BS: The Archers UK Soap

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Linda Snell
Date: 04 Nov 06 - 08:07 AM

GUEST JOhn: may I suggest you try attending the Adult Literacy Class at the Borchester Community Empowerment Centre. These courses are specifically designeed to cater for poor unfortunates such as yourself.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,jOhn
Date: 04 Nov 06 - 08:09 AM

get stuffed.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 04 Nov 06 - 10:53 AM

Lol!!

I must agree with jOhn though. I get really fed up with this same story line every bloody year. Twice in fact cos we have the Christmas show and the village fete. Can't totally blame Linda Snell...it's been going on since well before she moved into the village


Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: terrier
Date: 04 Nov 06 - 04:09 PM

C'mon, it's not Linda's fault, she only reads the script.
ITS NOT REAL.....is it???

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: IWTATBM
Date: 04 Nov 06 - 04:17 PM

I was in The Bull today. It was empty. I had two pints of Shires and a packet of salted peanuts. Sid looked a bit miserable so i didn't stay for a third. That place is going down hill fast, despite its fancy new carpet and cutains. Oh for the Cat and Fiddle and a bit of sawdust on the floor.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: IWTATBM
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 06:42 AM

Hi there. Can't speak too loud. Am addressing you from behind a bush at the moment, 'cos I've just seen Snelly. Seems she doesn't want me for a dwarf now but wants me to work 'behind the scenes' ("such an important job IWTATBM, perfect for you"). Well I'm not going to be Brian's lackey for no one and am going to tell her straight. Only I'm a bit busy at the moment, you understand. Anyway here she comes. Sshhhhh

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Ancient Briton
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 07:00 AM

You guys are taking your eyes off the ball
Ruth's committed to Oxford
Sam's only a whisker away from pulling it off

Of course Dave's projected meeting with Sophie on 25 Nov is an opportunity for a counter-blow....

Go for it Ruth

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Folkiedave
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 08:47 AM

Will we hear sounds like in Sid and Jolene's shower scene? I do hope so!!

OOOOOh Sam,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 08:54 AM

Is this an under the counter blow?
I think we should be told.
Nah, the aristocracy don't do that sort of thing do they?
G.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Ancient Briton
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 01:56 PM

Only under certain conditions
for example no more than three servants in the room

Is Sophie an aristo? On reflection, she's lusty enough to qualify.
Dave's as common as muck

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: terrier
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 05:09 PM

Now I am sure this is a scam and THE ARCHERS is just a figment of peoples imagination. I was in the Bull on the 4th NOV and IWTATBM was NOT there. The only people in that night were Jolene (of the deep sexy drawl), myself and a strange translucent apparition of a little drummer boy.
Also, I believe that stRUTH and Sam have somehow passed over to the 'other side' because on the BEEB trailers of the ARCHERS (who do NOT exist)their voices now seem to have aquired an unearthly echo-y timbre. Why is there a man in a white coat with his hand on my shoulder.........Get away, it's not me you want........

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: IWTATBM
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 05:53 PM

Not a mention. NOT A MENTION. Well hardly, one little line at the bottom of the back page of the Echo, "…and the winner of the modern tractor ploughing competition was IWTATBM." And old 'Fry-up' (he hates being called that), gets a half-page photo for driving a Dinky toy. Can you believe it? Still, did you see the photo? Caught mid cough with his tongue sticking out - silly old duffer. I don't know why they don't get rid of the engine on them old Fergies and just put in a set of peddles. Oh, and I saw old llama bum and told her straight about the panto, "I'm just not interested Linda, get it?" I said. Then she told me straight and now I'm third assistant backstage director. You know I'm glad I discovered this site. Didn't know why I was always one of the last to know the gossip in the village. And I see you're all using aliases, very wise. I suppose I should have done that, but what the hell, I'm used to taking stick; it's not easy being the only vegetarian in the village. And Terrier, I was in the pub, but took a sharp exit when you waltzed in, on the scrounge as usual. Hang on, someone's shouting me… "You what Bert?.... Oh, a pint of Shires please. You're a true gentlemen me old friend, I've always said so."

Anyway, got to go.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: terrier
Date: 05 Nov 06 - 06:08 PM

Sorry IWTATBM, I wuz in the Ploughmans, must have missed you. As for LLama Bum,well, poor old Persephone would turn in her grave if she heard that.....

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 04:50 AM

I thought Usha was a vegetarian.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 05:44 AM

She eats vicars!
G ¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Thomas Hardy
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 01:19 PM

Now if I was writing the script there'd be more action and less talk
In my day everyday country folk just got on with it - adultery that is - there was no telly you see, and Hindu guilt counsellors were thin on the ground

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 01:59 PM

But in your day Tom, if Ruth were caught in her adultery David could cast her off, she would have no right to see her children if he didn't want to allow her to and she would be a social outcast...even more than Emma is now. It might have given her a little more to base her decision on.

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Folkiedave
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 02:51 PM

Well, it won't be the first affair in the Archers and I don't suppose it will be the last.

Quite an adulterous lot when you think about it.....in fact when I do think about it there is a lot of it about...........

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Bernard
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 02:59 PM

Hello, me old pal, me old beauty...!!

Bring back Walter Gabriel, if only as a flash back...

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Thomas Hardy
Date: 06 Nov 06 - 06:48 PM

....and I certainly never needed to stoop to double-entendres like that to make a living

better get cracking Sam, the vicar's gal is on your case now.

