Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: GUEST,Big Al Whittle Date: 17 Oct 12 - 02:29 AM Nick Toczek is a performance poet - he has written a whole book of performance poems for children called Kick it. I see on Amazon - you can get a used copy for a penny! Highly recommended! http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/reader/0330399209/ref=sr_1_4?p=S003&keywords=nick+toczek&ie=UTF8&qid=1350454943#reader_0330399209 |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Richard from Liverpool Date: 16 Oct 12 - 08:52 AM The History of Football (words above) is a great song, but having seen a Watt Nicoll songbook, I'm pretty certain it was by Watt Nicoll rather than Hamish Imlach (although Imlach did of course sing it) |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Jack Campin Date: 16 Oct 12 - 07:24 AM There is a new collection from Ian Black, "Two More Andy Gorams". |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: GUEST,The History of Football (Hamish Imlach) Date: 16 Oct 12 - 06:56 AM From my memory, History of Football From Ireland, there came a band, 100 years ago they said. At a birthday feast, for the Chief McLeish, they were booked to play. They wore green hats, green spats and green cloaks I think. The thing they were not green on was the sharing of the drink. The Chief McLeish he was pleased when he came to his seat. For it was said his wife had baked a very special treat. He wore blue plaid, blue braid, a blue kilt I suppose, The only thing that was not blew he never blue his nose. The guests gasped when at last the treat was finally brought. On wooden plate, a steamin great Dumpling pippin hot. Well he grabbed it, stabbed it, but the dumpling stayed in tacked Till the chief McLeish none too pleased, give it a terrible crack. Well the fiddler stopped the dumpling with an Irish roar of pain. He yelled and swore, then once more, kicked it back again. It went up and down the banquet hall, 80 wide a 100 lang Kicked between the clan McLeish and the Irish Ceilidh band. Their anger turned to laughter, when they saw this could be fun. And their laughter turned to anger, when they say the wrong side won. They still play this game today, but they changed the rules somehow. With a 11 dumplings on each side, and they call it football now. |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Jim Dixon Date: 11 Mar 04 - 03:32 PM "What It Was Was Football" by Deacon Andy Griffith, as he called himself in those days, is not a poem or song but a prose monologue, a story told from the point of view of a rube who knows nothing about football, seeing his first game. It was first released on both sides of a 78-rpm record. The text has been posted by Spaw here. |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Beardy Date: 11 Mar 04 - 06:43 AM You could also try 'Ear-wig-o' by the glorious Les Barker. |
Subject: Lyr Add: THE FOOTBALL REFEREE (Matt McGinn) From: GUEST,Pat Date: 10 Mar 04 - 03:17 PM This is a cracker .. THe Football Referee by Matt McGinn ( see www.mattmcginn.info ), and check if mudcat has it, perhaps ? I think this is on The Best of Matt McGinn Chorus Why did I ever become a football referee? I could have been an engineer or a sailor on the sea. Wherever there's a fault to find they always pick on me. Why did I ever become a football referee? I used to play at centre half when I was very young, In speaking out for fair play I never could hold my tongue. The men at the top were watching and they quickly spotted me. They says, 'Now there is a decent man, we'll make him a referee.' When first I took my whistle out I did feel very proud, I played it like a fluter and I smiled at all the crowd, I gave them two decisions and I heard a terrible boo, Then fifty-thousand voices roared 'Coconuts to you'! When Rangers played the Celtic, I was stuck out on the field, I'd only been there a minute or two when the crowd began to squeal. The half o' them said 'He's a Fenian fae the heart o' Ireland.' The others said, 'He's a bluenose and he's there by the shake o' the hand.' The game had gone on half-an-hour when two began to fight I tried to separate them and to tell them who was right. They bashed me and they battered me and they left me nearly lame, The crowd a' roared out, 'Bury him! and let's get on with the game.' They brought me out to Italy as a very honoured guest, Between Milan and Roma, I did my level best. But the crowd they didna fancy me -I could tell by the way they spieled. They hired a helicopter to take me oot o' the field. |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: pavane Date: 10 Mar 04 - 12:07 PM It's called the History of Football, but I can't find the lyrics anywhere. |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: pavane Date: 10 Mar 04 - 11:56 AM There is good one on the origins of football. I think it was by Hamish Imlach but I can't remember the title, just a few words. Concerning two sides at a meal, chasing a lost dumpling The two sides were green and blue (of course) 'The only thing that wasna' blue was they never blew their nose..' and 'The thing they weren't 'agreen' on was the sharing o the booze' and 'There's 11 dumplings on each side & they call it footba' now' |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetr From: dick greenhaus Date: 10 Mar 04 - 12:14 AM The DT has "Fitba' Crazy" |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Gareth Date: 09 Mar 04 - 07:03 PM Given the defenition of Football 'ere in South Wales dare I bring the name of Max Boyce to your attention. "Live at Treorchy" And "We all had Doctors Papers" (LPS or Tape) might suit ! Any specific requests I will try to transcribe. Gareth (Who knows - 'Cos he was there !) |
