BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....

Subject: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Bobert
Date: 02 Apr 05 - 07:48 PM

Washington, D.C. (AP)

According to sources within the White House Bush has ordered Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld, to have the Department of Defense draw up plans to invadeng and occupy the Vatican.

Depsite earlier reports that the President was planning on running for Pope the invasion scenerio is now very much on the table as according to sources within the church, President Bush wouldn't have recieved but one of the 100 cardinal votes. Though the lone cardinal could not be identified, sources close to the story have admitted that presidential advisor, Karl Rove, has compromising photographs of the lone cardinal.

Over the next few days, the administartion will be laying out it's case against the Vatican. Those charges are expected to revolve around a notion that the Catholic Church is a breeding ground for pedifiles and perverts, links to Al Quida and a nuclear enrichment program.

When asked to comment on the situation the President said, "Ahhh, do they have oil?"

Meanwhile, when questioned about the administartion's plan to invade the Vatican, Senator John Kerry (D-Ma) once again pointed out that the President would rather mess over a billion people than a mere 300 million. Senator Kerry also added that should Congress be asked to weigh in on the Vatican issue that he would support the President.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: dianavan
Date: 02 Apr 05 - 10:27 PM

Oddly enough, I wondered why a billion people of one faith couldn't make this world a better place. Seems to me that so much faith should move mountains and/or politicians to do the right thing.

Bobert, I hate to disappoint you but I doubt very much if Bush wants to Shepherd a flock of sheep. He might, however, be interested in the Vatican treasury and land holdings so that he can 'shore up' his troops.

Don't let Donuel see this or we will have Bush wearing all of the regalia and holding a rosary.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: wysiwyg
Date: 02 Apr 05 - 10:40 PM

Holy oils, yes, they have those. :~)

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Bobert
Date: 02 Apr 05 - 10:54 PM

Yeah, where is Donuel?

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Den
Date: 02 Apr 05 - 11:06 PM

A man died here Bobert, despite what we might think about him. Could we at least let him rest in peace for a couple of days.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Apr 05 - 11:31 PM

No. We can't.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 12:28 AM

Sorry Bobert, but John Ashcroft beat him into town.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: mg
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 01:57 AM

Let's go for it. There has to be oil there somewhere. mg

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Bobert
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 08:06 AM

Hmmmmm, GUEST, Pope John?

Kinda rolls off yer tongue, doesn't it?

B:)

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: GUEST,van lingle
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:12 AM

You just know those bastards are hiding WMD's somewhere in the vatican.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 11:59 AM

Yeah, under their robes.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: DougR
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 03:11 PM

Funny Bobert. Hilarious.

DougR

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 03:31 PM

Well, how farfetched is it? This is a nation under dictatorship by a privileged class, not given to freedom, indifferent to the opinions of its populace, and with as history of torture well-documented. How much more do we need?? They also qualify for Bush doctrine treatment by demonstrably NOT having WMD.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 03:42 PM

The only way to find out for sure if they DO have WMDs or not is to invade, smoke 'em out, kick ass, and take over. What are we waiting for? If it turns out afterward that they didn't have WMDs, well then, we can always justify it by helping them establish a democracy, right?

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 03:59 PM

You may have an important grasp of policy-making, after all, LH. Here I thought you were a pinko scumbag liberal, but you obviously have been studying up.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: dianavan
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:13 PM

Little Hawk - Will girls get to vote?

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:25 PM

Hey, well, sure. After we establish security and freedom in the smoking ruins of what once was a totally undemocratic and male-dominated religious dictatorship, we will make sure that girls get to have all kinds of decision-making powers, just like Condoleeza Rice does. This is not saying we will put a girl in charge of the top position, but we will make sure that girls have a lot more say than they did before we kicked ass at the Vatican. You betcha!

My guess is they don't have anything that can stand up to a cruise missile or an Abrams tank, so this one oughta be a piece of cake.

The girls will also get to wear skirts and that sort of thing, just like in Texas. It's time to end the oppression.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Peace
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:29 PM

But with their husband's permission, of course!

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: mg
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:32 PM

oh heavens the swiss guards already wear skirts. mg

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:33 PM

Well, any good wife respects her husband and does her best to follow his guidance and loving authority, right? It says so in the Bible. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Peace
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 09:38 PM

Little Hawk--you and I are gonna get in BIG trouble for this one.

Yep! On a clear day you can see forever.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:00 PM

It's when the situation looks the blackest that a real leader bears down and makes the hard decisions....

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Bobert
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:03 PM

Usually, in this case, after a night of pretzels....

Jus' say no...

B;)

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:23 PM

I think it's time we had an inspiring song...

Endless Love

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 10:59 PM

If John Ashcroft were to run for Pope, the College of Cardinals would probably do what the people of Missouri did in 2000 and elect the dead guy instead.

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Peace
Date: 03 Apr 05 - 11:29 PM

Bush, Plan. Why do I have trouble seeing these words together?

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 08:40 AM

I see Fidel has announced three days mourning for the Pope in Cuba. That should really get up the Bush's nose...

Subject: RE: BS: Bush Plan to Invade the Vatican....
From: Bobert
Date: 04 Apr 05 - 09:06 AM

Yeah, word on the street is that, fir once, we need to give credit where credit is due. When Bush heard about Fidel announcing 3 days of mourning he called Rumsfeld and told him to prepare to nuke Cuba... Then Karl Rove got wind of it, stuck Georgie Porge in the corner fir a little quiet time and called off the "whack"...

Yeah, even Karl Rove can be right (ahhhh, make that correct) once in a while.

Bobert