BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 10:18 PM

"Oh my my you lot . . . Get a life."

Just one life for the lot?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Charley Noble
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 09:23 PM

Off with all their heads!

Charley Noble, Emperor Emiritus

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 09:15 PM

Teacher's Pest

We're just a bunch of half pissed folkie musos on this forum - you want maturity too?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,Teachers Pest
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 07:19 PM

Oh my my you lot,must have been great not have gone through your teens and gone straight to adulthood.All easy answers and more solutions picked out the air.Sounds like good leaders in the great British tradition to me.Get a life.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 07:50 AM

I vote for the Pubs!

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: freda underhill
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 07:35 AM

Liz the Squeak for Queen. Shambles in charge of requests for information under the Freedom of Information Act. Micca for Ambassador to America. Phot can replace Jack Straw. Peace can replace ken Livingstone.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: akenaton
Date: 09 Mar 07 - 07:11 AM

Seems like most of the suggestions here would provide a most conventional government. Pretty much between Dems and Pubs, Labs and Cons.

To fit into that space we'll all have to go on a strict diet....Ake

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 10:23 PM

If they can't pay, they can work the debt off working for the State. Live in a barracks, costs deducted from earnings. Ditto food, clothing, medical care beyond the minimum, and personal hygiene. Out AT work at 0800, lunch 1200-1230, work 1230 to 1830, two 15 minute breaks per day. Minimum wages, deposited directly to the various accounts.

If you want something you pay in cash, deducted from your account.

Harsh? Sure is. It's one step above temporary slavery and it's intended to be.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 09:39 PM

Free beer for all Musos!

(From the Free Beer Party)

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Scrump
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 10:53 AM

I would threaten all pubs that don't have at least one folk session a week, with closure. That would make some of them get their act together.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rasener
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 10:15 AM

>>However, it just might work. Let's try it. <<

If only :-)

Scrump
Good point that - if all tenneagers had an ASBO, they wouldn't need to be an ASBO

Just think of all these ASBO's helping everybody and never swearing and and and

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Scrump
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 10:06 AM

Some good suggestions Villan.

I think all teenagers should be served with ASBOs as soon as they reach their 13th birthday.

This will help ensure they behave, while at the same time remove the cachet that ASBOs have among teenagers as a "badge of honour". If they all have them, the yobs won't think it's 'cool' to have one and won't bother to deliberately flout the law to 'prove' themselves to their pals, as I understand many do now.

As for criminals, all criminals should have to repay all costs associated with their crime in full. This includes the cost of stolen items (cars, etc.); repairing damaged property; compensation to victims awarded by courts for distress caused; police time to investigate/detect/arrest the criminals; cost of the legal proceedings; and cost of accommodation in jail.

If they can't pay immediately, they will have property removed by distraint (by bailiffs, etc.), and if they don't have the money or property, they should have to pay it back in instalments once they complete their sentence, if necessary by deductions from their benefits.

If students have to pay for their education and get into debt for several years afterwards, I don't see why criminals should get off without paying a penny like they do now.

Perhaps some of them might even think twice before committing crimes in the first place, if they knew they would have to pay financially. There's nothing like hitting someone in the wallet to get a message across, in this day and age.

That was a party political broadcast on behalf of the extremely moderate party :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: kendall
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 09:50 AM

Those are very Draconian measures, Villian. However, it just might work. Let's try it.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rasener
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 07:30 AM

Oh I forgot

Bring back Law & order and give police the authority to deal with all people who don't want to conform with a peaceful and happy UK

I would bring back enforced military service for all ASBO's and all teenagers when they reach the age of 16 for 2 years military service.