Subject: Lyr Add: GOALKEEPER JOE (Marriott Edgar) From: Long Firm Freddie Date: 09 Mar 04 - 06:11 PM There's Goalkeeper Joe by Marriott Edgar: Goalkeeper Joe Joe Dunn were a bobby for football He gave all his time to that sport, He played for the West Wigan Whippets, On days when they turned out one short. He'd been member of club for three seasons And had grumbled again and again, Cos he found only time that they'd used him, Were when it were pouring with rain! He felt as his talents were wasted When each week his job seemed to be No but minding the clothes for the others And chucking clods at referee! So next time selection committee Came round to ask him for his sub He told them if they didn't play him, He'd transfer to some other club. Committee they coaxed and cudgelled him But found he'd have none of their shifts So they promised to play him next weekend In match against Todmorden Swifts. This match were the plum of the season An annual fixture it stood, 'T were reckoned as good as a cup tie By them as liked plenty of blood! The day of the match dawned in splendour A beautiful morning it were With a fog drifting up from the brick fields And a drizzle of rain in the air. The Whippets made Joe their goalkeeper A thing as weren't wanted at all For they knew once battle had started They'd have no time to mess with the ball! Joe stood by the goal posts and shivered While the fog round his legs seemed to creep 'Til feeling neglected and lonely He leant back and went fast asleep. He dreamt he were playing at Wembley And t'roar of a thundering cheer He were kicking a goal for the Whippets When he woke with a clout in his ear! He found 'twere the ball that had struck him And inside the net there it lay But as no one had seen this 'ere 'appen He punted it back into play! 'Twere the first ball he'd punted in anger His feelings he couldn't restrain Forgetting as he were goalkeeper He ran out and kicked it again! Then after the ball like a rabbit He rushed down the field full of pride He reckoned if nobody stopped him Then 'appen he'd score for his side. 'Alf way down he bumped into his captain Who weren't going to let him go by But Joe, like Horatio Nelson Put a fist to the Captain's blind eye! On he went 'til the goal lay before him Then stopping to get himself set He steadied the ball, and then kicked it And landed it right in the net! The fog seemed to lift at that moment And all eyes were turned on the lad The Whippets seemed kind of dumbfounded While the Swifts started cheering like mad! 'Twere his own goal as he'd kicked the ball through He'd scored for his foes 'gainst his friends For he'd slept through the referee's whistle And at half time he hadn't changed ends! Joe was transferred from the West Wigan Whippets To the Todmorden Swifts, where you'll see Still minding the clothes for the others And chucking clods at referee! Marriott Edgar LFF |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Scabby Douglas Date: 09 Mar 04 - 06:02 PM Or for a Scottish slant, have a look for a book by a fella called Ian Black - "Two Andy Gorams"... |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: maire-aine Date: 09 Mar 04 - 05:11 PM You need the Andy Griffith classic WHAT IT WAS WAS FOOTBALL. Just put that phrase in yahoo or google and you'll find a bunch of sites with it. |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: GUEST,Larry K Date: 09 Mar 04 - 11:10 AM The song "A Chat with your Mother" by Berryman & Berryman has a comic verse about football. |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: ced2 Date: 09 Mar 04 - 10:47 AM Leeds Untied! as in undone! |
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: Chris Amos Date: 09 Mar 04 - 01:47 AM Hi, I am lucky enough to work with one of England's foremost Football poets, Richie Hession, you can find examples of his work, and other excellent poets at http://www.footballpoets.org/poets.asp http://www.footballpoets.org/poets.asp good luck Chris |
Subject: Lyr Req: help find comic football rhymes/poetry From: GUEST,Frances Date: 08 Mar 04 - 06:49 PM Hi folks, I am looking for any comic verse etc., about football, or matches. thanks Frances |
Share Thread: |
Subject: | Help |
From: | |
Preview Automatic Linebreaks Make a link ("blue clicky") |