BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 01:03 AM

Well it has been awfully windy in Waikiki the past few days....

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: katlaughing
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 12:59 AM

Once was a time when Spawdarlin' was known for much more than certain elements of air...Cletus, the Reg boyz, Pa and all of their shenanigans, as well as great doings over at the NYCFTTS, and playing out back of the Tavern with the faeries, kicking up all the litter. He had a marvelous hand in dressing the Heron - Waylon Jennings, something to do with Flaming Kestrels, and was a really hot ticket at the Juke Joint. Maybe if we all close our eyes, think about those other times, and click our heels, and say, "There's no one like Spaw, there's no one like Spaw"...well, just maybe we'll get another story or two outta him.

luvyaSpawdarlin'...kat

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: The Pooka
Date: 31 Aug 02 - 09:38 PM

It's not about whacking Iraq & bombing Saddam. It's for a much higher purpose: saving the world. So here it is 'Cats, excerpted from cnn.com (emphases added): the really-real inside Poop on our hero Spaw's secret mission -- knocking our rocks off, as it were.
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Would giant air bag stop killer space rock?
August 31, 2002 Posted: 2:59 PM EDT (1859 GMT

By Richard Stenger, CNN

(CNN) -- Some scientists have suggested nuclear bombs to deflect a big comet or asteroid from a collision course with our planet. One researcher has a more novel solution: a giant air bag...

...computer simulations indicate that [an atomic] blast could split an incoming asteroid or comet into more fragments that remain on a collision course.

Hermann Burchard of Oklahoma State University in Stillwater thinks a big air bag could take care of such a cosmic "beanbag."

The mathematician proposes that a spacecraft could approach the object and **inflate a bag several kilometers wide using a chemical reaction to make gas.**

The probe would then push the bag against the incoming asteroid or comet. The bag would distribute pressure evenly and nudge the object away without fragmenting it, Burchard suggested.

"It seems a safe, simple and realistic idea," he told UK-based New Scientist magazine. "Mylar, perhaps, would be tough enough for the job."....

...."The basic idea makes sense. If a comet or asteroid is spotted with enough advance warning, then a small nudge in the right direction will change its course enough so that by the time it reaches Earth's vicinity it will fly by without colliding," said NASA's Dave Williams.

"So the air bag isn't a crazy idea. It's definitely plausible, although technically tricky, I'd imagine," said Williams, who works for the agency's National Space Science Data Center in Greenbelt, Maryland.
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Mr Spaw sir, all humanity will be in your debt when that superwide gasbag tumesces to yer chemical reactions & the BigAsteroid gives in with a sigh to your mighty Probe. In the Long Generations your fame will go down, as the world sings the Ballad of Old 49. Gawd bless ye man.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 04:07 AM

Well, as I've been on sabbatical and Morty has thrown in the (paper) towel, he'd been too busy coping alone with the plumbing at the NYCFTTS to post here!
RtS

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Bill D
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 10:38 PM

you cain't put jello in a hot tub! Jello goes on the trampoline!...In the hot tub, you use Mazola!

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: artbrooks
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 09:06 PM

Actually, I have it on good authority that he sent his kids off to summer camp and locked himself up with his Lady, a hot tub full of strawberry jello, and a case of large economy size cans of Reddy Whip.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Cobble
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 07:26 PM

Could Spaw doing all these Farting Tests be the reason the planet is warming up.

Gasseous Cobble.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Mr Red
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 05:19 PM

I heard the reports!
so why does he have all this on his hands?

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: SINSULL
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 05:04 PM

Spaw has been posting but where in the world is Cletus? He hasn't paid us a visit recently.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: EBarnacle1
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 04:51 PM

He hasn't been absent, just where you haven't been seeking him. He has posted several times recently.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Fortunato
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 03:54 PM

I think he went to shit and the hogs ate him.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Genie
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 03:35 PM

Well, in any event, maybe his absence is just a passing phase.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Bert
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 03:52 AM

Actually our Spaw can create more energy than that with one toot.

He's just holding his breath!

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: The Pooka
Date: 29 Aug 02 - 03:08 AM

Heh heh heh...gives a hole new meaning to poison-gas warfare... "Boom! Doom!" - JRR Tolkien

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: X
Date: 28 Aug 02 - 10:37 PM

The living will envy the dead.

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: paddymac
Date: 28 Aug 02 - 10:32 PM

Now don't be thumpin' on the boy too hard, lest he aim one in your direction. Pay 'em no mind, 'Spaw, we love you for being, umm, er, "unique in mudland". :-)

Subject: RE: BS: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: michaelr
Date: 28 Aug 02 - 08:28 PM

That should trump any biological weapons Saddam has in his ARSEnal...

Subject: The Real Reason for Spaw's Silence!
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 28 Aug 02 - 07:46 PM

I just happened upon this tidbit of information while searching for something totally unrelated:

If a person 'passes wind' consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Source: Bizzarro)

The implications are obvious! Catspaw49 has been off secretly working on his own weapons-of-mass-destruction program! As if Spaw flatulence wasn't deadly enough in the first place, save 'em up for seven years and you've got a first-class nuclear device on your hands!

Do we tell Dubya? Or maybe he already knows! Maybe Spaw's the secret weapon Dubya's preparing to launch against Iraq! Oh my God! The humanity! Spaw farts! A fate worse than death!