business works, so it's like those service deals bundling lots of features that you don't really need. Probably some upsides, like rolling over without a disconnect error, but there are obvious downsides, if you think about it.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Scooby Doo
Date: 28 Aug 04 - 08:59 AM

As long as my man does his duty i am not bothered with what size it is.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Feb 05 - 11:56 PM

I feel bad for all women who think size matters... Big or small pecker the guy will have a great time!

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Cluin
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 02:33 AM

Not if he has trouble touching the sides.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 12:19 PM

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Donuel
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 12:23 PM

Indeed if it is small you can dart in and out very quickly as opposed to huge SUVs that tend to roll over.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: dianavan
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 01:29 PM

When erect, there is very little difference in size.

When flacid it probably matters more to men than to women.

Women care more about being able to achieve orgasm. You don't need a penis of any size to achieve that.

What really matters is if there is an emotional connection.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Cluin
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 03:13 PM

If a man isn't confident about his pecker for whatever reason, that will get in the way of an emotional connection, at least a healthy one.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 03:28 PM

Good point, Cluin! If either partner is experiencing self-doubts or other forms of insecurity, then it will definitely interfere with establishing a good emotional connection and/or satisfying orgasms.

But what we really need here is Shane's input...eh? :-)

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST, Feral Cheryl
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 04:50 PM

I will always remember that time we had together in the bathroom out the back of MacDonald's. Baby, your hot dog is one long wet dream for me. You da man. My man.

your sweatheart

Chazza.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: GUEST,wdyat12
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 04:56 PM

Bigger is better if you know how to use it.

wdyat12

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 05:08 PM

Seems to me this is a question only for the ladies. Any given man has what equipment he has, and has to do the best with it he can, so it's irrelevant. The ladies, at least at certain ages, have some choice.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Rabbi-Sol
Date: 05 Feb 05 - 11:18 PM

To paraphrase Mr. Rumsfeld "You do the job with the equipment that you have, not with the equipment that you wish you had."

                                              SOL ZELLER

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 09:02 AM

Can't complain. We have two kids. Both times she said she had a marvellous time.

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 05:12 AM

99

Subject: RE: Does size really matter?
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 05:12 AM

100! It's mine!