If I were plotting this one the real Laura would turn up at Brookfield whilst Ruth was away and would sweep Dave off his feet. Phil would die of appoplexy and Jill would bake a cake. The kids would go into care then be fostered by Caro and Olly.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: sapper82
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 03:00 PM

And after all the build up, she bottled out.
Suprised Sam didn't throttle her!

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Folkiedave
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 03:42 PM

Really she is still in lurve with Dayveed.............

They will work it out..............eventually.

Good luck to them both.

Mind I would have liked the sound effects from the hotel, the slurping of the champagne.......the pictures are so much better on the radio!

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: greg stephens
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 03:45 PM

Poor old Sam. I think the least Ruth can do is make sure he gets a little bonus in the wage packet this week, that hotel, flowers and champers has got to be a big item for an Old Cow Hand from the Rio Am.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: sian, west wales
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 03:57 PM

Well ... maybe he still will throttle her. It was all a bit of a fizzle but maybe they're just setting us up for What Happens Next. I reckon it's a toss-up between Sam snapping (see 'throttle', above) or a car accident on the way home.

Anyone making book?

sian

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: greg stephens
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 04:05 PM

1) Sam shoots children
2) Sam hangs himself
3) Ruth says "Oooooooooooooh Nooooooooooo"
4) Vaness Whitburn issues new staement, denying that the Archers is being dumbed-down by making people act out of character
5) Bert dies of coughing fit

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Allen in OZ
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 04:09 PM

One of the best episodes of the Archers was that by Tony Hancock
" Hello me old pal, me old beauty"

Aaaargh

AD 1943

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Emma B
Date: 07 Nov 06 - 04:15 PM

"The Bowmen" I remember that - one of the best examples of a mummersetshire accent yet :)

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 02:48 AM

Well Friday's thingy in the Radio Times says "Sam has something to say at Brookfield". Will he tell all to revenge himself on Ruth? Will he hand in his notice? Which, presumably, has to happen now because he can hardly keep working there can he?

I'm glad Ruth finally said "I can't do this to the kids". It's time she started thinking about them instead of herself for a bit

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Ruth Archer
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 04:10 AM

Selfish?! I've done nothing but think of those kids for 13 years. I just know I'll regret not shagging the arse off a cowhand for the rest of me life...

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Sam the cowman
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 06:35 AM

I'm going into lodgings with Derek Fletcher. Maybe I could score with Jean Harvey.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Larkin
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 09:22 AM

i think sam could turn out to be a bunny boiler.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,Freda Fry
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 11:57 AM

Sam can boil my bunny any time

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Schantieman
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 12:18 PM

...and anyway, it's not a soap, it's an everyday story of country folk.

At least, that's what it says on my copy of the Radio Tomes, circa 1962.

S

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 12:30 PM

I've been 'in absentia' and haven't heard an episode for a whole week, but if all this means that Sam packs up and leaves, I shall remain dry eyed.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST,the cow
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 12:41 PM

He probably will, and then David will be wondering why Ruth is crying hot tears, and I'll be wondering if some new cowman will be putting his hands in unspeakable places next ... mmmeughg

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Schantieman
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 12:49 PM

Does Sam know about Ruth's missing you know what?   I thought that might, er, come out last night!

S

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 12:56 PM

Damn, and there was me contemplating a bit meself.. Ah well, I'll go to the pictures and watch other people doing it...

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Folkiedave
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 01:25 PM

Maybe I could score with Jean Harvey.

Why not, everyone else has!!

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 02:17 PM

Actually, it's Ruth who puts her hands in unspeakable places...she does the AI on the farm. Lovely and warm for your hands on a cold morning....

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 02:50 PM

I thought it was 'wye aye' not AI, wor Rooth did Lynne!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Schantieman
Date: 08 Nov 06 - 06:26 PM

And you know all about AI, Lynne!

S

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 09 Nov 06 - 02:53 AM

Indeed Steve. I always thought about writing to the beeb and suggesting they employ me as the Archers' local inseminator for a bit of verissimilitude. (Good word, but how the hell do you spell it??)

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 09 Nov 06 - 04:58 AM

Authenticity is easier to spell Lynne ¦¬]
G.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 09 Nov 06 - 09:39 AM

Oh yes Giok but it's not nearly so pretty!

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 09 Nov 06 - 04:44 PM

Lynne

Could you perhaps rephrase that as "the Archers' cows' local inseminator (inseminatrix?)"

Schantieman Steve - I did pop the question, in an earlier post, of whether Sam knew Ruth wasn't all there. I've now heard Phil suggest she needs a tonic, so I hope she gets a large Gordons to go with it.

Kitty

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: MBSLynne
Date: 10 Nov 06 - 04:07 AM

She couldn't cope with a large Sam's so how's she going to go on with a large Gordon's?

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Nov 06 - 04:38 AM

Presumably, with the need for an AI person on the farm, the bull isn't up to much?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Nov 06 - 05:09 AM

By Farmer Brown's tractor, I'm virgo intacta, I've never had a bull by the horn!
G.

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Nov 06 - 05:21 AM

And there I thought you were a Capricorn....



The old Goat.
(ducks for cover and hides in the barn....)

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: The Archers UK Soap
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 10 Nov 06 - 06:02 AM

Lynne, THAT was NAUGHTY [does Gordon come on mudcat?]