I would close all pubs where they can't keep drunken loutishness under order.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rasener
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 07:24 AM

I would like to be in charge of getting rid of all red tape/political correctness/form filling department.
The money saved from getting rid of all these would then go to getting Matron's re-installed in all our hospitals and providing money for more nurses and doctors.
I would make teachers teach instead of having to form fill.
All folk clubs would get funded for all acts that they put on so that we can create more jobs for performers.
I would abolish all the stupid laws that stop live music.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 08 Mar 07 - 02:57 AM

Rapaire
L.H.E.K.O.L.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Mar 07 - 02:51 PM

Rapaire
Lord High Executioner and Keeper of the Lists
for the British Umpire and/or the UK

Yes, it has a nice ring to it.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Scrump
Date: 07 Mar 07 - 07:56 AM

ice tilce 'A' ice you'd beam in hiss trough head uke 'A' shun

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 06 Mar 07 - 06:56 PM

Looks like you kilt this thread...

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: leeneia
Date: 06 Mar 07 - 04:21 PM

I'd like to be in charge of kilts.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Charley Noble
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 09:24 PM

lox-

As I recall the Seychelles have quite a shoreline. In fact there is very little else there. If you are seriously applying to be ambassador to the Seychelles be sure you are capable of saying very rapidly:

Seychelles, Seychelles,
On the sea shore!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 04:01 PM

Actually I've changed my mind - can I be ambassador to the seychelles - of course I'll need a team of secretaries ...


And Wolfgang can be in charge of English language and heritage ...

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Gulliver
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 03:39 PM

Please put me down as Ruler of the Queen's Navy. Despite my handle, I almost never go to sea...

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Ebbie
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 02:52 PM

I nominate Bobert for head of the Department of Peace. Its one rule: Diplomacy, First and Forever.

And Peace, himself, for the Department of Music.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: jacqui.c
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 12:20 PM

How about Geoff the Duck as Minister for Culture! Definitely a colourful figure and would make sure that folkies got their just dues.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,Ricky
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 09:39 AM

Foolestroupe do you really need to ask who the guy was ? of course it was you. I myself never took to the seas. I just like Old Masters and young sailors.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Scrump
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 09:24 AM

That idiot Howell - oops, sorry, I should have just said "Howell" there, but never mind - wass replaced by another idiot - oops, another slip of the keyboard, I meant "person" - namely, Tessa Jowell.

The job must be favoured by people whose names rhyme with "bowel" for some reason.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: JennyO
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 09:21 AM

all the pies you can eat

Pie? You want PIE?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,The Barden of England at work
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 09:16 AM

I nominate CHONGO CHIMP as culture minister. Much better than that idiot Howell.
John Barden

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Scrump
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 08:02 AM

Yes, I thought Deputy PM would be a popular post. No work, free accommodation in luxury, all the pies you can eat and all the women you can [censored by Mudcat]

But doesn't anyone want to be Culture minister? Then you could do something useful for once, by reversing the licencing laws and making folk sessions and gigs compulsory in every pub in the land.

Plenty of paid gigs for all then! :D

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Walrus
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 06:52 AM

Can I put in a bid for Deputy PM please?
After Prezza, there's no work to do ("Tone" doesn't trust him anymore) and the job still draws a Ministerial salary - HEY! WHY SHOULD'T I RIDE THE GRAVY TRAIN FOR ONCE?

Walrus

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: skipy
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 05:54 AM

I.ve got a long frock & a tiara but I don't want to be queen, I want to be enviroment, I'll put a skip on every corner!
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 04:45 AM

So you met her then Ricky...

or are you am old sailor...


BTW, just who was this man she loved?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: jacqui.c
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 04:38 AM

Actually, I'll take any ministerial position that allows me to go on 'fact finding missions', at the taxpayers' expense, for the majority of the time. There are a lot of folk clubs I haven't yet visited and it would be nice to see more of my family along the way.

Travel would have to be first class, of course. Might even get Kendall to come along that way.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GRex
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 04:30 AM

You are all wasting effort on this. Nothing ever comes of Tony BLiar's PR exercises.
         GRex

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: JennieG
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 12:22 AM

A date with a man....yes please!

Can I be queen? I have a tiara and a long frock.

Queen Jennifer The First.......

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: John O'L
Date: 05 Mar 07 - 12:10 AM

Does this mean that any one of us can now do anything we like and justify it by saying that we have a mandate?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,Ricky
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 10:08 PM

Foolestroupe she stopped at Cape Horn and settled there, liked the place a lot, died repenting at her loss of the man she loved.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:55 PM

I had an irish affair once, but she ran off witha sailor...

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,Ricky
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:51 PM

There has to be a minister for Irish affairs, doubt we could find one on this site !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:45 PM

How much to NOT be on your list Rapaire?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:35 PM

Hey, that's where MY job would come in!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:32 PM

"This here gonna be a gummint with separation of church and state?"

Well, we can ensure separation of head and corpora...

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 04:43 PM

Penelope Rutledge for reigning monarch! Winston Wellington-Jones for royal consort. It's time to get those boring dullards, the Royals, replaced by someone far more entertaining and give the British press something to really get worked up about!

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Scrump
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 03:49 PM

i wonna b minnista ov edewcayshun pleez i gott maw kwolliffickayshuns dan dat bloke jonsun

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: wysiwyg
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 03:12 PM

This here gonna be a gummint with separation of church and state? (YES)

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: kendall
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 02:39 PM

Leadfingers for Ambassador to America.
John in Kansas for minister of education

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 01:37 PM

Department of Employment - SINSULL

Diplomatic Service - Catspaw

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 12:54 PM

I wanna be Lord High Executioner. (I have a little list.)

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 12:20 PM

I want to be in charge of Import/Export please.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: GUEST,lox
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 10:52 AM

Can I be chief whip   ;'D

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Alba
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 10:17 AM

I wouldn't go to the shops for a pint of milk for Tony Boy if he begged me too...so he can F&*% off and fix the mess he made himself...we told him what we thought and how to fix it and he did not listen so...! *BG*
Jude

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 10:04 AM

So long as we joe clones can still be useful and a non ee mouse. **BG**

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Length
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 09:51 AM

Still so many ministerial seats still empty

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 09:51 AM

I thought you'd appreciate that, Kendall. She looks even more radiant these days, whatever you're doing, it works.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 09:14 AM

The Length - are you saying that you are as entertaining as John Prescott? Not something I'd admit to.

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: kendall
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 09:10 AM

Subtle, George, real subtle. LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:46 AM

Joe Offer for Prezza.

eric

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 08:37 AM

No Teribus for Foreign Secretary - I want some experience as a wartime leader!

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 07:37 AM

Shambles for Minister of Culture
Kendal for Foreign Affairs
InOBU for Justice & also for Immigration
HergaKitty for Transport
Teribus for Home Secretary

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: kendall
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 07:17 AM

Liz my dear, I love you for that but, if you remember a line from the old movie "THEM" I say<

MAKE ME A SARGENT IN CHARGE OF THE BOOZE."

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Tweed
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 07:13 AM

Dammit Liz.....this is important stuff.

Try to be a bit more serious!

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 07:05 AM

The only way you'd ever get a stable government is if you follow Caligula's example and elect horses.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 06:16 AM

You did want a stable Government, or are you trying to outdo the Italians?

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: eddie1
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 05:44 AM

Can I humbly propose myself for "Minister of Single Malts, Vice and General Incompetence" I'm very good at all of these!

Eddie

Subject: RE: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 05:42 AM

Kendall for King!

LTS

Subject: BS: Blair invites Mudcat to form government
From: The Length
Date: 04 Mar 07 - 04:53 AM

Tony Blair has decided he had enough.
After meeting the Queen he said "The next government of the United Kingdom should be formed by mudcat members" (he loves the site).

George Bush rang him late last night and said "Tony, love the idea, I visit the site daily, I look upon it as a fan club, think I will stand down too, seeing I also made a balls up of this country". I also want to see Mudcat members run the White House.


So now folks and folkies, the official election for number 10 in the UK has just opened, and the empty seat in the White House needs filled. We need to form two honest trustworthy crews of men and women to run these two fine nations.

Please publicly cast your vote.

Prime Minister/President =

All Ministerial positions available =


All Secretarial positions available =


Position of Minister for entertainment "The Length" or John Prescott"